I've felt these days gone slowly. We're equally busy in the office and it's still stressful to get the scripts in time. I'm supposed to have a 'special' meeting with Takano-san and meanwhile I'm just standing here thinking "What the heck does he wants?" and I'm actually kinda nervous about it, it's been a matter of months I remembered Takano-san was my high school crush "Saga-senpai" and since that day I've been dragged into a lot of awkward situations with him just because he wants me to say I'm in love with him over again. That ain't gonna happen! There's no way I'll admit something that's NOT true. Still, I really wonder what he wants to talk to me about.
After a couple of minutes I arrived to the cafeteria, where Takano-san was already waiting for me.
"What did you want to tell me?" – I asked curious.
"I'm glad you came. Please, take a seat" – He pointed at the chair in front of him. He had a serious face.
"What's the matter?"
"Onodera…" – He made a dramatic pause and avoid making eye contact with me – "I need to ask you a huge favor". I simply nodded my head in signs for him to finish the sentence explaining me what was the favor about. – "I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend"
"Please it'll take just a couple of minutes I promise I won't do anything to you"
Wait… did he just say "I won't do anything to you"? What's wrong with him? He used to bother me with all that stuff before.
"Why do I have to help you with this? That's right! Why me? You should ask Yokozawa-san" – I said avoiding eye contact and started feeling an obvious blush on my face.
"Look, there's some creepy dude that has a crush on me and I've been trying to tell him in every possible way to stay away from me, he never did because none of my reasons were good enough, so I came up with the idea of telling him I had a boyfriend already. Yes I would have asked Yokozawa but he knows him, so it wouldn't work. But he doesn't know you, that's why I need you to help me. Please."
It seemed like he was really desperate… I'm not so sure about this, but, he said that nothing's going to happen to me, and well it's just a quick favor.
"Okay fine, I'll help you."
"Great thank you, cause he's coming right now" – he said pointing at the door. I turned around and saw a tall, blue-eyed guy with a huge smile on his face coming to our table.
"Come sit next to me" – he said lowering his voice.
"NOW!" – he ordered. I moved as quick as I could and sat next to him.
"Ahh Masamune! Nice to see you once again!" – he smiled while they both shake hands. Did he just call him by his name? I don't know why but I'm not feeling a good vibe over this guy…
"Yes it's been a while. Have a seat please" – He sat in front of Takano-san. "Yuki, I'd like to introduce you my boyfriend, Onodera Ritsu."
I could feel those words crossing my heart, it basically felt like getting some little electric shocks in the inside, and I couldn't figure out if they were in a good or bad way.
"It's a pleasure to meet you" – I smiled.
"Well I can't say the same kid…" –he said and then looked to Takano-san "I'll keep tying Takano, I won't give up, and someday I'll get the luck that you'll feel the same way I feel about you"
"I'm sorry Yuki, but I'm with Ritsu right now"
"If you really are, prove it."
"What do you mean?" – I asked curious.
"You heard me, show me some proves that show you're actually dating" – He kept suspicious in my looks ex-crush.
"Fine" – Takano agreed – "I'm sorry you have to see this." – He took me by my cheeks and turned my head slowly, getting closer and closer to my lips. My eyes were wide open, Should I stop? Should I let him kiss me? There was no time to decide which option to take considering he was closer second by second and I my mind was already blocked. I started closing my eyes and let the moment happen… After a couple of seconds it all ended.
"I have strong feelings for Ritsu, he's the guy for me, he understands me and makes me feel something no one has ever done, I'm sorry Yuki" – Takano-san stated. I could felt my cheeks turning completely red. Were they lies or just the truth he never dared to tell me? Yuki had a disappointed look on his face.
"I guess I'll have to move on then…" – he said looking to the floor – "Have a nice day guys" – and he left without turning back.
"What the heck were you possibly thinking! You kissed me! You said you wouldn't do anything to me you idiot!" – I was anxious yet quite surprised about this couple of minutes that just passed.
"Give me a break Onodera, I didn't kiss you and you know it. I covered your lips with my hand but in his perspective he didn't notice. Nothing happened to you okay? Thanks for the help. I gotta go" – He pet my hair and left.
Now that he said so…. he was right, I didn't feel his lips, I just didn't realize that because I closed my eyes at the moment. In fact now that I notice it, Takano-san has been acting weird lately, he talks to me just for work and tries to stay away of me as possible. He uses to touch me whenever he has a chance to and he does what he pleases with me and he hasn't done anything of that these days… I'm starting to wonder why.
