The Night of Neglect fundraiser is a complete and utter bust with the exception of that creeper Ryerson being so moved by Mercedes that he made a generous donation. But it wasn't generous enough. They could afford to fly all of New Directions to New York but they had enough to rent an RV with a detachable annex for about 2 weeks.
So the completely ill thought-out plan is to attach the RV to Puck's truck with him driving (because nobody but Puck drive's his tuck), while the left over gleeks plus Mr. Schue ride in the RV. Yet for some bizarre reason Figgins and all their parents agrees with plan. The only snag in this plan is figuring out who is going to ride shot gun.
See Puck wants to be left alone. He can listen to whatever music he wants to, he doesn't have to try and make small talk, he can just drive. Maybe pretend he's getting out of that cow town to somewhere far, far away where he can make something of himself and show all those losers who doubted him. But it seems like the gleeks have other plans. All week Rachel Berry has been rambling on and on and on about 'How we have to cease this opportunity to gain as much practice time as we possibly can!' Everyone else, not having a bar of it.
"No way am I spending to next few day listing to your annoying voice while I am trapped in a confined space! It's bad enough that I have to be stuck with those losers! I sure as hell, don't wanna listen to you sing freakin' show tunes all day!" Santana screeches before they board the RV. Mr. Schue has popped back into the school to pick up some paper work he forgot to gab before leaving the rest of them to indulge in their favorite pass time, rip into Rachel Berry. Rachel's eyes go wide and she pulls that tight look on her face she gets when she's trying to not show the hurt.
"Guys…" Finn starts up as he helps Mike, Sam and Puck pack some of their luggage into the bed of Puck's truck.
"Shut it blubber butt! Do you really wanna listen to Streisand?" Santana bits back.
"Well… um… I guess… no?" He mumbles out, withering under the steely gaze of one determined Latina.
"Fine then, I just won't talk or sing the next few days. I can be quiet." Rachel offers calmly. Her dad's always taught her to be the bigger person. She's trying to keep the peace; nobody wants what happened at sectionals to occur again. They're so close to winning, to kicking Vocal Adrenaline's ass, to proving themselves. Rachel thinks if it takes curling up in a ball, listening to her iPod and pretending to be invisible she can do it. She can not be a glee control freak.
"No." Santana states plainly. "You can't keep that trout mouth of yours shut for five minutes let alone five days! You sit up front with Puckerman." Puck goes to open his mouth in protest but Satan herself cuts him off before he gets a chance.
"It won't be so bad. Remember, he 'kind of likes you'" She sneers at him before flipping he long dark locks over her shoulder and struts onto the RV. No one really says anything else, either in fear of going against Santana or not really wanting to hang around Rachel for long periods to time. Kurt gives her an apologetic look but says nothing, Finn has his strange kind of constipated look on his face, he huffs a bit and gets on the RV too leaving Puck and Rachel alone.
She turns to face him with large sad looking doe eyes. Puck digs his foot into the ground a little. Puck hates that look. He really, really hates it. Because truth be told he has always kind of had a soft spot for her. Rachel is a good person, occasionally misguided but she's never done anything malicious or cruel to any one just for the fun of it like Quinn or Santana have.
"Hey, who need 'em eh? Us Jews gotta stick together, am I right?" He throws an arm around her shoulder and shoots her a crooked smile. She sniffs a little and gives him a small smile.
"Thanks Noah." She says in soft voice. Schue finally appears again having apparently found what he was looking for. He looks around confusion marring his face when he only sees Puck and Rachel standing by the truck.
"Rachel where is everyone? I thought I told you all to wait here?" Shue lets out an exasperated sigh thinking that this trip hasn't even begun yet and if he can keep track of the club before they've even set off what will the rest of this trip be like?
"They're all ready on board Mr. Schue! We're all just really excited to go!" Rachel peps out with fake enthusiasm, at this Schue's face instantly brightens.
"That's the spirit I'm looking for! Alright guys! Come on Rachel hop on board!" Schue goes to usher Rachel onto the RV.
"Um, if it's cool with you Schue Berry's gonna sit up front with me. Keep me company and stuff so I don't get lonely." Puck cuts in, he's not going to leave Rachel with those jerks, he also doesn't want Satan bitching him out later.
"That's fine with me Puck. I guess I'll see you two in a few hours when we stop for a break. Have fun!" Schue cheerily calls out while climbing up the RV steps shutting the door behind him. Puck turns and walks to the passenger side door, holding it open for Rachel.
"Besides," He says helping her up into the cabin. "How much fun are they really gonna be having stuck with Schue?"
