Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games or the song.
The preacher man said let's bow our heads and pray Lord, please lift his soul and heal this hurt Then the congregation all stood up and sang The saddest song that she ever heard
And then they handed her a folded up flag And she held on to all she had left of him Oh, well what could've been And then guns rang one last shot And it felt like a bullet in her heart
Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know I can't even breathe
It's like I'm looking from a distance, standing in the background Everybody's saying he's not coming home now This can't be happening to me, this is just a dream
Just a Dream by Carrie Underwood
Everything is a blur; all I know is that he is gone. My Husband, best friend, and the father of my unborn child, he didn't even know I'm pregnant. I was going to tell him that night through a video chat, when I got home they were waiting to give me the letter. He would have come home today; I should be picking him up from the airport not attending his funeral. I am sobbing uncontrollably, as I watch them lower his casket into the ground. I feel my mother-in-law Hazel put her arm around me and Posy slip her small arms around my waist. Rory and Vick stand silently beside us; it's too painful to look at them, they look exactly like him.
After the funeral, everyone heads to our home; I head up to our bedroom. I can't take it anymore, everyone keeps giving their condolences. Once I am there I go to the closet and grab one of his shirts. Then I go back into our room and grab our wedding photo. I just sit there smelling his shirt, sobbing and looking at the picture of the happiest day of my life. After what seems like hours I hear footsteps coming up the stairs. I lift my head up and see Hazel, Rory, Vick, and Posy.
"Oh, Katniss…."Hazel says as they all come over and sit on the floor with me. We are all sobbing, even Rory and Vick. "I miss him" seven year old Posy whispers, we sob harder. "Me too…..me too." I whisper and place a hand on my stomach.
"Rory, why don't you take Vick and Posy downstairs, and get them something to eat?" Hazel asks and he nods.
I watch them leave, "Have you eaten anything yet?" she asks. "No, but I'm not hungry." she sighs "You need to eat…it's not good for the baby. Now come on sweetheart, let's go eat." I nod. She grabs my hand and we go downstairs; where there are plenty of options.
There is food everywhere and the smells are overpowering. I immediately run to the bathroom, Posy follows me and holds my hair for me. "Thank you" I say afterwards "You're welcome" she says and takes my hand.
As, we walk back to the kitchen she asks "Did Gale know you were going to have baby?" I start sobbing and drop to my knees. "No Posy he didn't" I whisper as I pull her into a hug. "Mama says he is watching over us in heaven…..I bet he is really happy about the baby." Posy says, I nod and hold her tighter. "I bet he is…I bet he is." "He would want you to have piece of him to hold onto." I can't believe this is coming out of a seven year old. "I love you Posy" "I love you too Katniss" she says and rubs my back. "Mama is going to be wondering where we are." she says and pulls away from our hug.
We head back to the kitchen and find it empty, so we go to the dining room. Everyone is there and there are two plates waiting for Posy and I, we take our seats. I'm next Hazel and Vick; I keep looking at the empty seat at the head of the table waiting for Gale to appear. The food sticks to the top of my throat and dinner goes by painfully slow. I just want to curl up in bed and dream about my Gale. I would give anything to feel his arms around me, hear his voice, see his smile, and see his reaction about me pregnant.
"Katniss...is it ok if we stay here tonight?" Hazel asks "Of course" I say, happy that I don't have to be alone. Even though I am used to it, it's different now because I know he's not coming back.
"Why don't y'all head upstairs and get some sleep…..I'll clean up." Hazel says "I'll help" I offer. She shakes her head adamantly and shoos us upstairs. "You know where everything is, right?" I ask once we're upstairs. All three nod and I pull them into a hug. "I love y'all" I say as I walk down the hallway to my bedroom.
I change into Gale's shirt, and play with my wedding ring as I look around our room. There are pictures of us everywhere; I place my hand on my stomach and look at my handsome husband. "Your daddy is the best man ever, did you know that?" I say softly and rub my stomach. I am barely showing "He loves you and is going to be watching over you every day." I whisper to my child. I begin to cry softly, not want to wake the others. Sleep soon overtakes me.