Epilogue ~I Can't See Anyone But You
Twenty-three months later…
My eyes popped open, focusing on him. He was home! My heart stopped momentarily as I watched his pale chest rise and fall, his mouth wide open as a light snore escaped his throat. He was flat on his back with his hair in wild disarray, arms dead at his sides, muscle tone sighing in defeat. He was the epitome of calm, giving in to jet lag no doubt. He had been too tired to even wake me.
He'd been out of the country for the last three weeks since taking over his father's company. He'd stopped in no less than ten countries to personally greet the subordinate companies he'd be taking over in the process. I couldn't join him, sadly.
Edward had given me about three months off before saying I had to go back to school. He wouldn't see me waste my education. Therefore we changed our D/s contract to weekends only. We both agreed it was quite enjoyable, and it gave us something to look forward to each week: a time and place to unwind and connect to each other.
Would he ever stop taking my breath away? I would wake him now with kisses, but it would lead to other things, things we don't have time for today. Last year I had the intention of making Thanksgiving dinner. However, with Edward being sick, our getting used to our new lifestyle, the "thing" with James…well, we decided taking it slow and simple made more sense.
This year, however, I decided to try again to make a Thanksgiving party for our families and friends, all the important people who shaped our lives. My dad Charlie was already here in a hotel with his new girlfriend. Her name is Barbie; I still giggle, wondering what she looks like. I'll see tonight.
Deciding I could delay no longer, I leaned forward, feeling his heat the closer I got. Before I could plant a barely-there kiss, his eyes popped open, staring up at the ceiling. I didn't think he knew where he was at this moment, poor guy. I couldn't stifle a small giggle. The temptation was too much, so I planted my lips on his while I stared too closely into his wide green eyes.
He smiled against my lips. "Baby," he said, bringing his tired arms around me. This was it, this was what I loved. He was my everything, and he was home. I was so proud of him!
"Why didn't you wake me?" I asked, pulling back to look at him.
"Tired," he moaned inaudibly. His arms once again fell to his sides, his lips the only thing making an effort against mine. I smiled.
"Well, you continue to rest. I have got to start cooking."
"Mmm, food," he moaned.
"I will have breakfast for you as well," I said, breaking away from the kiss. His eyes closed halfway before finally locking shut.
I took a quick soothing shower, a grin plastered on my face that I couldn't remove. I had missed him so much. The fact that we missed two weekends in our playroom had me on edge. I needed him like air.
I finally walked downstairs in a pair of navy blue shorts, one of Edward's white v-neck t-shirts, and thick grey socks. It was freezing outside, but Edward always kept the house toasty warm. I smiled as I entered the kitchen, my second favorite place in the house in relation to anywhere Edward might physically be. The windows facing the front yard displayed a vast area of white. Snowflakes were falling gracefully from the sky.
I heard a knock on the door, alerting me that mostly likely Esme was here to help me make dinner. She was so excitable, so I braced myself. "Esme, it's so good to see you," I announced as a cool breeze brushed against my bare legs. It felt exhilarating.
"Is he home yet dear?" she asked as I removed her coat. I nodded while hanging her snow covered coat in the hallway closet.
"He's jet-lagged. He may sleep all day," I told her. She smiled sweetly.
"Well, go in there and wake him up. In fact, I am surprised you answered the door, dear. You have a virile man upstairs. Why aren't you going at it?" She looked genuinely concerned. Oh, here it is: my favorite, unedited, totally insane Esme.
"I'm going to make him breakfast, then maybe he'll wake up."
"Oh, good idea," she said. "I'll just start preparing the turkey, if you don't mind?"
"Be my guest," I told her, following her into the kitchen. At first I was fine with the idea of doing this entire dinner myself, but Edward's mother and I had actually become quite close. She was unabashed, but I grew to love that about her.
I scrambled some eggs, broiled bacon in the oven, finished buttering his favorite wheat toast, and put all of it on a tray with orange juice. Esme turned on a radio and was dancing around our kitchen, humming a tune. I smiled before taking Edward his breakfast.
When I saw him barely moved from his earlier position, I really wondered if a party tonight was a good idea. It wouldn't hurt to move it to tomorrow, would it? I knew he wouldn't allow me to change it though. I sat next him, holding his breakfast tray against my lap. I ran my finger lightly over his cheek to wake him.