As Puck begins to pull out of the McKinley car park he decides to lay some rules down. He might not be a jerk and throw her to the wolves but he's not going to let her boss him around in his own truck, plus he out right refuses to listen to any song from a musical.
"Ok Berry here are some rules for riding shot gun with El Puckerone."
"Ew Noah really? El Puckerone?"
"Just shut up and listen Berry. 1. Driver picks the music, shot gun shuts their cake hole-"
"Did you steal that line from Supernatural?" Puck is momentarily stunned.
"You watch Supernatural?" He asks a little shocked; he would not have picked a girl like Rachel Berry to be a fan of anything outside the genre of musicals and romance.
"Yes Puck. Is that so hard to believe?" She shoots back at him.
"Um… Yeah kind of." He's still in shock, Berry a Supernatural fan. Puck's got to admit that it's kind of hot.
"What are the rest of the rules Noah?" Rachel sighs out.
"Oh yeah right. 1. Driver picks the music. Just hands off my radio, ok? 2. No side seat driving. My Ma does that every time she's in the god damn car with me. 3. There will be car games. This is a road trip and no long boring ass car ride is complete with out at least a couple of rounds of Slug Bug. That games the shit." Puck notices the corners of Rachel's mouth begin to curl up at this.
"I think I can live with that Noah. I never had any sibling to play car games with so this will be a good experience for me."
"Well Berry this is gonna be they best frickin' trip ever. Just you see." Both look over at each other with wide smiles on their faces as Puck switches the radio on.
"OW! Jesus Christ Rachel! Who taught you to punch like that? Sugar Ray?"
"Daddy thinks that it is vital that I know how to defend my self, especially if I'm going to live in New York. I can box, I know taekwondo and I can even fire a shot gun!"
"Puck? Puck? Noah?"
"Holy crap Berry!"
"What's rule numero uno Berry?" Puck barks out when he sees Rachel's hand heading for the stereo.
"I believe I can veto that rule Noah. Friends don't let friends listen to Nickelback." Rachel clips back snarkly. Puck's laughter rings out through the trucks cabin.
"Touché Berry" He doesn't say anything when she changes the station.
Puck sees the Beetle before Rachel does. They've been driving for about 3 hours and Puck figures they should pull over for a break at the diner up ahead as his leg is getting stiff. He gets an idea when he sees the bug. Puck can't hit a girl, he's knows from very painful experience that Rachel can look after herself but he just can even bring himself to even tap her shoulder. So he pulls his truck over at the diner/rest stop.
"Kiss Bug!" Puck says and before Rachel can react, he presses his lips to hers. She lets out a small squeak and momentarily freezes before relaxing into the kiss. But as quickly as the kiss started Puck ended it.
"Told you we'd have fun Berry. Come on, I'm fuckin' starved." Throwing a smirk at a stunned Rachel Puck quickly hops out the truck and begins walking towards the diner entrance. Rachel needs a moment to gather herself after what just happened. Puck- no Noah just kissed her. Rachel's trying to wrap her head around this, wrap her head around what he possessed him to do so. She suddenly ripped out of her revere by Puck hollering at her from the doorway of the diner as the other gleeks begin to emerge from the RV. Rachel hops out of the truck scurrying into the diner behind Tina and Mike. Her mind is still on that kiss.
The diner has a real home style country feel to it, like it's trying to create a home away from home for weary travelers. Rachel slips into a booth by herself figuring that if no one wanted her in the RV then no one is going to want to eat with her. She's scanning the menu for any vegan options when she feels someone plop down into the seat across from her. To her surprise Puck is sitting across staring at his menu.
"What are you doing?" She asks him, honestly surprised that he would want to spend more time with her then he really had to. She's under no illusion that she is easy to be around, she has been told on numerous occasions by her "friends" that she is annoying. But her lips are still tingling from the memory of that kiss so she thinks he must 'kind of like her' at least.
"Sitting" Puck grunts out. Rachel doesn't say any thing at this but smiles to herself. They sit in a relatively comfortable silence neither of them mentioning the kiss. When the waitress arrives at their table Rachel has finally decided on the stack of vegan pancakes they offer with a glass of orange juice, while Puck also orders the pancakes he also orders the bacon and scrabbled eggs with double bacon, a slice of their home made apple pie and to wash it all down with a coffee. Rachel crinkles her nose in disgust as the waitress walks away to take some of the other gleeks orders. Puck rolls his eyes at her.
