Title; The Way I Loved You


Summary; /Songfic/ Edward and Bella have always had a troubled relationship. But now Bella's moved on with a safer, grounded guy who is the perfect person to take home to your parents - the opposite of chain smoker, rough around the edges convict Edward. However, who is Bella's true soulmate? ["The Way I Loved You" by Taylor Swift]

Author's Note; Well, here is my very first songfic, inspired by a Taylor Swift phase and the idea of my favourite couple EVER popped into my head and here's what I got. Thanks a bunch to Crystal for pre-reading this for me! Love you babe! Okay, well; enjoy.

He is sensible and so incredible

And all my single friends are jealous

He says everything I need to hear and it's like

I couldn't ask for anything better

Jasper smiles brightly at me, his hand holding the small of my back securely as we walk up the three flight of stairs it takes to finally reach Alice and Angela's apartment. A Southern gentlemen to his core, he refuses to let me go myself and insists on escorting me up each flight of stairs, stroking my back as we go despite my persistence. What possibly can happen going up the stairs anyway?

"You'll probably fall and break your neck, baby." His Southern drawl interrupts my sour thinking and I giggle lightly and roll my eyes. He's right. Knowing my look, I'd teeter on my Louboutins. "Besides, some poor man may steal my beautiful girl away. Especially in this uh, outfit."

Jasper cocks an eyebrow at my choice of clothing and I snort, very unlady-like. I glance down and shrug minutely. I'll give him that I am in fact wearing only a tank top high waist denim shorts but that's my choice as a woman and American citizen.

"Don't you like it?" I murmur, slightly faulted as we arrive outside the door, knocking lightly as I await his answer, patiently.

My eyes are kept on his and his beauty is silencing. At a height of 5"11, he's tall enough and his striking blue eyes with floppy blonde curls combined is a recipe to set anyone's heart racing. Plus the fact that he's a gentlemen above all things, makes him..perfect. I guess.

Suddenly, the door is flung open by Alice and Angela - yes, they somehow manage to block the whole doorway together despite the small space - who have an ridiculous ear-splitting grin upon their faces. The urge to roll my eyes is great but I suppress the notion. It'd be rude, right?

"Hey, Jasper!" They chime in unison and I giggle-snort at them. "Oh, Bella, you too!" Angela adds in a dramatically less excited tone and I smirk knowingly. Horny, single bitches.

"I love anything you wear. You're perfect." Jasper's murmured statement brings me to my past question that had flitted through my mind without further thought as I was presented with the awkward audacity that was my two best friends. I flush darkly at the compliment and grin up at him.

Time for a show.

I lean up on my tiptoes and kiss him lingeringly, wrapping arms around his neck while his hands rest on my hips in surprise. I smile in the kiss simultaneously with him and after a few moments, he finally pulls away, his eyes dark and full of longing making me giggle with pride.

I did that.

"Aw! He's so cute, Bella!" Alice's chirpy voice makes me turn my head reluctantly and I smile knowingly at her, making Angela snicker from behind her sister.

"I know." I shrug.

Jasper chuckles and kisses my gently on the cheek before walking away, leaving all three of us watching him.

Once he disappears out of sight, I blink rapidly, haunting images flashing behind my eyelids before I'm launched back into the present. Which means I'm facing two gaping twenty-seven year old women stood in the doorway of apartment 3356. Idiots.

"All right, whores, let's get the Ben & Jerry's, Sex and the City boxset and comfy duvets out!" I break the silence and cock an eyebrow at the blushing twins, caught in the act.

"All right fine, but Bella. I actually hate you. Now, are you sure you don't want to share Jasper with us, because, dayum! I'd ride that cowboy!" Alice winked and giggled obnoxiously until she was hit in the head by a pillow thrown by Angela.

I roll my eyes and enter the apartment, heading straight for the fridge.

I need me some Ben & Jerry's before I rip Alice's head off.

He opens up my door and I get into his car

And he says you look beautiful tonight

And I feel perfectly fine

Exhausted, I climb into the car. Tonight was what seemed like an eternity while it was really just three hours of girlie chatting, ice-cream scoffing and dancing to Bon Jovi.

