Quote of the chapter:
"Being told the same lie a thousand times is easier to believe, than being told a truth you've never heard."
Lie-chan: 'Sup… couldn't really think of something to write, but I just HAD to write something; my fingers would not stop moving!
Ikuto: … Wow. You're really useless aren't you?
Amu: Now that's mean. At least she actually DOES work, unlike someone I know.
Ikuto: What's that suppose to mean?
Ikuto: Sure… -sudden mysterious gleam in eyes-
Amu: -backs away cautiously- Now we wouldn't want to do something r-right here, right Ikuto?
Ikuto: -silent but pounces Amu while dragging her off to some unknown place… poor Amu-
Lie-chan: … Well I guess it's back to me. -Goes to emo corner- I'm such a lonely kid… Might as well get started; here's the disclaimer -sigh-.
Disclaimer: Sadly enough I do not own Shugo Chara, nor shall I ever (unless something unexpected happens… XD). BUT! I do own the plot; and I do realize that this story may be similar to another story. (Sorry to tell you all but all stories have its similarities – Great minds think alike.)
- .t. - .t. -
Pink locks swirl, golden eyes gleam, pale skin breaks, crimson flows on-and-on; a river effect. Dropping innocently to the ground, unable to be heard over the screams, the screams silently pleading for help, for release. It won't stop, it can't be stopped. Futile attempts, rebelling against, ear-piercing screams, bloodied walls and hands, knives gleaming in the moonlit night. Too long…this has gone on for too long. She knows, but it can't be stopped, she can't get help it just won't work. She's tried it too many times before.
Glass breaks, shattering. More screams. More blood. More pain. Every time the reality of it sinks in deep; every time, deeper than before. "It'll end soon." She reassures herself. "They're running out of heat." She tries to convince herself. The lies get easier to tell and to believe every time; the truth fades. The pain becomes easier to bear. The emotions become easier to see, the disappointment gets easier to ignore.
"It's getting better." She tells herself. "My life is becoming easier, see? I don't have to deal with such petty emotions." She explains to a mirror, her own blank stare boring right back at her. Some days are good, while the rest just go dramatically wrong. She goes limp every time, 'it's no use to defy it.' She'll think. She wouldn't cry, she would only scream when it becomes overwhelming, only when it becomes too much will she break her vow of silence.
It's hard to think back, thinking back just causes more confusion, more pain. It was just useless to think about how it was before. When she would only cry when her pet died, or when she fell and scratched herself. When staring blankly or being silent meant she was distracted. When screaming meant she was scared of ghosts. When she would only shut herself in her room when she forgot to unlock the door. When bringing out a knife only meant that she was cooking. When… when it wasn't like this.
The screams end, the breaking stops, but the cutting won't. It becomes daily, it becomes fascinating. Being left on the ground waiting for the right amount of time to pass before she moves, she gets good at the timing, knowing what to do when and how to act in front of different people. When it's time to move she goes slowly, not caring if it makes a mess, it'll be cleaned up tomorrow. Going up the steps are easy, finally reaching her destination is harder. Breathing gets shallow, steps falter, hands shake, vision gets blurry; she stumbles into her temporary sanctuary. Locking the many lock she has behind her, she falls onto her bed resting for a little. Trying to gain her strength back.
Little by little it comes back; she rises and goes towards her desk. Many little cuts and indents had slowly found their way to this desk over the painstaking years of her life. It was such an insignificant object, yet it could still hold such importance to her. Opening the top left draw she found many different kinds of knives; over the years she had been learning how to fight by herself, she now knew how to handle a knife perfectly and how to take apart and put together any kind of gun in a couple of minutes. But those are in another drawer. She took out a knife that had been given to her, not given to hurt others, but given to protect. Ironic how that same knife is the one she uses to cut herself.
Taking a deep breath she brings the sharpness closer to the snow white skin on her wrists. The coldness makes her shiver, not knowing what to feel, she closes her eyes as she cuts deep down, slowly. Releasing her breath with emotions swirling in her, she reluctantly takes the blade away and cleans it. Putting it back where it belongs, she licks up the blood walking to the bathroom to get cleaned up and reading for tomorrow. Thinking about her any unseen cuts and scars she falls back upon her bed. Looking to her drawer where all her knives lay, she falls asleep, knowing that her only release will be cutting….
- .t. - .t. -
Lie-chan: God, I bet you all know who it is… Not like I was trying to hide it anyways.
Ikuto: I think you suck.
Amu: Me too.
Ikuto: -smirks- Oh? So my strawberry agrees with me? How 'bout you agree with me on another 'important' issue?
*They continue to banter in the back…*
Lie-chan: I think this one was a little short... I know that once I actually start writing the story it's kind of good; but sometimes as the chapters go on… I just – I don't know – get off 'topic'. I mean to me it'll make sense, but I sometimes confuse people… Of course I didn't mean on FF, cause this is my first story on here (it was going to be another one, but I'm having trouble actually trying to start it out ) –sigh- See? I'm off topic again…
Truth-san:(Aren't we the same person?) Well, anyways I hope you like it and then give me a review; I'm planning on getting like 2-5 reviews to continue this. I don't even care if one of those reviews says "F*ck you." As long as it is between 2-5 reviews then it goes on! So if you don't like then just leave this story alone. If there are any mistakes please tell (though I hope not, for I tried to edit this but hey I'm' only 12, give me a break).
Lie-chan: Oh! And check out this song by P!nk; personally I think it's funny… /watch?v=GCgHEQuVtmw&feature=related