"You're just as bad as my Ma, yeah I'm a bad Jew but I love bacon. I don't pick on your rabbit food so just lay off my bacon!" He digs at her all in good humor, Puck smiles at her. Rachel doesn't know why Puck had decided to be so nice to her, take her under his wing but she thinks that she just might enjoy this trip if Puck's by her side. They make small talk and each other laugh none of the others bothering to talk to them until Finn decides to burst their bubble.
"Hey Rach!" Finn lumbers up awkwardly to the pair ignoring Puck.
"Oh hello Finn, are you enjoying the trip so far?" Rachel asks being as polite as ever but Puck can see her putting up walls.
"Yeah it's alright. Hey I'm sorry about this morning-"
"It's ok Finn." Rachel raises her hand cutting him off.
"Yeah Hudson, Berry's a kick ass shot gun. She's the Goose to my Maverick." Puck chips in, annoyed at Finn's presence.
"Didn't Goose die?" Rachel queries, turning back to face him and ignoring Finn.
"Not the point Berry! You're my badass wingwoman!" He teases her making her laugh. Her laugh is not what you would expect. A girl like Rachel should have a light musical sounding laugh but this Rachel, the Rachel who is letting her guard down around him has a laugh like an angel who was told a dirty joke. Puck thinks he likes this more then those fake dainty laughs girls put on to try and impress guys.
"Um, Rach…" Finn tries to worm his way back into the convocation, not liking the way Puck and Rachel are looking at each other.
"I'm sorry Finn I forgot you were still there for a moment." She says as sweet as ever.
"That's cool Rach, look I –" Finn is once again cut off when their waitress arrives with a mountain of food for them.
"Thanks for stopping by bro! See ya later!" Puck says with fake enthusiasm trying to get the point across that to his dimwitted ex-best friend that he was no longer welcome.
"I'll talk to you later Finn." And with that Finn dejectedly walks away back to his table of Santana, Brittney, Quinn, Sam and Artie.
"Puck wanna kill the hobbit yet?" Santana laughs at her own bitchy joke as Finn takes his seat at the table.
"No." Finn says sadly, looking over at a happy smiling Rachel.
They've just gotten back on the road again when Rachel squeals and turns up the radio.
"I LOVE this song Noah!" She claps he hands together excitedly, Puck can't help but smile at her, and he has to admit it's pretty damn cute. He can't help but raise an eyebrow at her when he realises what song it actually is.
"I never took you for a Def Leppard fan Berry"
"I have very eclectic tastes Noah, thank you very much."
"Ec-what? I don't know what that means!"
"Just sing along Noah. Love is like a bomb, baby, c'mon get it on. Livin' like a lover with a radar phone! Come on sing! You know you want to!" She teases him in a sing song voice. Puck can't help but laugh at her. Who would have though that he would get to see Rachel 'Prude' Berry belting out 'Pour Some Sugar On Me'.
"Razzle 'n' a dazzle 'n' a flash a little light. Television lover, baby, go all night" Puck sings along with Joe Elliott. Rachel lets out a loud cheer as he joins in.
"Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet. Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah" Rachel follows up.
"Hey!" Puck shouts. Then they both sing together for the bridge and chorus.
"C'mon, take a bottle, shake it up. Break the bubble, break it up. Pour some sugar on me! Ooh, in the name of love! Pour some sugar on me! C'mon, fire me up! Pour your sugar on me! Oh, I can't get enough!"
They haven't seen another Beetle since the one Puck saw at the diner. The score currently stands a one all. Then he sees it. The rusty old frame of a beat up classic VW Beetle sitting at the edge of some field; it was like a gift from god. The good Lord sent him a sign once back in sophomore year about Rachel and he's sending Puck one now and Puck is not one to ignore god. But it seemed god had other plans.
"KISS BUG!" Puck yell at the same time Rachel yells
"SLUG BUG!" It all happens so quickly, Puck turns to kiss Rachel, while Rachel turns to punch Puck. Their lips collide together while Rachel's fist collides with Puck's chest. Sparks fly momentarily until Puck cries out in pain at Rachel's hit. Puck swerves the wheel of the truck; Rachel thinks quickly grabbing the wheel guiding them back on to the right side of the road again. Puck leans back rubbing his chest.
"Well you definitely float like a butterfly and sting like a bee Berry." Puck wheezes out.
"While I appreciate the compliment on my boxing skills, I would greatly appreciate it if you could take the wheel again as I don't think it's very safe for us to be driving like this." Rachel squeaks out eyes wide with terror.
"Oh shit Rach! Sorry!" Puck takes carefully the steering wheel back from Rachel.
"I am so sorry Noah! I didn't mean to hurt you like that. Are you sure you're ok?" Rachel says quickly rubbing her hand over the part of Puck's chest she hit. Puck's not going to complain when a hot girl is rubbing any part of him.
