Wow I have not written fanfic in a really long time

like a REALLY long time and I have unfinished fics I haven't worked on in months I am such a terrible person why do I keep fandom-hopping

Also wow there is a significant deficit of Raildex fic and especially Touma/Accelerator fic there is like... three of those. That makes me sadder because I actually ship that semi-seriously as opposed to the way I'm under the impression the rest of the fandom ships it, which is semi-ironically to entirely ironically.

warning: this fic will at various points in time include the following: massive amounts of swearing, sex jokes, M/F, M/M and possibly F/F implications if Kuroko shows up, violence (not graphic violence, but descriptive nonetheless)

chapter specific warnings: Accelerator's frequent use of foul language

rant rant rant shut up Nat get on with the fic


Prologue

Mornings, Accelerator decides, are meant to be loud and invasive. They are meant to be spent yelling at Worst to give him the last fucking chair, and no, she does not need it to put her feet up on. They are meant to include him combing cereal out of his hair because Last Order learned what a food fight was the day before and decided they needed to have one right now. They are meant to set off the fire alarm when he realizes he left toast in the toaster too long while he was distracted. Mornings, he thinks, are not supposed to be spent trying to find Kamijou Touma's dorm in the freezing cold. Not at all.

Never.

This is a shitty morning. Also a frigid one. Accelerator tries to zip up his jacket, and groans angrily when he realizes it's already zipped and it's seriously that fucking cold out. He jams his free hand in his pocket and tightens his grip on his cane, wishing he had a pair of gloves.

Maybe he can borrow a pair from Kamijou when he finds his goddamn dorm.

If he's being perfectly honest with himself, Accelerator does not need to be out at nine in the morning on a Sunday looking for Kamijou Touma. He could be back at Yomikawa's, still asleep and probably with Last Order using him as a pillow. He could be out for breakfast and enjoying a cup of hot tea and reheated frozen pancakes. Instead he's freezing his ass off looking for someone he increasingly wants to punch in the gut.

After a while, Accelerator finds his way back to Kamijou's dorm. Racking his brains to remember what floor and room number he should be heading for, he makes his way up the stairs and turns down a hallway.

It should be just around the corner, he thinks, and turns the corner.

And there, standing outside the door Accelerator is about to knock on, is a certain Level Five Electromaster, rubbing her hands together to try and warm up.

As if this morning couldn't get any fucking worse, Accelerator thinks. Regardless, he walks up and, ignoring Misaka Mikoto, he knocks on the door to Kamijou's dorm.

"Hey, what the hell?" Mikoto snaps. Accelerator sighs and tilts his head to glance at her.

"Out of curiosity," he says, "Why are you here?"

Mikoto stares at him like he's just asked her if she'd like to eat a live fish. Her mouth hangs open in disbelief.

"Close that before you catch flies," Accelerator advises, and since Kamijou hasn't shown himself yet, he knocks on the door a second time.

Mikoto recovers her wits and says loudly, "Why am I here? Why the heck are you here?"

"I have business."

"What kind of business?"

"None of yours."

"Well, excuse me. I happen to have 'business' with this jerk too," Mikoto informs him. Maybe it's because it's cold out, but her cheeks look particularly rosy. Accelerator feels a strong desire to casually tip Mikoto over the railing behind them, and unusually it's not because of her involvement in the Level Six Shift.

It dawns on both Accelerator and Mikoto, after a moment, that while they were talking, Kamijou Touma has once again failed to answer the door. They look at each other, somewhat apprehensively.

"Maybe he's still asleep," suggests Mikoto.

"Even so."

Mikoto shrugs and knocks on the door. The two of them stand there awkwardly, somehow having silently come to terms with the fact that both of them are there and neither of them is leaving.

"He's not answering," Accelerator says impatiently. "Why is nobody answering?"

"I'd have thought Index-san would've heard the door if he didn't," Mikoto adds.

"Knock again."

Mikoto knocks again, loudly.

"Why do you need to see him anyway?" she asks, crossing her arms. She refuses to look at him, as if the fact that he's there along with her is some sort of affront to her existence.

"Remember that part where I told you it was none of your goddamn business?"

"Because if you could get it over with quickly and leave us alone, that'd be great."

"And exactly why does your business take precedence over mine?"

"Because, well… it just does, okay?"

"Middle schoolers. I will never understand you."

"Why is he not answering the door?" Mikoto screams suddenly, throwing her hands up in frustration.

"Let's find out," Accelerator suggests, and tries turning the knob.

"It's probably locked," Mikoto says. "And there's totally no way I'll let you pick his lock, okay?"

The door clicks open. Accelerator smirks. "You were saying?"

"We're just gonna barge into his dorm?"

"Pretty much." Accelerator pushes the door open and steps inside. The lights are off. The doors to the balcony are open and the curtains flutter lightly in the wind. The covers on the bed are pushed back and the television is on.

The glass from the window is smashed in. There are broken dishes scattered around the room.

Index is unconscious on the floor, and Kamijou Touma is nowhere to be seen.


Review if you like.

Maybe I'll draw some pictures to go with this later I don't know.