The Avengers Battle HYDRA at the Playground with Startling Regularity

By: Kim Hoppy

Disclaimer: Avengers, Iron Man, The Hulk, Iron Man 2, Thor, Captain America, etc. and all adjoining characters are the property of Marvel and those associated with their creation and are used without permission or disrespect.

A/N: ::headdesk:: This was honestly supposed to be a little, like, 10-page ditty at the most. Something to whip out on the weekend, and now a month later, and quite a few pages more, it's finished. It turned a little more plot-y than I intended, too, and perhaps more focused on the brotherly-relationship between Phil and Tony. Well, I tried, and it's finished.

Rated for some inappropriate language a teenager might say.

Summary: If asked, of course Tony is going to proclaim that he's reason they're all Avengers, he's the one who started it all. But the truth is, it was all Phil's fault. Most days, he doesn't regret it.

Or ... a story not so much about Avengers, but about two brothers who both like the Avengers film and experience the movies, in their own way.

Sometimes the Best Place to Start is at the End, Just So You Know What's Coming and That the Avengers Always Win. Even Though, Really, That's a Given

Fixing the sunglasses, Phil radiated authority and you will listen to me at the group of costumed superheroes in front of him. There was always hope that the suit might give him a little bit of a super power in herding this mess of cats, though experience told him it was unlikely. Still, he could at least hope today would be different, because this was going to turn into a nightmare of epic proportions otherwise, and he'd be the one having to clean it up.

"All right, is everyone ready?"

There was nodding and a lot of looks that said, we were born ready. He still checked with his eyes to make sure everyone had what they needed – hammer, shield, staff, bow and arrows, gun, bags and/or buckets – and was pleased to note so far it was good. There had already been drama when someone had misplaced someone's weapon.

Then his eyes caught movement. "Do not hit your brother with that hammer or I swear I will take it away!" he warned, and Thor pouted a little while Loki smirked. "And don't think I haven't see you poking and chasing people with that staff. The same goes for you."

"Phil! Come on!" Iron Man whined.

Phil ignored him out of practice. "Bathroom?" Because always ask. No one volunteered and he grinned. "All right, I guess we can roll out."

"That's Transformers!" Hawkeye protested, grinning like an idiot.

"You gotta say, Avengers Assemble, like this: Avengers Assemble!" Iron Man demonstrated at the top of his lungs.

"Technically, Captain America says that, because he's the leader," Phil said dryly. Captain America smirked.

"Well, it's okay, we can say it too, he'll totally let us, and because really, we're in charge, aren't we, so we get to say it because we're the ones who every listens to," Iron Man said.

Phil looked down his sunglasses. "No. You just think you are. I'm in charge."

"Then you gotta say it."

He sighed. It was going to be a long day, and all Phil had to say was they'd better get a good haul of candy.