Alright, first installment of my story with the T.V. series, The Office. By the way, this is set up around season 5 or 6, but excluding Pam's pregnancy. Not cause I don't like that, It's just not the most important thing in this fic. So, yeah, I hope you read it and keep reading it until the end. By the way, even though the rating is T, doesn't necessarily mean it's very bad. Just saying. Disclaimer: I do not own the Office, its rights to episodes, or the characters. This is just a fun idea I had for a potential episode. Please enjoy! :)
Michael's Dundy Day
It was going to be a good day. Michael could just feel it in the pit of his gut, or was that upset stomach from all those pizzas last night? Michael shrugged the thought away and bore a broad smile as he pulled his convertible into the Scranton building parking lot, top proudly down with the confidence of a cloudless sky and the bumper of his car unknowingly running over a tiny mouse. With even more glee from his obliviousness, he skipped out of the car, taking in a large whiff of the air (which was contaminated with a nasty smell from the dumpsters near by.) and eagerly strolled up to the office doors, but was stopped by the curious cameras pressing on to him.
This didn't annoy Michael, in fact, he delivered a pleased smile and spoke on his own terms, "do you see why this very handsome man has a smile on his face? Well, it is because of this day, this glorious day that we are going into."
The camera exchanged a look with another camera and rushed close to Michael when he entered the building. Everything felt right around Michael the moment his astonishingly polished shoes stepped on to the beige floors (actually, it was dust layered over white concrete, since nobody bothers to clean it). Everything felt worth the while, so when he glanced towards the mini café on the floor he was in, he hopped up to Hank and ordered one pound of plain vanilla cake. Hank's response was the same; dull with a pinch of despise. The smile still on Michael's face pushed him to fulfill the order and Michael swiveled back to the camera.
"Honestly, ever since I woke up today, a wonderful feeling of something good just sparked inside of me, the thing is, I have no idea what's the special thing," Michael admitted, still feeling excited. All of a sudden, Michael turned back to the counter where Hank placed his order for just a moment to crunch the numbers, and he deliberately groped the cake, ignoring utensils or plates and even by passing Hank's shocked expression for receiving no money for it. Michael went the extra mile, not wanting to drag the hop in his step and took the stairs speedily.
No words proceeded from Michael as he was stuffing his face with cake that he occasionally gagged at and the cameras began to grow awkward. After being unable to take it no longer, the main camera aimed at Michael inhaled to speak, but then Michael jumped around, cake clogging his speech and even flying to the camera lens. "I love the feeling I have, just look, I'm eating this cake and, gah-... it taste horrible!" He gagged mightily, but kept hiking upward anyway, "I just really want to know why today is heavily loaded with happiness, like a full diaper that spreads joy instead of stink."
He sprung up the final step while also tossing the cake lump to the floor and suddenly sidled on the walls towards the office door. He peeked around the clear surface and spotted Erin taking a call and glimpses of the other office members simply at work. They had no idea an intriguing adventure was on the rise once Michael burst through the door, "hello everybody!"
Everyone's eyes flew to Michael (except for Stanley, whose mind was locked in the world of cross puzzles and tasteless coffee.) who was so excited, he could only produce a smile that soon burst into a laugh. No one was catching on to Michael's happiness and his grin started to fade away after looking over the faces of his workers.
"Well?" Michael finally questioned, raising more eyebrows, "aren't you guys excited?"
Still, more silence and more question marks and Jim fiddled with a pen in his fingers, "I try not asking this question, but why should we be excited?"
"'Cause!" was his enthusiastic answer, his lip starting to quiver and his arms flying to his sides, "you guys know what! It's that special time of the year!"
Even Michael was beginning to bemuse himself, but with chatter growing amongst the workers upon the special thing, Pam stood up and approached Michael with the answer, "um, Michael, I think we've all realized now what the special occurrence is, but I've told you several times not to say it in public."
"What are you talking about?" Jim bit his lip at this. With Michael, anything as inappropriate as making love in an awkward spot wouldn't pass by him with out announcing it first.
Pam lowered her eyes nervously, looking back at the others for support. All she got were eyes darting to every corner of the office with no clue of what to do. She sighed, wondering why it's always her to have to say these things and inched to him, "look Michael... you can't enlarge your... you know what so the chances of making a family while also experiencing the joys of-"
"Oh, no, no Pam, that's not the news!" Michael groaned in disgust and Pam sat back to her desk awkwardly, "besides, It's naturally big enough for twice the enjoyment (Angela rolled her eyes at this from above the accounting wall).
"No, no seriously, guys, guess the good news for today!" he tried again with more energy, now officially wrapping in the whole office's attention by getting into their minds and making them ponder.
