Since the way I wrote the last chapter was a hit I've decided to continue in that way, for this fic at least.
I'm interested in what you guys think, so should I continue in just Catherine's point of view or would you guys be interested in some chapters from Lou's?
The following morning I wake up to the feeling of Lou's hands on my breasts, massaging them softly.
Someone is enjoying himself.
Keeping my eyes closed I enjoy his touch for a short while; it's been a while since we have been together like this, intimately. I don't want to stop but I know that we have to, his injury is too close to his manhood for us to be able to have sex and even though he started this little game I don't want him to be disappointed when the pain becomes too much and he can't continue, can't complete.
I know Lou, he's the type of man that wants to satisfy a woman completely and if he can't do that because of his injury he'll blame himself and probably go in a sulk. For all of his amazing qualities that is his worst, the man knows how to sulk better than a toddler. I remember when we had a disagreement and I told him to call me when he'd decided what it was he wanted he'd sulked for two whole weeks before he had stopped acting like a child and called.
I don't want that to happen today. Today I want to talk to him, really talk; about all the things we keep brushing under the carpet. I don't want to keep any secrets from him, I'm finally ready to let him inside and know the real me.
But first I need to get him to stop fondling my breasts.
Shifting my body into a more comfortable position I feel the hardness of his chest press against my back, it feels so unbelievingly good. I want to wake up like this every day.
Wait, what? Did I really just think that? Okay, wow.
Never in my life have I wanted to be this close, emotionally, to a man. Eddie has shattered all my illusions of a nice, loving relationship. Is Lou picking up the pieces and piecing them back together?
I'm trying to gather together and organise my jumbled thoughts when Lou's husky voice whispers against my neck, which with a sudden wave of arousal, I realise he is kissing, something he knows I love.
I know he knows I'm awake; I can feel him smirking against my neck and begin to move one of his hands down my body and over my stomach. I know exactly where that hand is going.
Not wanting to get carried away I cover his wandering hand with both of mine and hold them against my stomach and turn my head to face him. He smiles that cheeky smile that makes him look years younger, the smile that makes my stomach flip and my heart flutter.
He moves in to kiss me but I stop him, he doesn't know that I don't like to kiss before I've brushed my teeth. It's the first time we've slept together, actually slept, not had sex.
Confusion washes over his handsome features, the poor guy, twice he has tried to show affection towards the woman in his bed and twice he has been stopped. His mind must be conjuring all sorts right now.
Easing onto my back, letting his hand rest on my stomach without the aid of mine I offer him a small smile and softly rub the arm resting on me.
"Good morning," my voice is cheerful, something that I genuinely feel for the first time in a long time.
His confusion disappears and I'm rewarded with another of his wonderful smiles. "Good morning to you."
He tries to kiss me again. Oh god, I need to stop him. Before his lips can connect with mine I place my finger to them. "Can we not? I have morning breath and I'm pretty sure you don't want to kiss that. It's not very attractive."
His hand wraps around my wrist and pulls my finger from his lips. I'm suddenly nervous, my palms feel clammy and my heart is pounding, he's going to kiss me.
Smiling brilliantly he moves his face ever closer to mine until there's a slight sliver of space remaining between our lips, ours noses brushing together softly.
"We'll cancel each other out. Just one little kiss?" His voice is low and oh so sexy and his eyes, god his eyes are so expressive and right now I could just lose myself in them. So close and see smoky gray that it makes it impossible to look away.
I nod subtly and that's all he needs before he brushes his lips against mine, like a gentle breeze caressing them. Then he's gone again.
Slowly I open my eyes and look up at him, he's smiling. I run my fingertip over my lips. That was amazing, so soft and gentle, and dare I say loving.
"That wasn't so bad was it?" His voice is happy, matching the smile on his face and I know it's genuine. Nobody can fake this kind of happiness.
I nod again, words escaping me, and smile lazily. I look down at her fingers laced together on top of the covers. Why is he so happy today? It's such a drastic change from his snappy mood yesterday. Not that I'm complaining, I don't want it to stop. I like this happy, smiley Lou.
I snuggle closer and tuck my head under his chin to get a few more blissful moments with him before we begin our day then the smell hits me. I need to get him into the shower, all the stress of yesterday and the struggles getting him upstairs and into bed still linger on his body. B.O is not an attractive quality.
It took a lot of coaxing to get him out of bed; he kept pulling me back down and teasing me with his ever so talented hands. Eventually, though, I managed to wriggle out of his grasp and hop out of bed. Even then it took me yanking the covers off his body before he agreed to get up and let me help him shower. That was a challenge in itself with him constantly trying to coax me into the shower with him, his wandering hands at play again.
Now he's in the living room with the nurse doing his exercises, I can hear her encouraging him to do as she's telling him. I hope he's listening; he'll never get better if he's being stubborn.
I load the drinks I've made onto a tray and carry them into the room, when I arrive I find Lou lay on the floor on his back with the nurse on her knees between his legs slowly elevating them in turn, holding them in place for a few seconds then lowering them to the floor again. I place the tray on the dark wooden coffee table I cleared of magazines yesterday, mainly car magazines with a couple of soft porn thrown into the mix.
When I turn I catch Lou's eyes, he's smirking. What's going through that head of his?
Raising a questioning eyebrow I move closer, feeling like I did in the hospital when that nurse was flirting with him. He's my man and this new nurse needs to know that. Okay, so technically he never asked me to be his girlfriend and we've never discussed if we're exclusive but I want to be. And I'm ready to let him know that I do.