During the day, things were pretty calm in the office, there wasn't as much work as it usually does. In our way back home, Takano-san and I went together to the station; he didn't speak to me, unless it was something about work. I was afraid of staying alone with him because he would probably start touching me without my will like he always does, but when we were completely alone on our way to our department he didn't. Not even a single touch. Not even a single look. Is not that I care but, what the hell is going on? From one day to another he says he loves me and then he acts like nothing happened and just stopped harassing me? He had the chance to kiss me this morning, a chance he wouldn't even mind of leaving apart and he didn't take it… What happened? ... Did I… Did I do something wrong? Or maybe… he actually never loved me and he was just messing around with me again? ... There has to be a reason why he stopped 'bothering' me with those kind of things.
Wait a minute… why do I even care? It's better. Yeah! It's better. Now we can get along as boss and his employee, just that, and finally focus on work and just work. It's not like I still like Takano-san… It's been 10 years already and he has done nothing but making fun of me and bothering since we met again. But maybe, just maybe… I still do l-like him? How is that even possible? I don't get it… I made sure to stop feeling love for someone to avoid getting hurt again. Yes, absolutely, this is NOT love, there's no way in hell it's that. It'll never turn into love and I'll never admit it is! ...
The next day, my alarm got late 1 hour so I arrive 1 hour late to the office.
"Onodera, you're late" - Takano-san said giving me a death look
"I'm so sorry! My alarm had 1 hour forward so it didn't sound"
"There are no excuses and I'm not your mamma to wake you up every single morning. You have to be more responsible about this stuff Onodera, you're a grown up adult now"
"Jeezz now you're talking to me like my mom"
He gave me another death stare. I avoided eye-contact, apologized again and I went to sit in my chair. What's going on? I know I got late to work but a few months ago I arrived 2 hours late for one even more stupid reason and he wasn't this mad, in fact we had a meeting that day and I was late, today we didn't have anything important so why getting so angry?. Why is he so cold to me? I'm actually starting to miss the old Takano-san. What's happening? I'm seriously concerned about all this. "Hello, I'm concerned about you, you haven't touch and kiss me and you're treating me in a cold way, why?" YEAH RIGHT, it's not like I can go directly to Takano-san and ask what's wrong with him or what have I done to get him to act that way with me.
I know I shouldn't care but I fucking hate this about me, I'm always so concerned and worried about my feelings and ideas. I should listen to my brain but my heart keeps telling me my real emotions. It beats faster and faster and my cheeks start turning red every time I think of Takano-san or every time he touches me and I just HATE that! I shouldn't have loved him back then, and definitely I shouldn't love him again, it's just a BIG fatal and awful mistake, and the worst part is that… I already know that. But then… why do I care so much about this? …
Later that night someone knocked at my door, it was him.
"Yes?" – I opened the door.
"Onodera, I need you to check these scripts before I send them to the printer" – he said handing them to me and staring at them without even entering through the door as he always did.
"Sure" – I grabbed them and he went on his way back to his apartment. I left the scripts in a little table inside.
"Uhmm... Takano-san?" – I interrupted him before he could turn the doorknob to close the door. I could feel my face turning red, and I couldn't stand making eye-contact with him.
"What is it?" – He asked curious. This was too hard for me, what was I doing? I couldn't get any words out of my mouth - "Well if it's nothing I shall leave now…" – He closed the door.
Without even thinking, I opened it, took him by his right arm and forced him to enter my apartment. I slammed the door with a strength I didn't know I had.
"What the heck is your problem? ..." – I asked looking to the floor.
"Huh? I should be the one asking that right now don't you think?"
"I asked you a question…" - I stated serious.
"What do you mean?"
"What do you mean with what did I mean!" – I could clearly feel how mad and desperate I was starting to get - "What happened … between us?"
"Again… what do you mean?" – He was answering with the same question, even with the same 'I don't give a damn' look… I'm not liking this, I'm not liking this at all… But I really have to know what's going on or what did I do to make him change all of a sudden his attitude towards me.
"Is it because I did something wrong? Is it because I'm not enough for you? Maybe because you realized I was never worth it? Or… maybe because I've always been an object for you… an object with which you entertained yourself when you felt like ...?"
"STOP IT ALREADY!" – Tears started to fell down my cheeks and my voice began to tremble with the fear of listening to his answer - "I can't take it anymore damn it! No matter what I do I can't stop thinking about this… I know I shouldn't care this much, but what do I? And I just can't stop blaming myself for every single thing that happens! You've been acting weird with me, you don't harass me anymore, there's not a single touch or even a caring look…" – It was enough, my tears where just so much I couldn't say anything else, my voice was already broken. And there was I, holding myself in Takano-san's chest without detaching.
After a matter of seconds, I hugged him tight.
"You're such a stupid…" – he said.
"Just answer my question."
