Author's Note: I'm just so ready to be done with this story, for more reasons than one.
First reason: I've lost my motivation for it. I honestly (and I hate to admit this) don't even know where I'm going with it. You know how you have a plan for a story, then it takes a different turn? That's what happened with this one. I guess I got sidetracked, but I'm ready to be done with it.
Second reason: Lately, this story has gotten more hate than love. First, people complain that its not enough of a Jacob/Bella romance for them, which kind of confuses me. This story was intended to be moreso of a drama, not a romance. So, in hopes of pleasing my reviewers, I changed the two main characters to Edward and Bella. But then, people started complaining that it wasn't a Bella and Edward romance. I mean, really? Instead of caring about the actual story and its plot, everyone seems to be so worried about the romance. So, the only character I have listed is Bella now. Which is kind of ridiculous.
So, yeah. I'm kinda upset, but it is what it is. I won't say I'm surprised if I get more hate after this. I'm gonna try to give this story a substantial ending, but as of now, I'm just ready to do away with it. I thought of deleting it, but, I actually enjoyed writing this for the most part, so I won't do that.
Anyway, thanks to everyone for reading this and I hope you continue to read more of my stories. I promise, I won't get sidetracked again.
Bella stared at the bottle of pills on the coffee table and took another deep breath. Her meeting with Dr. Carlisle really scared her, but not more than the condition that he diagnosed her with. Paranoid Schizophrenia. That would explain the disturbing hallucinations, her mood swings, her drowsiness, and her uncontrollable thoughts. She sniffed and took hold of the bottle, dumping two capsules into her hand. The doctor told her to take four of those per day, two in the morning and two at night. It was three o'clock in the morning, and Bella sat in the darkness of her living room.
Alice wasn't there; she was at home with Jasper, spending some well needed time with him. It was just Bella, and the sound of the wall clock. She grabbed the glass of water that sat next to her and inched the pills to her mouth.
"Bella," a voice breathed. Bella stiffened, matching the voice to Edward's. Edward isn't there, she told herself. She quickly downed the pills and relaxed her head against the couch. That's when she felt icy fingers graze her thigh. She flinched and reached over, snapping on the lamp. No one was in sight. She teared up, swallowing the thick lump in her throat.
"God," she said, standing to her feet. She looked around her empty apartment and couldn't help but to flinch at the space that surrounded her. Her eyes drooped down at the ground as she slumped back into the couch. She couldn't deny how scared she was, but there was nothing that she could really do about her mental illness.
The phone's blaring ring startled her. She looked over at the white, cordless phone and snatched it off of the receiver. She pressed answer without checking the caller ID.
"Hello?" she asked tiredly.
"Hey, Bella," Jacob said on the other line. Bella softened up at the sound of his voice.
"Jake," she said in acknowledgment. "Why are you calling so late? Or, so early?" she asked confusedly. He sighed and she could hear him shuffling around.
"Couldn't sleep," he answered honestly.
"What if I were fast asleep, and you just interrupted a really good dream?" she asked, a light smile on her face.
"Did I?" he asked, already knowing the answer.
"No, but..." she said, trailing off. He chuckled.
"Thought so," he responded. She smiled involuntarily. "Anyway, I just wanted to know how it went with the therapist."
Bella gulped, her eyes falling on the pills once again. "He uh... he told me that I had Paranoid Schizophrenia," she answered quietly. It took a minute for Jacob to respond.
"Is he sure?" Jacob asked.
"I don't doubt him," Bella said painfully. She reached over to grab the pills, squeezing the bottle. She almost felt tempted to take more.
"How are you feeling?" he asked a minute later.
"Like... I'm scared. I feel like I'm being watched," Bella admitted, a shiver going down her spine. "I guess that's the paranoia kicking in."
"That's nothing to joke about," he told her.
"I wasn't joking," she responded dumbly.
"Why are you alone?" he asked.
"Couldn't find a babysitter," she stated.
"Bella," he said, a hint of annoyance to his tone. "I'm serious. You shouldn't be alone right now."
"Alice is with her boyfriend. My father is working late shifts left and right, and I'm on a leave of absence from work. I don't exactly have anyone that I can be with right now," she told him, complete seriousness to her tone.
"Where do you live?" he asked suddenly. She narrowed her eyes.
"Why?" she wondered. She heard him shuffling around again, and it sounded like he was tying his shoes.
"I'm coming over. What's your address?" he repeated. She rolled her eyes and gave him the address to her apartment.
"This is unnecessary," she argued, but it was too late. He had already hung up. She huffed and sat the phone back on the receiver, relaxing in her seat. She couldn't be mad at the fact that Jacob wanted to come over to be of some company. Quite frankly, she didn't enjoy being alone to get spooked by her vivid hallucinations. She was silently thankful that Jacob was coming over.
About twenty minutes later, she heard a knock at the door. She hesitantly stood up, walking toward it. The doctor warned her that she might not be able to tell what was really happening, with her hallucinations being so frequent, but she had been expecting Jacob. She opened the door, and sighed of relief when a tall, tan figure greeted her.
