Disclaimer: Don't own and never will.

AN: This was written for Written for HedwigBlack's Weekly Challenge. This is about as close to an OTP as I get.

Hugo Weasley loved his room.

More specifically, he loved the fact that, despite everything, his room was an oasis of cool blue and bronze in a house that was practically red and gold.

But in the late lazy afternoon of a warm summers day, he heard some sounds that were making it impossible for him concentrate. Sounds he really didn't want to hear EVER, much less while sitting in his room. Sounds coming from his sister's room. His sister's room with her AND Scorpius Malfoy in it. And it didn't take a genius to realise that they probably thought the house was empty, the way they kept on and on.

"Wow, it's huge Scor. How's it going to fit me?" Rose asked and Hugo could swear he could practically hear the pride in Scorpius's voice as he replied.

"All the better to satisfy you with my dear, all the better to satisfy you with," he said and Hugo twisted his face in disgust. He covered his ears with his pillow, but it didn't seem to work. Merlin, hadn't those two ever heard of silencing charms?

"Oooh, don't stop!" he heard Rose plead in a breathless voice. "Oh…wow it feels so good."

"Your tits are amazing Rose," he heard Scorpius say and Hugo smacked the wall. Neither of them seemed to notice and then the sounds of the bed squeaking and bouncing could be heard, slowly getting faster and faster.

"Harder, harder!" Rose screeched and Hugo suppressed the urge to charge in and break Malfoy's nose. Anything just to shut them up, dear Merlin PLEASE.

"Oh my God, you're amazing Rose, so wet and warm," Scorpius said and Hugo reached over to his wand and suddenly hesitated. Rose was not someone he wanted to cross, especially when she had Scorpius with her as well. He was still stinging from that bat-bogey hex she had thrown at him last week. Unfortunately, the next sound he heard did not really help.

"OH MY GOD!" she screamed at the top of her voice. "Don't you DARE pull out now!"

"Dear Merlin, I'm going to hex his balls off. I really don't care anymore!" he snapped in a rare example of him living up to his Weasley temper. "I SHOULDN'T have to listen to those two going at it like rabbits!"

As he reached his front door, he heard a scream of sheer pleasure coming from Rose's room and the sounds of a lot of panting. Merlin, if dad knew what was going on, he'd have a heart attack. And probably kill Scorpius, just for good measure. Which would probably upset Rose and would even upset Hugo a bit, the older boy was a good seeker and was virtually guaranteed to end up with Rose and Hugo was not some brave Gryffindor, but there were some lines he had to draw. And he really couldn't just sit there listening to Malfoy having it off with his sister. Pointing his wand in front of him, he kicked the door open and shouted.

"Right Malfoy, what in Merlin's name do you th-"

The words died in his mouth as he realised what he was looking at. Rose and Scorpius were sitting on her bed, fully dressed. And sitting in-between them was a model of Hogwarts, where their hands were clearly placed inside. There was a moment of stunned silence as nobody seemed to know what to do next. Then Rose's face turned thunderous as she glared at her younger brother.

"Hugo, WHAT do you think you're doing in here?" she shouted angrily and Hugo felt the colour leave his face.

"I...well...um, well..." he stuttered under Rose's death-like glare. "I thought you and Malfoy were..."

"You thought I was doing something I wasn't supposed to be doing?" she asked. "You thought we were having it off?"

At this point Scorpius and Hugo both blushed.

"I heard Scorpius say that you had nice tits!" he protested and Scorpius withdrew his hand from the model and opened it to reveal a small green plastic teat.

"Yes, Rose has the ideal tits for this model. It's virtually impossible to get these in Britain," Scorpius said, nodding at the teat. "What else in Merlin's name WOULD I be talking about?"

"Umm..." Hugo quickly backed out of the room, his face tomato red with a puzzled Scorpius looking at him.

"What was that about? I can't think why he'd think we were...you know..." Scorpius said looking at Rose with a blush, who shrugged her shoulders.

"Beats me," she said. "He must have an over-active imagination."

"Yeah, guess it comes with the family," Scorpius replied with a smirk, before turning his attention back to the model. "Now what next?"