A/N: Cross over! This is why you don't read crossovers that are amazing but are few!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or the Avengers. I dabble in plot bunnies. I played with the time line as well, it's been moved up by several years, how many? F if I know, it is, I will tell you, 2012. Other than that? Eeeeeeh, I'm not certain. Probably nine. The Wizarding world is still backwards, but WWW has started progressing and they now have magical items similar to Muggle items, you'll see. =)


Pear Shaped

Chapter 1: Mishandled Business

Harry was pissed. Wait perhaps pissed was too mild a term. Harry was enraged so far past the point of reason it came to where it was pure blank focus. Hyper focused and hyper sensitive he glared at the new Minister of Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt and yelled, "DEATHEATERS ENDED UP WHERE?!" The last word was a drawn out hiss and the other man hunched a bit.

"Harry I understand you're upset," Shaklebolt said shuffling papers awkwardly. Harry slammed his palms down flat on the wooden table, his magic flared violently cracking it and the window in the office. The Minister suppressed a flinch. At twenty-two Harry Potter had served the last five years an Unspeakable, no training needed or required. The young man in front of him had obtained a new power level that the modern Wizarding world hadn't seen in centuries. There were talk in the shadier and more secretive parts of the Department of Mysteries that he might be as powerful as Merlin.

"Upset?" He hissed. "I fought a bloody war, spent the past five years hunting down those flaming bastards and you tell me that they've joined up with the Muggle Mafia in the United States of America?! What the bloody hell Shacklebolt! I thought we got the last of them six months ago! That's why I agreed to taking a two month vacation. I leave and come back to THIS bullshit?! What do you want from me? Am I or am I not your most powerful Hit Wizard? Unspeakable? Am I not being groomed to be head of that department in the next ten years or is something else expected of me?" The Minister flinched with accusation and shuffled his papers a few more times before giving up.

"I thought we had wiped them out!" Kingsley finally snapped back. "You know how difficult it is to learn who all served him. Not all were bloody marked! Plus there were, and ARE, plenty of dark sympathizers that are trying to rally around a new power! Some still think you soft for your decision on not committing a genocide of their magical side. Or did forget you spared the Malfoys' during their trials three years ago?"

"That's different!" Harry barked, "and you damn well know why I did it as well. Either way, their either on house arrest for another five years in the case of Draco Malfoy, or like Lucius Malfoy is for interim! Narcissa Malfoy was never involved and saved my life, thus saving Britain. I paid my dues or are you forgetting who got saddled with the responsibility of saving the whole British Wizarding World, at least five times?"

"Enough!" Kingsley said throwing his hands up. "What do you want me to do? I've got the United Magical States of North America (UMSNA) breathing down my neck, as well as Wizengamot! Those damn bats are driving me up the bloody hellish wall! They're terrified we'll be dealing with another Dark Lord, but this time from foreign shores!" Harry and Kingsley both went silent. Harry paced front of the fireplace dragging his hands through his hair, his plain Unspeakable robes silently drifting around him, a paradox to his hazardous movements. He finally stopped.

"What's the bloody UMSNA breathing down your neck for?" Harry asked plopping down in the chair in front of Kingsley. The older black man sighed before scrubbing his face.

"They're trying to wash their hands of the whole thing," the minister grumbled. "They don't want to be dealing with 'British' terrorist. Never mind that the fact their Muggle side discovered a rare and ancient artifact and are testing it without a wizard or witch supervising." Harry groaned in misery shoving his face into his hands.

"Goddammit!" He snapped. "Fucking bureaucrats! What the hell are they thinking? Did they even say what the blasted thing is?" Kingsley winced and started shuffling papers again, highly agitated. The man finally stopped, stood, and paced the room like a caged tiger.

"You're not going to like this..." The man said finally stopping. Harry arched a brow as if asking if there had been a chance of him liking it. The other man smirked sardonically. "The Muggle side has recently rediscovered the Tesseract." Kingsley braced for the explosion that followed, mentally thankful for the privacy and silencing wards around his office. He wasn't disappointed.

