The Epilogue
It was difficult for her to go back to normal life, but they decided that pretending that nothing strange had happen was the best for everyone concerned. Or maybe it was just Dumbledore and Remus that seemed to have already decided that, because they never seemed to think that she would want to do anything else. Dumbledore cast several spells to make her look as young as she did nearly a year ago, or maybe just a few hours ago. She would just seem to age quickly over the summer to catch up with her new physical age. No one would be the wiser if she didn't tell them. But should she? Remus fled the scene as quickly as he could after leaving her with Professor Dumbledore. She supposed that if anyone felt stranger and more unsure about all of this, it would be Remus.
Her second time in fourth year was more exciting than it could have been. It was awful not learning anything new in class time when there was so much more she could be learning, but the Triwizard Tournament was at least exciting. She studied new topics on her own time, but there was not as much free time as she would have liked. She always seemed to be trying to help Harry with a Triwizard task or dealing with teenage drama that she could not help but feel was beneath her. Those boys could be so immature. Victor was nice, though he was upset when she finally told him that she was in love with someone else. He understood more when she said it wasn't Harry or Ron, but an older wizard who said she was too young. He actually became a good confidant, because she could talk to him about Remus without giving him too many specifics and without having to answer the questions that Ron and Harry would have asked. They agreed to continue writing each other after he went back home. Sometimes talking helped, but the heart can be a painful thing, especially when it wants something that it cannot have.
*****Hermione*****
The summer before fifth year was miserable for Hermione, and Christmas was just the same. Being at Grimmauld Place when it was clear that that woman, Tonks, wanted Remus. Who could resist an adult metamorphamagus? Not that Remus was like that, but… And it would be easier to hate Tonks if she weren't so genuine and perfectly likable. Hermione could almost commiserate with her as being in a similar plight, not accepted by the object of their affection. Remus never mentioned Hermione's time in his past directly, but there were glances- her to him and him back to her. Hermione knew that Remus must know what she felt. Once, near the end of summer, after she could not stand Tonks's looks in Remus's direction, she made some silly excuse and ran from the dinner table as quickly as she could. To her surprise and eternal hope, Remus appeared at her doorway moments after she threw herself onto her bed. He must have left everyone else at the dinner table as well, and she briefly wondered what excuse he gave so soon after her own departure. "If it makes you feel better, I'm not interested in her," was all that Remus said before he left, before Hermione could even think of a response. How much did that mean?
She was always near the oldest of her class and the most mature in many ways (after getting over her bratty eleven-year-old self and realizing that a few things were more important that school work). But between that and time travel, she knew she should have been seventeen, feeling like she was playing in a world with children sometimes. She could not celebrate her seventeenth birthday, because everyone thought she was only turning sixteen and all of her friends were still fifteen or even younger. No matter how common place unusual occurrences were to everyone in this world, she felt sure that no one would accept her being closer with Remus, her former professor. She didn't think anyone would even want to hear about how she was really seventeen… Her parents would have been the worst to try to talk to about it. Well, maybe Harry and Ron would have been worse. She had always been nostalgic, never wanting to wish away time, but she would have given anything to age a few years more right now.
Then there was that awful excuse for a witch that controlled everything, Umbitch, as Hermione called her in her head. Hermione never thought that she would feel bad for Professor Trelawney, but anyone was better than that toad. It was a strange year, defying teachers and leading a group of students to the Hog's Head. She peaked into the Hog's Head back room again. It was unchanged. They learned so much, and Hermione watched Harry (and to some extent Ron and others as well) grow in so many ways.
And then everything was terrible when Sirius died. Hermione knew that Harry wasn't in a good place, but she felt sure that Remus wasn't either, and she couldn't even see him. She wasn't even in the room to be there for him when his friend was killed. To have gotten your friend back after all those years, only to lose him again so soon. She heard the story, and she could almost picture Sirius falling through the veil. She could imagine Remus holding Harry back even though his heart was breaking into a million pieces again. Everything must be so hard. As soon as she was cleared from the hospital wing, she knew she had to go see Remus first. The headmaster took pity on her after she pleaded her case, and he led her off school property under the guise of seeing her parents and apparated her to wherever Remus was. Dumbledore left her at the front door. It had been over two weeks from the time that Sirius had died, and she knew that Remus must hardly be in better shape than his old friend.
The house was small with a great deal of land around it, somewhere out in the country. She wondered if it was a family house or if he had bought it with money Sirius left him. She tried to swallow the throbbing lump in her throat. It had been too long. She knew she should have tried to come earlier, but Madame Pomfrey wouldn't hear of it, and she had just only managed to win the battle with the stubborn matron that day. Hermione almost wondered if the Headmaster had said anything to convince Madame Pomfrey. One could never be sure of anything with anything with Albus Dumbledore.
