Playing God

Chapter 22


Author's Note: Hello everyone and welcome to chapter 22 of Playing God. I noticed that when I posted chapter 21, FanFiction was having problems with their email system so, if you didn't know I had posted chapter 21 go read that now. Lucky you. Two chapters in one day! For those of you who did read chapter 21, welcome and I hope you enjoy the show!

Pairings: Light x OC

Warnings: Major spoilers, cussing, violence, an OC, and OOCness

Disclaimer: I in no way own Deathnote nor do I own any of the characters. I make no profit from this fic.

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He could felt the darkness nudge him into a deeper sleep. Its black tendons were wrapping around him and violently jerked him into sleep. His breathing hitched slightly before it settled. He stared into the darkness of wherever he was. He wasn't afraid of the dark, not even intimidated by it, but the thought of someone watching me from afar and getting ready to strike him, made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. The place suddenly grew colder and he involuntarily rubbed his bare arms. He looked all around for any sign of what could have caused the temperature change, but all he saw was black.

He tried walking to see where he was, but after only a few steps he ran into what he believed was a wall. Huffing, he turned to try the other direction, but stopped dead in his tracks when he heard a slight clicking coming from in front of him. His mind was screaming at him to panic, but he kept it at bay for now. To be honest, he was curious as to what this all was. Perhaps he would get his answers soon.

He eyed his prize from afar. It was sitting so innocently there and it gleamed in the small moonlight coming from the window. He chuckled to himself and floated closer to his shining treat. It was the dead of night and he really had nothing to fear, but a strange sensation that he couldn't quite place was telling him to stick to the safe side tonight. He hovered over the wooden table and stared down at the delight that was within his grasp. The sensation pickled at the back of his mind and he turned to make sure no one was coming down the steps.

The stairwell was clear and he turned back to his prize. With the gentlest grip he could manage, he picked his guilty pleasure up by the stem and twirled it around in the air above him. Licking his lips, he checked the corner of his eye to make sure he was still alone before taking a large bite out of the delicious, red apple. Once that savored flavor touched his taste buds, he had to have more and with three more bites the apple was gone. Chuckling, he took one more from the bowl on the table to save for later. Light wouldn't mind. He had bought plenty of apples just yesterday.

He cupped the apple in his hands as he floated up the stairs and carefully opened Light's bedroom door to make sure it didn't squeak. Closing the door, he eyed the apple in his hand, deciding whether or not to just eat it here and now when he heard a faint noise. The strange feeling came back at full force and he instantly scanned the room to make sure his human wasn't in any danger. Sure, he wasn't on Kira or L's side, but what fun would come out of having Light dead? The room was found to be empty and he tilted his head to the side in confusion.

He shrugged it off a moment later and walked this time to the edge of Light's bed. He contemplated where to stash his prize when he heard the noise again, but this time it was a bit louder. The ruffle of sheets was heard and he turned to look at his human who seemed distressed. Light's eyes were tightly closed and sweat beads formed at the top of his forehead. He appeared to be twitching and every so often he made that soft noise which was neither a groan or whimper, but something in between. He was fascinated by this. Never had he seen Light like this fore he kept his mask of calm on all day except for that rare moment when something shocked him or pissed him off severely.

However, he had never seen his human so…so flustered. Light gave another weird noise and kicked his legs before tossing over in his sleep. The human's teeth were also gritted and he assumed something terrible must have been happening in Light's dreams. What could have been happening, well he had no idea, but like hell he was going to miss the opportunity to see this side of his human especially when it was so interesting. [1]

He sat on the edge of Light's bed and ignored the apple in his hands for once.

The clicking grew more constant and louder. Chills ran down his spine, but he refused to show any sign of weakness. Shudders racked his body and the clicking just got closer and closer. He stood his ground and bravely stayed still as he awaited the approaching doom he was sure to encounter. A shadow began to creep its way into his line of vision and he clenched his fists at his sides. He heard one dramatic click that reverberated off the walls and then suddenly the clicking had stopped. He looked in front of him and into the darkness and he could make out a figure of a person if he squinted.

He heard an intake of breath and a light appeared out of nowhere. It was small and only revealed half of the person's face. Brown eyes met his own and blond hair was revealed in the embrace of the light. [2] The eyes were fierce and determined. He knew he had seen this face before and it was right of the tip of his tongue, but he just couldn't quite place it. Then, the light seemed to turn all the way on and revealed the person entirely. Black lace, blond pigtails, and inch high black heels. The clicking had been the tap of the aforementioned heels on the floor of the darkened room. Only one person he knew dressed so atrociously.

"Misa." he said.

