Author's note: I dedicate this story to my sister and also my BTR Twin and friend ElevatedSuperstar. They're both awesome and love James, so this is for them. :)
Also, to the amazing, sweet and talented James Maslow, Happy Birthday! :D
Just a really short one-shot about James comforting Logan.
No slash, just friendship.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Enough For The Both of Us
James searched the dark apartment as quietly as he could. Anxiety slowly started creeping into his chest. He continued to look in every room, while waiting for a text back, answering his question and hopefully, easing his worry.
'Where are you?'
It was the middle of the night. James had lost track of the time. He had been laying in his bed, staring at the ceiling as his mind replayed the days' events.
It had been a normal day for the aspiring pop stars. Rehearsal was held most of the day. They had all sang and danced their hardest, trying with their every fiber to impress their boss and CEO. They had a concert in three days, so everything had to be perfect.
"Faster! Harder! Better!" The booming voice of Gustavo rang through James' head. He'd been especially cranky that day, nervous about the CEO Griffin's arrival to assess Big Time Rush's progress. It seemed that no matter how perfectly they practiced, Gustavo was able to find something wrong. He was grinding everyone down, and annoying them all.
Though, Gustavo seemed particularly disappointed in anything and everything Logan did. They couldn't get through one routine without Gustavo stopping them and yelling at Logan to, "Jump higher! Spin faster! Dance better!" It was getting on the boys' nerves that he seemed to be picking on Logan, and they could tell, it was slowly pulling Logan back down to that small, insecure boy he used to be, before he met the guys.
Logan had always been a quiet, well-mannered boy, always a people-pleaser. He felt that he always had to be perfect, so he always tried his best at everything he did.
But his verbally abusive parents, his horrible teachers, and every bully that Logan encountered, managed to shrink what little self-esteem Logan had. They crushed it and stomped it down into the ground.
The boys always tried their hardest to help Logan get back up, to re-build his confidence. Slowly but surely, they were making small progress with their kind words, and punches thrown at anyone that bothered Logan. They practically smothered him in any praise and love they could offer Logan, and slowly, he was starting to believe them. To believe that he wasn't worthless or a screw-up or a good-for-nothing waste of space.
But he still had his moments when all those names and words came creeping back into his mind, cutting him up and throwing him down. Those were the times that he needed his friends the most, to shut the hateful voices up.
But Logan, out of force of habit, never went to anyone for help. He never wanted to bother anyone with his problems. So it was up to the boys to find out if he was okay or not, on their own.
James knew that Logan would have been upset by the day, so he had gotten out of his bed to check on him. But when he had gotten there, Logan was gone.
James checked Kendall's and Logan's room for a third time. Still, it was the same. Kendall was fast asleep in his bed, and Logan's bed, was empty.
James silently closed the door and huffed to the living room frustratedly. He nearly jumped out of his skin when his phone finally vibrated in his pocket, and he swung the device out, his face now illuminated in the dark room, by the small screen.
James bolted out of apartment 2J and ran straight to the stair doors, knowing they'd be faster than the elevator. His heavy footsteps clanged and stomped loudly on the metal steps but he didn't care. He wasn't thinking about waking up the other residents of the building, trying to sleep at the late hour. All that mattered to James was getting to the roof, as fast as he could.
The door to the roof swung open, and the cool, L.A. wind hit James' face lightly. His eyes scanned the small area, until they landed on the figure sitting on the edge of the roof. One leg was hugged close to his body, while the other dangled off the edge nonchalantly.
Fear crept into James' chest, and he approached slowly, sitting next to him cautiously. He tentatively hung his own legs over the edge, looking over the concrete below.
Logan stared down at the city below, his cheek resting on his knee. "Where do you think they're going?" Logan asked softly as he watched a few people walk down the street. "It's so late out. Where could they go?"
"24 hour convenience store?" James suggested as he watched the people. "Or maybe they have night classes or something."
"I guess that makes sense." Logan said. "I wonder how people can run 24 hour stores. They have to be up all night. That must be really hard." He looked over to James. "You think it's hard for them?"
James shrugged, slowly relaxing on the edge of the roof. "Maybe since they do it all the time, they're used to it. So it's not as hard for them as it would be for someone just starting."
"Yeah." Logan said softly, then looked back down at the street. "That makes sense."
They were both quiet for a while, just listening to the whistling of the wind blowing passed them and through their hair.
"Do you think it would hurt?" Logan asked suddenly, staring straight down at the ground.
Again, the fear and anxiety crept back into James' chest, gripping him tightly. He looked over at Logan cautiously. "What?" He asked carefully.
Logan was silent for a moment, just staring at the ground. "Falling." He finally answered.