"THOSE IDIOTS' MUGGLE SIDE FOUND ONE OF THE MOST DANGEROUS POWER BASED MAGICAL ARTIFACTS AND THEIR MAGICAL GOVERNMENT DIDN'T INTERVENE?! DO THEY WANT TO GET KILLED OR REVEALED?!"


None to say the least it took several hours to calm Harry down, and poor Kingsley required an entirely redecorated and fixed office afterward. The man labeled the Chosen One, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Savior of the Wizarding World, sat slumped against the wall next to Kingsley a bottle of firewhiskey half drunken in his hand.

"What do you need me to do Kings?" Harry asked tiredly. The tirade, and the long port key from the Bahamas, finally catching up with him. It was a little after two am, dawn a good three hours away. His long blood red robes, lacking both his markings as a Commander in the Hit Wizard squads, were slightly burnt, slashed and knotted in places. He could change into his better outfits with a simple switching charm, but he didn't bother with it right now. He had more important things, like his alcohol, to worry about.

"I was hoping you wouldn't mind heading overseas. I need you to see if you can't talk them into you supervising the Tesseract and the studies. I'll be sending trained squads after the Deatheaters to back up their limited military. I just need you to try to keep it from going absolutely pear shaped." Kingsley said tiredly taking a drink from his own bottle of firewhiskey. Harry, even when loosing control, made sure to spare his liquor cabinet which he was absolutely thankful for, he wouldn't know what he'd do without his liquor or headache potions some days. Tired and more than a little half drunk, Harry giggled and said.

"Ah, hell, when I get called in it's already going pear shape, let's just hope it doesn't reach 'saving the world' stage til after I get there." The black man snorted and scrubbed his bald head, fingering a few scars.

"You'll leave as soon as you can?" Kingsley queried. Harry nodded after knocking back a large gulp of liquor.

"Let me get some shit in order, pick up some crap, take a shower, and write a letter to 'Mione and I'll catch the first Ministry made port key to the District of Columbia I can. You'll handle the paperwork?" Harry said capping his alcohol and shrinking it to go.

"There'll be an owl going out as soon as you leave, I'll send a copy to you." The other man responded.

"Good, I'm going to finish this bottle to go, and make sure to pack a few Sober-Up potions. I'll be leaving before, at, or slightly after dawn." Harry clambered to his feet. Giving the man a nod, Harry left the office rather unsteadily. As the door shut with a final click, Kingsley chugged his firewhiskey back for a few minutes before gasping.

"I bloody well hope he doesn't make another crater, it's fucking hard to label them all as gas explosions."


Harry Potter stood firmly as he landed in the port-in area of the UMSNA ministry building. Strolling through the atrium he stopped before a blank black wall and tapped his wand against it irritably. It opened and the fellow wizards in the area stared after him gobsmacked, although there few being it only slightly after midnight there. After all, a foreign Unspeakable in Commander Robes was not something one saw everyday. Stomping down the metal gangway he entered an elevator and jabbed the Minister Office button with irritation, they shut and Harry nursed the lingering headache from his hangover. The doors opened to a brightly lit hallway with multiple white, unmarked doors, and a neatly dressed Caucasian in a black suit with Scribe robes waiting to greet him.

"Unspeakable Commander Phoenix?" He queried Harry waved at him impatiently. His robe's hood was drawn up as per regulations, obscuring his face. His blood red robes with twin black lines drawing down from his shoulder's black with gold trim to the robe's black and gold stripped borders. The robes were closed to his waist opening to show the black dragon skin pants and thigh high black and silver lined dragon leather boots. The sleeves of the robes were body conforming allowing for no loose fabric and no determent of movement and covered in black dragon leather gloves and gobling steel studs. An imposing figure, the minor official thought with a slight tremor of fear. He bowed and ushered the Unspeakable into a long rectangular meeting room. He closed the door after him, leaving him waiting alone. Finally a wall section opened and the UMSNA president, George M. Corners, and Secretary of Magical Defenses, Earl Greynolds, strode in.