A twist and a turn. A moan or a groan. Light's behavior became predictable after a while, but still he watched on. The apple lay in his hands, abandoned for now. Yellow eyes followed every movement the mortal made and covered ears strained to pick up every sound. He didn't know why he was so concerned with intently watching this display of weakness by his human. Perhaps because his human was supposed to be a God and Gods don't appear vulnerable. Or maybe he just wanted to see this one time just to know that Light was human and not an immortal as he desperately wanted to be.

Lips quivered and he leaned in to see if Light would say anything. A few mumbles or perhaps growls escaped the youth's mouth before he said a very clear word that was laced with malice.


He blinked and wondered what his little God could be dreaming of that flustered him so. Misa wasn't that much of a problem for him was she?

Misa didn't say a word, but stared him down. Her eyes were unmoving and her limbs stayed perfectly still. He swallowed a lump in his throat before he heard her speak.


He remained still as well, but gave a slight nod as if to acknowledge her.

Shadows swirled next to Misa's left and he elegantly raised a brow at them. Misa continued to only look at him when suddenly the shadows took on the shape of a human. The silhouette was small and had curves so, he assumed it was a woman and his assumption was right. The shadows circled one another and then burst into life. He narrowed his eyes and watched as the shadows changed into a person or a girl to be more specific. She had a trim figure and short, brown hair. She wore pants and a jacket, but he could care less about her clothes.

What he did care about, was the gag in her mouth and the rope that bound her wrists and ankles together. Her eyes shifted from one side of the room to another before the orbs settled on himself. They widened and she tried to speak, but it came out as a few mumbles that were incoherent. Misa still refused to take her eyes off himself. The girl squirmed and wiggled to try and escape, but the binds were too strong for her, however she did not give up.

Misa finally moved. She extended her arm out towards the girl beside her, but her eyes remained focused on him.

"Do you remember this girl?" she asked plainly.

His eyes narrowed as he stared at the girl bound on the ground by Misa's feet. A remember of a few months prior came to mind. He had just gotten the Deathnote and L had sent agents out to follow the Kira suspects. His genius plan to get the agent who was following him to give him his name had succeeded, but that plan had to be set up and he had required some assistance. He took a girl out to Spaceland that day and the girl bound on the floor looked a lot like her. What was her name again? Yuze? Yuzu?

"Yuri." he said as the name slipped off his tongue. [3]

Misa twitched at the mention of the name while Yuri looked overjoyed that he had remembered her. Her eyes sparkled and she stopped squirming. However, her joy was cast aside as Misa cracked a devilish smile. Her red lips twisted and her eyes ignited with something that he couldn't recognize. She let out a bone-chilling laugh and Yuri shuddered. He kept his composure, but he knew something bad was going to happen. He could feel in it in the air as it swirled around him.

"So you do remember her. Misa doesn't like that though. Misa-Misa doesn't like that at all."

The way Misa talked in third-person made her voice sound all the more creepier and fresh tears made it down Yuri's face. Misa lifted her hand up in the air and the shadows moved to it, circling around in the air above her hand. They moved so fast that he grew a bit dizzy looking at them. The shadows took a shape eventually and turned into a Deathnote or more specifically, Misa's Deathnote. She flipped it open and more shadows drifted over to her free hand to from a pen. She clicked it and stuck the point of the pen to the paper, letting it bleed through.

"When she's gone, Misa-Misa can have you all to herself! We'll be happy together!"

She went to write the girl's name and he felt his lips quiver.

"Stop!" he yelled and Misa's eyes widened at his outburst.

He clenched his fists and swallowed.

"Don't do this, Misa. If you do, L will know I'm Kira. You don't want that do you?"

Her eyes shifted left and right before landing on him once more.

"Misa wants us to be happy and this girl is the way!" she proclaimed as she went to write Yuri's name again.

"If you kill her, I'll kill you." he stated with venom in his voice.

This made her hand stop moving and her eyes grew wide. Tears welled in the corner of her eyes. She appeared conflicted now and he internally cheered. He had her right where he wanted her. Then, out of the darkness behind Misa came a white hand that placed itself on her shoulder. Misa's eyes turned to look at the hand and then up where a face had now emerged.

"Remu…" she whispered and his heartbeat grew frantic.

Damn that shinigami! [4]

"Go ahead and kill her Misa because he dares even to move, I'll kill him first."

Panic rose in his body and this time he couldn't push it down. It overtook him and he couldn't think straight, but he doubted he could get out of this situation. He was trapped and now all he could do was stand and watch as Misa wrote Yuri's name down. The pen stopped moving and time stood still as all four of them waited for the forty seconds to end. In the background, he swore he heard the ticking of a clock, but to be honest it was probably his imagination. The ticking increased in speed until it struck the last second and at that point Yuri jolted up and screamed before her eyes glazed over and she fell to the floor, dead. Misa giggled and kicked the limp body.

