Loud As The Hell You Want?

Summary: 'Hell NO, I won't tell them to quieten down!' What Rod really felt when he phoned up about Princeton and Kate Monster. Alone. Miserable. And in love with his roommate. Rod/Nicky.

This is my FIRST Avenue Q fic and I think it's safe to say that Rod and Nicky are the best characters. Ever. I really hope you like it, so please read and review!


"Yes, Princeton!"

"Oh, God, Kate! Oh my God!"

Rod gritted his teeth as he paced around his small apartment. The noises seemed to be coming from everywhere, practically suffocating him. It was so unfair and it was taking every bit of his self-control not to smash his head against the wall.

Everyone around him seemed to be perfectly happy and in love, when he couldn't have the only thing in the world he wanted. Nicky.

His said best friend and roommate was slouched on Rod's favourite chair, watching TV with his feet propped up on the coffee table. Yet another thing to get Rod aggravated.

"I can't stand to listen to this!" He suddenly burst out, "I'm going to phone up Gary and –"

"Oh, Rod, leave it, buddy!" Nicky chuckled, flicking through the channels randomly.

"No, I will not leave it, Nicky!" The red-headed banker fumed, "And will you please turn that off? I can hardly hear myself think in this apartment."

"Better than hearing the sex though, right?" Nicky gave a well-known smirk as Rod began to blush, "Aw, sit down and ignore it! They're just havin' fun!"

"Clearly," Rod grumbled, picking up the phone and ignoring Nicky's request in case he did something stupid like...like hug him. Or put his hand on his lap. He abruptly shook his head, trying to stay focused. He'd been through this a million times before – Nicky could never be interested in him. True, it tore his heart apart every single day, but he had to remind himself of the cold fact, "But they can have fun quietly. I've got an early shift tomorrow."

"You're always at work." Nicky sulked, resting his head against his hand.

"Well, someone needs to pay the bills." He responded icily, "Seeing as YOU don't have a job!"

Nicky rolled his eyes, "Whatever, Rod. I just meant that sometimes I miss your company, that's all."

Rod's heart started thumping painfully, "You do?"

"'Course I do! You're my best pal!"

"Well..." Rod coughed nervously, turning his back so Nicky couldn't see his expression as he dialled Gary Coleman's number, "Th-thanks, Nicky."

"No problem!" The green man beamed cheerfully, then frowned as he realised what his friend was doing, "Aw, you're not really phoning Gary, are ya?"

"Yes, I am!"

"But they're in LOVE, Rod! It's always good to express your feelings –"

"No, it's not!" Rod shot back angrily before he could stop himself, "Sometimes people who SHOULD admit their feelings CAN'T, because it sounds so stupid and...and pathetic! It doesn't matter if THEY'RE in love, because it's not like anyone really cares!"

Nicky blinked at him, "Uh, Rod, are you ok?"

"Absolutely!" He replied, slightly hysterically, "The...The phone's ringing now, so turn that down. Please."

Nicky, still looking perplexed, muted the TV as Rod began to speak. "Hi, Gary? Um, this is a little...awkward..." He laughed shakily and Nicky found himself smiling. Rod had a cute laugh. "But, you know, as you're the Superintendant I was just wondering if you could tell Princeton and Kate Monster to quieten down? It's a little hard to concentrate –"

He was abruptly cut off as Gary yelled back, "Hell NO, I won't tell them to quieten down!", and the phone slammed at the other end. Rod stared at it soundlessly for a few moments, before glancing back at an amused Nicky.

"He...He hung up on me!"

"I did tell you to leave it, buddy!" Nicky said sympathetically, "But hey, I'm sure it won't last all night..." He broke off and started laughing, "Unless Kate Monster is really, really good in bed –"

"Nicky!" Rod said, outraged, "That is GROSS!" He was more than a little upset at this remark as Nicky had single-handedly reminded him in the most painful way that he was straight. "Look, I'm going to bed. Good night."

"What's the matter?" Nicky frowned, "I didn't mean to upset you –"

"And why would I be upset?" Rod said irritably, "Maybe...Maybe Kate Monster is good in bed. We'll never know. I mean, I'm interested in women as much as you are and –"

"Why are you being so uptight? Come on, sit down –"

"I'M NOT BEING UPTIGHT!" Rod yelled, clenching his fists, "If you're enjoying the sex noises so much why don't you go out and find a girl for yourself? That way you won't need to listen and wish you were PRINCETON!"

Nicky retaliated with raised eyebrows, "Whoa, whoa! Why would I want to be Princeton? I'm not interested in Kate at ALL! God, Rod, you're actin' crazy!"

Rod gave a shaky sigh and closed his eyes, "Sorry. Sorry, Nicky."

"That's ok." Nicky said carefully, standing up so he could pat Rod's shoulder. Just the touch of him made Rod feel a little weak, "I didn't mean to...I mean, I don't have the hots for Kate..."

"I...I know." Rod said quietly, "I'm just a little tired, I guess. I should go to bed."

Nicky looked at him silently before gently kissing him on the head, "I'm really not interested in Kate." He whispered and Rod felt his eyes fill up with tears as Nicky patted him on the shoulder again and walked out of the apartment.

Rod felt confused, shaky and above all, elated. He couldn't quite believe that had really happened. Nicky had...kissed him. He'd basically said...

He sprung towards the phone again, this time eagerly. He hoped Christmas Eve had finished her wild sex with Brian. He had a lot to take about to Avenue Q's only therapist.