"Master?" I whispered softly. Once again his eyes popped open, his faced turned to me, his eyes slightly red from exhaustion. "What are you dreaming about?" I asked as he tried to sit up against the pillows behind him.
"You, of course," he whispered back. I positioned the tray over his thighs, and he gave me a sweet kiss in return. "This smells so good. I missed you, Isabella." he spoke softly.
"Eat. Your mother's here already, and she thinks we should be up here getting it on. So, don't be surprised if she asks," I told him, laughing. He rolled his eyes, then took a big bite of eggs.
After a thoughtful second, he added, "She's right, you know."
"Yes, she is, but we have so much work to do. We have my Dad; Barbie; Renee can't make it; we have Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, Audrina, and Cara; your parents. This was a good idea, why?" I asked, suddenly flustered.
He smiled before finishing off his orange juice. "It will be great, and I want us to announce our engagement before my mother knocks us over the head and drives us to Vegas." I smiled wide, remembering the proposal.
It was three months ago. Edward had taken me out to dinner, and then we went back to our house for a scene. We hadn't played in a few weeks at this point, as he prepared for taking the reins of his father's company. Neither of us could wait to be alone inside our private world.
We'd been playing for hours, in between making love in exhaustion. He lit one small candle and put it on the bedside dresser before getting back in with me. He snaked his arms around my middle, staring at me lovingly. "Are you happy?" he asked with a contented grin.
"Of course, I have everything I ever wanted."
"Which would be?" he questioned curiously.
"You, silly, only you!"
"Awww!" He raised his eyebrows as if he were genuinely surprised. Yeah, whatever. He knew he was my world. "I want you again," he said smoothly, running his long fingers through my hair.
"You can't possibly," I looked at him in shock. We'd literally made love all day. I wasn't even sure what time of day it was outside. He motioned toward his middle with his eyes.
"You underestimate me. Look for yourself."
I furrowed my brow, deciding to play his game. I crawled seductively under the covers to find his stiff erection bobbing between his legs. I placed my hands around it in total darkness, feeling his hips move slightly. I felt the covers over my back move away slowly. His eyes connected with mine as light from the candle lit our faces.
"What? What is this?" I asked as he sat up to investigate with me. A black peace of lace was wrapped around his erection lightly, a small silver key hanging from it.
"It's the key to my heart," he announced in a serious tone. I slid it from around his engorged penis, brought it to my mouth, and kissed it.
"Thank you," I whispered, winding the lace around my wrist, the key dangling in the candlelight. I centered myself over him and slid down as his arms wrapped around me. His moan and slight shiver sent me reeling.
This time we were painfully slow, his eyes never leaving mine. He stayed upright, holding me close to him. I kissed him lovingly, trying to push his lips open so I could explore his tongue, but he wouldn't allow it. I bit his lower lips softly, but he still wouldn't budge. Our breathing became strained as I lowered myself onto him over and over.
"Bella, I need you," he told me. I reciprocated with soft whispers of love. "Will you marry me, sweetheart?" His grip tightened on my backside, my exhausted body coming to life. What? I hadn't expected those words so soon, if ever. We both had so much on our plates.
Deciding for once not to over think it, I whispered my yes seductively into his ear, tears rushing to my eyes. He held my face in front of his, coming forward in a happy kiss, his tongue now seeking my approval. I invited him in and pulled back quickly when my tongue came across something rough.
"What?" But before I could speak further, he smiled.
"What's wrong?" he asked while maintaining his smile. Then, so slightly I almost missed it, a large diamond ring poked between his lips. What did I do? I screamed as reality hit me. My heart pounded as Edward pointed a remote towards the far wall and the lights in the room turned on.
"Take it, baby, it's yours." He pointed toward the ring. I came forward, sucking on it and pulling it firmly from his mouth, a lace string rolling off of his tongue with it.
"How, how long was that in your mouth?" I laughed, amazed that he'd somehow done this without my notice.
He laughed. "When I went to the bathroom, duh?" he chided me. Oh.
"You know I try to be, but I am not the most romantic guy in the world. I just know that you, Isabella Swan, are the one! Finally I have found my match, my hope, my dream. With you, I can handle anything in this world. I have been worrying myself too death, trying to do this right. In the end I decided to just make it memorable. Because everything about our history is about amazing memories."
"Oh, Edward, I love you!" We made love three more times that night before falling into a comatose sleep. Suddenly my body relaxed, and I felt safer than I ever had in my life. I was his, forever.
