This was done at 1 a.m and I had just got back from a very good day.
Thought I'd post up a stupid little oneshot. Haven't been here in a while. Really.
So to those who are still sticking around here, have a read and feel free to criticize my garbage writing skills. My eyes itch. Yes, this is very, very random but I don't know, it felt so good to write Teen Titans again and I just wanted to post something up before I go insane.
I love you all.
I get all angsty when I don't have enough sleep.
"You see the thing is, Raven, even I have my limits and you're about this close to actually surpass this," Gar said quietly, holding up his hand, his forefinger and thumb curling towards each other, almost touching. Raven turned away. He mimicked her and breathed out gently. "So before you actually do, I'm going to be the one stepping back. This isn't my fight anymore. It's yours. You don't need me so there's no point in me sticking around anymore."
He turned on his feet and walked away. in that moment, Raven felt as if someone had punched her gut. She collapsed to the floor, her eyes threatening to close, her body aching with emotions. She bit her lips hard until she felt the coppery taste of blood.
It was no use. This time around, it was Gar who had left. He'd left HER. she'd been the one who had crossed the line. Raven didn't understand. She thought he had finally been the one for her. she thought that they might actually have a future together. Raven picked herself back up and dusted her knees.
She refused to weep. This wasn't her and it never will be. eight years of knowing him; four years of bickering, three years of friendship and a year of a relationship. Time had gone by so fast and now finally, finally things were beginning to clear. The team was really breaking apart and she couldn't be the one keeping them together. That had always been Starfire's job. She was the glue that kept all of them in place all these years but now, that bond wrapping all of them into a tight cocoon was now slowly, fragilely beginning to unravel itself. Raven realised with a painful jolt that this time...
This time Starfire wouldn't be there to tighten it again.
"This isn't my fight anymore. It's yours. You don't need me so there's no point in me sticking around anymore."
The thing she was fighting for; reuniting the broken bonds of the team, was the exact reason that drove yet another Titan away. She knew Gar was working as hard to bring back what was lost before but ever since Cyborg decided to leave first, things have started to go downhill.
It wasn't his decision in the first place. Even though Vic had tried to leave the Titans before a couple of times, he always managed to come back because he had a choice but not this time. STAR Labs needed him and he knew he wouldn't be able to devote himself entirely to the team anymore. It was about time too.
In a way, everyone was dealing with their want to leave the place. Dick chose to go back to Gotham. He'd missed it there and everyone could see it. Starfire would join him of course.
So there was Gar and Raven left. Raven took this the hardest. This was her family, her home, her life. She'd never counted on anyone leaving or changing. How very stupid of her to realise that people's emotions and thinking change. How stupid of an empath. Raven squeezed her eyes shut as she closed the doors to her room. she still had a lot to do; pack, pack and pack.
She wasn't even sure where she was going. The thing was, she had solely promised herself she would convince everyone to not leave.
Look where that got her.
Look. She'd lost the one person she never wanted to. Guilt swarmed Raven like bees to honey. She couldn't believe this was happening. She couldn't believe that this was really the end. Beastboy was leaving her, she could feel it. the rest of them already had.
Sadness stabbed Raven's heart sharply and she gasped a strangled breath.
Suddenly, a wave of confusion wrapped her head. Raven frowned. Who the heck was feeling this strongly? And why... why confusion? Was there a little bit of sadness there? perhaps disappointment?
Raven practically ran to her door. She opened it and there he stood, hands in his pockets, his back leaning beside her door, his head bowed down. He saw her open her door and walked towards her.
"Gar I-" She began but he held a hand to stop her.
"Look, about... about what I said-"
And that was when Raven jumped onto him and gave him the mother of all kisses. Sorry poured into that kiss like a waterfall. She wasn't good at admitting she was wrong but this was her best way to prove that she was sorry.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, breaking off the kiss but still holding onto him. "I'm sorry. Everyone's leaving, Gar. My family is leaving me and I don't know what to do. I'm scared. My mother left me and now the only people that I ever cared about are going away too. I don't know where to go. I don't know who to turn to. You were my only hope and I pushed you away too. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
There wasn't much left for her to do after that. She held on to him and slowly, finally, felt arms wrapping around her, returning her embrace and tightening their grip. "You've got nothing to lose here, Rae. We're all still here. We're all still family. We're just... heading our own separate ways. There's no bad blood between any of us, Rae. We're still here, still together but just... a little far apart. Just because we don't see each other doesn't mean we won't be friends, Rae," Gar said quietly against Raven's hair.
"We aren't going anywhere. We're staying put, you and me. We'll figure something out. there's no changing their minds but we're here and still together. You have me and I have you and that's all that matters."
That was all that mattered and Gar was right.