AN: Holy crap it's been awhile since I last updated! The reason, you ask, because my stupid laptop broke -_- …. and! My girlfriend! UGH, she's amazing … I could talk about her all day! Well... main update about me and my gal, we're awesome and she's planning on maybe spending the summer with me! (because she lives kinda far away) so fingers crossed for that... and … I hate long distance relationships... ONWARD WITH THE STORY!
"I'm confused about …" How in the world am I going to tell her that I'm confused about her? The way I feel about her is something I shouldn't be feeling. "I'm confused about how you always look so awesome with whatever you wear." Nice going, Bella. "Like, I'm sure you could wear a freakin' plastic bag and you'd still look stunning!" That is not at all what I'm confused about. And by the way that Rosalie is looking at me, she doesn't believe that's what I'm confused about. Maybe she could just give me some slack on this one.
"Oh, really? You're confused on how 'awesome' I look with whatever I wear?" Yeah, she totally didn't buy it. "Well, Bella, the secret to that is not letting anyone see you in the morning. I'm pretty sure I look like shit in the morning, until I put some makeup on, then boom! I look like the stunning person I am." I think she's giving me the slack that I need. Damn isn't that great. "Now, on to the real reason about what you're confused about. Tell me the truth." Nope, she is so not giving me any slack.
I look away from her blue ocean like eyes. "It's nothing. Don't worry about it."
"Bella." Wow, she sounds like a parent scolding their child. "It matters to me. Come on, it can't be that bad."
But it is that bad. My feelings are a bad thing for both of us. I don't want to let you into all of this. I don't want to tell you how much I like you. I don't want you to see that I actually might be falling for you. "It is that bad though." I didn't notice that I actually did mumble that to her.
By her silence I can tell that she didn't hear me. Either that or she just ignored what I said. Hopefully it's the first one because I really don't want to explain what is so bad about what I'm confused about.
I can feel her move against my body. I can feel her move her arm so it's leveled with my chin. I can feel when she's moving my chin in order for me to face her. I can feel her blue eyes look at me, memorizing my face as I try not to look at her beauty. "Tell me." Is what she says to me. "Tell me what's so bad. Tell me all about what you're confused about." Oh fuck, she's stroking my head again! That's like my kryptonite! Seriously, if I was a cat I would be fucking purring right now!
"Um … you." That's like seriously what I said to her.
"Me? I confuse you?" Ugh, she sounds so confused. "Tell me more, Bells." Great, now she's calling me 'Bells.' Now we're on pet names.
"Just … like …. the way you make me feel." There! It's out! And there's no fucking way I'm going back, but, damn, I wish I could go back. Never do I ever want to confess my feelings to someone, especially when that someone is the Rosalie Hale. Right, right, she's my girlfriend!
"Oh, now that makes more sense." Like any of this makes sense? I'm surprised she made sense of anything right now. I honestly don't know why I'm so confused about my feelings. With other people I'm not confused about anything about them. I either hate them or I just don't care about them enough to hate them. What is it that I feel for Rosalie Hale? What's so special about her? "So, what exactly are you feeling for me?"
Really? Did you really have to ask that question? "I'm not quite sure."
"Well … just as long as you don't hate me, then it's fine with me."
Throughout all of this, she hasn't stopped petting my head. Like, seriously? Why hasn't she stopped with the contact? Usually I would do something rash if someone started petting my head, but she's my girlfriend, and this is what girlfriends do, right? People who date are, like, super mushy and stuff right? So, this is totally normal, right? This is nothing there's nothing to worry about, she's probably just used to petting her other boyfriends, or maybe her boyfriends pet her and … no, I don't want to think about her getting petted by other strange men. I'm just going to go with the thought that I'm the only person she's ever petted, for some reason, that keeps my head from going out in jealousy.
Maybe I should confront her about this. I mean, it is pretty strange to just start petting your not too long girlfriend. I think it's strange anyway. Yeah, okay, I'll just ask her why the hell she does what she's doing.
