Disclaimer: Not mine and this is the only time I'll type this.
A/N: Here's the sequel. Long, bumpy road ahead, folks. It's not going to be all fluff and rainbows (this chapter mostly is, though), so here's the warning!
Tell me what ya think and what you would like to see!
I—well, we proposed to each other on December 25th. We got married the very next day. For someone as rich and well-to-do as Maura, she was pretty adamant on not spending money on a wedding to show everyone how much we already know we love each other. And maybe because her parents still hated us. Hell, they still do. But I don't regret a thing about the way we did things; I hate dresses anyway.
It's been exactly a year since we walked into the courthouse and Ma cried over not having a huge ceremony—she's still secretly holding out for one—and we decided to celebrate our anniversary in a not-so-sappy way.
We came home after work, ate dinner, drank wine that I still don't really care for, and I gave her a necklace I made out of paperclips at work because I was bored. She just laughed and hung it on a hook on the refrigerator door. And then she promptly got naked before I even had time to blink.
That was almost an hour ago. I've came at least three times and she hasn't at all. This has never happened before. I'm panicking. What if she's bored with me? What if I'm not good enough? What if she's finally been with me long enough to realize she really wants to go back to a fucking man? I hope that's not what it fucking is.
So I thrust the strap on harder, faster into her. She's moaning—and they're real—but it's still just not enough for her. I lean down and take her nipple in my mouth as I reach a hand down between us and start rubbing her clit.
My muscles are burning from how long, how many positions we've tried. But I'm not going to stop till she gets there or finally tells me to quit.
Her back arches and her head falls back against the pillow, her eyes close and I think she's finally there.
She falls back down against the bed and opens her eyes as she lets out a frustrated groan. "I can't, Jane. I just…it's not working."
I slow my thrusts, but don't stop. I lace our hands together and press a kiss to her lips. "That's okay. I'm enjoying this—getting to feel you, hear you, touch you. It's okay," I say in hopes that she'll relax just a little bit and come.
Five minutes later, and no such luck. Goddamnit.
I pull out of her and drop the harness to the floor before crawling between her legs. Her legs instantly go on my shoulders—a routine that we've perfected with ease. We tried this earlier, but hopefully now it'll actually work since she isn't trying so fucking hard.
I lick one slow, long swipe up her slit and her hips instantly jerk. I grin to myself. This may actually do it this time. One lick, another and another and her thighs are clamping down against my ears. I pull her clit into my mouth and do that thing that normally gets her off in two seconds flat and her hips jerk back once again.
"Jane," she whispers.
I take it as encouragement and wrap my hands around her legs, pulling them open wider again. I flick at it with my tongue as I suck against it and her heels start to dig into my back.
"Jane," she says in a louder voice.
She has got to be getting close by now. Without stopping my tongue, I reach up to push a couple of fingers into her and her hands tangle in my hair.
"Jane, please stop!"
I instantly jerk back and scan over her entire body as I climb over to lay beside her. She's never used the word before. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you? What's wro—"
"—I'm fine. I'm just…distracted," she says as she rolls on her side to face me.
"Oh. Okay." Thank God. I was so fucking scared I hurt her.
She goes to tangle our legs together and she gasps. "It wouldn't kill you to shave your legs every once in a while, Jane."
I can't even help but laugh at the look on her face. It's been a year and I'm still not tired of seeing that grin. "It wouldn't kill you to not point it out either, would it?"
She puts on her best thinking face before starting to laugh with me. It's still the best sound in the entire world. It dies down too quickly though, and there's a heavy silence that wasn't here before. She moves to where everything below our chests are touching and I run a finger down the slope of her nose.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
She nods her head and captures my hand in hers. She brings them down to rest in the small place between us. Her face is so serious that I'm honestly worried. Work hasn't been too hard lately, I haven't ruined any of her clothes in the laundry in at least a week, and we haven't fought over something more than doing the dishes in a really long time. This has to be something else and I'm scared of what it might be.
"Okay, what's got you so distracted?"
She twists so that she's looking up at the ceiling, but our legs are still intertwined. "What do you think about children?"
Dear. Shit. My heart immediately starts pounding against my chest. What do I think about children? Loud. Obnoxious. Fragile. Uncontrollable. And now my control issues have come back into play. Fucking great.
I prop myself up on one elbow to look down at her and shrug. "Depends on whose children we're talking about."