"Aren't you glad she's gone, Light?" she said with a genuine smile.

Remu smirked at him from behind her and he felt like screaming. She had directly disobeyed his orders and that shinigami had screwed up all his plans. Now Yuri lay dead a few feet away and there was nothing he could do to bring her back. His breath hitched as he felt cool air travel down his neck. Behind him, someone grabbed his wrist. He felt cool metal touch his skin and then he heard a faint click. He found his hands to be bound behind his back.

"Yes, Light-kun. Aren't you glad she's gone?" came a masculine voice in his ear.

He turned his head to see L standing behind him.

"You are under arrest, Yagami-kun. You have been found guilty of being Kira and killing thousands."

A cold sweat ran down his neck and he let his mask crumble as he gave a scream of defeat, frustration, and anger.

He watched the human writhe and the sweat sheen on his body. His hair was no longer its perfect shape or lust, but was sticking out in all different directions and look tangled. The sheets were crumpled around him revealing parts of the young man here and there. He gulped in his slumber. He twiddled with the apple in his hands, but he was not bored yet. No, he would continue watching because what a show this was turning out to be. And all the shinigami had said the human world and humans were boring! He chuckled at the irony and watched as Light kicked his feet. A moment ago he had whispered a name, but even his perk ears hadn't been able to pick up what the boy had said. Light stayed still for a while, but gave out heavy pants.

He eyed his apple and was deciding whether or not to have dinner with his show when Light gave a rather violent jerk and caused him to float up and off the bed, startled. His black wings flapped in the air above the teen and his yellow eyes scanned his surroundings to get his bearings. Once he was sure there was no danger in the room, he floated down and landed on the wooden floor with a slight tap. Light's breathing became heavier and his eyes were squeezed shut even tighter if that was possible. His mouth parted and he looked so disheveled.

Suddenly, the teen gave a terrifying shriek that was loud enough to frighten the shinigami. Never had he heard Light yell like this except that one time when L had shown himself to Light and he got so frustrated. However, that was a scream of fury; this was a scream of fear. The two were very different and it shocked him to see his human like this. The scream had caused him to instinctively open his wings and fly back to where his wings almost scraped the window. They gave big, ominous flaps as he stayed afloat. [5]

Light's scream faded slowly and he went back to tossing and turning in his sleep. He was surprised the teen hadn't woken himself up. He was also shocked that no one in the boy's family had come rushing up the stairs to see if their son or brother was alright. Maybe they were just heavy sleepers or maybe they were used to the occasional terrifying nightmare. In any case, there was no rushing up the steps or pounding on the door. He sighed to himself and folded his wings back up to land on the floor once more. He cursed when he saw his fresh apple lying on the floor, no doubt having a brown spot on it now from being thrown.

Just as L was about to whisk him away, the shadows circled beneath his feet. They swirled around him and suddenly they were all gone. Misa, Remu, L, and even the late Yuri. Tentacles of darkness crawled their way up his body and found their way to the handcuffs on his wrists. They covered the metal making it turn a black color before they shattered open into millions of small shards. The tentacles slithered their way back down to the floor and continued their spinning. He rubbed his chaffed wrists and stared down into the never ending rotation of the shadows.

He felt dizzy suddenly and then the tentacles rose back up and engulfed his whole body. He gasped and then fell through the floor that the shadows had been circling. He felt himself falling only for a brief second. The wind stung his eyes and he closed them. When he opened them, he was standing and no longer falling. He ran his palms over his body to make sure nothing was broken or missing. All of his limbs were still with him and he sighed in relief when a screech pounded on his eardrums.

Covering his ears, he looked around to discover he was in L's headquarters. He stood behind L, who was sitting in an office chair in that weird way of his, and also in front of him was a computer monitor. L was watching the monitor intently and he wanted to know what was on it, but L was blocking his view. Another scream filled the small room and he cringed. L seemed unaffected by it however and simply turned around to see who was behind him.

"Ah, Yagami-kun. It's nice to see you here. We've made a breakthrough in the case."

His blood rose in his veins at what L had said.

"A breakthrough, you say?"

"Yes. As it so happens, there is a Third Kira. Her name is Kuro Shi."

His eyes widened and his breath hitched. Now, she's gone and gotten herself caught, but how?

"A detective in Chiba gave us the tip I believe his name was Usuki."