Apparently Angela had scratched the disc with Alice's favorite Sex and the City episode so that idea was shot. Good thing I stopped Alice from committing murder.

The feel of the crisp leather beneath my bare skin is pure bliss and I let out a sheer gasp of ecstasy. My eyelids flutter close momentarily as I savour the moment of silence.

Pure, unadulterated silence. Music to my damaged ears after the shrieks of Alice once she started adding tequila to her ice cream.

I feel rather than hear Jasper's chuckle and his inevitable stare makes me squirm uncomfortably. I hate it when he just watches me. I always get the feeling that there's something on my face or my shirt, that my hair's a mess, that I've suddenly grown an extra head and so forth.

Mom once told me I was stupid and that maybe 'he found me attractive'. Fucking idiot. Dream on, mother.

Slowly, I open my eyes to glance at his amused expression. Yet there's another unidentified emotion hidden in the deep blue irises of his and it makes me smile.


"You're beautiful. Indescribably beautiful, Bella. And I want you. Now." His tone is demanding and sends shivers to down there.


I gulp and bite my lip, eyes widening as his eyes darken before he leans over and grasps my chin in his fingers, coercing my lip away from my torturing front teeth. His mouth attacks mine and I moan lightly, leaning into the kiss as my hands find refuge in his hair.

His lips taste of cinnamon, spice and Jasper. Lovely and inviting.

Jasper's hand lands on my thigh as I part my lips and his tongue slides in effortlessly, claiming my mouth as his. I tug roughly on his golden locks and he gasps with a growl following shortly after.

And in that moment, I am perfectly fine.

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name

You're so in love that you act insane

And that's the way I loved you

The rain is pelting furiously upon my head, drenching me without mercy but the only thing I am focused on is my anger and him. His glorious green eyes are staring right back at me, no emotion available and a small smirk plays on his lips.

It's too bad he looks too good in his favourite pair of ripped jeans and Led Zepplin shirt but I don't care. I'm pissed. Marching with purpose, I keep my eyes on his, unflinching as I make my way to him in the rain.

"What the fuck, Edward? Huh? You can't leave me for six months then just turn up like everything's all well and bullshit! I have fucking feelings, you asshole, so wipe that shitty smirk off your face right now!"

I'm well aware just as well as he is that I'm shouting in his face, within his personal space but right now; who cares?

His nostrils flare, green eyes blazing with his hands curled into fists at his sides and I know he's trying to control his temper around me right now. It's sobering yet doesn't stop me.

"Bella, listen to me-"

My hand strikes his cheek so quick I barely recognise the fact that it was me who made contact with his beautiful face in such a violent manner. I'm breathing heavy, chest heaving as shock registers through me after my spur-of-the-moment action.

"No!" I cry, shaking my head. "Y-you just...left me! Alone! No word, no nothing, asshole!"

My voice shakes as tears join the moisture gathering upon my skin, burning through the nerves until numbness is my only feeling, if that.

"I did that...because I love you, you stupid, beautiful girl." Edward laughs humourlessly and shakes his head incredoulously as if he can't believe I would suggest otherwise.


"Fuck you, don't bullshit me, you stupid prick!" I'm back to screaming now.

"Bella, I swear to God, I'm never leaving again so just be, I dunno, happy?"

I open my mouth to protest further but warm yet freezing cold lips silence me as his warmth envelopes me as I'm being whisked away, far away from all the hurt, from the pain and all negative emotion as our lips move in a frenzied dance together.

My hands grip his bronze tendrils roughly, tugging them painfully as to make his growl in frustration and sexual need. All the while, his hands are gripping my hips with fevor before they slip down to grab my ass and I squeak embarassingly.

Edward lets go off my mouth and rests his forehead on mine as we pant in broken unison, neither of us letting go of each other, neither of us feeling the need or want to leave each other, even by an inch.

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you, Edward. It makes me crazy." I let out a shaky breath and smile wistfully.

He chuckles darkly. "I don't mind crazy."

