AN: Okay, let me explain this. This fic is meant to be confusing, so if you don't get it, that's the point. If you do get it… I love you to pieces and your mind is as messed up as mine. :D

If you really don't understand what's going on and would like to, don't be afraid to ask, I'll try my best to explain it to you. There's also an info/explanation on my profile now.


The world outside is cold, cruel and a heartless place.

The black recess of your mind is no better.

Stuck in limbo.

His hand holding yours.

Crawling into a dark hole, pitch black, no sound, alone, would be a relief.

Foreheads pressed together, golden eyes staring into green.


Empty, no thoughts flitting.

Golden emotions.

Your mind is empty.

Dark and hollow.

You wish it was.

Wish, wish, wishful thinking.

He holds your hand.

Block it.

The world.

Go to this dark, mercifully dark, place, and never leave.

Never leave.



He always says your name so happily.

Singsong, like it's too beautiful to be spoken in a mundane way.


Do you want to die?


Answer yourself.

But I want to go to nothingness.

Black and bright.

No worries, no worries.

He kisses you softly.

Want to die?



And live with him forever.

Never leave.

Kill me now.

Anytime you need him, he is there.

Why won't you leave?

Don't leave!

Crawl into bed, his lips brush your forehead.



In his eyes.

Please kill me now.

But maybe tomorrow.


Black and nothing.

Let me go there.

Don't ever let me go!

Don't ever leave me!

Holds you tight, kind, gentle.

I don't.

But I do.

Nothingness would be pleasant.

But this is too.

To feel nothing.

To feel him, as he holds your hand.

Your mind is losing.



Look it's almost gone!

Tethered to Earth.

All for him


Kill me now.

Don't you ever.