His fists clenched by his sides and he shook with fury. Of course he would betray us. He's a cop. I don't even know why I trusted him. Maybe it was because the way Kuro trusted him. I bet she feels even more betrayed. Her best friend of more than a decade turned her in. She'll stay strong though. They couldn't have possibly found the Deathnote or anything to trace her back to being the Third Kira…could they?

Light's cool returned and he stuffed his hands in his pants pockets and appeared indifferent to the whole thing.

"How do you know she's the Third Kira?" he asked nonchalantly.

"We found this." said L and he held up a black notebook in his hands.

Once again his mask was shattered as he read the scribbled, white kanji on the cover of the notebook.

Her Deathnote!

L set it on the desk and began flipping the pages that were filled with the names of criminals and sinners.

"All the evidence we need to convict her is right here, but we still need her help." he said as he closed the notebook and left it sitting on the desk.

All kinds of thoughts, schemes, and ideas were occupying his mind with this new information and he was dazed when he asked L his question.

"Her help?"

"Yes. We need her to give us the identities of both Kira and the Second Kira. We know she's met both by the amount of struggle she's put forth in not telling us anything."


"We even offered her leniency if she told us their identities, yet she saw right through our bluff."


"I've had to resort to-"

L was interrupted by another shriek of pain that now sounded slightly feminine. L sighed.

"Uncanny measures."

His mind finally made sense of everything.

They had captured Kuro and now she was…

Another pain filled cry.

He walked over to stand beside L and looked at the computer monitor. Just as he had suspected, Kuro was bound with fabric and blindfolded. She was naked and hanging in the air by her bound wrists. She was sobbing quietly and he could see the rope had burned her wrists to the point that her skin was mangled. Her once beautiful black hair was now a greasy, tangled mess and her feminine curves had been turned into straight lines. He could even start to see her ribcage probably because L had refused to feed her until she told him their names.

Fury lit inside himself and he cringed when he saw the torture she as being put through. He couldn't see who was doing it, but every few seconds she would be sprayed with water that seemed to be coming out of a hose. Judging by her screams, he knew it was scorching hot water and with that kind of pressure, it was enough to make any person burn and literally have their skin washed away. He swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat.

"How long…how long has this been going on?" he whispered.

L's eyes stayed glued to the screen as he answered.

"Five hours." [6]

Her screams now sounded strained to his ears and he could see the red, burned skin all over her body. Her sobs grew louder and just when he thought she was about to lose it all, she stopped her crying and held her head high.

"C'mon, L! I know you can do better than this! Put me into the brazen bull already! I made a vow to my God and nothing you do will make me break it!" she screeched before her voice gave out and she exploded into a fit of coughing.

He resumed his spot on the bed after his mortal had stopped screaming. Now Light lay oddly stilled in his sleep. Not even his breathing was hitched anymore. It was as if he had calmed himself down. After a few minutes of the calm however, he grew bored. This was how Light slept every night. The only reason he had been watching was to see his human at his weakest, but now that moment seemed to have passed and along with it, his fun. He sighed and ran his thumbs over the now bruised apple. He supposed he should eat it now. After all, it wouldn't be as delicious with that bruise.

He took a small bite out of the apple and chewed it with less enthusiasm as before. His apple was ruined and he no longer was entertained and it was only 4:00am. Light wouldn't be up for another two hours. He groaned out loud when he heard the faintest noise. A small, strained gasp. He turned to Light and saw his face scrunch up and a strand of his auburn hair fell down to his face and stuck there with the layer of sweat that had collected on his forehead. He took another small bite out of his apple and continued to observe his human.

He clenched and unclenched his fists. His head snapped to the other side violently and he cheered internally. Things were heating back up and this show looked even more interesting.

He couldn't begin to fathom this. His mind had literally melted. Why did she continue with the torture and humiliation? Did he really mean that much to her? Was he truly a God in her eyes? Or maybe she actually believed she was a Goddess and couldn't die? And then there was Misa. Why couldn't she tell them Misa's identity?

Because if they capture Misa she'll surely tell L my name.

He still had no idea why she would risk her life for him. There were just too many reasons in his mind. He shuddered as another ear-splitting scream came from the desktop speakers and he knew L had asked the person to turn up the heat or water pressure. He was too overloaded at the moment. He couldn't think of anything to get out of this situation just like a few moments ago. Realization suddenly struck.

I could kill her.

Toss and turn. Kick and groan. Violently jerk. This became Light's pattern. He had almost finished the apple when Light let out a whimper. Never had he thought he would get to hear Light of all people whimper. He twirled the core of the apple in his hand before eating it whole. He tapped his fingers lightly against his knee as he chewed the hard core. Light gave a rather fierce kick and managed to hit him in the knee. He didn't mind since it didn't really hurt, but he was starting to get a bit worried over his human. From his knowledge, nightmares typically didn't last this long nor were this intense.

