A/N - so, this is my first PeterGwen, as I absolutely love 'em! The lyrics in this song are from The Story Of Us by Taylor Swift
It takes time for such deep wounds to heal, and Gwendolyn Stacy knows that far too well. She's being impatient; the only thing that can really heal her is Peter Parker, but they're not speaking.
He made a promise, her father was on his deathbed, for gods sake, he really had no choice.
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking;
Gwen was so lucky that the school desks in high school were not in rows or anything like in middle school. She couldn't sit next to anyone, which was a good thing. She was still mourning and couldn't stop that. Her father died, and the love of her life refused to speak to her. She struggled on though; she was out of a job, so school was the only thing that distracted her from the real world and what she was feeling.
Scribbling on the paper, she sighs as she spells wrong. Again. It seems her grammar and punctuation has been affected by this pain she feels inside, and so it should be. It seems that maybe school isn't a distraction. She struggles on though, just like
she's struggling with everything that used to flow so easily for her just weeks ago. Getting a new pen from her pencil-case and removing mistakes with whiteout, she gets through the lesson (barely) and makes it out of school without tripping over something as she's always in her thoughts these days, shielding herself from this cruel world.
And I'm dying to know if it's killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
He had to feel the same, right? They were in love. It's not just something that you forget about. You can't just drop it one day and walk away the next. It's unheard of, unless the guy's an asshole, which Peter Parker definitely wasn't. She knows he left her for reasons and promises and she knows that he wants her back.
Why can't they forget these promises that apparently have to be kept? Why can't they move from the endless bitter war with casualties and forget about that? Why can't they be the people they're meant to be?
Because I'm supposed to stay safe, the thought flutters into Gwen's mind and she falls to her bed frustrated. What's the point of staying safe when your life is a boring, miserable mess?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down;
Things haven't been good since that awful day.
One, her own family can't even talk to each other without bursting into tears. The feelings of family breaks them down and makes them remember him. It's bad enough having the pictures of him on the wall and having to stare into his eyes, while the real ones are now lifeless and buried in the ground. It's not fun.
Two, she can't even speak to him! He deliberately avoids her, and it's all because he's afraid to break a promise. He's afraid to put her in the line of danger.
I can handle myself! she thinks all the time when she's locked in her room, just staring at the wall. I'm not some little kid!
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now;
She realises that this really isn't going to end, and she's going to be mourning like this forever. Wake up, go to school, come home, go to bed, everyday, it's an endless cycle. And she wants to stop it - only Peter can. Millions of the decisions lie on her shoulders, and she honestly can't stop thinking about him; she gets every decision wrong.
They're never going to get together. She sees that now. Maybe, just maybe, life will be a little fair on her. Maybe she'll get through this. Maybe she'll move on. Life is surprising, and sometimes, but very rarely, miracles happen. She hasn't seen one yet, but if she sees one, it'll be a first for her.
When Peter leans forward and whispers into her ear that time in English, she smiles and feels hope once more. It was intimate, it was cute, it was simply amazing, and it relit a spark inside Gwen.
Alas, for that was her miracle.
A/N - don't favourite/alert this without reviewing