I am reading Brewdening Love, one of the My Immortal like fics by Erin –Of-The-Cullen-Clan. As I Twilight fan, this story makes sane Twilight fans look like Twitards.

I see this as a companion fic to my Twilight Reads 'Brewdening Love' series.

Note: I am a Twi-hard, but Twi-haters are welcome to read and review.

Hope you stay with me through this

Sample- Erin's slop

Sample-My Words

Sample- My Randomness

Sample-How I wish things could have gone instead

Chapter One: Genesis (Like the first book in the Old Testament in the Bible?)

Erin: ok hello everyone I want to let you knwo that I'm the BIGGEST Twilight ever! (I am a Twilight fan too, but not as much as I was when I really got into it) I've read all the boks and seen da movie -OMFG isn't Cullin HAWT (Edward may be good looking, but there is more to him then looks). So hot. ok now iv writon a storie about wut wold happen id I were bella (Self-insertion?)1 Because shes a dirte bithc (Bella is not like that. You are just like the author of Forbiden Fruit: Wanting to demonize Bella so your compete and total Mary Sues can be with Edward)so i want you to see it and tel moi what you think! So LOTS OF REVOWS PLZ! lov you God xoxoxoxo

I walked into the room and HE waz siting over by the coner of my english class, prefectly sitting by the corner in a desk (Copying Twilight much, but instead it is English class?). I thought he was a god (Erin: not god God because I luv god and thats blamsphemi, so fuc off sinars (Sorry to contradict you, but if you are a real Christian, there is only one God. Of course, it is another term for perfect. As a real Christian, you wouldn't say the 'f' word)) becoz he looked so darmn hot, like that guy who used to be on Smalvile befor he got fat so now I watch supernatural becoz fat man is always in my head now (He is not fat).

I giglied when he lookd at mwah and Edwards looked away seeming to snarlingly (It is because he likes Bella). I flacked my long brown hare hoppping to git his atention. I hav long brown hair that reatches my btomm, in a smooth long thing with a hairclip and such (We didn't need that much detail, sweetie). I have hotr eyeliner with lots of blue mascara becoz it goes with moi eyes you see becoz they are blu. and i'm wearing a loose wite blows (A blouse, you mean)with a cute leather belt and a long black skirt becoz its sexy but not whory and its a sin to be a whor tunles ur Mary Magdalin, but shes daed anyway.

Edward looked back to me and loked away agin (He is probably hoping you get away). It was rood and I farroed my brow confusedly at hymn, but decided but hes sex-ah so Ill let him get away with it (You just like Edward for his looks) (The Lord teeches us to forgave (Honey, God wants us forgive EVERYONE. Not just hot people)).

I walked over, with evry eye on the room on me because Im so darmn H-O-T (Mary Sue alert!) (I've been told this mnay times so I know it is true( and i sit on his desk and he looks up and has bronze eyes that are sexy in a brewding way (erin: FORSHADOWING! He is brewdy but if you havnt reed the boks you'd already no that (How lame!)!)

He looks up to me and I look dwn to him loking up to me. He then speaks, in a quiet brewding voice.

"Who are you?" he aks and why are you on my desk? (See, he just wants Bella)

So i winks at him and tell him he's cute, but then class starts and i sit down and watch him (Hey, your grades are important).

He is so hot and I dcide want to be his boyfriend (Girl friend, you mean. How shallow are you? You are not a true Christian like you say you are). He looks at me and turns away agin.


So yeeeeeeeah thats my storie tell me what you hink with your revieows! so glad to have writing it i'm happi ass now! GOD LOVES YOU ALL! XOXOXOXOXO! :3

This is the first chapter and I feel as if my IQ dropped o.5 points.