Disclaimer: I am not the legal owner of Harry Potter nor am I the owner of anything that is written in the Harry Potter series.
A/N: I haven't been here in while, I know. School, work and adult issues such and romantic relationships going sour preoccupied my mind. While I'm still working on my on-going stories (I haven't abandoned them all), I give you this one instead. It is based on the amazingly wonderful Marian Keyes' novel Watermelon. If you haven't read anything of her, you should and you should do it as soon as possible, she fabulous.
I hope I'd be able to update this on a more frequent pace but if not, do bear it with me.
Many thank and happy reading.
They say that a woman is most beautiful when pregnant. I have to disagree. I felt I was anything but beautiful. Nor did I feel I was glowing or radiating as the months passed by and I got bigger and bigger. By the time I was about to give birth whenever someone told me I was beautiful I'd say "as a Victorian townhouse" , they would laugh but I was dead serious.
You probably think I'm just overreacting, over-emotional and jam-packed with hormones thanks to the baby I just gave birth too. Which direct me to another issue – giving birth is a fucked up ordeal. It's not a miracle, the world doesn't go black for thirty seconds as in this muggle television shows and the next moment I'm holding a baby in my arms, my face freshly made up and I'm fit and ready to go. No. It is agonizing pain, your vagina is stretched, ripped and you are bleeding by the gallons. You're also shitting yourself quite a bit, and this is the last time I'd ever mention it. By the time you are ready to pop this parasite out you are exhausted, worn-out and figures why not call it a day? Oh right, you can't.
I know it may seem like I'm the bitterest woman on earth who gave birth but in reality I'm just saying it as it is. I will tell you this, giving birth to a baby, while awfully horrendous and body damaging is also a thrilling, amazing, and overwhelming and I'd do it all over again.
Of course, I did just give birth to a baby girl but I'm also a newly born single mum. Yup, you got it right – my husband just left me not just for another woman, but for another married woman whom he was having an affair for the past nine months, yes I know, ironic.
I just woke up from my slumber, after twenty eight and a half hours of contractions I was finally done with carrying and delivering my first born. Lysander set on the edge of my bed. It looked like he had recently showered.
"Good, you're up." He got up from where he set and stood there, keeping a distance. "We need to talk." He was very polite and formal.
"Have you seen her?" I tried to prop myself on the bed in a way that won't hurt as much. I failed. "I'm still not sure I know what to call her, but isn't she beautiful? oh Merlin my back hurts."
"No, I haven't seen her." He said shortly. "Listen, Lily-"
"Am I supposed to ask the healer to bring her for her feeding or they just know?"
"Have you flooed my parents? Are they coming?"
"Lily, I'm leaving." Lysander said firmly.
"Why?" I was finally in a good position that didn't hurt my back. I snuggled back into my pillows and gave him a small smile. "You only just arrived." I know I should've known better but I was tired and somewhat foolish to see where this was going.
"Lily, listen to me," Lysander said, getting a bit restless. "I'm leaving you."
"What?" I said slowly, trying to understand what is going on.
"Lily, I'm really sorry, but I've met someone else and I'm going to be with her and I'm sorry about the baby and to leave you like this and everything, but I must." He blurted out, not looking at me for one second ,but his face, as I studied it from my bed, looked anguished stricken.
"What do you mean you've met someone else?" I asked, still grasping at things.
"I…errr….mean that I've…well…I've fallen in love with someone else."
"You mean another woman or something?"
"Yes." He said looked at his shoes, at his watch, at the wall, at anything than my eyes.
"Don't you love me anymore?" I asked in a small voice.
"I don't know." He ran a hand in his hair. "I don't think so." He replied.
"And you are leaving me?" I repeated the underline of this conversation. He nodded silently. "But what about the baby?" I asked, stunned. He could leave me and that's alright but he couldn't leave me when we just had a baby together. "You've got to care of her, to take care of the two of us."
"I'm sorry, I can't." he said. "I'll make sure she's comfortable and it's not like you can't take care of her financially but I will help and we'll sort something out about the flat and the joint Gringotts account. I'm sorry but I have to go."
I was outsmarted by him. I couldn't believe we were having this conversation yet there I was lying in bed discussing financial arrangements from my now estranged husband. We should be cooing over our little baby girl but instead of arguing if she got my Dad's eyes or his mother's dreamy features, Lysander, my Lysander, is leaving me. I need someone in charge to complain about what is going on here. Maybe he got jinxed or confounded to believe he didn't love me anymore. However, one look at him and I know he wasn't hurt by magic whatsoever. This isn't what I expected when I came here.
"Merlin, Lily," he said. "I hate to leave you like this. But if I came home with you and the baby I won't be able to leave."
"Isn't that the whole idea?" I asked, bewildered. "Isn't that the whole concept of marriage?"
"I know that there's no good time to tell you something like this. I couldn't tell you when you were pregnant, what if something had happen to the baby? So I have to tell you now."
"Why were you at the birth, if you planned to leave me the minute it was over?" I asked him.
"Yes, I know." He said hurriedly. "It's because I promised."
"Because you promised?" I was trying to make sense of what he just said. "But you've promised me lots of other things, Lysander, like to be with me in sickness and in health, to cherish and love me till death do us apart."
"Well, I'm sorry," he said. "But I can't keep those promises."
"So what's going to happen?" I asked numbly. I figured that I kept him talking I might be able to change his mind and make him see how silly he was being. I guess its part of that muggle notion that the band keeps on playing even when the ship is sinking. I refused to accept the he was leaving, no. by the end of this so called conversation we will talk about prepping the baby's new room and how he was going to pick us up two days from now. There will be no more of this nonsense.
He stood up. I noticed how far he stood away from me, I won't be able to touch him, and he knew I'd be trying to physically reach him out if not only emotionally. He was wearing his best robes, the dark blue ones and he looked grim and very pale and he was never more handsome to me that moment as he was since I knew him.
"Hot date?" I asked bitterly.
He didn't even smile attempt a smile and I knew then and there that I had lost him. He looked like Lysander, sounded much like Lysander and even smelled like Lysander, but it was him.
"I've moved out most of my things." He said. "I'll be in touch. Take care of yourself."
He turned on his heel and quickly and quietly left the ward. I might say he almost broke into a run. I wanted run after him but I was bed-bound courtesy to having just given birth.
Somewhere in the distance I could hear a baby crying and I knew without the shadow of a doubt that it was mine. It was time for me to feed her but my mind was processing everything. I was stunned, heartbroken, horrified, shocked and disbelieving.
He was gone.