"Well, we shouldn't disappoint my mom," he said, moving the breakfast tray to the side and placing me in his lap.
"Edward Cullen, no, we are not doing it with your mom in the house!" I said, extracting myself from his arms.
"We'll see," he said, folding his arms in front of his chest and pouting his lips.
I smiled, carefully grabbing the tray and walking away quickly before he could capture me in his web.
As our guests started showing up that evening, I had yet to see Edward out of bed. I went up to change into something a little more festive and to check on my love. Once inside our room I was surprised to find him up, the bed made, and him standing in a corner putting on his tie. "Hi, sweetie, feeling rested?" I asked, placing my hands on his shoulders. He nodded, smiling, then kissed me softly.
I slipped out of my shorts into a tan sweater dress, brushed my hair, and added some light make-up before taking his hand. He handed me my ring before whispering for me to put it on. I had yet to wear it in front of everyone. Since we were announcing our engagement tonight, we decided, why not just wear it? It wasn't like our families didn't know we were close to this point.
"I love you," he announced, embracing me tightly.
"I love you, Edward Cullen," I replied, kissing his mouth and sucking his lower lip in between my teeth.
"Oh, you better stop," he warned. "Remember what I said earlier. It could happen sooner than you think." Oh, dear.
Downstairs in the living room, eight voices were excitedly humming in happy voices. As Edward and I entered the room they all clapped, happy to see us. Edward kissed me before sitting down next to Emmett and Rosalie to have a chat. I decided to go into the kitchen to get the turkey out of the oven so it could rest before we sat down and ate. I snickered as I recalled just seeing Barbie for the first time. She actually looked like she could be a Barbie doll, all blonde, blue eyes, big boobs. I thought it was good Renee chose not to come.
I grabbed a potholder, bending down as I opened the oven door. Grabbing a fork I pulled the turkey pan forward a bit and tested its tenderness. It smelled insanely good with its juices bubbling around the outside. I decided five more minutes should do it. When I felt his hands on my hips, I closed the oven door, afraid with my luck I'd fall in.
As I closed the heated door, he pressed his groin into my backside. "Mmmm, let's skip dinner," he said as I stood, heated not only by the oven, but by his touch.
"Oh, Edward, quit. Anyone could walk in here."
"Let them," he whispered in my ear. I leaned back against his chest , laying my head against his shoulder.
"Stop," I whispered. He palmed my breasts through my dress when I heard it.
"Bella, everything coming along?" Esme asked, and surprisingly Edward didn't move. He continued to rub his palms against my nipples.
"Ah, yes," I announced hoarsely, our backs still facing her. "Just a few more minutes, Esme, thanks."
"I'm sorry for interrupting, dear. Continue on." I swore I could see the grin on her face.
"Thank you, mother," he said as an afterthought.
I turned to face him. "Edward!" He cocked his head to the side in firm annoyance. "Master, please, let's get through this."
Smiling lightly, he agreed. "I haven't had you in three weeks. Can you blame me?" I shook my head, knowing that might result in punishment later. Though it isn't yet the weekend, he still expected me to respect him, follow his commands, and call him Master in private during the week. Today I was so nervous.
I had all my friends here, my father, his parents. We were going to allow them in on our engagement, and everything had been going so well. Too well, compared to how bumpy it was at first. I was almost feeling those old feelings of being afraid to get too happy. The main reason for my nerves was that no one here— other than Emmett and Rosalie—knew what Edward and I did. The playroom was upstairs near the bathroom. I wasn't sure how I would feel if they knew. Hopefully the downstairs bathroom doesn't get occupied and someone needed to go upstairs.
Edward didn't exactly want them to know, but felt eventually honesty was better than always hiding. We have nothing to be ashamed of, he has reminded me constantly. And mostly I agreed, but then I tried to imagine my mother or my father's face. Not good.
When we all finally sat around his large dining room table, just the ten of us, I looked over at Edward. He was everything I have ever wanted. Even with all of our family and friends around, all I could see or hear was him.
Rosalie was the first one to mention my ring, which brought all eyes, including Edward's, to my left hand. He explained to them that we were engaged, and everyone toasted us, cheering us on. I smiled in blushed heat. His hand trailed up my thigh under my dress until he reached my bare heat. I smiled shyly at him as he winked. Everyone around us was cheerful, happy, talking animatedly. All I saw and heard was him. I have missed him so much I could cry.
