This is an alternate ending to '9 Reasons Why' it was hard to write and even harder to post. Do NOT read this if you have trouble with death or suicide. Thank you so much for your support through this story.

A/N: I do not own Teen Wolf or any of it's characters.

9 Reasons Why Alternate Video 9- Papa Stilinski

"Dad, I know that the first time it happened it was an accident. I know that you had drank too much, I know that you were tired of my lies. I know that you miss mom and when you look at me you see her, and I understand why that would upset you. I understand a lot of things, but I will never understand why you did it a second time, or a third or a fourth time. I will never understand what I could have done to ever cause you to hit me." Isaac's howls once again echoed through the forest and they could hear it echo back at them from Isaac's phone, could hear Stiles sob from the sound of it.

"Isaac please, you'll make me so sad. Dad, I love you, and I will always love you but when you hit me it made me feel so...useless. I had always believed that you loved me, I still do. I know that you love me but you just can't handle the pressure of it all anymore. You can't look at me without seeing her anymore, you can't pretend that everything is alright because it isn't, nothing ever is. I want you to know that I love you, nothing you did to me will ever change that. I will always love you, just as I know you will always love me." Stiles sobbed slightly and the pack heard it echo through the trees, their sensitive ears picking up Stiles' voice.

"Dad, I would love to say more but my pack is close, too close. I can't...I have to do this now, before they get here, I don't want them to see what I'm going to do, not while it's happening anyways. I don't want the last thing I see to be their horrified faces." Isaac looked at the screen and noticed a hand gun in Stiles hand, pointed right at his head. Isaac panicked, he shoved the phone in Derek's face and when Derek saw the image his eyes went red and he passed Isaac to Scott who hefted him easily.

Derek ran faster than the others picking up speed as he got closer to the abandoned barn that Stiles sat against, he could hear the boy's heart beat pick up and he knew that he only had seconds before Stiles pulled the trigger, ruining any chance at saving the boy. Derek did the first things that came to his mind and called out the boy's name in desperation.

Stiles turned to him quickly and gave him a sad smile. "Knew you were too close, much too close. My timing was a little off, you ran here faster than was expected." Stiles sad smile stayed in place and his hand didn't even shake on the gun, nor did it lower.

Derek crept slowly towards Stiles and looked him in the eyes, he didn't see any fear and he wondered if there was even anything he could do to stop the boy. They heard a howl in the woods close to their left and they both knew it was Isaac, Derek watched as Stile's eyes teared up and fear for Isaac crept into his eyes. He grasped that weakness and ran with it desperately.

"He's going to see Stiles, he's going to have to watch while you do this. He's going to watch while you die, see the life slip from your eyes, is that what you want?" Just then the pack is breaking into the clearing and they all stop and stare at Stiles in horror before Isaac falls from Scott's arms and he runs straight for Stiles. Stiles just stares at the boy in panic before looking at Derek in desperation. Derek's eyes hardened and he raised his hand slowly, towards the gun that Stiles was holding only to be stopped abruptly by a barrier.

Derek growled in anger and looked at the ground, a line of mountain ash surrounded Stiles, none of them would be able to get to Stiles except maybe Danny, Derek looked to the boy and Danny nodded understanding, he moved towards the circle but was stopped just like Derek.

"Sorry, I figured out how to ward against everyone but myself." Stiles voice was weak and he dropped the gun to the ground. "I'm so sorry Isaac, I know this isn't what you wanted, I know you wanted more time." Stiles coughed harshly and came away with blood on his fingers. "Derek, you need to make them leave, you all need to leave. There's nothing for you to do, I've decided and nothing you say or do will change my mind." Stiles eyes became blurry but the boy found some inner strength and straightened up into a proper sitting position.

"Isaac, leave, NOW!" Stiles raised his voice into a command and the whole pack flinched at his tone. Isaac whined but obeyed, backing into the trees surrounding the clearing. The rest of the pack looked between Stiles and Isaac before they too retreated, they were all hoping maybe Derek could get through to Stiles.