"It's cool Berry, don't sweat it. I've had worse injuries playing football so don't you worry your pretty little head about it." And he's not lying, sure her punch hurt like hell but so does any hit you're not expecting.
"As long as you're sure Noah..."
"Yeah I'm sure Berry." Their moment is quickly broken by the sound of Rachel's phone ringing.
"Why's Schue call you Berry?" Puck asks looking over at her phone reading her caller i.d.
"Oh no! The others in the back! They must have felt us swerve!" Rachel cries out in panic. She takes the call reassuring Mr. Schue that everything is alright; they just swerved to miss an animal running across the rode in front of them. He must buy the lie as Rachel is hanging up on him only seconds later.
"Maybe we should lay off the slugging in slug bug and stick to my favorite version kiss bug Berry. Don't know if I could face another round against your cute little hands." Puck's trying to be smooth and he thinks it might be working by the blush he sees creeping up from her chest stopping at her cheeks.
"I think I like your version better too" And Puck will take that as a win.
"Tell me something about you that no one else knows." Rachel comes out with randomly; they haven't really been talking just singing along to some classic rock station they picked up when they entered whatever state they're in now.
"Um like what do you wanna know? I don't really have much going on that's a secret." Puck's wondering what brought on this little bonding session. If she wants to bond he can think of plenty of awesome ways other then swapping secrets like a couple of his sister's friends.
"Just anything you've never told someone before. Big or small, just something."
"Ok… Ah, I have a half brother. I don't really know much about him, we've never met, just his name's Jake he's younger then me but older then Becca. He's also the reason my piece of rubbish dad left." Puck looks over at Rachel; he didn't really mean to blurt out that much. But she just looks at him with these soft kind eyes that make him feel safe and that if he was finally going to sharing about Jake Rachel was the right person to share it with. Rachel can see by the look on Puck's face that telling her about his secret half brother wasn't easy and that he really doesn't want to talk about it any more right now, it was enough for him to share that.
"What about you Berry? Any deep dark secrets you hiding from us?" He teases her thankful for her not pushing the topic of his half brother.
"Um well I have these two friends who don't go to McKinley and aren't into show choir but if the rest of New Directions found out would never let me hear the end of it." Rachel says softly.
"Gee Berry who the hell are your friends?" Now Puck's curious. It's not hard to get most of the gleeks panties in a twist but still, he really wants to know who these people are.
"Well when I was dating Jesse last year I got to know his brother and sister. Even when Jesse and I broke up I still kept in touch with them. Not so much with Jude, that's his younger brother. He's been in and out of rehab a lot but I talk to Jamie every week still." Puck just absorbs everything she just said. He can totally see why the gleeks would have a shit fit. But he's happy for her, he's glad she has some friends away the glee clubs sometimes toxic environment.
"Wait," Puck says after a moment. "Jesse's sister's name is Jamie St. James?" Rachel lets out one of her dirty angel laughs again.
"Out of everything I just said, THAT is what you pick up on?" She keeps laughing at him tears of laughter rolling down her face. Puck can't help just laugh with her.
"Well, yeah you've gotta admit it's pretty funny."
"Jamie told me that they're all named after a song. Jesse was named after Rick Springfield's Jesse's Girl, Jude was the Beatles' Hey Jude and Jamie was named after Van Halen's Jamie's Cryin'."
"Oh my god! It get's better! She's named after a song about a girl regreting a one night stand!" Puck's sides are hurting from how much he's been laughing, out of the corner of his eye he can see Rachel's face is pretty red from laughter too. She lightly slaps his shoulder.
"Shut up Puckerman!"
"Oh, whoa, whoa, Jamie's cryin'!"
"You're never going to get over this are you?"
"What do you think?"
They stop again for a lunch and bathroom break in a town much smaller them Lima. Rachel's glad she never grew up in a town this size. She would have gone crazy long ago; then again some of her team mates would argue she is already crazy.
They eat at another diner; this one is not as nice as the last. It's a bit more worn and tired looking, and there seems to be an obscene amount of linoleum. But they are all to tired and hungry to care about the décor of the place, well all but Kurt who can be heard making plans for a complete refurbishment under his breath.
Rachel sits with Puck again left alone by the rest of the group, Finn doesn't try to talk to Rachel again he just sit at his table and stares sadly at her with a look like someone kicked his puppy. But Puck and Rachel are once again in their own little bubble and take no notice.
This diner has no vegan options but Rachel's used to that, she can accommodate when necessary. Lunch is fairly uneventful with the exception of Puck almost getting them thrown out after making a particularly crude joke at their elderly waitress. Just before they are about to leave Mr. Schue approaches their table.
