A/N: To any of you that are reading my other stories, I know you must hate me right now for not updating. But I'm trying. Writer's block has got me for those stories, but I think I'm overcoming it with this. I just HAD to write this; I couldn't get it out of my head.
Anyways, I hope you all enjoy. This story was inspired by the song Fast Car by Tracy Chapman. I suggest all of you listen to it at least once. And if you like it, then put that sucker on repeat; it'll make this story a lot better. :)
And if you do like it, please leave a review telling me so and if I should continue or not. :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, nor do I own the song that inspired this fic.
P.s. I didn't re-read it, so please ignore any mistakes. Plus, it's almost 2am where I am, so give me some credit, haha. I'll fix it later, if needed.
"You see my old man's got a problem,
He lives with the bottle that's the way it is,
He says his body's too old for working,
I say his body's too young to look like his,
My mama went off and left him,
She wanted more from life than he could give,
I said somebody's got to take care of him,
So I quit school and that's what I did."
Casting a glance behind me to my bedroom door, I clutched the wrinkled up bills in my hand. Before I could finish counting, my dad's rough voice boomed through the house, and I huffed when I lost track.
"Yeah dad?" I called back, trying my hardest to hide the annoyance in my voice. I quickly wrapped an elastic band around the pile of bills before tucking it back into the tin box and pushing it back under my bed. When I realized my dad hadn't answered, I rolled my eyes and got up from the floor.
"Yes?" I asked once I reached the living room.
He looked up at me from his place on the couch, taking his glassy eyed off of the TV long enough to say, "We need more groceries," He then turned back to the TV and brought the bottle of whiskey he had in his hand up to his lips, taking a swing.
"Why can't you go get them?" I asked stubbornly.
He looked at me, "Because I asked you to."
"Dad, it's nearly 11 o'clock. The stores going to be closing soon," I replied.
He took another swig from the bottle, "Well I guess you better hurry up then."
Closing my eyes to keep my temper in tact, I pulled out my phone and swiftly walked into the kitchen as I dialled the number to the only person I knew who would be willing to give me a ride at this hour.
"Hey, look I know it's late but I was wondering if you could do me a favour?" I asked as I looked at the fridge for the grocery list. Of course the only thing written on it was beer in my dad's sloppy writing.
"Is this a booty call?"
I paused for a moment as my face twisted into a goofy smile, despite the circumstances. I let out a small laugh, "No… I need a ride to the grocery store."
"A public place? You little devil."
"Eli! I'm serious," I said as I looked through the fridge and cupboards, figuring out what to put on the list.
He laughed, "Okay, okay, I'm done. I'll be there in ten."
"Thank you," I said before we hung up.
Driving to the store took a lot longer than I would have liked it to. Although, watching Eli from the passenger seat as the wind swept through his dark, silky hair made it worth it. The way he let his left hand rest against the windowsill as his right was placed on the steering wheel made me smile. He looked so carefree, and I loved these kinds of moments, because they meant that he was him. It meant he didn't have a million thoughts running through his head and making him aggravated and restless. It meant he was having a good day, and I loved those day's.
Even though he has days when he's down and not in his rightful mind, I'm always there by his side. And everyday I make sure he knows this. Because the worst possible feeling is feeling like you're alone, and he doesn't need that added to his plate.
When Eli cast a glance my way, his eyebrows were drawn together as he asked, "What?"
I smiled at him. He looked back out the windshield, a confused expression still taking over his beautiful features. He cast another glance my way, obviously wanting an answer, and I said, "I love you."
Eli's face brightened as his lips curled up into a grin. He switched hands and placed his left on the steering wheel while his right reached out towards me. I slid over to the middle and let him take my hand in his. We pulled into the store's parking lot and he swiftly parked before turning to look at me. "I love you, too."
It was my turn to grin as he lifted my hand up to his lips and kissed it softly. We finally got out of the car and made our way inside the store.