"Oh, I think I know," Phyllis piped up in her usual, motherly voice and Michael raised his eyebrows attentively, "today's the day you decide who you were going to give a bonus to. If I'm not mistaken, you were considering me."
"Oh..." Michael worded, attempting to remember what happened just the day before. Suddenly, Michael reached into his pocket, taking out a check book and writing down a fabulous amount of cash inside. "I think you're right, here's your bonus. Sorry Phyllis."
"No Michael, don't listen to her!" Dwight hollered and snatched the check from his loose finger tips, making the bother of throwing it away for Michael easier by pocketing it in his mustard shirt, "you know how Phyllis is, the woman lies. The real reason today is so great is because the country famous beet parade is being hosted just near Schrute farms and you have finally acknowledged that, allowing the two of us to hang out.
"We'd better get going now before it gets crowded," Dwight resumed, rummaging through his drawers for his car keys, but this conversation turned to mostly himself and Michael dropped his jaw in atrocious.
"No, Dwight, I can say with confidence that that's not why I'm so happy today," attention turned to the others, but Dwight became visibly upset by this and slowly slumped back to his chair. "Okay people, keep getting the ball rolling, we're getting close."
"Um," a soft sound that was barely picked up, Angela still lifted a fragile hand up anyway while keeping a stiff face and remarked, "could it possibly be annual kitten day."
"No, no, I wouldn't get excited for that," mumbled Michael. What a waste, since Angela had her scruffy cat, Bandit, tucked underneath her thin arms.
"Hey, boss man!" Andy called out with a curled hand to the ceiling.
"Yes, Andy?" He acknowledged, but by the goofy smile on Andy's face, he scrunched his face in regret.
"Today's that one special day where we gain dozens of new, loyal costumers, all thanks to me," Andy pitched with pride, although with a cracked smile around the end, one could assume that he played this as a joke.
Michael stifled a chortle at this, "come on Andy, let's get real."
Even though he was right, Andy bit his lower lip painfully, angry at himself for being so ignorant by having to choke down what he foolishly served up. Just then, Kelly stepped out of the kitchen, looking over some files delivered from the annex while being completely oblivious to the arousing news displayed in the main office. "Ah, Kelly, good, maybe you can help," Michael threw his hand out in Kelly's direction and a discomforting feeling stirred in nearly everyone's stomachs, "is there any Hindu holiday that's going on today or sometime this month? You Indians just love to get crazy. Oh, black awareness day? Eh, Stanley."
Stanley slowly looked up at Michael, grunted disapproval, then returned to his nearly finished crossword puzzle. Being more subjected to insults, Kelly folded her arms over her chest after flinging the files aside, "you know what Michael, sometimes you push it, and like a quote I live by once said: (Well, this part's a little inappropriate. Let's just say that Kelly said something that one should never say to a boss, leaving jaws hanging and exiting the room with a flip of the finger.)"
Michael was left speechless from the comment, so were the co-workers, but Michael eventually patted his cheeks to get back into the mind frame and said just as excitedly moments ago, "alright people, let's just forget about that and keep going. Come on, tell me more, what's so exciting!?"
"That's alright guys, we give up," Jim brusquely declared finally, shooting up from his seat and extending his arms out to the co-workers, "Michael, why don't you just tell us what the news is?"
Instantly, Michael bit his lip, eyes glazed over and his face blank. Jim continued to stare at Michael, the announcement not escaping him so Jim sighed after much consideration. "You don't know what the good news is, do you," Jim stated rather than asked. Without having to receive in answer, the wavering features on Michael's face had made the situation blatantly clear.
With the silent tension intensifying, the other workers were soaking in the obvious and Michael finally gave in, "okay, fine I don't know what it is."
Like a chorus, everyone groaned loudly and Michael shook his head, "even though I don't know what it is, I have this very strong feeling that there are big things to come today."
"Oh, do you mean like that one time where you were determined to score a date with a lady you met online, but it turned out to be a guy who was attracted to you?" Kevin exaggerated with large facial movements, ending the question with a stifled 'gross' and giggling, completely missing Oscar's offended pout.
"Nope, nope, it's nothing like that Kevin," Michael retorted, clenching his fists and teeth. He shook his head violently, now having enough of their ignorance, now piled with insolence. Michael spun around to Erin who had kept her lips sealed the entire time... surprisingly, "okay, I've had enough. Erin, you are the one who is on top of events, tell me, what special occurrence is going on today."
With out an air of hesitation, Erin dug through her drawer until she gripped a calendar, flipping it to the current month. Erin analyzed the page swiftly, then tucked a lock of her auburn hair, "well, according to this calendar... today's a birthday day."
Suddenly, the mood was lifted with a breath of realization and workers nodded in comprehension. Michael spread a toothy smile and Erin giggled light-heartedly as he clutched the ridge of her desk and turned to face everyone else, "ah, finally, the truth comes out, see I knew there was something eventful today!