"You simply don't understand do you?" – I stared at him curious - You wanna know the reason why I stopped being like that with you? Because you never showed a little of concern or love towards me, I always showed you my feelings without even hesitating but you never accepted them or said anything about it, you just kept rejecting me, so I decided it was time to move on already, to give up on you because I wasn't going to force you to do things you don't want to. I was hurting myself with all that so I decided to stop and just leave you alone."
My eyes were wide open, so all of this misunderstanding was… my fault? I couldn't be more stupid!
"Now please, let me go" – He said trying to separate from my hug.
Ritsu blocked the door with his arm, which left Takano leaning on it. Without hesitating the green-eyed guy leaned over to kiss his lover's lips, he already missed them so badly so he made the moment last. Takano-san looked quite impressed – "What just happened?" he thought, but his question was obvious in his look. Ritsu's eyes started to tear all over again, those emotions were killing him on the inside.
"I'm… really sorry Takano-san, it has been all my fault… I don't know if you gave up on me already, and if you did I'm sorry but I just needed to feel those lips I thought I'll feel the day you asked me that favor…"
Takano-san smiled by noticing his lover still cared about him.
"I… I s-still love you and… I-I'm sorry if I didn't show it at the beginning, I'm just not good expressing my feelings to others and I'm still w-working on that but I, I can't y-yet." – He stuttered in his tears.
Takano was shocked with these words, he'd never believe Ritsu felt that way because he never showed or said it.
"Can I ask you something?"
"How did you feel when I asked you that favor?"
"How did I feel?... glad because you asked me to help you out, I didn't like it at once but when I saw that guy I thought to myself "I don't want to lose Takano-san, I want him just for myself" but those were feelings I didn't want to admit and kept avoiding them until I realized I was already losing you already… This whole misunderstanding is my entire fault a-and… I'm really sorry" – Ritsu hold Takano tight.
"I should also apologize… I shouldn't have give up on you so easily and let you go without even trying harder…"
"Don't be an idiot" – Ritsu leaned to kiss Takano-san all over again. He replied stroking Onodera's hair softly – "It's my turn to undo what I did; I'll make it up to you" – He blinked his right eye.
"Where did that confidence suddenly came from?" – The dark-haired guy asked curious.
They started kissing all over and surprisingly Ritsu was decided to take the lead on this one. It was already too late to back off, everything was dark and both of them were already on Ritsu's bed.
"How come I'm the one who's down?" – Takano-san asked surprised.
"I told you I'd make it up to you didn't I? Let's recover those nights we didn't have together because this time… I don't want to lose you, to anyone but me."
Obviously Takano wouldn't stop him from doing this, he was more than curious to see what his lover was going to do with him, he actually thought he might have learned something about their other nights together, considering Ritsu has always been the one down.
They started undressing each other without detaching; their kisses were strong yet soft and kind. Ritsu kept touching Takano all over, from his abs all the way to his hips and ending up to find his already straining member, and right after he got there, he started rubbing it over and over without stopping, making Masamune moan. Takano wouldn't let him do all the work by himself, yes he was going to enjoy every single moment he had with his guy but that didn't mean he couldn't do anything to turn everything up. They were now completely naked and Ritsu, still grabbing Takano's member decided it was time already to taste it by himself. He started petting Ritsu's hair while he didn't stop sucking his cock~
"N-ngh!~" - Takano couldn't help it but cry a little moan, it felt so damn good and Ritsu was preparing himself to get inside of him, ohh he sure was determined to do it.
"R-Ritsu I…" – Masamune could barely speak, the fact of the pleasure he felt to those touches and kisses were a big obstacle, he sure was enjoying the moment.
"Takano-san…" – Ritsu looked at those brown eyes that he loved, and let out a little smile, approaching to him slowly to mark a sweet kiss on his lips – "I-I'm coming in" – Ritsu adviced Takano, placing his ankles on his shoulders. Ritsu moved his hips forward until he slowly penetrated his lover. The brown-eyed guy let out a yelp, clenching the blanket and closing his eyes as pain shot up his spine.
"Damn that felt really good" – Takano admitted. Ritsu thought it might be time already to get things through another level and go a little faster. He started moving faster and faster and while doing it over and over again, everything got worse for Takano when Ritsu decided to masturbate him while doing it.
"N-nghhh! Ahhh~" – Takano rested his head on the pillow as much as he could. The pleasure he felt was turning into a lot of heat and groans even stronger.
"W-wait!~" – He cried as he felt Ritsu inside of him. He leaned over to kiss him so he could stop moaning. After a couple of minutes, Takano's dick was already wet, and they were already exhausted. Ritsu, still above Takano, rested on his chest, and now they were both covered with the blankets. Takano hold Ritsu tight, he considered him his little stubborn a treasure. A special treasure.
"I love you" – the green-eyed guy whispered before getting totally asleep. Takano could felt those words right deep into his heart, and he smiled closing his eyes slowly.
"I love you… Ritsu"