A/N: This was written in March 2009. I decided to fix it up a little. =)
Stevie opened her eyes to find Alex staring down at her.
"OH MY GOD!" she cried, jumping up and almost falling out of the bed. In disbelief, Stevie stared at him as she tried to stop her beating heart from pounding so hard she was sure it was going to explode. "What the hell are you doing here?!" she snapped, still feeling the jolt pulsate through her body.
It was odd that Stevie would wake. She had always been a heavy sleeper and barely woke up when the girls were crashing pots and pans in the kitchen, in the early morning, let alone wake up to a silent bedroom.
As her eyes adjusted to the light, she saw that Alex had pulled a chair up and was silently watching her. In an ordinary situation, Stevie might have wondered if he'd suddenly taken a leave of his senses. But finding him sitting in her bedroom in the middle of the night, didn't scared her, only the fact that she had been jolted awake.
"I'm sorry…" he whispered sounding hoarse. "I couldn't sleep."
"So you come into my room in the middle of the night?!" she accused. Stevie walked over to the door and flicked the light on. Alex was dressed in jeans and an open black shirt and looked like he'd been to hell and back. Stevie couldn't help thinking how sexy he looked with the shirt unbuttoned. She turned her eyes from him, conscience that she was staring.
Suddenly, she realised that she was wearing only her COWGIRL t-shirt, and no pants. She was quick to climb back into bed and cover herself with the blanket.
It wasn't that she hadn't dreamt of Alex in her bedroom, on more than one occasion, but there was something too real about this time, and it made her think that it wasn't just another nightly routine.
For the first time since she woke, she looked at his face and realised there were tears in his eyes.
"Alex… are you okay?" she asked gently. She wanted to put her arms around him, but she felt vulnerable dressed only in a t-shirt.
"She lied to me, Stevie…" he told her.
She didn't have to ask what he was talking about.
"I feel so stupid," he went on. "How could I be so naïve? I was never that way with women before, was I?" he questioned.
Stevie shrugged. Actually, he had, but she wasn't about to tell him that. It would only open a can of worms she didn't want to deal with… couldn't deal with. Alex stood from the chair and pulled back the covers, climbing into the bed beside her. her body began to shake.
"Alex…" she whispered. She didn't know what was happening.
He looked at her, and then gently cupped his hands around her face. All the while, Stevie was shaking. This was so much like the many dreams she had, only this time there were feelings involved, real-life butterflies and a beating heart. "You're trembling," he stated.
"Yeah," she replied, barely sound.
Slowly, Alex leaned closer to her until his mouth was on hers. A moment later she was out of control, the thoughts and emotions that had been building up for so many years exploded in that one kiss. His mouth moved over hers with unhurried reverence, slowly and passionately, until Stevie gave in to her own emotions and soon enough was kissing him back with as much force and emotion as he was. Her hands moved around his neck, bunching up the fabric of his shirt around his neck, while his hands slid over her thighs and pulled her closer to him with one swift move.
Stevie moaned softly as the electric sensation of their kiss took over all thoughts in her mind. She felt sure that this feeling, this passion and emotion could not be generated by any other man. Her mouth moved to deepen the kiss. Her cheeks felt wet. A voice in her head told her to stop, and with every ounce of strength she had left in her body, she pushed at him gently, until he stopped kissing her.
She looked up at him, and saw that he was crying. Reaching out she wiped the tears away gently with her fingers, saying nothing. He had no reason to be embarrassed. It wasn't the first time she had seen him cry, and she believed it wouldn't be the last.
"It's okay," she assured him.
Despite the fact that he had initiated the moment, it was Stevie who felt he needed reassuring. Her head and heart were still numb, and she was yet to feel the impact of their actions.
Alex shook his head. "No, it's not. Fiona was never pregnant, Stevie!" he stated matter-of-factly.
Stevie nodded, thinking about nothing but their kiss and wanting to do it all over again. "I know…"
"You know?" he looked at her in surprise, pulling back a little. "How do you know?"
"I found out weeks ago," she told him honestly. That news was not her main priority at the moment. It was old news. The kiss that she had shared with Alex a moment ago, was her focus. She forced herself to concentrate on what he was saying. Fiona, she told herself, he was talking about Fiona. Remembering, Stevie felt the same blow she had experienced when it had happened. "The night before you got married. I wanted to tell you, Alex… God, I wanted to tell you. But by the time I found you, you were already married. I didn't see the point in ruining it all for you…" she explained.
Alex nodded, seemingly understanding what she was telling him. He reached out to her again, and this time he brought her into his arms and held her. She lay her head on his chest and closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of his embrace and the feeling of safety that only he could provide.
"I'm so sorry," she whispered, against his open shirt.
"Everything," she pulled him at arm's length. "I'm sorry I never told you about the baby. I let you believe that she was-"
Alex shook his head firmly and gripped his hands tightly around her waist. "It's okay, Steves. I don't blame you."
"Okay," she nodded.