"Alright, alright, so whose birthday is it today?" Michael asked sweetly with a clap of his hands. The other workers were smiling contently, gazing over the others to see who would fess up. Again, the squeamish sound of silence was all that was delivered and people's smiles erased. "Come on..." Michael tried again, always maintaining that jovial attitude and eyeing every single person. "Whose birthday is it?"
The citizens of the office began to shoot interested and or glares at others. No question about it, birthday parties in the office can actually be quite enjoyable (You know, as long as it's not Toby's birthday), so why not proudly admit the occasion?
"Come on," Erin said brightly, waving the calendar in the air, "it's says birthday, so don't be shy and let us know."
"Yeah, whose birthday is it?" Kevin jumped from his seat, his voice booming with slight irritation, "the sooner we know, the faster we get cake!"
Michael arched backwards, his palms exposed, his shoulders cocked and his face begging for an answer, but with still no luck (shocker.), Michael groaned heavily and swiveled back to Erin, "um, does it say the name of the person?"
Erin squinted her eyes back on today's date, then her lips pursed and twitched. She grew coy under Michael's watchful eye, but gradually rested her eyes to his, "it doesn't say, it was erased."
He didn't want to make things so dramatic, but he was genuinely shocked that no one wanted to come forward. It's a party, that's fun! Michael cracked his head to the side, frustration pumping inside and he lunged himself back to the crowd, a determined twinkle in his eye, "okay, so apparently, we have someone in the office who doesn't want to admit that it's their birthday today. I don't see why, I would be there (Pam glimpsed a concerned look to the camera. That's probably the reason why no one will talk).
"It's alright everyone, just tell me who is the one. You don't have to be so afraid," Michael urged almost forcefully. The office goers continually shared glances, others like Pam biting her nail or Stanley paying no attention what so ever. Michael lowered his lids and puffed out his bottom lip, "you know what, I'm getting sick and tired of reading 'the workers were quiet, exchanging glances' crap. Someone needs to just tell me who is turning an age, you can even do it in private, either way, I will be slaving over the party until you say otherwise."
"Um, Michael, I don't think that's necessary," most of the workers sputtered in their own times, but Michael whipped his arms around and moaned.
"Nope, that's my decision, that's all that we'll be doing today-"
"But Michael, some of us have important sales and clients to get to," a wave of objections lapped at his feet, but Michael blocked their "indifference" with noisy, pitchy singing and jogged to his office with a loud slam behind him, silencing everyone.
The batch of unlikely co-workers all individually looked at one another with either confusion or annoyance. Glares soon faded to an expression akin to being lost and Jim looked up at the camera.
"Well, to be brutally honest... I don't think Michael has it right," Jim had told the cameras after being whisked away to a private interview. Choosing Jim to be the voice of all the office goers seemed smart since he was the one who seemed to comprehend the most. Secretly, as Jim twirled the blue pen in his fingers, he was actually befuddled as well as enticed by this news. At first thought, it really isn't something to center your whole day on, which is what Michael will be doing, but after going over it a second time, you start to realize that this could be a fun experience. You know, if you're anything like Jim.
Jim suddenly ceased his twirling, catching the pen in his fist awkwardly and biting his lower lip, "in reality, things feel like it will be a downwards spiral of nothing good... which is why I'm so interested."
Michael was sitting at his desk, tapping the floor and the desk feverishly. The camera's zoomed in carefully on his shaking posture until he threw his head up and slammed the desk, "I-I can't believe no one wants to confess that it's their birthday. I can't mentally grasp why they wouldn't."
Michael started becoming distracted by his little trinkets on his desk and continued in muse, "birthdays in the office are, like, the funest thing other than Christmas, New Years... shot parties! I just... don't understand, but oh well. If this certain person doesn't want to come forward, I, Michael G. Scott will personally fabricate their party into the best one ever, because today will be a good day. I swear it!"
Michael then ended his speech with an animated smile and the cameras eventually nodded and snapped it off with his positivity still hanging in the air. Will it stay there long, though? The cameras weren't so sure, but whatever the outcome, they were thrilled to capture it.
Well, that was the first chapter, and I must admit, I don't really like how it turned out. For starters, it is one of the shortest chapters I've written so far. Honestly, I had planned on making other stories before this one, but then I really felt I should write a story with Michael since he is such a memorable character. I also wanted to write another story fast so I randomly came up with this plot that I have no idea if it will either be exceptional, or a train-wreck. If you don't like it, please bare with me since the other chapters will be better (for some reason, I have thought the middle and end of the story more thoroughly). Also, please don't forget to review, it would mean a lot since this is my first Office story... with Michael. :|