"Hey Puck, I just wanted to talk to you about a few things." He says spreading a map of on their table, there is a red line following the route they have been taking from Lima to New York, along the way a few towns have been highlighted. Rachel vaguely listens to them talk about the time they are making and what time Schue wants to stop for dinner and where they will be staying the night tonight but the next night they need to drive through the night but the night after that they will be making another overnight stop to rest up. Puck tells Schue that he's happy with the plan as long as he has his wingwoman Goose with him. Rachel rolls her eyes at the ridiculous nickname she seems to have picked up, but out of all the names she has been called in the past, this has to be one of her favorites. Schue gives the pair a confused look but says nothing.
"Well," Puck started, pushing his chair away from the table "If we wanna make it before dark then we better haul ass then" As Rachel moved around the table Puck threw his arm around her shoulder.
"Come on Goose! We've got to serious road to burn! You've lost that loving feeling, oh that loving feeling" Puck sings out making Rachel giggle.
"Noah!" She jokingly scolds him lightly slapping his chest.
"You've lost that loving feeling, now it's gone, gone, gone!" He keeps singing to her ignoring her remark.
"I think I preferred Jamie's Cryin'"
From across the diner Finn glares at the couple.
After being on the road again for about an hour Rachel turns to face him.
"I'm really glad we're getting to spend time together on this trip. I know that sometimes I can be difficult but I've really enjoyed spending time with you."
"Me too Berry. You're pretty badass you know." And he's not even lying. Puck thinks that the rest of the gleeks are the ones who are missing out on all the fun, because Rachel Berry is kind of kick ass on road trips.
That night as Rachel was lying on her bunk in the RV, they had parked in a campground for the night, she thought back over her day so far. She thought about Puck opening up to her, letting her see sides of him that he had never let anyone else see and being so willing to let her ride shot gun. He made this trip really special for her; Rachel was expecting to feel like a constant 5th wheel but Puck- no Noah, Rachel has been spending time with Noah not Puck, Noah has made her feel like she is a part of something special.
Over in his Puck is thinking about his day too. About how much fun he was having with Rachel. He was getting to see a side of her he rarely ever got to see. He wonders if people had got to see this side of her from the start then things would be different. Maybe she would have been one of the popular crowd, maybe she would have been one of the Cheerio's. Puck thinks maybe it's not just her that has changed but him too, and surprisingly he's okay with that. He likes the person he is with her.
And both think about those all too brief kisses their shared. Rachel's tingling lips serving as a reminder for a moments she knows she won't forget.
The next day has been pretty low key so far. They have just been singing along to the radio all morning. Puck's surprised at how many of the songs she knew the words too, who knew Rachel Berry was a Pantera and Rush fan?
"You can't be something you're not. Be yourself, by yourself. Stay away from me." Rachel sing the heavy metal song with far more sweetness then any heavy metal song should ever be sung with but he gives her massive props none the less.
"I wish we could do songs like this, but I doubt Schue would be cool with it." Puck laments.
"Well have you ever asked him?" She queries. "If you never ask then you'll never know Noah. If you want something then you should just go for it, demand it. The others may believe me to be annoying and pushy but if I wasn't I would never get what I want. I would be just like Mercedes and Tina, who complain about never getting what they want but never just reaching out and taking it. Like every thing in life Noah, hoping can only get you so far." Puck thinks about this for a moment. It makes sense, it does. If he wants something he should just go for it, so then and there he decides, before they get back to Lima, Rachel Barbara Berry is going to be his.
Rachel thinks it can't be good that it's only day 2 of their tip and she's completely over diner food. She's sitting there alone at her and Puck's booth, while he is in the bathroom, she is poking her very limp looking salad with a fork thinking that the Simpson's may have been right, you don't win friends with salad especially if the salad is as bad as this one. Out of the corner of her eye she can see Finn making his way over to her, Rachel groans internally. It's no that she doesn't like Finn, it's just she has finally managed to get over him. He will always hold a special in her heart just not all of her heart. But Finn has that look on his face, she recognises it from when she was dating Jesse and Finn decided he wanted her back. He wants her back and she doesn't want him.
"Hey Rach, we haven't really had a chance to talk yet have we?" He's doing that sweet dopey act she used to find so sweet and charming.
"No, I guess we haven't. With you in the RV and me in the truck we haven't had the chance to spend much time together." Rachel's trying to be polite, but she can't help but wish Puck would hurry back from the toilet.
"So, you and Puck have been spending a lot of time together." Rachel can tell he's trying to be smooth, and failing spectacularly at it.
