I wake up every morning feeling like P-Diddy. Wait, I'm not Ke$ha! I'm Voldemort! So actually when I woke up I put on my black corset and a matching black mini skirt, fishnets, and black combat boots. And if you don't believe me go ask Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Ravenway who stole all of her clothes because she will probably say Voldemort. If she dosen't she is da lyin ho. I am totally goff in case you couldn't tell. I am contemplating making all of my death eaters dress this way. So I pretty much just wanted to tell all of my peeps out there (Hey Bella!) about my life. So it is pretty much the same as any other dark lords (Shout out to my brotha from anotha motha, Sauron)
I wake up and eat a head sized bowl of pork rinds which is pretty much the only thing I ever eat, unless I go to my bfff's house then we eat count chocula. (Best cereal eva bitches!) I then realize I forgot to put in my belly button ring so I do. It is black with a dolphin on it. That is my patronus which is pretty usless becuz dolphins can't swim in air. DUH. I make sure my entire appartment smells like death and then I turn on my gramaphone which I have my favorite Marilyn Manson record on it. And then I call Lu and Bella to come over for a dance partay! Lu says he is busy as shit cuz he's got a son and stuff but I said if he didn't get his arse over at my place pronto I would Avada Kadavra the shit out of his wife.
So Lu and Bella show up and we dance, which is pretty much bangin our fists, until effin tea time when we have to stop. I eat more pork rinds and send home my bfffs. I have a big day coming up tomorrowz. I have to blow Harry Potter'z brains out. I am all like, Harry Potter's gotta die. So I get all nervous and I eat more pork rinds. I actually am so nervous. I'll have to get out my smoking stuff. Yeah, I smoke unicorn blood. Got a problem wif dat? I think it lasts longer than drinking it. I make sure my house retains it's dead smell and then I go out. I have a collection of pollyjuice potions so I can like leave my house wifout people bein like "ahhh that's voldemort." so thats pretty much my day so I will see you tomorrowz.