Alex frowned then, as if the realisation of what had just happened between the two of them suddenly dawned on him. "What am I doing? I have to go…" he climbed out of the bed then, releasing Stevie, and headed straight for the door.
"Alex?" she called.
He turned around and looked at her. "I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?"
Stevie nodded, unsure of what else to say.
Alex closed her bedroom door behind him, leaving Stevie alone in her bedroom, trembling and reeling from the moment that had sparked something between them. He's married. He's married. She reminded herself over and over again.
When Stevie woke the next morning, she had no reason to believe that he had been in her bedroom. There was no trace of him. No left clothing or empty beer bottle on the night stand. The only evidence was the chair he had pulled up to the bed and the tingle on her lips, left by his kiss.
All day she thought about him, waiting for him to come over, like he said he would. Stevie busied herself in farm work and took shorter breaks. It was easier to put all her energy and thinking into work, rather than go crazy thinking about the previous night and all the complications that went with it. She wasn't even sure she wanted to see him today. All she knew was that the entire situation was confusing. It was what she had wanted for so long now, and yet the idea of having an affair made her feel sick.
She was NOT that type of person. Stevie was a woman of morals and standards. She was no home-wrecker.
"Stevie, can you help me move the mob from skinny Jim's?" Jodi asked. They were running behind today. It was one of those days where nothing was on time and too many things were going wrong.
"Yeah," she nodded. She followed Jodi to the white Ute and climbed into the driver's side. Stevie took them both to Skinny Jim's paddock to meet up with the others, who were still busy trying to get the cattle into another paddock. They would be drenched and ready for sale by tomorrow.
It was late by the time they arrived back at Drover's, and when she saw Alex's Ute parked out the front of the house, her stomach exploded into agitated butterflies. She took her time getting out of the Ute and leisurely made her way up to the house.
The girls went on with work.
In the kitchen, Alex was standing near the fridge. She came in and went straight to the sink, and turning to face him.
"Hi," he said, approaching her with more caution than he had the night before.
"Hey," she replied awkwardly.
Alex looked around to make sure they were alone. "I'm sorry I came into your room last night," he said.
Stevie's heart started thudding wildly in her chest. "It's fine," she replied. But it wasn't fine. He had kissed her. He had cheated on his wife, despite her own deceptions. Two wrongs didn't make a right.
"I wanted to-"
"It's fine, really." Stevie thought that he was going to tell her that it was mistake and he was a wreck, and it meant nothing. Stevie didn't want to hear that.
"Stevie… I wanted to-"
"Alex," she insisted. She couldn't stand to hear the words. Thinking them was enough. It already hurt to know that he didn't want her, not the way she wanted him, or else he would have stayed the night before. "You don't have to explain anything, really… it's fine." She forced a smile.
"I'm not explaining anything," he said. "And I'm not apologising for what happened last night, if that's what you're thinking. I'm just sorry it happened the way it did. I just think that we should talk about it, don't you?"
"I dunno," she shrugged nervously. Talking was overrated. What she wanted to do was throw her arms around his neck and kiss him again and again.
"Are you sorry it happened?"
Stevie shook her head. "Um… I don't-… no, Alex. I'm not sorry. Are you sorry?"
"No," he smiled, shaking his head.
"What now?" she asked.
"I talked to Fi, and told her that it was over. I didn't love her anymore… I'm not sure I ever did. I think I just needed something to fill my head after what happened with Harry. I filed the divorce papers this morning. Stevie, I-"
"I love you, Stevie… God, I love you!" he looked vulnerable as he waited for her to respond. It took a moment for all the information to sink in. He had filed for divorced. He had left Fiona and he was claiming that he never loved her, but loved Stevie. It seemed like one of her routine night dreams, far too good to be true.
"Are you going to say something," Alex looked nervous now.
Cautiously, she took a step towards him. He took that as a good sign and approached her, gently reaching out to touch her face. "Oh, Alex… I love you, too," she smiled weakly.
Alex nodded then and pulled her into his arms. "I wanted to stay with you last night," he confessed. "Don't think I walked away confused. For the first time since Claire… I just, I had clarity. It all made sense. It all seemed to fit. You fit with me, Steves!"
"Where?" she smiled.
He took her hand and placed it over his heart. "Here! You belong right here."
"Really?" she asked, as the tears filled her eyes.
"Yes," he nodded with assurance. "Ever since you wagged your bottom in front of my face," he teased.
Stevie laughed. "I knew it!"
"Knew what?" he asked, kissing her softly on the mouth.
"I knew you were checkin' me out in the car that day," she grinned cheekily. "I felt your eyes on me."
"I can't remember a time that my eyes weren't on you…" he stated. "You're beautiful, Stevie. I love you… so much."
"You're not so bad yourself, spunk," she laughed, standing on her tippy toes to kiss him.
She finally had her happy ending.
A/N: I seriously LOVE "trembling on the brink" (Hence, the reference to the wiggling bottom). I love it because it's the first time that Stevie & Alex realize that they're more than mates, and the fun really begins to take off. It's got to be my FAV episode of all time. What's your favourite AND why? Drop me a line and let me know.