Derek sat just outside the circle, his teeth grinding in anger.

"Stiles, you have to break the circle so I can bite you. The poison wont work if I give you The Bite." Derek's eyes became pleading and he watched Stiles brown eyes focus on him in determination before the boy smiled sadly at him.

"No Derek, I'm sorry, but it's too late. This is what I want, this is my decision and you can't take it away from me. I-I don't want you to blame yourself okay? This...this is my decision, I take all of the blame. I know it's a lot to ask but...can you take care of my dad? If no one is there he'll...well it wont be good."

Derek felt the tears before he realized he was crying. He could smell the poison taking root, taking the boy closer and closer to death. Derek nodded his acquiesce and Stiles nodded back in happiness.

Stiles smiled beatifically at him and then turned towards the sky, his smile now shaky as his own tears fell down his cheeks. Stiles took a deep breath and then let it out, his eyelids fluttered and Derek howled as his last heartbeat rang loudly in his ears. He heard the pack howl in agony with him but didn't acknowledge it, all he could see was the boy before him, pale skin gleaming in the light of the moon above. Derek reached for him and slipped past the ward easily, the magic broken now that Stiles was gone. Derek wrapped himself around Stiles body and howled. The pack joined in around him and they all crowded around, their hands reaching to touch Stiles, to smell him one last time before his scent disappeared forever.

The funeral was held three days after, the entire pack attended as well as most of the lacrosse team. The entire Beacon Hills police department were there, which of course included Sheriff Stilinski.

The man was distraught, his eyes red with crying and three day old stubble covering his face. Derek had been there when the man had watched his son's last words, had seen the man break from his guilt, had seen it change something inside of him.

The pack and Stiles' father stayed at the grave long after the ceremony, trying to hold onto Stiles for as long as possible, some still hoping it was all a bad dream of some kind. They could all hear the sobs that John Stilinski was letting out, they all stayed as the man knelt on his son's grave and cried. "You can't be gone Stiles, I can't, I can't lose you too." John covered his face with his hands but the pack could still hear him. "I didn't get to say I was sorry, didn't get to tell you how much I loved you. Stiles...please." No one answered him and the sheriff eventually got up and went home to his empty house, filled with memories and bitter regret.

The Pack stayed longer, each lingering on their memories of Stiles and trying to find the strength to go on, to live their lives for Stiles. Derek was the last to leave, he stood staring at Stiles headstone and felt the guilt eating him alive. If he hadn't told the pack to leave Stiles alone, if he hadn't pushed him away then this would have never happened. Stiles would be here, with him, would be his Mate, his everything.

"I-I don't want you to blame yourself okay? This...this is my decision, I take all of the blame."

The words rang in his head and he choked back a sob and then let out a torn chuckle. Of course he would hear Stiles voice in his mind, would hear the boy, even in death trying to take care of Derek, to make sure he didn't feel any guilt over his death. Derek took one more look at the grave and then went to follow his pack home.

Every year after the pack would gather at Stiles' grave and tell him about their lives, the good and the bad and they hoped he was proud of them, proud of what they had accomplished in their lives, they had lived with his memory in their hearts and tried their hardest to make him proud. Derek knew he would be proud of the pack, of how they had grown, how they had made wonderful lives for themselves.

Derek hoped Stiles would be proud of him, of how he had improved as an Alpha and made sure his pack never wanted for anything, of how he visited the Stilinski house at least once a week to make sure John was doing okay and eating healthy, just like Stiles would have wanted. They came every year, and every year they could feel him around them, guiding them. Derek felt like sometimes he could feel the boy's brown eyes watching him, warming with a wide grin.

Derek knew he would never see the smile again but even the memory of it warmed something inside of him. Derek trailed his fingers over the headstone slowly, his fingers lingering over Stiles first name before smiling sadly at the ground. Wherever Stiles was he knew that he would see him again, one way or another.