Story from 2005, this seemed to be my year. I wrote a lot around this time…again I'll be keeping most original notes that went with the chapter when it was first posted.
Please remember I'll be keeping most of my original notes in it as well.
If you feel this is inappropriate for ff dot net let me know and it will be removed.
Summary: After an accidental yet passionate run in with Hermione, Harry wants to go further, but fear is holding Hermione back.
Note: The title is part of a song by Trace Adkins 'This Ain't No Thinking Thing'—it's also where I got the idea for the story.
Chapter One of Three:
"Love? Who said anything about love?" Hermione laughed, haughtily tossing her hair over her shoulders, her hands resting on her hips.
Harry's eyes widened with fury. "I did! I love you Hermione, and the one good thing about love is that it doesn't have to make sense. For once Hermione Granger will not be able to analyze a situation!"
Hermione swallowed a lump of anger and took a deep breath, trying to cling the tiny bit of calmness she had left. "Don't do that to me. I will not tolerate being patronized by you."
Harry growled, his eyes flashing with confused irritation as he ran his fingers roughly through his hair. "Sorry-I just—"
"Harry, stop. It isn't love. It was just a very small, meaningless, accidental kiss."
Harry snorted, his eyes showing his surprise. "What? You can't accidentally kiss someone like that! I know you felt it. It was scorching, how could you not?"
Hermione blinked, once, twice, and then rubbed her cold, suddenly clammy hands over her chapped cheeks. "I need to think."
Harry shook his head. "No, no, you've had a month to think about it."
Hermione gave him an irritated smile. "Can we at least take this inside? It's freezing, oh, and look it's snowing!"
"No-don't do that!" Harry snapped sharply, raising his eyebrow with anger.
"Change the subject! It was not just a kiss."
"It was just an accidental kiss!"
"Hermione!" Harry cried out with frustration, pulling at his hair. "It happened and it was the best French kiss of my life. You and I both know I've kissed a lot of girls."
Hermione nodded. "Oh, you have and I haven't?
The corner of Harry's mouth lifted slightly. "Well—" he quickly shook his head. "That's not what I meant."
"Sure," Hermione said sarcastically. "Harry, why did we kiss? It doesn't add up. Neither one of us has shown interest in the other one."
"Hermione, you tripped and fell on top of me."
Hermione rolled her eyes and spoke with sarcasm. "Like we haven't done that before?"
"The age difference is a remarkable factor. We're seventeen now, thirteen then."
Hermione snorted. "Oh, so the fact that you can get an erection faster now then when you were thirteen—," she shrugged in acceptance of her conclusion. "Okay."
Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Don't think I didn't feel it!"
"It's not like I could really hide it," Harry spoke softly, taking a step towards her.
"Harry, why did it happen? It really doesn't make any sense."
Harry rolled his eyes and roughly rested his hands on his hipbones. "Sometimes it happens that way!"
Hermione glared at him, smacking her hands against her thighs in defeat. "Why are we even talking about this?"
"We're talking about it because I want you to be with me."
"I am with you."
Harry calmly licked his bottom lip. "Not like friends. I want you," he stated softly reaching his hand out to trace the curve of her cheekbone. "As in a man wanting a woman more than the air he breathes," his voice softening with each word.
Hermione backed away, her eyes widening with panic. "Whoa, yesterday we were friends and now you want to what, date me? Have sex with me?"
"Yes-no-I mean. I want to be a couple, that would involve dating, and if we happened to have sex after one of those dates—" Harry shrugged nonchalantly, "then so be it. I'm not going to be against a pleasurable activity with a beautiful woman."
Hermione stared at him straight faced and then snorted with laughter. "When did you become such a- such a guy?"
Harry sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "Probably around the time I was—"
"Okay, just stop."
"Fine! You know what, just forget I even said anything, " Harry spoke, anger evident in his voice as he turned towards the Hogwarts fountain and started to walk in.
"Oh, Harry, come on!" Hermione cried out in exasperation.
Harry turned around quickly. "No! You know what? You can't tell me that you didn't feel anything."
"Harry, that kiss changed nothing between us. Just because it was extremely—arousing?" She paused, her eyes blinking with surprise.
Harry stood there and blinked, shivering slightly. "Arousing? So you felt something?"
Hermione nodded, an irritated expression on her face. "A-a little?"
Harry raised an eyebrow. "A little?"
"Okay, a lot. Scorching was a very good description on your part."
"Why can't we be together?"
Hermione clicked her jaw and folded her arms across her chest. "Because," her voice cracking slightly.
Harry held in a growl and gritted his teeth. "'Because' isn't an answer. You're smart enough to make that assumption, though how much smarter you are than that I don't know. It's obvious you lack good decision making."
"That's not fair."
"Damned right it isn't!"
Hermione pinched her bottom lip with her index finger and thumb before dropping her hand to her thighs, smacking them in a motion of defeat once again. "We're friends Harry. It might not work out and we'll be ruined. We're too good to go through that."
"That is bullshit Hermione and you know it!" Harry's voice rose with anger.
"Tell me—be serious!"
Harry jerked his head back and shook it, his posture showing how hurt he was by her words. "You're afraid of me?" He asked, his voice cracking with emotion.
Tears started falling down her cheeks. "No, God, I'm not afraid of you."
Harry walked forward and pulled her into a hug, shivering slightly as he allowed his hands to run along her spine. "Then what?"
Hermione dropped her face into the curve of Harry's shoulder and held him tightly. "I'm afraid that you'll die."
Harry wrapped his arms tightly around her back, showing protection, letting her know he'd never let anything happen to her with just a small gesture. "You're talking about Voldemort aren't you?"
She nodded. "You're so lucky all the time," Hermione pulled away and caressed his face. "And one of these days, I'm so scared that you're lucks going to run out. I love you like a friend and if I let myself love you like a-like a lover-I worry myself to sickness by just being an extremely good friend."
"Nothing is going to happen to me!"
"You don't know that! You couldn't possibly!"
Harry stopped her as she turned away. "Haven't you ever heard that the things you're afraid of are usually the things that are most worth while?"
Hermione gave him a soft smile. "Harry-no."
Harry grinned and cupped both sides of her face. "Hermione, I'm going to kiss you."
"Harry wait," she whispered, grabbing his wrists.
"Just kiss me. If we don't feel anything like last time you can just pull away okay. No hard feelings."
"Okay," she said taking a deep shaky breath.
She was tired of fighting, tired of telling him no. For past month she's managed to avoid this very confrontation, but now that it was here, now that it was happening, the one thing she wanted to do more than anything was to be in his arms, kissing him.
Harry dropped his lips down on hers, his hands slipping down her face and resting on the curve of her neck. Hermione wrapped her arms around his back, moaning softly. Harry slid his thumbs up and down her neck before he pulled away to see her reaction.
Her eyes were closed, her cheeks pink, her nose red from the cold, and her lips glistening. "Harry," she sighed and gripped his shirt pulling him back into the kiss.
To Be Continued…
I got the 'fear' quote from Chasing Liberty.