"It's hard to wait around for something you know might never happen, but it's even harder to give up when it's everything you want."
Their Fate was Lost in the Stars
"Do you love me?" Her big brown doe eyes stare into his and he tightens his hold on her hand before looking up at the night sky. "Of course I do."
A hint of a smile appears on her face, but then it disappears and she asks, "Do you love her too?"
His eyes return to her and he just looks at her. "Yes." It comes out in a whisper, but she hears it loud and clear.
"But you love me more, right?" He sighs and then his lips are pressed against hers and the question is forgotten.
It's a Wednesday and they're in class. She's sitting beside him and she can't help but smile at the fact that his arm is pressed against hers and she can feel all his body heat. Then she notices his eyes are on her, and the warmth is gone.
Her back collides with the wall and his hands are all over her as he kisses her roughly. It's the second time this week that it has happened, and as much as she tries to prevent it she can never say no to him. Not when his kisses are so addicting and his touch is so familiar.
As his lips leave hers and find their way to her pulse point all she can think is how she's going to be able to hide the bruises on her neck.
Her head is resting on his shoulder and his arms are around her as he inhales the sweet scent of cotton candy and cherry lip gloss. Her fingers are tracing abstract shapes on his chest and he plants a small kiss on her forehead. "Do you love me now?"
He gives her that same look he always gives her when she asks that question and sighs. "You already know the answer to that."
"I know…" She replies.
"Then why do you keep asking?"
She stares at him. "I'm waiting for the answer to change."
They're both sitting on the hood of his car staring at the stars as they twinkle in the night sky. "She's getting suspicious."
She glances at him before returning her gaze to the sky. "Stars are like little sprinkles in the sky. I just want to reach up and grab one."
"Can we just stay quiet for a bit?"
And he closes his mouth.
"We need to stop." He's standing outside her doorway, his hands in his jean pockets as she stares at him.
"Why? Did I do something wrong?"
He shakes his head and his hair falls in front of his eyes just the way she likes it. "She's going to find out."
"But we'll be careful and we'll stop looking at each other at school and we'll-,"
"Cat, I love her." And she can feel the tears getting ready to fall, but she holds it back long enough to timidly nod and close the door behind him.
When she knows he's gone her back slides down the door and she lets it all go.
A week later she answers her door to find him there. Instead of a formal greeting he crashes his lips against hers and kicks the door close behind him. His hands run along her sides and he rests his forehead against hers allowing her to feel his warm breath on her skin. "I missed this."
Before she can answer he already has her shirt off and is peppering light kisses on her stomach as he travels down.
It's been days since their last meeting and she can't take it anymore. She decides to go to his house and pay him a little visit.
As she knocks on the RV door she wraps her arms around herself to try and get some warmth. The door suddenly opens and there he is with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. "Cat, what are you doing here?"
She closes her eyes for a second and lets the cold air sting her cheeks before letting the sentence she's wanted to say since they first started whatever it was they were doing out. "I need you to choose."
"Cat, come in. It's freezing out there."
"Please just choose me. Please." Her eyes are full of pain because deep down she knows the answer already.
Instead of replying he leans forward and plants a kiss on her lips. She doesn't push him away, but she also doesn't respond. When he pulls away and looks at her she sees the answer in his eyes.
"Do you want to know what my wish is?" He's holding her as they sit together and watch her favorite Disney princess movie.
"If you tell me then it won't come true."
His statement makes her reconsider, but she knows it probably won't come true anyways. "I wished for you."
He raises an eyebrow and says, "You already have me."
"But I don't have your heart."
He just stares at her for a moment before looking at the television. "Let's finish the movie."
She's at home with her brother and a bucket of popcorn as she watches Aladdin for about the fifth time this week. "I'll hurt him."
A smile flickers on her face and she lets out a deep breath. "You can't."
"Why not?" He questions.
She takes a handful of popcorn. "You know why."
"I love you Cat. You have to tell me if he hurts you."
She hears him sigh. "You aren't taking them, are you?"
She glances at him. "Neither are you."
"You're my medicine." She's eating vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles and he brushes a bit of red velvet cupcake hair out of her eyes.
She nods and shovels spoon's full of ice cream into her mouth. "I know you're no good for me, but I keep coming back for more and every time I end up feeling good."
He kisses her neck and then takes the spoon from her hand. "I'll wait forever."
"For you to love me."
"I do love you." She hears his voice crack a bit, but instead of bringing it up she leans closer to him.
"I think it's over."
She tries to contain the happiness that has just erupted in her. "Oh."
"We talked yesterday."
"You still have me." She told him.
"Yeah…" Neither of them made a noise for a moment. "Cat, I love you."
For some reason she felt herself giggle. "Did you know that of all the lies I've heard 'I love you' is my favorite?"
He can see the sadness in her eyes and decides not to say anything. Instead he loosens the grip he has on her hand and inches away.
"We should get a dog." She smiles up at him.
"What kind of dog?" He asks.
She shrugs. "Any dog…"
"Why do you want one all of a sudden?"
"I hear they make people live longer." She informs him.
He chuckles and pulls her closer to him. "Do you want to live longer?"
She shakes her head and stares into his captivating eyes. "I want you to be with me for as long as possible."
He remains quiet and kisses her forehead.
"Do you want to be with me?"
She can feel her heart crack a bit, but ignores the feeling and snuggles up closer to him.
"We're back together." And this time her whole heart breaks in two.
He nods. "Cat, we have to stop what we're doing."
"I love her." He states.
"I thought you loved me too."
He hesitates before saying, "I love her more."
She closes her eyes as a single tear runs down her cheek. When she opens them he's still in front of her with the same bad news. It's not a dream…
Her hand wipes away the tear before he can and she gets up and runs out the RV. "Cat!" His voice echoes through her mind and she stops at the corner to wipe the rest of her tears away.
"Don't cry… don't cry… don't cry…" The more she repeats it, the harder she cries.
She sits on a park bench, her hair blowing in the wind as she stares ahead. Someone takes a seat beside her. "Hey Cat."
Her head whips around so quickly she's sure she got whiplash. She remembers that voice. That voice used to be the highlight of her day. "Beck?"
He leans back and his eyes stare into hers. "You were right."
"I should've loved you more." And she turns away to stare at the kids that are feeding the ducks in the pond. She can hear him get up and slowly walk away. Her mind tells her to run after him, and she hesitates before turning her head towards the direction he went. "Beck?"
He looks at her, hope twinkling in his eyes and she can't help but compare them to stars in the night sky. "Give me a call, maybe we can catch up."
He grins and she can feel all those feelings she thought went away resurface. "Sure Cat."
When she gets home she sits by the phone and waits. Her eyes are glued to the device as she prays that the next call she receives will be from him. After hours of waiting she shakes her head and looks away.
What was I thinking? That he'd call and we'd fix all our problems. I've grown up and I know better. I can't suffer another heartbreak. But he makes me feel special. He makes me feel wanted… I have grown up… Maybe it'll be different this time.
Why am I even worrying about that? It's just a phone call and it doesn't even look like he's going to call. I should just go to my room and stay away from the-.
Suddenly her heart jumps and she looks back. The phone's ringing. Her hands shake as she picks it up and answers. "Hello?"
"I missed your voice." And the line goes dead.
AN: I hope you liked the fanfic. I wrote this a while back and decided to finally post it. Please review and favorite!