I had been chosen to go to Harvard, I was chosen for the internship, and those were almost the only really good things that happened in my life. My dad left when I was 5 and my mom was a drunk. She died from drinking when I was 8. Ever since then I worked for a living and lived with my brother. I went to a school where people teased me about my hair, my glasses, my clothes, then one day I saw this one girl an I guess I went a little crazy. Her name was Alyssa and she took Algebra with me in junior high. She was BEAUTIFUL. Ever since then I have never loved a boy and girls became my only loves. Alyssa moved to Canada with her family and I can't afford that. Plus it would be weird. I would have to say, "I came to be with you because I have a crush on you." and think of how awkward THAT would be! I have been lesbian since I was 12. Now I'm 22 and in Harvard Law School, one of the most famous schools in the world. I've been lesbian for TEN YEARS OF MY LIFE.
That's pretty much how I lived when I was younger, my brother died in a car crash two years ago so I have no family left. Nothing. It's horrible. I can barely afford clothes so my clothes are rattier than they were a couple years ago. I'm also very messy, so my room has books and papers everywhere. I sit on my bed and start some research when I hear what sounds like crying from across the hall.
I go to her door and knock; she stops crying and opens the door. Her hair is half up half down and she's wearing clothes that are as ratty as mine. She smiles weakly and I sigh.
"You okay, Vivienne?" I ask her slowly, she smiles a little but tears spring to her eyes. Her eyes sparkle in the dim hall lights and she embraces me. I'm startled at first but I hug her back, hoping it'll make her feel better. I have an attitude but I'm a sensitive person. When I g to sleep I tell my pillow all my feelings I held in and when I wake up my pillow is soaking. People see me as a tough person, but I have feelings. I know what people feel when someone they love dies. I wipe the tears from Vivienne's eyes and she sniffles a little.
"I'm fine, thanks. It's just… Warner I got into a fight about something stupid and I don't know why, but it feels like we're slipping apart and I can't stop us from doing it. Sure, we're engaged but now Elle's here and what if he falls in love with her again? I could never put my heart back together!" Vivienne talks quickly and her voice cracks with each word, the fact that she's this sad makes me feel like I'm not safe. She's always tough and smart with something to say and she makes me feel like nothing bad will ever happen again. I bring her into my room and toss some books aside to make space for us to sit on the bed.
"If Warner loves Elle then he doesn't deserve you. You can always put your heart back together. I can tell you, I've been there before." I said quietly, hoping that would cheer her up a little.
"Thanks… Have you ever felt like you were… I don't know, unwanted?" She asked slowly and so quietly I could barely understand her.
I smiled. Of course I did, I was lesbian and people didn't like me as much because of that. "Practically all the time. Being lesbian makes me different, so people don't look at me as a normal person anymore. I'm kinda a freak to them. Why?" I could tell she was blushing now and something tells me she didn't know why she had asked, so I smiled a little and her eyes glistened in the full moon's light. She had the most beautiful green eyes… Okay, I'm acting weird now. She shrugs.
"I have no idea, it felt like this conversation was getting awkward but I think that made it more so." She giggled and I giggled like a little girl for the first time since I was 11. It felt kinda good then I got a thought, it wasn't a really good one, but I knew what to do…