"Hey Jacob," she said, stepping aside so that he could come in. He looked around and nodded slowly.
"So this is casa de la Bella?" he asked, giving her a shy grin.
"Not for long," she said, walking over to reclaim her position on the couch. He scrunched his eyebrows and sat down beside her.
"What do you mean?" he asked. Bella toyed with her fingers, contemplating on whether she wanted to tell him or not. She hadn't told anyone, not even Alice, and she was afraid that saying it out loud would make it final.
"I'm leaving," she said, allowing her words to sink in. "I'm leaving to live with my mother in Florida," she finished, avoiding his eyes. There was a thick silence, and she finally met his intense stare. He looked sad.
"You're leaving?" he asked regretfully. Bella nodded and pulled her hair into a sloppy bun.
"I need a fresh start," she said, her voice slowly becoming hoarse. "I talked to my mom about it a few days ago. She thinks it would be a good idea. I could spend all of my time with my her, and I can get away from..." Bella said, trailing off.
"Edward's memory," he finished for her. She shrugged sadly.
"I guess that's what I'm trying to say, isn't it?" she whispered to herself. She couldn't help but to feel bad for Jacob, though. He lost everything, and he'd soon be losing Bella as well.
"Have you talked to Rosalie lately?" Bella asked after realizing that he wasn't going to respond.
"Yeah," he said, but he didn't sound too happy about it.
"And?" she urged.
"She isn't ready to come home," he said, a frown on his face. Bella rubbed his shoulder comfortingly. He smiled sadly at the gesture, even though it didn't mean much. They sat in silence as light began to pour through the curtains. Stomachs rumbling, they made a stop at McDonald's, and then reclaimed their spots on the couch. Soon, the light began to leave the atmosphere, and it was them and the darkness that Bella called a living room. She could hear Jacob snoring as she downed two of the pills. Soon, she was snoozing just as loudly as he was.
two weeks later
Alice and Jacob helped drag the last of Bella's bags to her fathers truck. Charlie sat in the drivers seat, his head down. He wasn't the only one upset about Bella's decision to move, though. Alice was in tears for the whole day, and Jacob wore a deep frown the whole time. Bella sighed sadly at the sight of her friends, but stood by her decision. She needed this move. She needed the time with her mother. She couldn't help feeling excited about it, either.
Jasper tossed some of Bella's spare things into the truck and stood beside Alice's crying figure. Bella grabbed the apartment key out of her pocket and pressed it to her lips. She had many memories in that apartment, and she was honestly sad to leave it. She sighed and handed the key to the landlord, who then gave Bella a pen and a piece of paper. She signed away her rights to the apartment and gave the man the piece of paper. The deed was done.
She walked over to join Jacob, Jasper and Alice as they waited by the car. Alice was the first to run up to pull Bella into an oxygen-free hug. Bella hugged her back tightly, resenting the moment that she'd leave Alice's sight. Alice had been her best friend for as long as she could remember, and it hurt to know that after Bella moved, they wouldn't be as close. She pulled away, fresh tears falling down Alice's pale cheeks. Bella kissed them away out of comfort, pulling Alice into another sincere hug. Jacob walked over, a box in his hands. Bella stared down at it before slowly pulling away from Alice.
"What is that?" Bella asked. He smiled for the first time that day and nudged it toward her.
"Just open it," he urged. She contemplated it before taking the box from him. She lifted the top and gasped quietly. It was a cellphone. She looked up at Jacob and smiled sadly.
"Is this your way of telling me to stay in touch?" she asked. He pulled her into a warm hug as she responded to it with just as much love. Jacob had become a good friend of hers, despite the treacherous encounters that the two had come across. She was going to miss him dearly. After what felt like forever, they pulled away from each other.
"I noticed that you still hadn't gotten yourself a new cellphone, and I assumed that you'd be needing one. It's a track phone, sorry to say. But, I put 100 minutes on there, so that should get you started. My number's already saved in there, along with Alice and Jasper's. Don't be afraid to call and text," he said with a wink. She pulled him into another hug, pecking his cheek.
"Thank you," she whispered, sniffing. She knew she was on the verge of tears. "Thank you so much."
It was Jasper's turn to say goodbye. He walked up to Bella, giving her a short but meaningful hug. For as long as they've known each other, they never crossed paths as much as they would have liked to. Yeah, he was Alice's boyfriend, but he didn't socialize much. Regardless, Bella was going to miss him.
"Take care," he told her, giving her a smile. Alice burst with more tears.
"Come on, Alice," Bella said, tearing up herself. "It's not like I'm never going to see you again. You can come visit me anytime, and I'll definitely be back to visit," Bella promised, glancing over at Jacob. She was happy when she was rewarded with a grin.
"I know, I'm just going to miss seeing you every day," Alice said between sniffles. Bella wiped tears from her own cheeks and gave Alice one last hug.