"Yes well that will happen when you are the only two in the truck and Santana has managed to bully everyone into keeping me out of the RV." She's not trying to be rude, she wants to maintain a friendship with him, if not that they can at least be civil with one another, but Finn is really starting to get on her last nerve.
"Yeah, sorry again about that-" She cut's off his weak at best attempt at an apology.
"Don't bother. I'm over it and sadly use to it." Truth is Rachel tired of his fake hero act.
"Everything ok here?" Puck asks a dark look marring his face. Rachel's face brightens instantly at his return.
"Not at all Noah! Finn was just leaving, weren't you Finn?" She gives him a tight smile letting him know this conversation was over.
"Sure Rach. Talk again later?" He asks hopefully.
"I don't think so Finn" And with that the conversation is over.
A few hours after lunch New Directions are having a break to stretch their legs at a rest stop, Finn approaches the group minus Rachel and Puck who are in the bathroom and Mr. Schue who is off making a call to Miss. Pillsbury.
"Guys!" He calls out, trying to catch all the gleeks attention.
"What is it Finn?" Kurt asks in a board voice, inspecting his nails.
"Don't you think we should let Rachel ride with us for a bit?" He tries to reason with the others.
"No Finnderella, I'm enjoying the peace and quiet." Santana spits back.
"But guys-" He pleads.
"Just let it go Finn." Quinn sighs as she gets back on the RV. Finn lets out a huff as the others all get back on not bothering to talk to him. Finn watches on sadly as Puck and Rachel head back to the truck, neither paying him any attention.
"You're driving a lot better then I expected Berry." Puck finally relented to letting someone driving his baby. Rachel managed to convince him to let her drive for a while and let him nap a bit so he could drive them through the night.
"I have many skills you don't know about Noah. Being able to drive a stick just happens to be one of them." She states primly from the drivers seat.
"I'm discoverin' that babe." Puck says smirking at the blush he can see spreading over her cheeks. She likes the way he calls her babe, she knows she shouldn't like such a sexist term of endearment but it gives her a warm glow inside.
"I love to discover more of you." He says wiggling his eyebrows. Rachel just rolls her eyes at him for what feels like the millionth time.
"Just take a nap Noah. We need you fresh as a daisy for tonight." Puck just chuckles at this and makes himself comfy.
"'Night Berry." He says closing his eyes.
Everyone stared at Schue as he let out a loud snore, drool dribbling out of the corner of his mouth. Santana crinkled her nose in disgust, while Sam poked him a couple of time in the cheek.
"That be hella gross dog!" Artie piped up while Sam wiped his finger clean of Schue's saliva on his sweater vest.
"Who knew he could be so loud?" Mercedes quipped from the seat next to him.
"You know this is all Santana's fault." Finn stated looking around at the group.
"How the hell is it my fault?" Santana cried indigently. She resented being blamed for something that she clearly had no control over.
"Well we could have made Schue ride up front with Puck and had Rachel back here. I'd much rather be singing then listening to Mr. Schue snore for hours." The others all looked around at each other.
"He's is sort of right you know." Kurt finally chipped in. Finn could see some of the other gleeks begin to crack.
"Shut up fancy pants! The hobbit is not getting in this RV with me!" Santana shouts back at Kurt waking Schue up with a snort in the process. Finn figures he just needs to crack Santana and the rest will follow. The Rachel will spend time with him, want to be his girlfriend again, not Jesse St. Jerkface and defiantly not Puck.
Puck takes the wheel back again after dinner, thankful that Rachel let him get at least a few hours sleep before the overnight haul.
"You know something," Puck suddenly states out of the blue. Rachel picks he head up from leaning against the window to look over at him.
"What?" She says a bit sleepily.
"We haven't seen one Beetle all day." He feels disappointed at this; every time he sees a bug he takes that as a sign from god to keep macking on with a certain hot petit brunet.
"We haven't, have we? Damn." Puck internally cheers at this.
"Missing Puckzilla kisses there Princess?" Rachel flushes bright red at this.
"Maybe just a little." She says meekly biting her lip and looking at her lap.
"Can have that now can we?" And with that he leans over smacking another kiss against her soft skin on the apple of her cheek.
"Is that the best you got Puckerman?" Rachel takes Puck's face with two hand and plant another soft kiss on his lips. When she pulls away Puck keeps staring at her.
"Eyes on the road Noah. We don't want to crash now do we?" Puck averts his eyes back to the road wanting to avoid another scolding from the girl, when he gets another idea.
"It's starting to get pretty dark now Berry," If she's willing to play the kissing version of Slug Bug he's hoping she's willing to play this, because it will be completely epic.