"Commander, it's just so splendid to have you here! I must say, it's not often we get someone of your caliber here. You'll be taking in the sights I trust?" the man said jovially. Harry's eyes narrowed dangerously. He didn't take the hand offered, and Greynolds had already guessed the two military men would greet each other once the 'idiot in charge' left.

"I do hope you aren't considering my coming here a fun side trip, President," Harry whispered lowly. The man flinched before clearing his voice, and dropped his hand, wiping it nervously against his pants.

"Erm, yes, please take a seat." Corners motioned, the Defense Secretary seemed to be growing more and more irritated with the pudgy round flesh calling itself the leader of his country. Harry looked the stern, sleet gray haired man in the eye, and a feeling of understanding seemed to pass between them. All negotiations would be between them, the 'president' was obviously unable to make the correct military decision, though would serve as a slightly adequate political and social figure.

"I was informed by my Minister that you have word on the terrorists that plagued us in the last war, as well as an artifact of immense importance." Harry rasped. His voice was cloaked, just as his face and body, a series of spells meant to prevent his identity from being known by anyone of lesser importance.

"Indeed," the Defense Secretary said in a cold voice. "We've been tracking them for the past year, although our president only recently decided to inform your government of the proceedings. The artifact has not been dealt with in the least." Harry's eye twitched. Behind him the door's wooden frame cracked. The President paled while the Defense Secretary seemed to be in silent agreement with the clear sign of annoyance and power. It would take a powerful wizard to handle all the necessary affairs, on top of handling two enormous and potentially deadly screw ups.

"Is that so? Is this another Mjolnir incident, President Corners?" Harry said coldly. The man flinched. "Are you going to leave this to the Muggles as well?"

"We-well..." The man sputtered.

"The President isn't going to prevent you from intervening Commander Phoenix. He's merely here to welcome you and promise you his assistance while you are here in the UMSNA. You'll be working as a liaison with me." Greynolds cut in. The President looked at him thankfully while Harry bit back the urge to punt the fat little idiot out of the room. It was hard to believe, but the man seemed to be even worse than Fudge, what was with complete idiots gaining office?

"Oh, well then, I thank you for your welcome. Is there anything else you think you can accomplish with me being here?" Harry said a fraction more warmly. The man paled and shook his head in denial.

"I-I'll leave you boys to your work, if you need anything-" The man trailed off and finally left. Harry looked at Greynolds and sighed in annoyance.

"I believe Kings said he'd be sending Potter?" The man asked. Harry shoved shoved back his hood with a nod. He watched the other man study his face and wondered what Greynolds stared at most. The lightning bolt scar, perhaps? Maybe the Avada Kevada green eyes no longer blocked by thick chunky glasses. Hell, even the fire scars that trailed up the left side of his face from a run in with Fiendfyre that hadn't gone nearly as well as the time in the Room of Requirement might be catching his gaze. Sizing each other up the pair stood once more and greeted each other with firm handshakes. "An honor to meet you Harry Potter."

"Me too, Greynolds, Kings always complained about never being able to convince you to transfer to Britain, even with those bribes." Harry replied with a slight grin before growing serious. "I believe Kingsley sent me here in hopes, in his terms, this doesn't go pear shaped. Or at least to minimize it."

"I won't lie to you Commander Phoenix," he growled angrily, tiredly, changing back to the codename. "It's a clusterfuck of Alaskan proportions."

"What can I do? I understand that I'll have to step in with your Muggle relations... However, I think we both can understand why it is necessary. The fact that Muggles investigated the last two incidents..." Harry's head throbbed at the thought, not longer hurting because of the liberal amount of alcohol he had earlier that day. The man across from him rubbed his eyes with frustration equally distraught over the situation.