Maybe I should wake him up…

He decided against it for now.

One simple scribble of her name in the piece of Deathnote in his wallet would be all it would take. Two short words. But he couldn't do it. He wasn't sure why, but the thought of killing her just hurt. She was his Goddess. How could he kill her? However, technically he was killing her now. He was the reason she was being stubborn and not giving up Kira's identity. His head throbbed from the amount of thinking he was doing, but he ignored it for now. He had to think because he would get out of this situation somehow.

"How long are you going to do that? She'll work up a resistance sooner or later." he said to L to try and make him stop the torture and give him a bit longer to think.

"Give it another hour. She seems to be breaking."

He clenched his teeth and a deep scowl etched its way on his face. Another powerful jet of water struck Kuro and she let out a wail that was gradually losing its power. Her voice was becoming strained and soon she wouldn't even be able to scream in pain.

"Are you feeding her?" he asked, but he already knew the answer.

"We are giving her as little nourishment as possible. We can't kill her."

He stared down at the floor and tried to think of anything that could get them out of this predicament. Killing her was not an option and L obviously wasn't going to stop this torture until he got some answers. He couldn't tell the police that L was torturing a Kira suspect because they would never believe him and L wasn't associated with the police anyway. He couldn't kill L because he didn't know his name. Light's eyes lit up.

I can kill L.

If he made the deal for the shinigami eyes right here and now he could see L's name and kill him once and for all. He'd have to make it look like an accident though so to not bring suspicion to himself. However, was he willing to throw away half of his life span for his Goddess? A God needed to live long to see his world prosper, but if his Goddess was still alive and he managed to get an heir before he died then his goal would be complete. Maybe it was a rash decision, but it was all he could think of right now as his thoughts were interrupted by Kuro's screams.

Light looked behind him and scanned the room for Ryuk, but found the shinigami to be nowhere in sight.

When I actually need him, he's not here!

"Ryuk!" he harshly whispered.

He was started to get bored again. The apple had been a nice little distraction, but Light wasn't being interesting anymore. He just kept making small noises every once and a while or tossing about. He had thought his human was going to keep him entertained, but he had remained calm after a while. It was slowly approaching 5am and there wasn't much he could do. He could try and sleep himself, but shinigami didn't have to sleep and he hadn't even attempted slumber in decades. He sighed and stood up to stretch his limbs, but he still felt bored. He walked around the room and even tried flying around it, but it became too repetitive and dull. He heard Light mumble under his breath for a few seconds, but couldn't quite catch what he had said. He flew over to the window and stared out at the darkened horizon. The moon gave some light to the world, but it was still quite dark.

If he looked to the east, he could see the faint tell-tale signs of the sun coming up. He placed his bony hand on the window pane and felt the cool rush it sent through him. There wasn't much to look at tonight. He chuckled as he remembered earlier events. It had been quite a shock to suddenly see Isamu and company outside the window.

He leaned against Light's desk behind him and sighed. Tonight sure had been interesting, but he wasn't at all amused by Remu's sudden appearance. The female shinigami irked him to no end and now she was making things difficult for everyone. He was feeling a bit stressed and prayed that Light would bring him an apple from downstairs. Suddenly, he heard a slight tapping and a string of curses from outside the window.

He turned his head to the side to see a familiar face at the window. Isamu's face was scrunched up in a valiant effort to lift two humans at once. He recognized Kuro, but the male he held, he did not. He laughed at their little performance as the shinigami tried to juggle the two of them. Kuro spit out mindless curses while the male seemed patient.

"And why couldn't I do one at a time?" Isamu whined and Kuro huffed.

"We wouldn't be fast enough if you carried us one at a time!" she yelled.

"Quiet!" the male whispered.

Isamu flapped his wings a bit harder and managed to keep the three of them afloat. He grunted and hoisted the two of them up so, they weren't slipping. Isamu huffed and looked through the window to see the other shinigami laughing at his labors.

"Don't just stand there! Open the window!" he yelled and was shushed by both humans.

He walked over to the window, chuckling all the way. He unhooked the locks and slowly lifted it open. Once the window was open, Isamu threw the two of them in and grabbed onto the window pane to keep himself up as his wings gave out. The two humans screamed as they hit the wooden floor hard and tumbled inside. Isamu sighed from his perch and he burst into laughter.

"Looks like someone needs to exercise a bit more, ne?" he asked and erupted into more laughter.

Isamu sighed again and glared up at him.