"And it's going to get difficult to really see different cars," Rachel narrows her eyes at Puck wondering where the devious boy is going with this.
"Have you ever played padiddle before Berry?" Puck's face is a full blown smirk, while Rachel crinkles her brown in confusion.
"Padiddle? Is that even a word Noah? I've never heard it before."
"It's easy babe, when you see a car with a burn out headlight you punch the roof and yell padiddle," Puck began to explain. Rachel nodded her head up and down at this.
"Ok, that sounds easy enough."
"But wait, there's more-" Puck was cut off before he could go on.
"Do I get a free set of stake knives too?" She sassed back.
"Looky-here we have our selves a comedienne! No Berry what I was going to say was the person who missed the padiddle has to take one item of clothing off." Puck finished smugly.
"WHAT? No, way Noah Puckerman! I am not stripping down in front of you!" Rachel indignantly cries out.
"What are you chicken Berry? Is the great Rachel Berry backing out of a challenge? I never though I'd see the day! This will be a moment to tell my future children about!" He loves riling her up; she looks incredibly hot when she gets pissed off.
"Don't be ridiculous Noah! I'm not playing your childish game." A defiant Rachel stands up to his peer pressure. He knows from experience he can make her crack, plus Puck really wants to see first hand what she's got going on under those sweaters.
"Bock, bock, BOCOOOORK!"
"Are you making chicken noises at me?"
"If the shoe fits babe, if the shoe fit."
"Fine you win! I'll play piddle-paddle with you!"
"It's padiddle Berry."
"Whatever Puckerman, you are going down!"
"That's so unfair Noah! Your arms are much longer then mine! I can't hit the roof before you!" Rachel wines.
"Suck it up Princess, you lost so off with something!" Puck thinks this has to be the best idea he's ever had as Rachel unbuttons her sweater revealing a light camie underneath.
"Happy?" She spits out at hi.
"Very." He says with a lecherous smirk.
"Maybe he has a hairball?" Brittney offer helpfully as the gleeks all try to gently move Mr. Schue about to stop him from snoring but no wake him up.
"Lord Tubbington makes funny noises like when he's trying to cough up a hairball. And Mr. Schue is pretty hairy."
"I don't think Schue has a hairball Britt." Santana says softly to the girl lovingly stroking he blond hair.
"Again? Do you really want to see my underwear that badly Noah?" Rachel sighs as she slips off her shoes and socks, as Puck says he will count those as one garment together.
"If you're offering babe I ain't saying no."
"You love it." She can't lie, she kind of does.
"It's like the man swallowed a chainsaw! That noise is not natural!" Tina screams throwing a pillow over her face.
"Is it healthy for him to be making those noises?" Mike then whispers in his girlfriend's ear.
"Oh god!" Quinn screeches all of a sudden.
"Oh that is just nasty!" Mercedes follows up gagging a little.
"Did he just fart in his sleep?" Kurt whispers in horror moving as far away from Schue as possible in such a small space.
"So Santana," Finn says calmly turning to face towards the Latina.
"Don't you dare say a word Frankenteen." She spits out.
"I'm starting to agree with Finn, that having Rachel would have been the lesser of apparently two evils." Artie says, his voice muffled by his hand covering his nose and mouth trying to block out the smell. The majority of the gleeks nod their heads in agreement.
"Rachel smells much nicer then Schue." Brittney says innocently as their teacher lets out another fart.
"I wish I had a camera to record this." Lauren says snacking on some potato chips.
"I would love to see his face when he sees the footage."
"PADIDDLE! HA HA! Finally I am victorious!"
"Isn't that a kids show Berry?"
"How do you know that?"
"I have a little sister babe."
"Just lose the shirt Puckerman"
"Damn you Puckerman!"
"You were distracted by the guns weren't you Berry?"
"While they are lovely I can control myself Noah"
"Sure you can." Puck smarted back while Rachel pulled her camie over her head. Puck couldn't help but stare at her. He loved the way her smooth tan skin curved around her breasts. She was truly a natural beauty.
"Distracted by the girls Noah?" Rachel said with a smirk when she noticed Puck oggeling her beasts.
"I am going to kill him!" Santana muttered under her breath and grabbing the nearest pillow to smother Schue with.
"No San, no!" Brittney cried grabbing her best friend around the waste so she couldn't advance any further.
"It's 2 am Britt and ol' chainsaw face here is still going strong with no sign of stopping anytime soon." She snapped out.
"Maybe Finn was right San." Brittney says quietly enough for only her to hear.