"It's been like that since the Muggle Second World War. Isolationist stance and weak, non military trained presidents. We've never had a Dark Lord problem like you've had across the pond. We deal with radicals here and there, but it's pretty low key. We don't know how to handle when Norse Gods come to town or when something that powerful gets taken by Muggles on such a scale. Most of our government are used to how efficient and quick the Muggle side is to hush everything up. They've got a steady hand at sweeping it under the carpet." The man tried to explain, and I nodded in understanding. The British Ministry of Magic had been similar in that case; underfunded, untrained, and highly unreliable. It was mostly a miracle we'd survived the war. With Ministers like Fudge and officials like Crouch we were often left looking embarrassed. We were still repairing spots.

"I understand, the British Ministry of Magic is still reeling in places. Although there's been a severe increase in funding for our Aurors." Harry replied.

"It helps the their Savior is so hellishly determined and capable." The man said with half a grin. Harry bent his head in acknowledgment of the complement. He pulled out a small jeweled orb and Harry grinned. The man stood and Harry did as well, it was obvious that the briefing was going to be short. "Put that into your Magic-ConCom and we'll be good to go. It contains all the necessary information. I understand that the necessary teams will be transferring over in the next week or so, and that if there's any interference required on their part, or if it goes over their heads you'll come in and handle it?" Harry smiled, and it was a feral.

"Oh, of course," Harry said lifting his hood back up. "I am the youngest and most experienced Unspeakable Commander in about two hundred years, globally. You have my contact set up?"

"You'll meet General Fury in the next twenty-four hours for certain. The globe will take you to your temporary rooms, and you've been released by your government and ours to give any necessary information, Statue of Secrecy be damned." Greynolds said with a smile equally fierce.

"Excellent." Harry said. "I bid you a good morning then Secretary Greynolds."

"You too, Unspeakable Commander Phoenix." The man said formally. Harry gave a formal salute then activated the small orb by slipping it into a slim rectangular shaped piece of metal. Flashing into a hotel room looking over the Potomac Harry settled in for several hours of file reviewing. He had a meeting with some damn trigger happy Muggles soon.


Harry wasn't disappointed. He also wasn't impressed. Nick Fury was an intimidating, older black man missing an eye. It's like he's a mixture between Kings and Mad-eye, Harry thought grumpily as he set his paper to the side and took another sip of his tea. He'd been called, then ordered to meet with the Director in charge of the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division, or SHIELD, the next morning. The fact they had set it up at six didn't particularly help his mood either.

"I didn't think Greynolds would have you dropping in so..." He eyed the muscle strategically placed in multiple places throughout the small tea house and square. "Actually, I don't have a word for it."

"You're the contact?" The man growled. Harry notched an eyebrow.

"Take a seat director," he said motioning to the seat across from him. "I wish you no ill will." He said when the man merely eyed it before glaring at him.

Nick was perturbed by the British man sitting before him. Lithe and short, but in no way weak, the man's position seemed to scream battle-ready veteran, but he barely looked out of school. Early twenties at the latest he supposed. Fury sunk into the seat, watching him suspiciously.

"I was surprised to be contacted by a whole new government. One that's been in my country since it's founding." Nick said warily. Harry smirked sipping his tea.

"It is understandable." Harry said nonchalantly. He'd gotten better at the political and chess like movements that seemed to define the government.

"That may be, but I don't understand why I've been contacted." Fury said harshly. Harry sighed and set his cup down with a distinct clink. He crossed his hands on the table, and the other man subtly tensed. Harry smirked before his blank mask returned to his face.

"The Tesseract," Harry said flatly. The man's gaze sharpened dangerously.

"And how do you know about it? It's obvious you are a foreigner. It's something that most of our government doesn't even have a wit about."

"It's because your government, in the eyes of mine, are fiddling with things exceedingly dangerous to us." Harry said coldly. "Tell me Mr. Fury, what does your government understand about the source of the Tesseract and it's powers?" The man's gaze intensified.

