A/N: Day five of my week of one-shots, hellz-yeah! In honor of my third year on FF, I'm posting a new HG one-shot every day for the next six days. I posted Help, I'm Alive (Johanna) last night, check that out if you want.
…and that means that after this, there's only one fic left to be posted! *creys* Yep, that's right—I've saved Cato and Clove for last. But, hey, since today's my actual third anniversary, I made sure the one-shot I posted would be one of the best I've written.
I love this little one-shot hella-lot. I hope you guys do to xx
No Space Among the Clouds
"There's no salvation for me now,
No space among the clouds,
And I've seen that I'm heading down,
But that's alright…"
-Florence and the Machine, Lover to Lover
It was one in the morning on a Tuesday night, and she was wasted.
This happened more often than the both of us cared to admit. She'd show up on my doorstep, wobbling on her heels and smelling like champagne (the good kind, the one that her mom liked to import.) Some nights she'd cry, and on others she wouldn't. This wasn't a crying night, not by the time she'd reached my house at least, but I could see mascara smudged down to her cheeks.
"Go home, Glimmer," was I how I greeted her at the door.
"Please. Let me stay."
There was conviction in her voice that I never heard sober. "I said go home. Whatever it is this time, I don't want to hear it."
She sighed, twirling hair between her fingers. "You don't mean that."
"Actually, I do."
"No, you don't," she whispered. She put her head down but walked a step closer to me, and when she bit her lip I knew I was a goner. Damn her. Damn her and her vulnerability.
Have you no strength, Marvel? I told myself when she put her head against my shoulder.
It was then that I smelled the cologne on her dress.
"Who were just with?" I asked. This was a very difficult line to toe with a sober Glimmer.
"His name is Jade."
"I know who Jade is."
"Hm, that's interesting. I don't."
I didn't quite push her off me, but I definitely held her an arm's length away. Even in her drunken haze, I could see the smugness in her eyes.
"This is destructive, Glimmer. You can't keep doing this. Not every night."
It was such a disgusting thing to be smug about.
"Says the boy who's going to volunteer himself for suicide next year!" she laughed. "What d'you know about destructive, Marvel?"
It was agonizing, but I ignored that comment. "If you're not sorry about fucking around, then you should stop coming back here."
Her smile disappeared. "I'm not sorry," she repeated.
Her eyes never lingered on mine in training. She knows never to look in any boy's way for too long, because a girl like her isn't allowed a favorite. She's allowed a preference, I guess, but there can never be one.
We'd spar. We'd fight. But it was all for training. Our interactions were limited in the academy.
I know Jade, of course. I guess I could go as far to say I'm friends with him. And since guys talk and guys brag, the topic of conversation the next day wasn't a surprise to me.
"You ever gotten with Glimmer?" he asked.
The relish in his voice made me gag, but then again, so did she. "Have you?"
He snickered, picking up a spear with one hand and punching my arm with the other. "Man, you should get on that before you leave town. She's all everyone says she is."
I knew what everyone said about Glimmer. Banging, mad hot, never says no. Most of them knew that we were neighbors, and that our mothers shared gossip over wine every Sunday. But they never knew or suspected how I was the one she would run to after.
Imagine helping someone that would welcome it one minute and reject it the next. It drove me crazy.
"I'll keep that in mind," I responded coolly. I took that as a cue to walk over to swords. My sword fighting didn't need any work, but my mind needed a distraction.
I heard it from my left. It was a loaded greeting.
I turned, knowing I would see her, with her blonde hair in two braids. I hated those braids.
"Hi," I replied.
I hate those braids, I reminded myself. I hate those braids and I hate that hair and that girl is nothing but trouble.
I couldn't bring myself to say "I hate her", even though it was true in its own way.
"You're not mad at me, are you?" she asked.
I fumed where I stood. Mad? No, I'm just a little peeved that I have to hear about your questionable mating habits on a regular basis.
But I responded with a "No," because that was the more honest of the two answers.
I'm a goner.
"Volunteering myself for a suicide mission, huh? It's such a grand waste of my time. It's what you would call destructive!"
I was screaming and throwing furniture around our train car. Cashmere and Gloss were in the next car over, but for whatever reason, they never intervened. My tantrum probably sounded comical in their ears, not that I blamed them.
She got out of her seat, grabbing my arm. "Marvel, please, not now."
"Not now? We'll talk about this later, that's what you want? Oh, that's fucking perfect, I'll just wait for you to get hammered so I can actually get a straightforward conversation out of you!"
It was a hurtful comment, and it should've brought tears to her eyes. But it didn't. Maybe I'd underestimated Glimmer.
"Be quiet," she snapped.
"Why'd you do it?" It didn't take long for my tone to go from angry to exasperated. "You would've been the best teacher at our Academy in decades, you would've helped someone win their own Hunger Games. Getting killed in one isn't doing you any favors."
She pursed her lips. "There's more to my life than District One. There's a whole world out there for me."
"Who told you that?"
She was right. I remembered, but I didn't think she did. That conversation happened a long time ago.
"You don't think I can win," she said quietly.
I was holding on to her, and she was doing the same. It was only in moments like these that I realized how close we really were.
"No," I answered, "Because I'm going to win."
She didn't do much more than nod. And even though the words had already come out of my mouth, that was when I really knew I couldn't save her—in any way.
She was already beyond salvation, but she was taking me down with her.
The boys who have gotten with Glimmer don't know a lot about her. They don't know that I was her first. We were sixteen. It only happened once, and that was enough. But that wasn't what made her go from the mousy-haired wallflower to Glimmer, the gem of District One.
I didn't know much about anything, but I taught her what I could.
I told her stories about my parents. I told her about how they fell in love. I told her about the Hunger Games, and how when I won, I would take her around the nation with me. That was what my world was limited to—sappy love stories and the Hunger Games. At the end of the day, those two things didn't coexist well in my life.
I don't know where things went wrong. Was it my fault? It very well could be. But it doesn't matter, because it's too late now.
All that matters are her hands against mine, her lips pressing up against mine for the first time in two years, and it's right here and right now as we're on a train with a one way ticket to the Capitol that I can't distinguish the mousy-haired girl from this glamazon, because they're as much the same as they are different.
Her hands are in mine. We fall to the floor.
I can't save her.
I'm seeing a blonde beauty, when the brown haired wallflower meant more.
She's not sorry.
No matter how angry I get, I've never been able to shake her. Whatever it is about her, I'm trapped.
We're both going to die soon. God help me if I shake her now.
A/N: Ahhh, this was fun to write. I haven't stretched my writing muscles like this in a long time, mostly because I like my long-winded, character driven multi-chaps. It was fun to challenge myself with these two, I think Glimmer and Marvel are great together even though I portrayed them as, well, a leeeeeeeettle destructive xD
Thank you so much for reading, please leave a review even if you hated it xx
Check back tomorrow for a new one-shot! Here are the titles and pairings of the six I've written—
No Space Among the Clouds (Marvel/Glimmer) *POSTED*
When the Skies get Rough (Peeta/Katniss) *POSTED*
The Merchant Girl (Haymitch/Maysilee) *POSTED*
Help, I'm Alive (Johanna) *POSTED*
A Kiss with a Fist is Better than None (Cato/Clove)
Lights Will Guide you Home (Mr. and Mrs. Undersee) *POSTED*
Today's my account's third birthday~ *nudge nudge* Review s'il vous plait? :D heheh.