"I love you girl," she said, pulling away.
"I love you too," Alice responded. She turned to the boys as they gave her their last hugs. She opened the door to the passenger seat and flung her bag inside. She waved to them as they stood together, solemn looks on all of their faces. They lifted their hands in response, which Bella assumed were to be waves. She got in the car and closed the door as Charlie started the ignition. He pulled out of the parking space and began driving slowly toward the exit of the parking garage. Alice, Jacob, and Jasper's figures were getting smaller and smaller until she couldn't see them anymore. It saddened her deeply.
Her and Charlie talked for a while as he drove her to the airport. He expressed his apologies for not being around enough, but Bella assured him that he had nothing to be sorry for. After a long while of hugs and kisses, Bella was ready to board her flight to Florida.
Once she was in her seat, she took out her headphones and closed her eyes, awaiting the long ride. She smiled to herself, thinking of her new beginning. If there was anything she deserved, it was a shot at a new life.
. . .
5 years later
Bella walked into her tiny house, mail in hand. She flipped through it, cringing at the bills. Her face lit up at the package that she received from Alice and Jasper. She hopped on the stool and ripped it open. It was a letter, and a few pictures.
I know I saw you a few months ago, but I still miss you so much. Me and Jas are doing good, but we're still getting used to being parents. :) Bre is getting so big! I put some pictures in the package, so don't forget to hang them on your fridge. ;) your God child misses you! Well, call me as soon as you read this, okay? Just to make sure you got it! Love you, Bella! Bye.
Bella smiled as she shuffled through the pictures. Jasper and Alice had a daughter shortly after they got married. She was two years old now, and more adorable than ever. She had dark brown hair, and eyes like her mothers, but everything else took after her father. Bella walked over and stuck her favorite pictures on the fridge, along with the other ones of Bre that were already up there.
She reached for her phone and smiled at the text from Jacob. She kept good communication with him, and they were still as close as ever.
Jacob and Rosalie never ended up getting back together. She divorced him a year after her miscarriage, leaving him an emotional wreck. She met a guy named Emmett shortly after, and ran off to marry him. Jacob ended up adopting Seth like he wanted to for the longest, and he slowly began to fill the void in Jacob's life. Jacob continued to go on dates, but vowed that he'd never remarry.
Hey stranger. :) How are my girls? He asked. She smiled as she tapped anxiously on the phone.
We're good. Expecting a visit from you and Seth soon! She replied, sending the text. Bella sat the rest of the mail on the counter as she headed into the back of the small house. She came face to face with the brown wooden door with pictures of unicorns and roses taped all over it.
"Nessie, come eat!" she called. Seconds later, the door swung open. Bella's five year old daughter, Renesmee, shot her a toothy grin as she jumped in her mothers arms. Bella struggled to keep her balance as she hoisted Nessie on her waist.
"You're getting a little too big for this," Bella laughed, walking her daughter into the kitchen. "There's some pictures of little Bre on the fridge, go look," Bella said, setting Nessie on her feet. Nessie ran to the refrigerator to go look at the brand new pictures of her baby God sister.
Nessie was an unexpected gift. Bella hadn't even known that she was pregnant with her until a little after she moved to Florida and she began to show. Due to all of the stress in her life, she didn't realize that she had missed many of her periods. Nessie looked every ounce of her father, but much like Bre, had hair like her mothers. The way Nessie smiled reminded Bella an awful lot of Edward, which gave her a bittersweet feeling.
Explaining to Nessie that she didn't have a dad was one of the hardest things that Bella ever had to do. Nessie was too young to know exactly what happened to him, but Bella would tell her when she was ready. Jacob was her God father, and Alice was her God mother. She saw them every few months, and spoke to them frequently on the phone. Their life was good. It wasn't perfect, but it was good.
Despite the dark roads that Bella had come across in the past five years, she was awarded with a little bit of happiness. Nessie was her world, and she was blessed that God put her in her life. It was nice to have something good to remember her husband by.
Bella bent down to Nessie's level and kissed her cheek. "How do you feel about taking a little trip down to grandma's house?"
"Yay! After ravioli?" Nessie asked, giggling.
"Yes, baby. After ravioli," Bella agreed. She was delighted when Nessie wrapped her short arms around her mothers neck, tangling her in one of Nessie's special hugs. Bella absolutely adored being a mother.
As they continued to hug, Bella's mind drifted to her life in Forks. Through the good and the bad memories, she was still there. Her hallucinations never failed to pop up randomly, but she learned how to control them better over the years. She was thankful for the pills that Dr. Carlisle still continued to send her, even though she was states away. She was thankful for a lot of things, Nessie being the biggest of all.
The feeling of her daughters arms around her told her that everything would be alright.
Author's Note: Well, there's the ending. I tried to add a bit of happiness to it, but it still made me sad. /: But I hope it didn't completely suck. And I hope you guys didn't completely hate this story. Well, thanks again, and see you soon!