THIS HOME SHE LEFT ME BEHIND IN
My dad yelled about me being late for supper since it was a school night. He left me a swollen cheek too. He's been drinking again.
My mom asked me the other day how I felt about leaving and moving, I asked her "What about dad?" That had made her cringe.
And she hasn't spoken to me about it since.
After dinner I went to my room and locked the door. I lay there for a while and I think of calling Nicki. I could always talk to him but sometimes he'd make it weird. Apart of me really doesn't mind.
The next day at school we actually start doing work. I'm also thinking of signing up for baseball, which doesn't start until the second semester.
Today Nicki asked if he could sit with me and my friends at lunch, I didn't mind but some of my friends thought he was strange, which he is.
"Hey Bobby." Jenna says at lunch.
"Hey." I say coolly.
"Mind if we sit?" She and her cousin, Vicki, stand there.
"Nah, help yourself." I say and I look at Nicki who's seated at the end on the other side. Jenna sits next to me, and her cousin Vicki sits on the other side next to Nicki. Nicki looks awkward but Vicki keeps trying to talk to him. It's a little pathetic.
"You throwin' any parties Jenna?" I ask.
"No not until Halloween. I'm throwing a huge costume party at this fire hall. My parents already rented it out." She says.
"Sounds cool." I say.
"I was wondering if you all wanted to come." She asks basically everyone at the table.
"Sounds cool. October 31st?"
"Yeah." She says.
"What's so special about Halloween?" Nicki asks while eating.
"I don't know. It's just Halloween." Jenna says curtly.
"It'll be so fun." Vicki smiles.
"Yeah…I bet." Nicki frowns.
"Nicholas, why are you so weird?" Jenna asks and we all look at her. "You've always been so…strange. Do you hate everyone or something?"
"No." Nicki says.
"Then what's your problem?" Jenna glares at him. "You don't like me?"
"I never said that." Nicki's voice rises.
"Then what?!" Jenna goes off.
"Jenna, calm down." Vicki says.
I laugh to break up the tension. "Yeah it's just Nicki. He's weird, don't bother yelling at him." I say, but I see Nicki give me that puppy dog look. The one I can't stand. He leaves and sits somewhere else.
"Nicholas." Vicki says but he keeps walking. "Nice going Jenna." Vicki frowns.
"Ugh, he's such a weirdo. Why do you even like him?" Jenna asks Vicki.
"Shut up. Stop being a bitch." Vicki says.
"Ugh," Jenna scoffs. "What about you Bobby? He's you're friend."
"Well?" Jenna keeps saying.
"I wouldn't say all that." I tell her. Then I keep eating. I'll talk to Nicki later.
After school, I head straight home. After the bus ride, I find Nicki and I decide to talk to him.
"Hey." I say.
"Hey." He says. He tends to sound down but it's just him being him.
"Hey uh, I'm sorry about today. At lunch." I say.
"What about it?" He asks.
"I should've stood up for you." I say.
"No, it's fine." He says.
"Nicki, quit it with the passive aggressive shit." I grab his arm. "Seriously, it gets old." I tell him and he then looks at me.
"You're cheek looks pretty swollen." He says.
"Yeah." I release his arm and hold my cheek.
"Your dad?" He asks.
I don't answer.
"Maybe you should quit with the passive aggressive stuff too Bobby." He says then walks off. I look in his direction. Kind of pissed, I don't say a thing. I just go home.
At dinner it's quiet, as usual. My mom and dad don't talk and I don't try to make them. It's always been like this. It's why I used to spend a lot of time with Nicki. He had his shed. He'd stay in there all day doing lord knows what. It's nice to have somewhere to escape to though.
Up in my room, I hear it all.
"Stop drink goddamn it Harold!" My mom yells downstairs.
"Shut your damn mouth!" My dad yells. There's a slam, a smash and some more noise and I ignore it. I listen to some music until it doesn't cover there fighting anymore. I stare out my window. The air's still warm. I look outside and see a few crows. Gross.
I want to ignore for a little longer since they always do this bullshit. But then I hear something I haven't heard before,
"Alice? Alice, where the hell are you going?" I hear my dad. "You think you're leaving me? To hell with you!"
She said she'd take me…
As I look out my window I see my mom walking. She has a suitcase. She keeps going…and going.
She left me. My heart beats all fast and I feel sick and sort of scared. No I am scared. My mom really abandoned me. When dad would get in his broken moods, my mom would tell me it would all be okay. She's been saying that less and less. Looking even more stressed out. I guess she thought I'd stand up to him, but I'm sure she just couldn't take it anymore.
So she leaves? What will she do? Stay with my grandmother? Flee the country? Maybe she even has another man.
I don't know or care. All I know is that she's gone and I don't know what to do about it.
Call Nicki? What can he do?
Run away? And go where?
There's rattling on my bedroom door.
"Bobby!" My dad screams. "Open up this fucking door!"
I don't say anything. I think I even started crying. Fuck I'm scared, so scared.
My dad busts the door down and all the anger he's built up is unleashed on me.