Dear John – Worlds Apart Revised
AN: Ok so here it is, the first chapter of Worlds Apart Revised. There are some changes and bits added on but if I remember correctly then they are all towards the end of the chapter. But I would read it all just to familiarise yourselves with the story. Also I will only update the 2nd chapter if people are still interested, so leave me a review if you are and I'll update again. Sorry about the wait, but here you go…
Chapter 1 – Savannah's POV.
After a long and tiring day with Tim and Alan, I needed some time to myself. I knew exactly where I wanted to go and why – I wanted to go outside. After telling Tim that I was going for a walk, I headed outside. The moon was high up in the sky, but there was cloud cover. But I knew it was a full moon... It was a full moon and my heart was aching, aching for my one and only true love.
I squinted my left eye shut and held up my thumb, noticing like every time that my thumb covered the moon. This is what I did at every full moon. Although my heart ached every time, I still did it. It was my way of remembering the best two weeks of my life; it was my way of remembering John Tyree.
"Oh John." The words slipped out of my mouth and I whimpered. All of a sudden I felt a chill of excitement and my heart rate was picking up rapidly. I don't know why, and I don't know how, but I felt the presence of John. I know realistically he wouldn't be there in the dark watching the moon like I was. But my heart was telling me otherwise and I squinted my eyes trying to look out for anyone... Suddenly, my heart rate picked up again as I thought I saw someone, but my eyes gave out and I blinked and when I looked again there was nothing there. My heart ached with pain and all I could think about was John. In my heart and soul I always knew and will continue forever knowing that he is my one and only true love.
Now don't get me wrong, I do love Tim, but I don't love him like I love John. But the fact is I made my choice, I married Tim and thanks to a miracle, he is well and living. It wasn't that long ago that all the towns people including myself, thought that he was going to die. We did have collections and we had people chipping in donations to try and get extensive treatment for Tim, but I knew that no matter how much people gave, it wouldn't be anywhere near as much as we needed. It was on one sunny afternoon when all our prayers were answered. It was that sunny afternoon that I got a phone call from my bank saying someone anonymous donated a large amount of money to help with Tim's treatment and wanted to keep on checking on Tim's progress. When I say a large amount of money, I mean a large amount of money - $500,000 to be exact. When I finished on the phone with the bank, I made a silent prayer of thanks to the anonymous person (who I had no idea was – well not until later, but I'll get to that point in a little while) and I got in my car and drove to the hospital as quick as I could to deliver the good news to Tim!
It took a couple of months to get Tim out and transferred and then for his treatment which lasted another couple of months. But through all that I was happy – I was happy that Tim would be getting better. And yeah, Ok I did think of John, but my mind was occupied with Tim's recovery.
Before the treatment started, heck before the donation was even made, I was in pain. The pain doubled when John visited and then left with the words he had sad to me. Yes he may have done it for my best interest and to keep me happy, but those words and the way he said them – he was so distant he was so cold and I hated him for that. I know I had no right to after what I did to him, but I did. That's just the way it was. But now, now I can't say that I feel the same. How can I hate him – He's the love of my life. Isn't it funny how things turn out though?
John had said that Tim was better a better man than he ever was and that he wished he could be more like Tim. Did he not understand that I love him, John the way he was, did he not understand that he was more than and better than Tim, did he not know that I loved him more?
Just before he had left, I know that he and Tim had a chat, and whatever Tim had said must have upset him. If only I knew what Tim and John had said, but I guess I will never know. It was after he came out of the hospital that he had said those things that made me hate him. But don't get me wrong I still loved him with all my heart and always will do. It was after that that we said our goodbyes for a final time and I knew that I would be seeing him for the last time.
Every time I think of that my heart aches and I feel it breaking bit by bit. And I shed tears with the pain I feel knowing that I wouldn't be seeing John ever again. In a way that is a lie, as there are times when I can picture him clearly, these are times when I'm at the beach or when I'm looking up at the full moon. But I know that I will never physically see him again. So it wasn't really the same and my heart ached at that.
Once it had been a couple of weeks that Tim had been home recovering, I had decided that I would go and see John and let him know of Tim's recovery and to try to get him to see for himself. I thought that he would be staying at his father's house even knowing that his dad had died. But once I had pulled up outside the old house, I noticed a 'sold' sign. I don't know why, but I had a feeling that I knew exactly where that large amount of donation came from. It didn't take me long to put two and two together. Knowing John, he had sold his father's coin collection – I knew John wasn't a big fan of the collection. I also knew how big the coin collection was and that it would have been worth at least $400,000. Like I said, it didn't take long for me to put two and two together, it didn't take me long to realise that John had made that large donation. At this, my heart swelled with joy and sadness knowing that John did this all for me and Tim just to make sure that we had a longer and happier life together and for a brighter future for me, Tim and Alan.
A cold drift of wind made me shudder and I was brought back to my senses. I could tell my cheeks were wet and moist as I went to brush away my hair from my face and that is when I realised that I had been crying at remembering all of this.
I knew it was time that I went back inside – and I don't know why but I looked up to the moon again and I apologised to John. I thought that by saying it out loud will make it seem more real. Looking up at the moon i said these words with tears and sobs combined with them;
"John, I know you're not here with me right now but i just want you to know how sorry I am, I want you to know that I now know I made a mistake in not waiting for you, I want you to know that I know I made a mistake in marrying Tim... I want you to know how much I still love you..."
At this point, I was sobbing really hard and my words were being choked out.;
"I know it was you who had made that anonymous donation and I want to say thank you. I want to tell you so much, but you're not here. I want to feel your warm and protecting arms around me again. Surely you must know how I always come out and look at the full moon when it's out and just think of you. My heart is breaking to pieces due to the fact that I can't have you... But all I want to say finally is how much I love you with all my heart and how you were my one and only true love. Goodbye John Tyree, I love you always and forever..."
With that, I turned to walk back inside-
"And yet, your love doesn't mean anything to me anymore…"
Am I dreaming, or did I just hear John Tyree's voice?