"I'd like to see you lift up two humans at once."

Kuro and the other male cursed and rubbed the areas that hurt from their rough landing. Kuro was just about to tell Isamu off when they all heard the soft creaking of the stairs. Instantly, they knew Light was coming up and they couldn't allow him to see his team like this. He helped lift Isamu from the window and shut it softly when he managed to pull the shinigami through. Kuro and the male stood leaning on Light's desk and he pulled Isamu over to stand by him when they saw the door knob slowly turn. They checked each other over before Kuro nodded and plastered a smirk on her face.

At least they were able to work under pressure. [7]

He was interrupted from his reminiscing by a hoarse whisper that came from his little God.


To say he was shocked by his name was an understatement. He was downright startled. He turned around to see if maybe Light had woken up and had called his name, but upon turning around he saw the male was still asleep. Why had he been dreaming of himself? What could he possibly be doing in Light's nightmares? He wasn't that scary or at least compared to other shinigami he wasn't…but Light had freaked out when he first saw him. However, it was his first time seeing a shinigami. Any sane man would react that way. After that first encounter though, Light had never once feared him.

Light saw him as an equal now thanks to that Kuro girl or so he hoped. He hadn't made him do anymore seemingly impossible tasks or starve him of apples. Perhaps Kuro's equality was slowly making its way into Light's subconscious. Still, why would he appear in Light's nightmares? The way he had said his name, it sounded strained. It almost sounded like when Light would whisper for him to be quiet since there were other people around. Then an idea struck him.

What if he was calling out for help?

That thought seemed ridiculous, but there was that nagging suspicion of what if? What if Light was begging for his help in the nightmare and he refused to help him? What if Light was failing to become God and needed his help? Is that what he feared? That he wouldn't help him if he needed it? He rubbed his temples and tried to think clearly. He slid down to the floor so he was sitting below the window. One of his legs was up and he draped his arm over his knee. His other leg was stretched out and lying on its side. He could still see the sheets on Light's bed moving from his twisting.

He had to think about this. Would he help Light if he had to or leave him in the dust as it appeared he was doing in the teen's dream? He had said he wasn't on Kira or L's side, but now he felt like he had to choose one. He knew eventually he would have to kill Light, but he could still be on Light's side. He didn't particularly like L anyways. L wasn't as fun as Light and he doubted the detective would give him apples or even enjoy his company for that matter. Light did find him annoying at times, but apparently he needed him. He was either on the team or not. There was no sitting on the fence with this one.

He really liked being a part of the Kira team. Light gave him apples, Kuro seemed to enjoy his company, Isamu was one of his very good friends, and even Usuki seemed nice. The only downside to being on the Kira team was Misa and Remu, but he didn't think they considered those two to be a part of the team. The L team on the other hand consisted of L and a few people that he didn't know that well and he doubted they would think of him as Light and the others did. His only logical option seemed to be to side with Kira which he couldn't really see what was so wrong with that. Light had picked up his Deathnote after all…but the thought of being a part of someone's team and then having to kill them didn't appeal to him.

Perhaps it appealed to Light though. He really wanted to help Light if he needed him. Could he really watch Light fail after everything that he had gone through? That Kuro had gone through? He made his decision then and there. He was going to be a part of Kira's team because he wanted to help Light and he refused to watch him crumble when he had come so far.

"What was that, Yagami-kun?" asked L has he brought his thumb up to his lips.

The shinigami was nowhere to be found and didn't appear to respond to his call.

"Nothing," he responded and then quickly added, "May I leave the room? I don't particularly wish to watch this."

L didn't answer his question for a while and his hopes shattered when he finally did.

"I think you need to stay in here for now. You are a Kira suspect and if watching this girl which you have no relation to be tortured is unsettling then I have reasons to suspect you are Kira even more. You don't know this girl do you?" he asked without looking at him.

He gritted his teeth and managed to say no.

L nodded and then went back to watching the computer monitor. Without Ryuk around to do the shinigami eye deal with, he had no plan. He couldn't get out of this room, he couldn't make L stop, and he couldn't kill L or Kuro. He was trapped once more. He was started to get overloaded with these thoughts of failure. He had failed to protect his team, himself, and the new world he was building. He wasn't suited to be a God, if he was trapped like this for the second time. What right did he have to rein over this new world when he couldn't even protect himself and his team? What right did he have to become a God now?

Thoughts buzzed around his head at the speed of light and he couldn't figure out what he was going to do. He was stuck. Trapped. Cornered. He had rarely ever been cornered before. And even when he was, he had always managed to crawl his way out of a jam, but right now he just couldn't. This whole thing seemed impossible. Maybe it was because he wasn't thinking clearly or because he was trying to make rash decisions, but right now he couldn't clear his head to think of a reasonable solution. He wanted to break down and scream again like he had done moments ago when Misa had gotten him caught.