"Explain yourself Mr...?"

"Potter," Harry said calmly, "Harry Potter, you must excuse me for lacking a proper introduction." The man's expression slide through a series of intense emotions. It finally settled on a small sampling of respect, and plenty of surprise and suspicion.

"Are you telling me that my government is concerning itself with the Savior of Britain, the Boy-Who-Lived?" Nick said surprised. He'd heard whispers of a young lad who'd defeated a terrible terrorist group five years ago. Studying the calm confidence in the man before him, Nick wasn't sure whether he believed it or whether to recruit the illusive bastard. The file on his was half a page long and he despised not having the necessary information.

"I'm saying my government, and this a frank remark, is startled, angered and worried at how yours is handling it's" Harry paused and stared into the other man's eyes seriously. "Peculiarities. Really, how you handled Mjolnir... I'm surprised the statue hasn't been broken." Nick filled away the word statue for later, the way the young man was referring to it, meant it was something big.

"Explain why your government is concerning itself with this matter," Nick said flatly. Harry sighed.

"Turn off your com," he said equally flatly. "What I say after this is classified information and will not go to some idiot who'll inform it to his gossiping wife after a bout of sex." The black man blinked a few times, studied the other man, the absolute tension he projected, and mentally cursed himself for what he was about to do.

"I can't, the whole place is bugged, but I can take you to a.. Safer place for this conversation." Nick responded. Harry drained his cup of tea with one long pull before standing. Eying the man as he moved to stand he touched his forearm briefly.

"You have some understanding of my reputation," he said softly the other man studied him carefully, his grip tightened momentarily, a clear warning, before saying, "Don't mistake it for all that I am. Or the best information." Releasing his grip he slipped out of the store and into the black car that suddenly appeared. Fury followed, his mask covering his worry and annoyance. Seeing one of his operatives on the floor and another tied up in a seat near the driver he sighed. Harry merely poured himself a glass of brandy from the car's bar. Taking a casual sip he glanced at the man with a droll expression.

"I must say Director, your little minions are quite cute." Harry mused. "The two of them thought I was an assassin. You're as paranoid as one of my old professors. If he wasn't dead I'd swear you two would make a perfect pair of nutcases." Fury merely sighed again before pinning his driver's head with a glare. The man gave a subtle shrug, there'd been nothing he could have done in the few seconds. Nick shut the door and enabled the anti-tracking and secrecy devices with a subtle twist of his hand. The doors locked and the British man eyed the machinery with a lack of care that belied confidence not missing skill.

"Drive," Nick growled. Making sure all of the agents were truly knocked out and not responding, and that the privacy window was up between the passengers and driver, he glanced at the slender young man sipping a hundred year old brandy as if it was water. "Explain." Harry smiled and he did. Two hours later Fury was plotting how to convince his government into letting the Magical branch work with his military and whether or not it was possible to enlist this young man into one of his older projects.

"And that's the general outline," Harry said with a sigh. The two hours had been spent explaing the outline factors of the Wizarding world, what the Deatheaters were, why he was there, the basic concerns his and their government had, as well as what the Statue of Secrecy was. He'd even had to change one of the agents (who was still passed out) into a pig, before the man took it as truth. He'd then had to explain his position and a little of his professional duties.

"So you're a commander of a special division responsible for understanding and fighting obscure sources of danger. As well as, preventing non-magical, non-politically needed members of the world from discovering you." Fury said and Harry nodded. "And the terrorist you faced down was a power hungry wizard who dabbled in dangerous areas of your magic and lead his followers into an attempted genocide of multiple people in your society and the non-magical people of the world." Harry nodded again. "How long ago was this?"

"Five years since it ended, though it's been going on since the late sixties early seventies. There was a brief lag in the nineties when the man was incapacitated. I was able to defeat him after a long year of chasing down multiple problems that impeded his death. I've spent the past five cleaning up and trying to organize our rather shaken government."

"Cleaning up? As in it's not over?" Nick asked.

