A/N: Hello lovely readers~! This is my first Kaoru/Kyouya fic so I'm sorry if it sucks. I recently stumbled upon this pairing and fell in love. This is a song fic to The Goo Goo Dolls "Let Love In", so I hope you enjoy it. I tried to keep them in character as much as I could, but I do apologize if they are OOC. The lyrics are in bold and italics, Kaoru's point of view is in normal font, and Kyouya's point of view is in regular italics.
Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran High School Host club or any of the characters, etc. I also do not own The Goo Goo Dolls or "Let Love In" or any of their lyrics, etc.
You wait, wanting this world
To let you in.
And you stand there,
A frozen light
In dark and empty streets.
Hikaru and I have always been on the edge of the world; it was always everyone else and then us in our own little world. The change started for us partly when we started the host club, but mostly when we met Haruhi. She was the first to truly tell us apart and to tell us that we are really two individuals even though we look alike. Since then our world has expanded and we've started to let people in. I have noticed a change in Hikaru, he's falling in love with Haruhi, and starting to leave me behind. I'm afraid of being alone; I know I pushed him to be with her because it's what best for him. So now I stand frozen and wishing there was someone who knew me and just me. Yet, I doubt that will happen, I'll always be the other half of two.
I have always set myself apart from others because I know where I need to be and where my final goal is, but sometimes I just can't help thinking what's the point? The youngest of three sons I'll never inherit anything; I've got to be better than them. I sometimes wish someone would let me in and see me for more than just the third son. For now I'll wait on the edge of my father's world trying to stand out.
You smile hiding behind
A God-given face,
But I know you're so much more.
Everything they ignore
Is all that I need to see.
I will keep smiling and keep up the cherished brotherly love act even though it kills me that we are growing apart. The club is about to start so I put on my mask and that's when I realize I'm not the only one hiding. Casually gazing across the room I notice Kyouya flash a fake smile; he too hides behind a mask. To others he's the cold, cool, and calculating shadow king but I see that he's more than that; I just haven't figured it out yet.
The club is about to start, time to flash my charming 'cool type' smile, but the way today is going I'll have to try harder to fight my annoyance. I glance up from my laptop and catch the younger Hitachiin's gaze. I see a glint in those golden eyes that different from his usual mischievous one. Even though he's being fussed over by his brother he can't hide the look of loneliness in his eyes. I'm interested but try to ignore the feeling of empathy that races through my heart. There would be nothing to gain in finding out why he's lonely. He doesn't know it but I, like Haruhi, know the differences between the two twins, the ones most can't see.
You're the only one I ever believed in
The answer that could never be found
The moment you decided to let love in
Hikaru was the only one I could believe and the only one I could trust but somehow I still feel empty. My heart pounds as the shadow king's and my eyes meet, could he be the answer I'm searching for? Could I be in love—no that's impossible—but the bells won't stop ringing in my head and I can't help but realize how similar we are.
What is this feeling? Why does my heart insist on beating so fast when Kaoru looks my way? I think back on all I have observed about him and I realize that we may be not be so different from one another. I read the emotions on his face, he's lonely and has always been cut off from the world like I have. Now that the Hitachiins are growing apart, he's realized just how different him and Hikaru are. Could this be what I'm looking for? Can I really let Kaoru in?
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel
The end of fear is where we begin
The moment we decided to let love in
Some time has passed from when I first realized how similar we are and my feelings haven't gone away. I want to tear down the walls he puts up. I want him to see me for who I am, but I'm afraid. What if he doesn't feel they way about me the way I feel about him? What if I'm wrong in my assumptions about him? I don't know if he even likes men! And yet I want to take the risk I want to let him in.
Kaoru doesn't know it, he doesn't realize how special he is and how he is not Hikaru. I want to walk over and tell him but I'm afraid. I think I might be falling for him. The more time I spend with him the more I want him to know the real me. The me that's not just the third Ootori son, but fear makes me stay behind the safety of my laptop where everything is in my control. I want to take the risk and let him in.
Wishing for you to find your way
And I'll hold on for all you need
That's all we need to say
Kyouya, I want you to find your path, I know you're more than just the third son. You don't need to worry I'll be here for you and I can be everything you need. Don't you see how we are the same?
You are more than just the one of the Hitachiins, I wish you could see that and find your own way. I can be here for you and be everything you need. If only I wasn't too afraid to stray from my father's path.
I'll take my chances while
You take your time with
This game you play
This is it! I'm ready to take my chance I'm tired of playing games and waiting for you to move. I swallow as I approach you after the host club, I've told my brother I'd meet him at home and now it's just the two of us. You look so somber as you type on your laptop lost in business. "Kyouya-sempai?" You look up, your stormy eyes meeting mine and I almost loose my nerve.
"What is it Kaoru?"