The urge grew stronger by the second and Kuro's screams of pain didn't help to clear his mind. They fueled his anger and defeat. He had failed to defend her. He had failed to look after himself. He had failed to keep Misa in line. And he had failed to think of way to get out of this situation. He was just a failure deep down, wasn't he? Oh, he had thought he could become God and make up for his failure, but he couldn't. In his effort to succeed, he had brought down many people with him this time. People who had had lives before Kira. Who had potential. He had done all this and now it was high time for himself to suffer. Kuro shouldn't be taking this pain. He should have been!

L suspected him first! Not her! L had seen through his act since the very beginning when he had killed Lind L. Tailor out of rage. He should have given up there. Maybe then Kuro would have lived a better life, but it was too late to take it all back now. The only he could do now was…


His eyes lit up. That was the solution. He was a God and Gods helped the people. He would suffer for his people. He would surrender to L and be the bigger man. He would become a God. He smirked.


The man at the computer didn't turn around, but he knew he had heard him. He walked up behind the male and placed a hand on his shoulder.

Ah, sweet, sweet revenge.

"I am Kira." [8]

With his new resolve, he was ready for anything. He felt renewed and courageous. He stood from his spot of the floor and looked over to Light. The tossing and turning had returned, but it was nowhere near as bad as it had been. He dusted himself off and reclaimed his spot on the edge of the bed. Light groaned out as he sat down and he stared down at the youth.

"Do not worry, my little God. I will always be there to help you."

He could feel L's eyes widened at his statement. Weren't expecting that were you, L? The urge to laugh out in victory and arrogance gripped him and so he did laugh. His laugh echoed off the walls of the small room and what was meant to be a small laugh of victory turned into a hysterical rave. He couldn't stop and he let go of L's shoulder as he kneeled over. His laughing lessened for a moment.

"You were right all along, L."

Kuro gave another wail and Light resumed his mindless cackling. He stood to his full height and threw his head back and just laughed. Perhaps he had gone mad with power, but now was no time to think of that. He had to celebrate his hard fought victory.

Light tossed and turned a bit more now and every few seconds he made a mewling noise that sounded a bit odd coming from Light's mouth. He wasn't sure if he should wake Light up though. It was 5:30am now and he would be up in 30 minutes, but he was still worried about this nightmare. For one it seemed to be pretty intense judging from earlier in the night and secondly, the nightmare shouldn't have lasted this long. It had been a good few hours and Light was still under the nightmare's clutches. He pondered whether he should wake him up or not when he saw Light crack a devilish smile in his sleep. This confused him to no end. Wasn't Light in the middle of a nightmare? Why was he smiling? The smile wasn't a genuine smile however. It was more of a smirk than anything.

Either his nightmare had suddenly turned into a wonderful dream or he had defeated the fear in his nightmare once and for all. He would have liked to think it was the latter when Light began chuckling. It was a soft chuckling that could barely be heard, but it was still off-putting. His chuckling got louder and eventually he was straight up laughing in his sleep. He watched with interest. Light was such an unpredictable and odd character. It was what made the teen interesting and fun to be around. However, sometimes like now, he seemed a bit insane and overwhelmed by the magnitude of power that the Deathnote gave him.

Light soon stopped laughing and continued smirking in his sleep and he continued his watching.

L never turned around to look at him or even tried to apprehend him. He continued his laughing and didn't notice that the room around him was slowly turning into darkness. The computer monitor and L vanished and the once painted walls turned to blocks of black. The room was now as it had been when he was with Misa. He never stopped laughing. Even when the shadows engulfed him once more.

His laughter finally ceased when he couldn't hear it anymore. He opened his eyes, which he had closed during his little episode. His vision was hazy and he could see red spots in the corners of his eyes. He was lying down and the world around him was in black and white except for the red in his vision. His head throbbed and he felt a pressure in his chest. Kneeling beside him, sat Kuro who had tears running down her cheeks. She looked like she always had. No bruises, no red marks, and she looked well-fed.

This put his mind at ease for a moment. He had saved her. She was still here. He found it odd thought that he couldn't hear her sobs. All he heard was this ringing in his ears. Her sobs became more violent or so he thought as she shook with fury. His vision flickered for a moment and it sent his mind reeling. Something nagged him telling him he didn't have much time left. He grabbed Kuro's wrist with his right hand and shook her to make her look at him. Her blue eyes were wide and filled with tears. He must have been saying something because she appeared to be listening and taking in every word.

