Fandom: The Chronicles of Narnia – Prince Caspian [movie] by C.S Lewis

Summary: First loves are meant to hurt, but not like this. Caspian is haunted by the possibility of what could have been.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. All characters, settings, and proprietary language are owned by the author of the work from which this is derived.

Author's note: I love this movie, well, mostly because of Ben Barnes but I wanted to write something for a fandom other than Twilight and when Miraz said, "We telmarines have nothing that we've never taken", that was pretty much the prompt I needed.

As he gazed upon her sleeping form, he was wholly aware that their time together was slowly coming to an end. The army, led by his uncle, would arrive by dawn and win or lose; there was no way he could be with Susan. How could he? She was one of the Queens of old, destined to return to her own land when she fulfilled her duty to Aslan. If they were to triumph over Miraz, he would have his throne once again and he would need to rise to his rightful place as King. There was no way he could follow her to her land, not without abandoning his people and there was no way she would stay, not unless she wanted to leave her family. And if they lost, there was no doubt that Miraz would not take too kindly to traitors like Susan and him.

From the moment he laid eyes on her, he knew that the stories he was told, first by his Nurse and then by his professor, they were all true. Queen Susan the Gentle was known for her great beauty and even in those forbidden books that his professor managed to smuggle into the palace, her beauty in those pages was evident for all to see. He never thought he would actually meet her; even when he had blown her horn in his hour of need, he had assumed he would be meeting someone older, someone different.

Not her. No, he could never imagine meeting such a lady, a lady of impeccable grace, beauty and determination.

He had seen her anger when he had very nearly made an agreement with the White Witch. He wouldn't have gone through with it, but he had to admit, he was captivated with the idea. What if they could not win against Miraz? What would happen to them? What would happen to Narnia? But the look on her face was enough to deter him from ever having such thoughts again. He knew his actions were viewed upon as an act of betrayal but surely Susan would understand; that he wanted to protect them all even if his attempts were misguided.

He didn't dare go closer to Susan, not even in her sleep, not even to steal a quick kiss or a touch of her cheek. He was afraid that she might be a light sleeper and he was already on her bad side as it was. Still, as he made out her features in the glowing embers of the fire torches, he couldn't help but wonder at the possibility of them. He could rule Narnia with Susan by his side and have Peter, Edmund and Lucy in his counsel. Narnia would prosper; it would enter another Golden Age.

But no, Aslan would never agree. He seemed to be the one who decided who could stay in Narnia and from what Lucy told him, this would most likely end with the Pevensies returning to their homeland called "England". That is, if they survived Miraz first.

We telmarines have nothing that we've never taken. You can make Susan stay. You're king, order her to stay.

The thought came to him unbidden but he pushed it away almost instantaneously. His subconscious had taken what Miraz had once said and twisted it about but he knew Susan would never go for it. An independent, headstrong lady like her; she would sooner kill him than allow herself be bossed around.

He knew he would have to sleep soon; he would need to be well rested for the battle tomorrow but his heart continued to ache for what could have been. He closed his eyes and in his dreams, all he saw was a fair lady with dark hair and green eyes.