Twilight does not belong to me, but the rest of this story does.
I slip the note under the ring on the dresser, running my thumb over the indentation it made on my ring finger, trying to ignore the ache in my heart and the nagging in my head that has kept me here, with him, for so long.
The hotel is room is quiet, dark, not different from how I've been living for God knows how long.
I bite my bottom lip.
Who would've thought? Who would have thought that so much could change in a small amount of time?
That he could change so much?
I'm not the type of girl that takes these decisions lightly, I never have.
And I really thought it would be Edward and I forever, I really did. Everyone did.
Until this happened.
I tried so much to give it a go. To remember how it used to be.
But all I feel now is pain, heated anger… betrayal.
Everything just… hurts.
I turn before I change my mind, blinking as the cold light of the corridor hits me. Tears sting the corners of my eyes.
- xxxxxxxxxx -
There's something strangely alluring about the chemical smell of the Science lab.
I mean it's not something I would actually say to someone…but I can say it in my head and it doesn't sound as geeky you know?
I look through the microscope and list down the phase of mitosis the onion skin has gone through.
I normally tell Alice that this extra time in the lab is a pain because she would be highly offended if I ever tell her that I sometimes prefer to spend time dissecting an onion rather than hear her talk through her boy issues.
Hey, I love boy gossip as much as the next fifteen year old, but seriously, every boy doesn't warrant a prescription of Prozac. Most of them were high school jerks anyway.
I light the Bunsen burner and I don't notice him until the stool opposite me scrapes against the tiled floor.
"Hey, I'm sorry, did I startle you?"
"Hi, no, I just didn't hear you."
It's Edward Cullen. He pulls off his ruck-sack and places it on the table between us as he makes himself comfortable opposite me. He's in my biology class and we've not really talked apart from a few times a couple of months back when we were paired for an assignment. Boy, what a joy that was.
Everybody knows Edward Cullen though. Or at least has an opinion on him.
He's pretty much the lead in every single school play and rumour has it he's clinched some top shot modelling deal with some agency in Los Angeles. There's always some type of gathering around him, most of them girls who want in his pants.
I don't know much about him, apart from what people say. And people say a lot. Probably more than I want to hear.
Apparently he's hot and cute and oh, so funny.
I suppose when you get over the crazy, scruffy hair and kinda tilt your head to side he is a tiny bit cute…
"So this is the place to find Bella Swan, huh?"
I straighten. I've never heard him say my full name before.
"I'm taking an advanced bio class; I sometimes use lunch to catch up on the stuff I miss out on in my other classes."
"Mitosis of an onion. Can't get any more interesting than that."
"Really." He doesn't sound convinced.
"Yep, maybe you'd know if you did your homework."
His mouth quirks in to an easy smile. "Oh yes about that…"
I raise an eyebrow.
"It really did fall out my window."
"And in to a puddle..."
"Yup, it was pretty ruined when I found it."
"Maybe you could close your window from now on."
"It gets hot back there."
What is he doing here?
Edward is smart, but he barely turns up to class. It's quite obvious what his passion is and it sure as hell isn't science.
"I don't buy it."
"My excuse or that it gets hot?"
"You're right. I guess I should apologise." He says a cockily.
"I guess you could."
"I'm sorry, I should have done my science homework for our assignment Bella, I just had this huge audition the next day and…I'm a jerk."
I shrug, glancing through the microscope one last time and then pulling the slide out.
"I got an A."
"I know. It means I no longer have to avoid you."
I'm not sure if he's serious or not.
The Bunsen burner between makes the colours of his eyes dance between hazel and light green.
Our eyes connect and hold.
I consciously touch my face. "Did you want something?"
"Huh? What?" He blinks.
I suppress a smile and look at my fingers.
"Not sure if you know, but I'm playing the lead in Julius Ceaser." He says not answering my question. "As in Julius Ceaser."
Who else would be?
"You should come watch it if you can."
I bite my lip.
"We read it in English." I say not responding to his invite. Was it even an invite?
"It's a fun play. I gotta admit, I've come to admire Ceasers ambition and power."
"Really? I kind of see him as a jerk whose pride killed him."
"Are you always this generous with your compliments?"
"Only if it's earned."
Edward laughs and tilts his head so the Bunsen burner isn't obscuring me. "Is that the way it is?" he says teasingly.
I shrug, a blush running up my neck.
Is he flirting with me?
Alice calls Edward a dumb ass, scruffy haired doofus who loves attention and dimple flaunting. I don't think that about him though.
He's damn lazy, but there's this innate intelligence that sparkles in his eyes. And despite his popularity I've never really, ever heard him speak much about his 'starring roles' or his pending contracts, it's only stuff that we see in passing.
In fact, the only thing I've ever really heard him speak up about this special needs charity he supports because his brother was autistic and severely disabled and passed away a couple of years ago from an epileptic fit. He's pretty vocal about that – which is kind of sweet and actually quite sad at the same time.
When he speaks next he's looking at his fingers. "Um, so, there'es this new place called Snack Shack in town and apparently they do these really great milk shakes and I was just thinking we should… you and I should go together?"
I know my face has gone crimson and I can't stop the next words from my mouth.
"Um, I mean, I'm not allowed to date or even really go out with boys… until I turn sixteen." Charlie is pretty strict about that.
"Oh…" he looks disappointed.
"Yeah, I'm sorry." I stare at the flame of the Bunsen burner.
I can't believe Edward Cullen just asked me out.
Definitely not what I was expecting.
But I can't say yes. Charlie gets weird at me even talking to guys on the phone, and he's given me straight out rules about dating.
My whole body is burning.
And I don't get it.
Out of everyone he could get. He asked me.
I suddenly feel a little triumphant even though if just turned him down.
The expression on his face changes and he sits up straighter.
"But would you want to hang out at some point… when you turn sixteen?"
I bite my lip and don't look at him. "Yes."
"So that's soon, right?"
"Cool. I'll wait."
A small surge of electric goes through my stomach.
I look at him from beneath my eyelashes and smile. More because I don't really know what else to do.
"So I take it you didn't light the Bunsen burner to heat up the lab?"
I roll my eyes and tell him about my next experiment. He listens patiently or at least pretends to, and teases me and laughs at my silly jokes and put downs.
I do end up going to his play.
I have to admit, it's true what they say, when I actually pay attention, he's pretty good. There's passion and versatility in his acting. And most of all, he's real to whoever he plays.
And I didn't expect Edward to wait. He was the kind of boy that crowds followed down the school corridor. People said his name in passing and the eyes of pretty girls lit up when he was mentioned.
But he did.
Edward waited for me.
He waited until I was ready to date, and then until I was emotionally ready to commit.
Until I was ready to kiss him (that one took some testing of patience).
Until I lost my virginity to him (strangely it didn't take too long at all) and then waited until I introduced him to Charlie (that was probably too soon).
He was my first boyfriend and my only.
And despite all the changes, and our differences, we were sure of one thing. That we would last forever.
But it's strange how circumstances can change things. How one thing that seems so good can be ruined by another good thing.
It's strange that one moment you can be so sure and the next minute, so wrong about everything that you expected to be true.