James swallowed hard passed a lump in his throat. "Wha-" His voice cracked and he had to clear it. "What do you mean?"
"Do you think you'd feel anything?" Logan explained. "When you hit the ground. From so high, the death would probably be instant. Do you think you'd have enough time to feel the pain before you died?"
James swallowed hard again, trying to think of the right way to approach the question. "Yeah,". He answered. "I think it would hurt. A lot. I think there'd be just enough time to feel all of the pain, and that small second of life you had left, would feel like an eternity of torture."
"Hmm." Logan hummed in contemplation. "Not if you died of fright on the way down." He said softly.
"True,". James said. "But that would only be if you were actually afraid of heights, falling, and death."
"I guess." Logan sighed.
"Plus,". James added. "What about the people you'd be leaving behind? Even if you died of fright before you felt the pain of the impact, they'd be feeling the pain of the heartbreak for a lifetime. So, even if you were the one that fell off, they'd be the ones hurting the most. It doesn't make that much sense but it's true. That's not entirely fair, is it?"
A small smile crept across Logan's face as he stared at the city. "No,". He said softly. "It's not." Then he turned to James. "I guess we better not fall then."
James visibly relaxed and smiled with a nod. "Yeah." They both turned back to the city. James subtly scooted closer to Logan and they sat in silence for a while.
Finally, Logan broke the silence with a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry." He said softly.
James looked over to him with a frown. "For what?"
"For. . .Being so, incompetent all the time." Logan said. "I can't ever do anything right." He hugged his knee closer. "I'm ruining the bands' chances at anything. I'm just holding you all back."
James sighed. "Logan, I love you, but you can be so thick-headed and stubborn sometimes." He said as gently as he could. He placed his hands on Logan's shoulders, turning him towards him so they sat sideways on the edge, and looked him hard in the eyes. "You are incredible Logan. Gustavo was just having an off day today. He didn't mean anything he said."
"But he said that I couldn't-" Logan started.
"He didn't mean it." James said. "You can too dance and sing, and both Gustavo and Griffin know it. You're amazing at everything you do Logan. You're smart, talented, and incredibly nice and considerate."
Logan dropped his gaze. "But I'm-"
"Hey,". James lightly shook his shoulders to stop him. "You think we could know you for eight years and not know what kind of person you are? Kendall, Carlos, Mama Knight, Katie and I know you better than anyone else in the world ever could. Even you. We know that you would do anything to make everyone happy, we know that you don't like asking for help because you think it would bother them, even if that's completely untrue. We know that math is your favorite subject in school, we know that toast is your favorite snack, we know about your passion to be a doctor, we know everything about you. Don't you think we'd know more than someone you just met would?"
Logan's cheeks lit up the slightest shade of pink, and he smiled lightly. "When did you get so smart?" He muttered as he looked up at James.
James smiled and pulled Logan close, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "I learnt it from the best, bud." They looked back at the city. "So, you believe me yet?" He asked.
Logan leaned against James' chest and sighed. "I don't know. I want to, but. . .It's just hard." He looked up at James. "I'm sorry."
James ruffled his hair playfully. "That's okay bud. We'll work on it."
Logan smiled and nodded, then yawned.
"Bed time." James said, then carefully stood up and pulled Logan to his feet, readjusting his arm around his shoulders. Then he lead him from the edge and across the roof.
"You really think you can do it?" Logan asked softly as they walked back to the stairs door.
"Do what?" James asked.
"Fix me." Logan muttered softly. "Fix my confidence problem thing."
James gave him a comforting squeeze. "You don't need to be fixed Logan. You just need some encouragement. As for the confidence thing, I'm sure we'll get you to a better level in no time."
Logan chuckled lightly. "I don't know James, it's an awfully big job." He looked up at him. "I'm pretty messed up you know." He said playfully.
"Nah,". James said with a smile. "You're not that messed up. I'm sure we can build up your confidence."
"How?" Logan asked. "We'd need a lot to get me to a normal level." He said miserably.
James smiled. "Well, I have enough for the both of us." He said. "We can share."
Logan smiled and wrapped his arms around James as they walked. "Thanks James."
James rubbed Logan's arm soothingly. "Anytime Logie."
Author's note: I know it's incredibly short, but it just came to me while I was trying to sleep, and I really wanted to do a Logan and James bromance fic, and I really wanted to write something, so here ya go. Sorry it sucks, and that it's so short. Sorry. :\
I liked writing it though, and I think it's cute, so that's why I'm posting it. :)
My sister is awesome. She actually found some errors and fixed them for me. :) Also, she liked the story, thought it was really cute. ^^