AUTHOR'S NOTES: Yikes! Please don't eat me, Fire Emblem fandom! This is my first (but definitely not my last - oh, stop groaning!) Fire Emblem fic, so please be nice. Praise, comments and reviews, all are accepted, bu-u-ut... flames will only be used to cook stuff around here.

Also: Wallace = italicized, Vaida = bolded


Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
You are an ugly cobra.
I hate you.

You have the appearance of a muskrat
and the eyes of a snake.
Your personality isn't special either-
i.e., dry as a bran flake.

Now, what is that I see?
In the endless sky, a lump of flesh,
Grey and rotting, smelling of onions,
Not household onions - onions picked fresh.

And your wyvern isn't much better!

Oh, you're one to talk!
Many find your rusty armor,
all grey and dank,
not nearly as shiny as your head!
For that, you've your bald scalp to thank!

Atop my Umbriel I flew,
who ever knew I'd run into you,
slowly, agonizingly, one by one,
you poked soldiers to death, but only a few!

Your movements were slow,
your wit not much better.
When those lords spot Umbriel hurting you,
they ask me to stop her, I say "let 'er!"

I only hope she remembers to chew!

You disgusting beast!
You dare insult me?
You have not yet begun to seethe,
after I'm done, you'll be so angry,
you'll forget how to breathe!

You ignorant woman (if I'm to call you as so)!
Clean out your ears and listen closely!
I'm General Wallace, knight of Caelin!
You just belch and screech and whine, morosely!

Wyvern General! I scoff!
You are as pretty and strong as a moth!
Your vile demeanor, ugly scar
(What?),
all add up to a person as thrilling as cloth!

And it's been my greatest displeasure to know you!

You bald, old fossil! (Fossil?)
You think you're any better?
Armor like teapots, skull thick as stone,
whenever you say anything,
your words fall to low groans!

You are boring!
Whatever you say is not more interesting if it's louder!
You are annoying!
Your personality is as substantial as powder!

You should know better than to insult me,
those who harass me wind up as food,
to the snapping jaws of Umbriel,
but you'd jsut upset her stomach, making her brood.

You say displeasure? You know not MY agony!

It appears now,
we are at a stalemate.
Neither side will give,
neither side will yield,
for now, both of us shall live.

However! We are not done.
This shall not be settled until someone has won!

And it shall be I! General Wallace! Bwahaha!

...He's finally gone.
He says it won't be over until one has won?

It shall be I! Vaida!


Oh, my GOD! I actually wrote something not vomit-inducing! HOORAY! (Well, a lot of credit goes to a rhyming dictionary I used)

Here you are, Vaida/Wallace fans! And I'm not sure yet if I'll make more chapters... Tell me in a review, if you want to!

Whenever I write poetry, I start walking to the rythms of Dr. Suess. Ah, nostalgia...