"I was informed after a two month vacation that they decided to get new helpers and transplant." Harry said grimly. Nick realized exactly where the transplant was if Harry was in the United States, although perhaps the Tesseract would have caused him to be here as well.

"So you're here to... Weed them out?" Nick asked gravely. Harry nodded.

"I hope you don't mind some of your mafia going missing. My teams are better but they aren't always very controlled." He said glibly.

"Will you be needing help?" Nick hoped to get some operatives from this or perhaps more information. Harry shook his head.

"Your people would be endangered, so no. Leave this to me and my men. I have a close friend, I don't doubt, that will be coming over to handle it and work in sync with me. He'll keep them straight, they and he know better than to screw around like they've been doing for the past year. Sending fourth grades right out of trainee school... Incompetents." Harry said with a sneer. Nick suppressed the urge to do the same. They discussed the Deatheater problem for a bit longer before Harry asked about how soon they'd be seeing the Tesseract.

"We'll be headed to the base containing the specimen soon, there we'll be meeting one of my operatives. Your baggage is already being secured." Nick said.

"No need for that. I have it, anything left that they try to remove from the room will cause unpleasant consequences, so tell them to leave it alone." Harry told him calmly. "I can always pop back and get anything I need at a later date if I need it, it's mostly clothes." Harry had learned to leave little behind, there's was only a few potion supplies (all legal and would only cause some confusion. The more illegal and dangerous ones were on his person in a bag with a infinite expandable charm with the rest of his stuff) and a few extra pairs of pants and shirts.

"If you say so," Nick said eying him. Harry was dressed in a tan leather trench coat over a dark green sweater, black slacks and patent leather shoes. Smiling mysteriously and with a hint of humor the other man didn't elaborate which annoyed Nick, but he properly guessed that it involved magic, something he could try and pry out of Potter later. Within ten hours they were driving to a secret research facility labeled Project P.E.G.A.S.U.S. Stepping into a white walled hallway the duo were instantly greeted by a rather frantic young woman with short black hair and a headset.

"Director!" She exclaimed. The note of relief on her face was disconcerting. Nick quickly barked orders as they stopped in a wide area with low seating.

"Status report Agent Hill, I'm not liking the fact I walked into emergency alarms and lock down procedures." Harry stood silently by his clasped loosely around the handle of a serrated knife.

"Sir," she bare glanced at the well dressed man next to her director though she noted his position and stance automatically. "The Tesseract suddenly activated and a strange man calling himself Loki stepped out and stole it while kidnapping a number of civilians. It appeared that he had some sort of scepter and was using it to control the minds of multiple operatives in his burglary and then immediate escape. Of those left behind, many are currently comatose and unresponsive. One, I am afraid to say, is Agent Barton." Nick felt a twitch start in his remaining eye. Harry hissed out a long annoyed breath.

"I'm going to have to notify people Fury," Harry said quietly. The black man's eye cut to him and gave a look. Harry guessed it perfectly. "We'll have a better chance of tracking it if my guesses are correct. Using both our sources in combination with yours may tip the scales. Our researchers are better at this type of thing after all. Anything I do will have to fly low, but anything you do I can help in."

"Do it," Nick said annoyed with the reasoning. His gaze cut to Hill. She flinched a bit. "Get me Agent Romanoff, we're starting up the Avengers Initiative." She saluted and was dismissed. Rubbing his eye tiredly he glanced at the back of the young man a few feet away talking lowly into a strange piece of metal. Harry glanced back at him and the pair exchanged a look, things had just gone from fucked to pear shaped.


A/N: AHAHAHAHA... I read to much of this crossover, so I wanted to try it out. Consider Harry for now... As an Honorary Member, consultant, or whatever. I'm not sure if this'll be slash, so suggestions are wanted. Also, uhm... Review anyway? I need the feed back to make this even better. It's an experiment until some says the hate it. I feel pretty nervous about it actually. I can see this blowing up in my face. .