The day he left I was a wreck, worried about all the planes he'd be taking. Three weeks never seemed so long. Now he was here, and we had a future together. He was amazing, just like I always knew he was, even back when I was silly and fifteen.
I looked over at my dad, a shy smile on my lips. He was so happy for me, but I could see that the woman hanging on his arm made him delighted in a way I had never witnessed. I was so happy for him as well.
Rosalie and Emmett had become our closest friends. They were in the lifestyle of course, and they were who we turned to when we needed advice. They got married last Christmas, and she was proudly plump with his child.
Esme and Carlisle were the craziest couple I knew. Edward and I adored them, despite that. Carlisle always looked at Edward like a gift he still couldn't believe was bestowed upon him. He beamed proudly at both of us.
Alice had become a truly great friend; her baby Jasmine was born healthy, and they married three weeks later. Jasper adored her, and Edward was his best man. They didn't stay long because Jasmine was cholicky, and the babysitter was young.
My gaze connected, as ever, with my beautiful Edward, who turned to me with a wide grin. His hand took mine under the table where he placed my hand on the bulge in his lap. He was hard, and his eyes burned with desire.
Cara and Audrina announced some months back that they had quit On The Down-Low. Then two weeks ago the place was closed down after James' trial. James got one year in jail for kidnapping with the intent to harm. Once they questioned where he had met me, it all came out about my being an escort. The judge, however, sealed this part of the records from the public. A trial for the owners of On The Down-Low was pending for prostitution and failing to provide a safe environment where crimes committed weren't swept under the table.
They mostly came here for a free meal, but I invited them because they took me in and showed me the ropes. We weren't close, but they indeed touched my life, and in turn, though obscurely, brought Edward and me together.
My head was foggy from laughter, happiness, and champagne. Everyone was filtering out slowly, saying their congratulations and goodbyes. I didn't think one person was here to actually celebrate Thanksgiving, though I knew we were all thankful.
Esme and Carlisle were the last to leave, promising us the wedding of a century. We smiled, knowing it would be nice to have someone else handle it. We kissed and hugged, closing the door on the stormy, snowy night outside. I leaned back against the door as Edward locked it, bracing himself on either side of me, his eyes bright and intense. His breath was shaky. "I need you!" he announced firmly, and my insides turned to jello.
I stared into her brown eyes, filled to the top with so much desire. I was not even sure anyone was here only moments ago. Only Bella mattered to me. I loved all our friends, our family, our acquaintances, but this woman owned me in every way possible. Our connection was deeply satisfying.
As I carried her to our bed, she looked up at me with eyes of adoration, patience, love, understanding. She has always been the answer to my prayers. I lay her down gently on the bed, as flashes of her from our distant past rushed through my head—every time I had passed her in the hallways, watching her at lunch, the way she used to pop up wherever I was when I least expected it.
At those times she was in my conscience, and yet it just wasn't our time yet, even though it hurt me to think I so easily moved away from her at one time. It wasn't every day you found the one you always had, again. I was so lucky.
I never thought I'd find a woman who understood me, who completely accepted who I was and what I needed. In her I found that and so much more that I was stunned speechless at times. I took Bella to a fertility specialist a few months ago when we talked about getting married. I desperately wanted to find a way for us to have a baby someday. It was better to do what we could while she was young.
They were surprised to actually find an egg in one of her ovaries. Excitedly they decided to extract it and freeze it for us. One day when we are ready they will add my sperm and try to insert it back into her uterus. Just from finding the egg, they had hope that maybe one day she'd start actually having a menstrual cycle and produce more eggs. She was given all kinds of hormones to make it happen, but so far we just had our one egg. Unfortunately it would be very tricky, and there were no guarantees. I prayed often that one day it would be a possibility for us.
Each time I made love to her, I hoped it would happen. I hoped a miracle would take place, just like the miracle she brought to my life. Tonight would be no different. I would worship her with my body, my heart and my soul.
Yes, she was my submissive, and she was the best. Tonight, though, she was my fiancée, and I loved her more than my own life.
Removing her clothes, I gently caressed her body with my fingertips, her smile leaving me breathless. As I entered her finally after three long weeks of being without, I felt that connection again, and I knew I was at home. I was loved, needed, and accepted. I would never regret the gift I had been given. As she sighed against my cheek I knew I was more than at home, I was in heaven.
The end…For now ;)