Breakin' down and coming undone

It's a roller coaster kinda rush

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

He pushes me against the wall, our drenched body rubbing against each other, seeking friction and I gasp, breathing heavy as he trails open mouthed kisses down my neck. One

large hand grips my ass while the other kneads my breast.

I cry out. "Fuck! Edward-ugh!" I close my eyes and succumb to feeling.

His chuckles rings out and vibrates against my skin. "Yes, baby? Do you like this?" His fingers tug at my top and yanks it away before pulling down the bra cup which pushes my breasts into the cold air. I hiss.

Edward takes one stiffened peak into his mouth and I moan lowly, my fingers finding solace in the jungle of hair upon his head, tugging roughly as his tongue swirls rapidly around one nipple while his hands tugs and rolls the other between his finger.

The sensation is indescribable.

"No...no more...teasing, please! Fuck me against the wall, Edward!" I growl and whimper as he bites down on a tender nipple.

"As you wish, Bella." He rips away my panties and bunches up my skirt around my waist before pulling down his own pants and letting his cock spring free from the confines of his underwear.

I barely have time to register what is occuring when he enters me roughly, to the hilt and I cry out again, gripping onto his shoulder for some leverage.

Edward thrusts in and out of me at a steady rhythm; not too fast, not too slow. And it isn't long before I find myself climbing, higher and higher until I reach my release.

"Edward!" I gasp and his lips cover mine, silencing mine as he follows closely behind me.

He respects my space

And never makes me wait

And he calls exactly when he says he will

I shake my head minutely, closing my eyes as immense pain slices through my head for the hundreth time that morning, causing me to wince sharply. Fucking migranes. I step away from my boyfriend and try to smile reassuringly at him.

Guilt cuts my nerves as I open my eyes slowly to see Jasper's face. A cool smile graces his lips with his forehead clear of any frown lines but his eyes are careful, guarded.


"I'm sorry, baby. I just...need some space, okay? My head is a fucking killer right now." I murmur lamely whilst keeping a hand upon his forearm. Contact is vital to make sure I don't make him feel like shit any further.

"Okay. I'll call you at half six tomorrow to see if you're better." He nods and smiles gently before kissing my cheek tenderly then leaving me alone in the too bright light of my bedroom.

With nothing left to do but wallow in self pity, I climb into my bed and close my eyes, succumbing to the exhaustion.


The next day, I find I'm much better. Perhaps sleep is the best medicine despite my father's persistence that "sleep is for the weak".

Half past six on the dot, my phone rings, the notes of Debussy's Clair de Lune ringing out around me. And I know it's Jasper. He always calls when he says he will. Without fail.

"Hey." I croak and clear my throat. "Hey, baby."

Jasper chuckles on the end of the line. "Hey, darling. You okay today? I hope so because in about five minutes I'll be pulling into the driveway to take you for dinner. At the diner, if that's all right."

As if I have a choice. But of course, this is Jasper, not him. I have a choice.

"Sure." I murmur.

"Great! I'll be there in three minutes, sweet cheeks." He ends the call.

With nothing to do with myself but wait for the next three minutes, I sigh and flop down onto the couch with a huff. Closing my eyes momentarily, I relish in the darkness it invites.

But like everything else in life, it doesn't last forever and the silence is then interrupted by the sharp knockings on the front door, alerting me to Jasper's presence. I glance at the clock.


Yep, Jasper never makes me wait.

He's close to my mother

Talks business with my father

He's charming and endearing

And I'm comfortable

The past week had been a whirlwind of double shifts at Newton's, crazy nights at Alice and Angela's, probing questions from my parents and dates with Jasper. Fun times. Note the sarcasm.

I shove on my favourite Jersey and ugg boots with the standard black leggings before making my way down the stairs slowly. After injuring my small toe at Newton's on Friday by knocking it on a corner of a wooden box, I'd become a complete baby.

"Renee, this cooking is divine! If only Bella could follow after you in this way." I hear Jasper's good-heartened chuckle and stop, frozen on the stairs before shuffling backwards a few steps to get out of sight.

"Thank you, Jasper!" I can almost sense my mother's blush and I roll my eyes.

"Jasper," Charlie begins. Oh great, now father is making chit chat with my boyfriend. But, of course, Jasper is charming him.