"You're more than just the third son and I can see that. Over the past month I've realized that, yes you may be the cold and calculating shadow king, but I know you're just searching for someone to see the real you. I know because it's how I feel."
"Is that so?" the fear sweeps through me and I want to run away but I've decided to take this chance. I wish you would stop hiding.
"Sempai, I think I'm in love with you! I know you may not feel the same and that you may not even like guys but I needed to tell you." I shut my eyes and wince away as if I'm waiting for him to hit me.
My heart pounds as I watch the others leave and you telling your brother to leave. I want to be excited that we are alone together but at the same time I'm terrified.
"Kyouya-sempai?" my heart stops when I hear you call my name.
"What is it Kaoru?" I can't help but see how nervous you are and how out of character that is for you, but I'm nervous on the inside too.
"You're more than just the third son and I can see that. Over the past month I've realized that, yes you may be the cold and calculating shadow king, but I know you're just searching for someone to see the real you. I know because it's how I feel." I gasp inwardly as you finish realizing you may really be the answer I'm looking for.
"Is that so?" I reply and I want to jump for joy but I'm scared so I continue to keep my cool and play my stupid game. I can tell my answer upsets you and I want to do something about it.
"Sempai, I think I'm in love with you! I know you may not feel the same and that you may not even like guys but I needed to tell you." I can't believe it, how could he possibly feel the same way? I don't know what to say, I'm so nervous. This is so wrong, I'm not suppose to be nervous and unsure, I'm suppose to be the 'cool type!'
But I can't control your soul
You need to let me know
You leaving or you gonna stay
His silence makes me panic and I want to hide. I can't control how he feels but I need to know. Is he going to run away or is he going to feel the same? "Okay you need to say something…"
He swallows, pushing up his glasses. "Kaoru you are more than just the younger Hitachiin. I know you and your brother have been growing apart for sometime now and you feel lonely. You and your brother are different people, you have a softer, kinder and more serious side than your brother does and that's one of the things I've always liked about you." He sighs.
"Really?" I ask, not daring to believe his words, and yet I can't help but feel happy that maybe he sees me for the real me hidden under the 'little devil' twins type.
"Yes, Kaoru this is hard for me." I watch him tremble and I want to hold him.
I place my hand on his shoulder wishing to be comforting. "You can tell me anything Sempai."
"I'm not suppose to but I think I'm in love with you too. My father would never approve and it could ruin his plans to marry me off to some daughter of some company in the future but right now I don't care."
I hate myself as I watch you nervously wring your hands because I'm too afraid to say anything.
"Okay you need to say something…" Kaoru whispers as he meets my eyes, worry fills his beautiful golden eyes.
I swallow finally deciding he took the chance and so should I. "Kaoru you are more than just the younger Hitachiin. I know you and your brother have been growing apart for sometime now and you feel lonely. You and your brother are different people, you have a softer, kinder and more serious side than your brother does and that's one of the things I've always liked about you." I sigh, it's out there and I can't take it back. I notice his eyes fill with excitement and hope and it makes me want to smile.
"Really?" his voice is laced with hope and disbelief
"Yes, Kaoru this is hard for me." I start to shake because I'm so afraid from straying for the path I've set out. I feel his hand come to rest on my shoulder as I stare at the ground and I'm somehow comforted by this.
"You can tell me anything Sempai." He smiles and I can hear the honesty in his voice.
"I'm not suppose to but I think I'm in love with you too. My father would never approve and it could ruin his plans to marry me off to some daughter of some company in the future but right now I don't care." That was way more than I meant to share but maybe I feel comfortable around Kaoru because I now know how similar we are.
You're the only one I ever believed in
The answer that could never be found.
The moment you decided to let love in.
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel,
The end of fear is where we begin
The moment we decided to let love in.
I can't contain my excitement at his confession. He's the one I can relate to, he's the one I can believe in and the answer I could never find. My arms seem to move on their own and wrap themselves around the dark-haired boy in front of me. I press my lips to his and at first he doesn't react, but then I feel him melt into the kiss and kiss back. It's then that I understand I have found my real mirror image in the dark haired shadow king.
I can see the excitement pulse through the redhead as my words sink in. It makes me smile, a genuine smile, not one of my usual fake ones. Before I realize what is happening, Kaoru throws his arms around my neck and he kisses me. I don't react at first because I'm so surprised, but everything about this his feels right and I allow myself to participate. I have finally found the answer that I have been looking for and the missing piece of my life in the handsome redheaded-angel that is Kaoru Hitachiin. I want to slap myself for how cheesy my thoughts have become but I'm too blinded by the most amazing kiss.
There's nothing we can do about
The things we have to do without.
The only way to feel again
Is let love in.
A/N: So there you have it! I hope you like it and feel free to tell me what you think.