He looked awful when he finally opened the door. Hermione knew it was a full moon that night, the first since Sirius's death. She had known that she needed to come before that happened. She launched herself into Remus without any reservations, wrapping her arms around him, wishing there was more she could do.
Remus stood stiffly, but, to her relief, he quickly wrapped his arms around her as well. "I'm scared to be alone again," Remus spoke into her hair with a shaky voice. He might be able to hold himself together around others, but she could tell that he was a wreck. He continued, "Dumbledore had Severus make me some wolfsbane, but I couldn't even drink it. It hurts too much being me right now. And… Moony needs to mourn… Padfoot too," he said with a slightly rasping voice.
Hermione let him go and looked up in his eyes. She tried to smile, "I was really bored when I had to repeat fourth year," Hermione stated before she started to change. In seconds, a brown owl flapped where she had stood until it came to rest on the arm that Remus held out without thinking.
*****Remus*****
Remus could not help but smile at her. This girl- no, young woman, was truly remarkable. The owl was a thing of beauty as well. Brown eyes that looked just like the chocolate Remus liked so much looked back at him. She had more feathers on her head and closer together than a normal owl, reminding him of her beautiful though seemingly perpetually messy mane of hair. She shifted back into a human form and back into his arms, looking up at him with a sad smile. "There was a chapter in the book you gave me about animagus transformations. Dumbledore made sure that I had all of my things once I was back here. And actually I asked Sirius to send me some notes from when they... I even thought he might have remembered me when he said he wouldn't say anything to Harry," she said, looking up at Remus.
Remus knew he shouldn't kiss her, but everything hurt so much, and he just wanted to feel something good. When he was with her he wasn't alone anymore. And the moon would rise soon.
*****Hermione*****
After that night, Remus still insisted that they shouldn't be together, but Hermione knew that he was wearing thin in his resolve. She did not feel guilty in pushing him a bit either. Hermione thought her gentle nudges might even be helping him in his mourning. She knew that Remus still loved her, and even such an age gap couldn't matter that much. They started writing letters to each other during her sixth year. Sometimes she would pretend she was writing Victor if anyone asked. Usually she just managed not to get caught in her private letter writing. The boys were sweet but often self-absorbed.
Hermione was pleased in her sixth year, when she passed the mark where the rest of the wizarding world finally recognized her as being of age, though she knew that was not likely to help much in the eyes of her friends and family if they were to find out about Remus. She hated calling him "Professor Lupin" around other people, because he could never really be anything but Remus. In some strange way, she thought of them as being "together," and as time passed and as they wrote more letters, she felt confident that Remus felt the same. Despite terrifying revelations of horcruxes and dealing with sometimes unpleasant teachers, the worst Hermione personally had to complain about was Cormac McLaggan. Sixth year was not a bad year until the end.
Almost nothing could be worse than the loss of a near brother, but the loss of a father figure was close, and Remus had lost both in the span of a year. Hermione knew that Remus had looked up to Dumbledore since he had first visited him when Remus was eleven years old. Albus Dumbledore was the man that told young Remus Lupin that they would make special arrangements for him to be able to go to Hogwarts just like any other boy. Hermione felt a bit lost without the wise protector that gave Hogwarts some semblance of a feeling of safety. After all, he was always said to be the only one You-Know-Who feared. However, the loss of Defender of the Light Albus Dumbledore could not compare to the loss of Headmaster Albus Dumbledore, the man who gave Remus a nearly normal life.
Sometimes undergoing great pain can make someone reevaluate their priorities. When Hermione arrived at his door, he didn't even ask how she had gotten there. They held each other, kissing and eventually talking until they both felt almost well enough to face the rest of the world.
"I love you," he whispered near her ear after brushing her wild hair away fondly.
"I love you too," she replied, smiling up at him in a large, genuine smile, though remnants of tears were still visable on her cheeks. "I always have. You just took a little convincing."
A/N: I really hope you have enjoyed! I'm so, so, so excited about this chapter. Please Review! It was so hard deciding where to end the epilogue. I'm still not sure if I'm completely done, but I think that might be all that I have. I thought it was perfect to end it here. I didn't want it to just be announcing who I could see ending up with whom in this slightly altered universe, and how I see things ending out. Also, I would love you guys to get to read the Harry/ Fleur project that I'm still working on, but I needed to finish this project first I think, before posting it. I have found that it is increadibly hard to stay with an update schedule if you are still writing as you go, like I was with most of this story. Anyway, the Harry/Fleur story will be called Taking Her Place, a title I'm very happy with, unlike the title of this story, unfortunately.
Again, please review!