Crouching down next to him I run my hand over his chest, an affectionate gesture that I've never used before.
"How are you doing baby?"
Baby? Where the hell did that come from?
It's clear Lou is wondering the same as his confused eyes move from my hand on his chest to my eyes, smiling warmly I lean in and give him a soft peck on the cheek.
"I'm so proud of you." He smiles brightly at my words and my heart soars.
"Sandy here is doing a great job." He gestures to the nurse between his legs and grins, my smile drops and my heart returns to its normal place.
Why is he grinning at her? Does he like her?
Jealousy hits me like a truck. If he likes her then I've missed my chance to get serious with him. She laughs at one of his lame jokes and I glare at her. I know it's not her fault that she's attractive and Lou's noticed, she probably doesn't even know that we're...whatever the hell we are. Fuck buddies? Friends with benefits?
That annoyingly girlish giggle rings out again. I can't breathe; I need to get out of here before I suffocate!
I stand quickly to leave the room, a sharp playful slap stings my butt and I turn to scowl down at Lou, my arms folded over my chest. I'm not amused.
"How about we get you one of those uniforms?" He winks playfully at me before noticing my scowl. "What's wrong?"
My eyes roll in a 'as if you don't know' gesture and I stamp my way out the back door onto his small yard.
I've been pacing for a few minutes, wishing I still smoked, it always helped calm me down but I gave all that up when I fell pregnant with Lindsey. Now I'd kill for a cigarette.
The clacking of crutches rings in my ears. He's coming over here and he's going to want to talk about my behaviour in there. I don't want to talk; I want to smack that silly bitch's face for making him fall for her.
He's right behind me now softly calling my name but I won't turn, I don't want to see him.
His hand strokes across my shoulder blades, I close my eyes. "What's wrong?" He asks again.
I don't want to talk about this; I don't want to say it out loud. It's silly really but if I say it, it'll make it real.
So I remain silent.
He steps around to stand in front of me, I know this must be killing his leg but it's his choice. I didn't ask him to follow me.
"Come on, talk to me." His eyes are pleading but I can't stop the insane jealousy I feel.
I'm ready to be in a committed relationship with him, ready to admit that I want to share my life with him but it's too late. He's changed his mind about it and found his next conquest. All because of my damn insecurities. If I hadn't taken so long to realise what a wonderful man he is I would be with him. Maybe even living together.
But none of that will happen now.
I need to get these fantasies out of my head and accept what we are. Friends with benefits and nothing more.
He touches my shoulder but I shrug him off and look to the left at the bushes lining the perimeter of his yard, providing some privacy from the surrounding houses.
"Go back inside. I'm sure she's eagerly awaiting your return." I know I'm being harsh and unnecessarily blunt but I don't care. I'm hurting and trying to come to terms with the fact that I'm going to be alone forever.
Lou barks out a laugh. How dare he laugh at me? He could try to be a little more considerate of my feelings. So he's moved on because I was too stupid to realise what I could have had with him but that doesn't give him any right to be mean about it!
I spin my head around to face him, fire dancing in my eyes. He has the good sense to back up slightly when he sees the anger on my face. He brings his hands up to stop me from yelling.
"Lets back up a bit. You think I'm trying to get with Sandy?" I scoff and roll my eyes, he shakes his head.
I shrug my shoulders and look away again, I know I'm being childish but I don't care.
"Catherine, why would I go for a rock when I've already got a diamond?"
Before I have time to protest Lou's arms are around my waist holding me close to him as he presses a soft kiss to the tip of my nose.
"Lou, stop." With my hands firmly planted on his chest I push him back slightly to stop him from kissing me. That dopey smile is not helping me clear my head.
"Come on Lou, we both know what this between us is-"
He presses his lips to mine and cuts my sentence off. I have no idea what point he's trying to make but his kisses are soft and sweet. Nothing like the harsh, lusty kisses we share before we have sex.
His lips pull from mine and that dopey smile is back. "Did you know you talk in your sleep?"
Oh god, what have I said?
"I'm aware." I nod, still unsure where he's going with this.
His hands are still on my waist but his thumbs have taken up a stroking motion. "I'm ready too."
Huh? He's ready for what? Why is he being so cryptic? I'm sure he's being annoying on purpose, probably thinks it's funny.
His lips brush my ear and he whispers softly into it. "You're right, I'm your man." He pulls back a little and smiles. "You kept saying it in your sleep. That and asking me to stay with you forever, that you were ready to be a proper couple."
My face flushes and I just know my cheeks are the same colour as the rose bush behind him. I can't believe I said that. Well I can, it was the last thing I'd been thinking about before I'd fallen asleep. But to tell him how I really feel in my sleep?
I suppose it's better than trying to find the right time to do it.
He tips my face upwards and looks in my eyes; I smile shyly and lean into his touch. Returning my smile he leans in for a passionate, loving kiss. I don't refuse his advances this time and we stand there on his yard making out like a couple of teenagers.
When the kiss comes to its inevitable conclusion Lou laughs again, it doesn't bother me this time. I have him and he's happy, he can laugh as much as he wants. So I told him how I truly feel in my sleep, his good mood from this morning all makes perfect sense now.
"I can't believe you thought me and Sandy..."
He laughs again, I'm glad he finds this funny.
I playfully slap his arm. "It's not that difficult to comprehend. You're hot, she's hot. Why wouldn't you want each other?"
He smirks the biggest smirk I've ever seen and his eyes glimmer. "Because she's got the hots for you."
Holy...what? My jaw drops, I try to process this but it's just too...what?
"Wha...what?" I stammer.