I'm a disclaimer to own One Piece and all its characters.

One random night at some godforsaken hours in the late night Shanks had found some poor soul to interview and question about the world they lived in; pretty much he was drunk, bored, and feeling the need to hear something humorish.

A transponder snail was broadcasting the interview live from an unknown location in a bar where Shanks had gotten his poor guest drunk enough for almost anything. He finished five more bottles of grog before Buggy the clown signaled to him that the show was about to start. "Alright well heeeerree we goooo". Shanks smirked. "Ready to begin Marco"? Said Phoenix had been starting another bottle of vodka when the little light on the snail lit up.

"Hello to everyone watching this, and I'd like to take this chance to say hi to a very special girl out there," Shanks stated. "Mom don't worry I'll be home tomorrow, and this time with cake. Anyway Marco do you have any girl out there you have an interest in"? Marco grinned, "Yeah I get a boner every time I see Bonney". The clown behind the camera toppled over with complete laughter as the two drunks paid him a glance and went back to their talk.

"Well what do you think whenever you see T. Law"? He questioned. "I think of the time he told me how to get a girl, but after a few sentences I smacked him". Marco sighed. "The man needs to learn how to lay down his own damn name when around women. Alas, I can say that there's a reason he has to; he doesn't have much…." He gestured vaguely to his genitals and all three men burst out with laughter.

"So to get on with the conversation I must ask if you would ever think of getting married". Shanks asked. "Me married; sure in a total penthouse living large in a big city with twin boys named Dog and Dawg". Marco said. "Although I would really just want to stay a single guy, besides a lot of ladies out there want a chance with the fiery bird of love".

"How would you feel if Gecko Moria stole your shadow and what would you do after he stole it"? Shanks asked, and then popped his beer back in his mouth. He laughed, "First I'd be like totally pissed off, second I'd chill out with the fact, and then after that I would just thank him. It would give me a better chance to pick up girls for letting them think I'm a Vampire". An unmanly snort was heard from behind the camera by Buggy who was now becoming drunk as well.

"Hey what would you do to solve world hunger"? Shanks spoke up. "Give them Bonney supply of pizza; I'm dead serious the woman always has the gooey stuff lying around". Marco smirked. "Sometimes it lies around on certain locations in my thoughts". "Shanks he's getting a boner"! Buggy yelled. "I can sense those things man"! Both men shot the clown a WTF and TMI look and went back to their topic.

"If you could have anyone in the world who would it be"? Shanks questioned. The very next second the camera was cut off as Marco roughly locked his lips with those of the red head's and began to remove his belt. Buggy, who had been on the floor for the past few moments, stood up to see the two men without shirts and ran out of the building when he heard a groan; what happened after that was a total mystery.

Well this story turned into something else pretty quick. Ah well you can call it a crack fic or an interview gone completely wrong doesn't matter. R&R if you would please!