"Maybe." Santana mutters dejectedly.
"No Noah!" Rachel clings desperately to her last remaining item of clothing besides her underwear, her skirt.
"You know the rules babe! Ditch the skirt Berry, I have clearly won." Rachel sights defeated as she shuffles awkwardly out of her skirt.
"You know what this calls for Berry?" Puck says mischievously at Rachel.
"I've paid my dues, Time after time," Puck begins to sing.
"Are you really going to do this?"
"I've done my sentence, But committed no crime, And bad mistakes, I've made a few"
"You're not going to stop are you?"
"I've had my share of sand kicked in my face, But I've come through. Come on babe join in you know you want too!" Puck says throwing an arm around Rachel's shoulder.
"We are the champions - my friends, And we'll keep on fighting - till the end!"
"OK! I give in! The dwarf can join the rest of us! I was wrong!" Santana finally concedes at about 4am when Scheue let out another loud snore.
"We'll let her know next time we stop." Finn says struggling to contain his excitement.
Rachel's eyes are beginning to flutter; she's struggling to keep them open and is constantly yawning. Puck just gently strokes her hair.
"Shhh, just lie down across the seat and sleep Princess.
"I'm not sleepy Noah." Rachel mumbles as she stretches out across the bench, using his lap as a pillow. Puck's dick twitches slightly at the close proximity for Rachel's face to his crotch. And who could blame him? Any heterosexual male would have the same reaction if they had a hot girl asleep in their lap dress only in a bra and panties.
"Sleep babe, I'll wake you up before we stop ok Princess?" Puck says brushing some hair out of her face.
"Goodnight Noah. Love you."
"'Night Rachel, love you too."
The next morning Puck has pulled into a rest stops a few miles outside of the nearest town.
"Babe. Babe. Hey Berry!" Puck calls out to Rachel shaking her shoulder gently. Rachel slowly wakes up rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"Good morning Noah." Rachel says shyly.
"Morning Princess, you might wanna get dressed before the rest of the gleeks show up, not that I'm complaining. If it were up to me you would stay like that all day." Puck says eyes raking over her body.
"Noah!" Rachel cries out quickly scrambling to get all of her clothes back on.
"Got nothing to be ashamed of Berry, you should be proud of that tight little body of yours Princess." Puck says getting out of the truck and walking around stretching his legs and back. Rachel soon joins him, full dressed much to Puck's disappointment. The pair wonders around the car park in a comfortable silence back of hands and tips of fingers brushing every so often as the other gleeks, looking tired and worse for wear after a night of no sleep, descend from the RV. Santana seeing the pair strides over forcefully, the other gleeks trailing behind her, not wanting to mess about with this any business any further.
"Oi hobbit!" Santana shouts as the couple turn around to see the group heading towards them.
"Good morning Santana. How can I help you this morning?" Rachel say as polite as ever.
"We were all talking last night," Tina starts off, looking around at the others.
"Oh you're too slow girl Chang! You can ride with us I guess Berry." Santana snaps out reluctantly.
"It's not the same without you Rach." Finn says trying to look sincere but in the end looking rather constipated.
"Oh well, um I don't know what to say." Rachel says with shock colouring her voice. Puck get a dark look on his face.
"Just say yes and get on the dam RV already. Schue can ride up front with Puck." Santana grunts out.
"You smell a lot nicer then Mr. Schue" Brittney blurts out randomly.
"Thank you. I think…" A confused Rachel replys.
"No." Puck grunts out. Every one's heads snap to look over at Puck who had had been silent the entire conversation..
"What?" Santana says shocked.
"I said no. None of you wanted Berry around and now you miss out. She is kick ass on road trips and she's mine. So you can all fuck off back to your little RV and suffer. Rachel. Is. Mine." At this he grabs Rachel around the waste and hauls her over his shoulder walking back to his truck. Her rips open the passenger side door and gently tosses Rachel into the cabin.
"Fuck you she's mine!" He shouts back at the other gleeks once more for effect, be for walking around the truck and climbing back in the drivers side.
"But… but…" Finn stutters out. Kurt walks up to his step brother patting him on the shoulder.
"Give it up Finn you lost." He says before walking off. Back in the truck Rachel leans over and a presses her lips to Puck's.
"Thank you Noah, that was sweet of you." She says brushing her hand over his cheek.
"Anything for you babe." He says with a soft smile. Puck starts up the truck, the radio coming to life with Kenny Loggins' Danger Zone blearing out the speakers.
"They're playing our song Goose!" Puck says with a smile while pulling on his aviators.
"You are such a tool!" Rachel laughs, pulling Puck in for another kiss.