"Why are you petting me?" Okay, so, it came out kinda harsher than I expected. Oh, fuck, she stopped! Nooooo, don't stop, don't put me through this misery of not getting petted! What the heck … why am I going crazy about someone petting my head? I mean, yeah it does feel good … oh what am I kidding? I love her petting my head. "No, wait, you don't have to stop." Oh, christ, I sound like I'm begging. That is not something I want to do, but … petting my head is so much more important than my reputation right?
I can feel her chest rumbling as she chuckles softly to herself. "I honestly don't know. I don't pet everyone I date, if that's what you're thinking." Oh thank god! "I just thought that maybe me petting you would help calm your nerves, and I think I'm right. I always liked it when my mom combed through my hair, so I thought 'why not just pet her?' You are my girlfriend." Everything she just said is true. It did calm me and I am her girlfriend.
After a few minutes (or hours) of just sitting on the couch, my eyes start to get really heavy. Like, I can't even hold them up, heavy. I honestly just want to fall asleep right now. All this calm stuff is really getting to me.
I'm pretty sure Rosalie can feel me getting tired as my body starts to get out of its tenseness and starts turning into just dead weight. "Bella." I feel her nudge me. "Hey, why don't we go up to your room? It's almost eleven." It's almost eleven? Where's Charlie? I must've actually said that because not too long after Rosalie tells me, "Oh, he called not too long ago, he said that there's an emergency or something up in Seattle and that he won't be back until next week." Wow … what a coincidence … the one time I bring Rosalie (or anyone really) home he just has to be gone for a while. You know what that means? Rosalie is probably going to stay a while.
"What's the emergency?" I really don't care, really, I'm just too tired to show my shock and say something else.
"No idea, he didn't tell me."
"What did you say?" Yeah, what did Rosalie say to Charlie? I hope it's not something like 'Hi, I'm Bella's girlfriend!' That would be hard to explain to him.
"Oh, you know, the usual, 'hi I'm Rosalie Hale, Bella's friend blah blah blah I'll be staying with Bella.' stuff like that." She'll be staying with me?
"What do you mean you're staying with me?" I can't see her face (my eyes are closed) but I can so tell that she's smiling down at me. Just the way that she's shifted to hold me tels me that she moved her head down to look down at me.
"I mean, I'm staying with you for a while, there's school of course (where, I might add, we have no classes together) but other than that I'll mostly be at your house." Why? Why is she going to mostly be at my house? That doesn't make sense. "Oh, it's only because your father doesn't want you to throw a wild house party or to get in trouble with the cops. It kinda sounds like you've been in trouble with the cops." I don't answer her or open my eyes. I'm pretty sure she knows what the answer for that is. I mean, I'm me, of course I've ran into the cops once in awhile, it's totally normal.
"Yeah, well, you don't have to stay and babysit me. I can totally handle myself, you know?" It's true, I don't need someone to keep me safe in my own house, even though being in Rosalie's arms really does make me feel safe.
"Yeah, I know, but that just makes a good excuse for me to stay with you. We could really get to know each other, especially right now, since it's friday and now we have the whole weekend." Of course I would be stuck with Rosalie for the whole weekend, what a coincidence. If this happened any other time, I wouldn't have to get to know anyone.
"So," She continues, "Let's get you to bed, it seems like someone can't stay up past twelve." Someone, please kill me now.
With all that said and done, Rosalie practically carries me up the stairs and to my room. I'm not even sure how she knew which one was my room, but I don't have enough energy to actually be creeped out.
Then the next thing I know I'm being stripped out of my pants and set into my bed. After being tucked into the covers I make note that someone else is getting into bed with me. Rosalie is wrapping me into her arms. I feel myself relax into her embrace as I fall into a deep sleep. This week is going to interesting.
AN: TADA! Hopefully you guys like it. I worked kinda hard on this... This was alllll done in ONE day, so hopefully I'll make longer chapters! REVIEW! That's what motivates me! LOVE THIS CHAPTER EVEN IF ITS NOT VERY GOOD! DOOOO ITTTT! Okay, I'm going to go talk to my girlfriend now! byezzzz.