His left hand moved down to his chest and opened his jacket. The left side of his jacket was down sprawled on the ground, open. If it was even possible, Kuro's eyes grew larger and more tears drifted down her face. He pulled her closer and wiped away her tears with his thumb. He patted her cheek and she brought her hand up to caress his own. Her lips quivered and her eyes narrowed as violent sobs wracked her body. She nodded quickly and gasped out. His vision grew black around the corners. He moved his lips to smile at her and she used her free hand to grab whatever had been in his jacket.

She pulled it up and he saw it was his own Deathnote. His vision was getting darker and darker by the second. However, all at once his hearing was restored. He heard her sobs and the sounds of yelling men. She held the Deathnote to her chest with one hand and held his own with the other.

"Where did he go?!" a familiar voice yelled and Kuro nodded her head once more.

"I know what I must do, My Lord. I accept." she said with a small smile.

He returned the gesture.

His vision was so black that he could only see her smiling face. With his last breath he said,

"I give ownership of my Deathnote to Kuro Shi, my Goddess."

Tears flowed freely down her face as she clutched the Deathnote and gripped his hand.

"We have to go!" came an unfamiliar voice and through the darkness he saw a male.

The male had long, black hair and eyes that shined with a tint of red. He put his hands on Kuro's shoulder and told her to leave once more before looking down at him.

"I'll take care of her, my liege." he said and he pulled her up.

Her hand slid out of his and she sobbed again. The Deathnote was placed in her own jacket and she blew him a kiss before the two of them ran off in another direction.

"I think I found him!" yelled someone else.

The darkness now completely covered his vision and his hearing was gone again. The pressure on his chest tightened and he felt like the muscle was twisting itself. His head pounded with renewed fury and he felt myself coughing. He thought he had spit up, but it felt warm on his lips. He honestly didn't care at the moment though. Something in the back of his mind was telling him all had gone according to plan and he could peacefully slip into the darkness, which he did.

It all came to him so fast. One moment he had been blissfully unaware and the next he was jolted awake. He sat up rather roughly and gasped. He gripped the sheets tight as he tried to understand what was real and what wasn't. He panted for breath and tried to calm down.

"Are you alright, Light?"

He took in several deep breaths and then looked up to see Ryuk sitting on the edge of his bed and looking at him with concern in his eyes.

"I think so." he said and he rubbed his forehead.

"You were having a pretty intense nightmare there."

His eyes widened as realization struck him.

It had all been a bad dream. A horrifying dream.

All of his worst fears had come alive in that dream. Misa getting them all caught, Kuro being captured, Usuki betraying them all, and having to surrender to L in order to save Kuro. The last part of the dream though…he wasn't sure what that had been about. It had been different than the other parts. He didn't even want to begin to decipher it however. He needed to calm down and shove that dream into the recesses of his mind to never be brought up again. He looked over at his digital clock and saw that it was 5:45am. He would have to get up and get ready for school in fifteen minutes so there was no point in going back to sleep.

He pushed the covers off his chest and stretched his arms. Ryuk was looking at him the whole time and he raised a brow at the shinigami.

"What is it, Ryuk?" he asked.

"I wanted to tell you that I've decided to join the Kira team."

Light placed his arms back at his sides and smiled at Ryuk.

"Great. I suppose you'll tell me L's name now?" he asked with a smirk as he stood and went over to his closet to get some clothes for the day.

Ryuk's yellow eyes widened and he stuttered.

"W-w-w wait, Light-o! I didn't think this all through!"

Light could only laugh. [9]

[1] Humans are supposed to be fun~

[2] I wasn't sure about her eye color. I couldn't remember if it was brown or green so, if I'm wrong please tell me.

[3] It took me ages to find her name so, be grateful she wasn't just a random girl.

[4] Nobody likes Remu in this fic…

[5] His scream must have been pretty high-pitched to have frightened a shinigami.

[6] I'm no doctor or anything, but this amount of time seems reasonable. I don't know. If you have any preference please tell me.

[7] I felt the need to add that little tidbit. A little humor in between the horror, ne?

[8] Ah revenge is sweet. I wish he would have whispered that to L as he died.

[9] And more humor~

Author's Note: Woah, you guys. This chapter is longer than anything I've ever wrote for fanfiction toppling at an 8,553 words! You guys are so lucky. I hope the massiveness of this chapter makes up for my two week delay. Only two more weeks of school left so, except more updates!

RQOTD: How was the nightmare?

See any messages? Think it was the best thing ever? Did it scare you?

Leave me your answer in a PM or review!

*Cries at the magnitude of the chapter*