She rolls her eyes—a habit I really wish she hadn't picked up from me even though it is cute when she does it—and flips to where she's propped up on her elbow beside me. "Who's children would I be so focused on that I couldn't even climax tonight?"
Her frustration always makes me want to test her. I'm so immature. Another reason for me to not have kids. "Well, Doctor Isles, I thought it was imperative to never guess?"
She narrows her eyes and gives me a playful shove on my shoulder. "Be serious, Jane. Unless you want what happened tonight to happen every night, we really should talk about this."
Well, shit. She has me there. I don't ever want to go through this again. "Right. Children…" I trail off. How the fuck am I supposed to tell her I'm scared to have them without crushing her heart? Ugh. "Children are…fun. Happy. Um, playful…" Shit. I'm running out of synonyms. Must get out of this fast. "What do you think about kids?"
She flops back down to where she's staring straight up. "I think I'd like to have some."
Some? Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm not even sure about one. "Uhm," I have to clear my throat, "When? When would you like to have…some?"
Smooth, Rizzoli. Smooth.
Her shoulders shrug against the sheets. "Soon."
I feel so fucking ambushed. She's going to get her way with this. She always fucking does. Damnit. "Well, a slimy, goo-covered baby is not coming out of my body in any way, shape, or form. Hate to break it to you," I deadpan. No fucking way is that happening.
"I didn't expect it to, Jane," she says in a steely voice. Then promptly rolls over and faces the opposite direction to where no part of her is still touching me. Foot, meet mouth. Great. This is definitely not how we are going to go to sleep.
I scoot to where her back is pulled flush against my stomach and wrap my arm around her waist. "Maura, you know I didn't mean it like that." She says nothing. "I just…I deflect when I get scared. And kids….well, kids are pretty fucking scary."
"How are children scary," she finally asks. Her voice is deep and throaty so I can tell she's trying not to cry. I slowly rub my hand up and down her stomach. It's normally helps her fall asleep every night. Something about routines and comfort and some other shit, but she likes it and I like doing it.
"I don't know, they just are. Like…something could happen to them. They could get hurt. You see the same things I do every day, Maura. You know what it's like out there. Are you comfortable knowing that's what you'll be raising our child in?"
She pushes back, trying to get closer to me. "We could always move to a secluded location…"
"Real funny, Maur." When did she get so fucking cheeky? I'm supposed to be the smartass here. She laughs and rests her hand on top of mine on her stomach. "For once, I'm trying to be serious. I'm scared that they might run into something like what happened to me…Ya know?"
She takes a deep breath and rolls over in my hold to face me. She's definitely not laughing anymore. "I honestly didn't consider that, Jane. I'm sorry," she whispers.
Even when she's trying to comfort me, I feel guilty about things like that. I can't keep her from something that'll make her happy…but I'm not so sure agreeing with her about this will let me be happy. I'll probably just be worried all the time instead. I reach up and rub away the worry lines on her forehead with my thumb. "Don't be sorry. Only a fucked up person would think about something like that, anyway."
"Do not say something like that about yourself, Jane." She leans over and kisses me. "Never say that. It doesn't mean you're broken to think that way. It means you'd be a very good parent." I can't help but scoff. "I'm serious, Jane. Thinking about all the things that could go wrong…thinking about all the things that could hurt them…it means you'll always be two steps ahead. You'll always make sure they're safe."
I want to believe her, I really do. But I'm still so damn scared for our kids. Well, soon to be our kids. Shit, she already has me roped into this. "You really think that?"
She smiles and nods her head. "I can't lie, remember?"
"Yeah, yeah. I know." I really hope she's fucking right about that. Other people raise their kids just fine every day, how bad could it really be?
I lean over to kiss her, fully intending to end this conversation and go to sleep, but she rolls to where she's straddling me and kissing and licking at my neck only pausing every so often to speak. "I..can't wait…to have…your…children."
But the way she says 'your' is not innocent at all. I know her too well. That was her scheming voice. She's already got a plan involving both of us, but purposely leaving me out of it. Sneaky. I push her back away from me until I can look in her eyes. "My children?"
Her eyes are dancing and she tries to give me the best innocent smile she can muster. "You've heard of In-Vitro Fertilization, haven't you?"
I've got a mischievous/awful plan coming up in the next few chapters, you guys. Oh lordy. Brace yourselves.