"Yes, Charlie, you shouldn't fold on that deal. It'd be stupid." Charlie chuckles along with Jasper and they're probably grinning like idiots.

I snort quietly to myself and resort to returning to my room. I can't stand charmers. Which begs the question; why am I with Jasper?

Because of him. My subconcious growls.

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name

You're so in love that you act insane

And that's the way I loved you

"How was she?"

My voice is deathly quiet, bordering on psychotic as the door closes quietly and I hear the loud stumbling throughout the hallway. And then he's standing in the doorway, wet and fresh, hair glistening with a frown upon his face.

"Who?" Edward feigns ignorance and I close my eyes, ignoring him.

"That blonde bimbo who was practically sitting on your fucking lap!" And now I'm screaming. So much for the calm approach.

Edward winces and his eyes darken, anger lacing his beautiful features. He's dressed in a pair of blue jeans, white crisp shirt and blue Vans. He's mouthwatering but I need to concentrate on my anger. Yes, anger is good. Lust, bad.

"Don't fucking start, Bells." He groans, running his hands through his hair as he leans against the doorway.

"Don't start what?" I cock an eyebrow, sitting up in the bed and kneeling on my knees. "Asking my boyfriend if he cheated on me with a much younger, sexier, blonder woman? Hell, why not? Oh yeah, because you're Edward Cullen, Mr. No Background History who refuses to let go of any information!" I spit out, venom dominating my tone.

I can tell that my nostrils are flaring because that's what happens when I get pissed off. Especially when Edward's involved.

He laughs humourlessly and shakes his head, disbelief and mild amusement grafting his expression. Slowly, he walks over to me until his knees hit the edge of the bed and he places his arms either side of me.

I feel trapped. And that's what I am. A small child, trapped in fear.

"Yes, Bella, because I'd have that skank over you. Definitely! After all, what are you to her but another piece of ass waiting for me at home?" He smirks cockily and arches an eyebrow, asking for defiance, a challenge.

Red. I see red. Blood, roses, and poppy coloured red.

"Fuck you! I am not your bitch!" I push both hands against his chest until he is moved a few feet away from me and he seems shocked. Damn right, you better be shocked, asshole.

Minutes stretch for eternities as we stare at each other, neither refusing to back down. Same old, same old.

"But you are mine." He whispers, breaking the silence.

I stop breathing because I know, he knows, we both know that I am his. Inevitably.

"Yes. But you can't just... parade with skanks like her in front of me." I whisper back, pain lacing my tone, entwining with everything I say.

"Bella, you're mine," he pauses and walks cautiously to me then joins me on the bed, copying my stance. "And I'm yours." His green eyes lift to meet mine as he entwines our fingers together.

I gasp. "Edward."

Then I launce myself at him and our lips connect, hands wandering, lips searching, hearts joining.

"I love you."

"I love you."

Breakin' down and coming undone

It's a roller coaster kinda rush

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

"You're mine, Bella, all mine..." Edward's voice is full of wonder, speculation as if I had a choice on whether I was his or not, as if I had a choice to deny this. But, of course I can't. Because what he says is the truth. I am his.

"Yes, Edward, always." I whisper back.

Our naked bodies are tangled, entwined so that we're joined in every way possible. Our chests are pressed together and Edward is running his hands up and down my hips and thighs as he stares at me with...adoration, I suppose, in his eyes.

"Never leave me." He whispers as he hides his face in the crook of my shoulder and it takes everything not to snort or laugh at the absurdity of his plea.

After all, it is him who leaves me and I can never bring myself to leave him, even if temporary.

I bring his head up to align with and I kiss his slowly, sensually while I whisper against his lips.

"Never. I promise. I am yours, only yours."

He growls carnally and throws me onto my back while he attacks my mouth and I respond with just as much passion, want and need. Edward kisses down my body until he reaches my wet core and I whimper when he blows gently on my hot sex.

"Fuck! Edward.."

"I wanna make you feel good, baby."

That is the last thing I hear besides my panting, breathy moans and writhing on the bedsheets as his tongue dives into me, licking my sensitive clit while pushing two long fingers in and out of me.

He curls them inside of me and I cry out, coming fast and hard, leaving me breathless.

Once I've regained composure - slightly - and can breathe normally again, I grin down at him and kiss him forcefully before he can protest any further.

I am his.

He can't see the smile I'm faking

And my heart's not breaking

Cause I'm not feeling anything at all

Jasper's eyes search mine, desperate for some recognition or realization or fucking something. I don't know. But his hands are tracing spiral patterns on my bare back and I force a smile.

But my only downfall is my eyes. I don't know who said it, but apparently "eyes are the window to the soul". And that sucks because I'm pretty sure my soul isn't a very satisfied

being at the moment.

"Bella?" He murmurs as his lips leave a trail of burning kisses down my neck and shoulder.

"Yes?" I whisper.

"I love you." Jasper resurfaces from my skin to look at me with a gentle, loving smile and my heart breaks. I can never return that smile.

"I know." I murmur before pressing my lips to his temple and holding him in more of an caring embrace than a romantic one. As one, we fall asleep together.

Then, at that moment, I realize something; I don't love him.

And you were wild and crazy

Just so frustrating intoxicating

Complicated, got away by some mistake and now

"Oh my God! We can't just steal the car, Edward." I gasp, whisper-yelling at him, my mouth open in shock. Is he fucking crazy?

I shake my head, and root myself to where I'm stood, refusing to move. No, I can't take part in this. We'll get caught and then...then what? Ugh, had to fall in love with a convict, right, Bella?

Shut up, conscience.

"C'mon, Bella!" Edward grins and wraps his arms around my waist, pressing my body to his and I roll my eyes at him, fighting to keep the smile off my face. He does not need encouragement. "We'll take it and then I'll park it somewhere secluded and then I'll take you for a ride."

He chuckles and eyes me slowly, gauging my reaction. I gasp and shake my head, flustered.

"You wanna fuck me in the backseat of a stolen car, Edward Cullen? Tough shit!" I growl, squirming in the arms in an attempt to ignore my arousal.

"No." He pauses, an sneaky smirk on his face as he leans down to whisper in my ear, his hot breath washing over me. I whimper and I feel his smile against my skin. "I wanna fuck you on the hood of a stolen car, Isabella Swan..."

I gasp. Holy crow.

"Edward..." I breath, closing my eyes momentarily.

I move my head so that our lips are inches apart but the moment is stolen when the shrieking of police sirens cut through the air like a knife.

"Shit!" He curses and looks frantically around and lands on the corner of the parking lot. "Fuck, I knew there'd be cameras somewhere. You must've said 'stolen car' too fucking loud. Shit!" He growls and rakes his hands through his hair.

I blanch. Well, shit.

"I'm sorry. Don't go, Edward. Please." I plead, searching his eyes for an indication into how he's feeling. Edward's gaze lands on me and I feel chastised, like a small child. It's unsettling.

"Bella, I-I can't stay. You know that." His tone is careful, guarded and hurt is laced into his words. My heart clenches.


I shake my head and grip his arm. "No, Edward, don't be fucking stupid! You're not leaving me!" I'm not sure who I'm trying to convince, me or him.

"I'm sorry Bella... I'll find you." He mutters apologetically and kisses me chastesly on the lips before running out the back door as he leaves me stranded alone. Again.

"Fucker!" I scream and groan loudly, tugging on my brunette locks. "Fucking bastard!"

He always leaves me.

I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain

It's 2am and I'm cursing your name

I'm so in love that I acted insane And that's the way I loved you

I laugh and roll my eyes, shutting off the call from Jacob and pocket my iPhone in my pocket before entering the apartment I now share with Edward.

"Edward?" I call out as I drop my keys onto the countertop.

Silence. I frown and look around the corner into the living room to see Edward, hunched over in his armchair, heels of his hands pressed into his eyes.

"Edward?" I say his name again but quieter this time with care as I approach him carefully, as if walking towards an injured animal, afraid it would escape.

Slowly, his head lifts and I frown, my heart breaking at the pure angst and hurt vivid in his brilliant green eyes usually filled with confidence and amusement.

"Talking to Jacob again?" His spits out in irritation.

Fuck me.

"Edward, don't. Please." My voice cracks and I sigh, crouching down to reach eye level with him. I reach out to place a hand on his neck in comfort but instead of relaxing, he jerks back, eyes wide.

I gasp.

"No!" Edward shouts, causing me to fall back onto my ass. "Don't! He wants you! He wants what is mine, Bella, don't you see that?" He growls with sorrow in his words as well as anger.

He's never been this mad. Ever. But Jacob is the straw that broke the camel's back and Edward has snapped, like a twig. His fists clench by his sides as he tries in vain to control himself. When he speaks, his voice is much quieter but it sounds much more deadly than any loud insult he could shout at me.

"Do you want him?"

"Don't be fucking stupid!" I blanch and shakily pull myself to my feet, for once towering over him. "I love you, you idiot!"

My hands grasp each side of his face so that I force him to look at me, brown eyes searching green. I find guilt yet disbelief laying in the depth of his emerald irises.

"Bella." He gasps and grabs my hair, eliciting a gasp from me before his lips crash to mine as we mold together as one. "Never leave me. I'm sorry." He whispers in torment and coaxes my lips open with his and I nod in assent.

How can I leave him, ever?

Breaking down and coming undone

It's a roller coaster kinda rush

And I never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you oh, oh

"I promise, Edward. But how about you promise to never leave me this time?" I cock an eyebrow and wink teasingly making him roll his eyes in exsparation at me. I grin and giggle.

He sighs. "I love it when you giggle."

"Do you?" I raise my eyebrows. I hate it when I giggle. It's so...awkward.

"Yes." He grins and claims my mouth with his, our lips molding in one as they participate in a heated, frenzied dance. His tongue is at the parting of my lips and I open them to let him in and moan at the ecstasy of Edward Cullen's mouth against mine.

His hand grabs my thigh and hitches one leg over his waist, grinding mercilessly into my aroused heat.

I moan into his mouth and he growls, the sounds vibrating together as one. It sends waves of arousal straight to my nether regions, the effects he has on me. It's sobering.

"Fuck, Edward... Make love to me." I gasp and hold his gaze as he flashes a crooked smile - my favourite smile and I stop myself from swooning. Just. He's so perfect.

Edward pecks a kiss on the tip of my nose before he discards of his top and we undress each other, slowly, making sure we don't leave any inch body undiscovered and untouched.

After what seems like an age of forever of him teasing me and vice versa, he enters me and I gasp at the pure ecstasy that it brings me. He's perfect, I'm perfect, we're perfect. Continuing with a slow, sweet rhythm he makes love to me and we climb higher with each thrust until we come to our release as one. I grip him tightly as my breathing slows.


And that's the way I loved you oh, oh

Never knew I could feel that much

And that's the way I loved you

I tap my fingertips restlessly against my denim clad thighs as my front two teeth make a meal out of my bottom lip but I can't help it. I'm nervous and why the hell wouldn't I be? It's been two years and I'm finally seeing him again.

I close my eyes and attempt to even out my breathing. Once I'm past the stage where I know for certain that I won't pass out or hyperventilate dangerously. And when I finally open my eyes again, I gasp.

There he is.

Strolling purposefully towards me is Edward Cullen, glorious as always. Time makes no difference to my reactions to him as my mouth dries, my heart speeds up and I stop breathing. Today he's wearing worn out Levi's, classic skater shoes and his favourite You Me At Six tee shirt.

As he grows closer, I take in more prominent features such as his sculpted lips, narrow nose, sharp jaw, emerald twinkling eyes and cocky smirk. Classic Edward.

"Bella." I smile gently and stand up so we're both in reaching distance of each other and he pulls my hand roughly so I collide with his chest, where he proceeds to hold me, with

no evident intention of letting me go.

"My Bella." I can feel his smile on my forehead and I smile back, the first real smile in what seems like forever.

"Edward." I look up and stroke his cheek tenderly before claiming his lips with mine, molding myself to him. I definitely have no intention of letting my Edward go ever again.

My Edward.