"This is going to take forever," I huffed as I looked through the list. Eli looked over my shoulder and at the list. I watched his lips curve as he took the list from me and ripped it in half, splitting the items. He handed me half of the list as he kept the other.
"Let's race. The first one to finish getting all of the items on their list gets to make a demand, and no matter what it is the other has to comply. Deal?" Eli asked with a raised eyebrow.
I giggled, "Deal."
He grinned and, before I could say more, ran off to get the items on his half of the list. I shook my head at how childish he could be, but quickly began to get the items on my half.
I had one last item on my list, which was milk, and as I was making my way over to the cold section I noticed Eli at the other end of the store. He grinned at me and made it quite clear that he had finished by the victory dance he began to do. I pouted at him and stuck out my bottom lip, and he stopped dancing and mimicked me. I grinned wide and he did the same, making me laugh. I turned to grab the milk and made my way over to him, though he met me half way.
As we made our way to the checkout, I asked, "So, what is your demand?"
He smirked at me with a wicked look in his eyes, and I suddenly regretted agreeing to his little game. "You'll find out soon enough."
As we stood in line, I frowned at him and gave him the puppy dog eyes. Eli rolled his eyes before placing his hand on my face and pushing me away slightly. I laughed as I pushed his hand away before I realized it was our turn. The lady scanned through our items, and as I reached into my pocket to grab the money to pay, I turned back and saw that Eli was already handing the lady the amount that was due. I watched curiously as he grabbed the bags and thanked the lady before making his way out of the store, me following in suit.
"You didn't have to do that," I said as I caught up to him. We made it to Morty and he threw the bags in the back.
"I know," he answered.
I held out my hand to him, trying to give him the money that was supposed to have paid for the groceries. "Eli, these groceries are for my dad. You really didn't have to do that. Please, take this-"
"Clare stop," he cut me off as he stood back up and closed the back doors. "I don't get to buy you nice things because you insist that it's a stupid way to show my love for you, but I want to do something, even if it means buying your dad's groceries." Eli explained, but I kept my hand held out. He stepped closer to me and placed his hand over mine. "Clare, I know you're trying to save up money so keep this. You're dad will never know."
He pushed my hand back towards me and placed a kiss on my forehead before walking to the driver's side. I stayed where I was for a minute and let out a deep breath as I placed the money in my pocket before making my way back to the passenger side and climbing inside the car.
The ride was quiet. I wanted to speak up and tell him I wasn't mad, because the look on his face told me that he thought otherwise, but I couldn't find my voice. Honestly, I didn't know what to say. But when we pulled up to my place and just sat there, I realized how I could start a conversation.
"So, are you going to tell me your demand?" I asked softly and looked over at him.
He looked at me and smirked shyly. "Can I get a kiss?"
"That's not much of a demand," I teased.
He raised his eyebrows, "Fine. Give me a kiss."
I cracked a grin before I unbuckled myself and slid over to him. Placing my hand on his cheek, I smiled at him before pulling his face to mine and placing my lips over his. It was soft and gentle. His hand reached up to cup my neck as he kissed me slowly. Eli pulled away and smirked at me, and I knew he thought that was it when he pulled himself from my grasp and looked out the windshield. He was never one to push our intimate moments; he respected me too much. A lot of the time it was nice, but there are moments when I wish he would just man up and take control every once and a while or push just a little bit, just to see how far I would. But I knew he would never push.
But that didn't mean I wouldn't.
I grabbed his chin in my hand firmly before turning his head to me, pressing my lips to his once again. I could tell he was surprised by my action, but fortunately, he kissed me back. Wanting to take it up a notch, I kissed him harder and moved so I was facing him, my legs finding their way around his waist. He moved his body to align it with mine, and slowly laid me down on the seat. I grinned and pried his lips open with my own, letting my tongue find his. My hands gripped his jacket to pull him closer as his hands roamed my waist, but it wasn't enough for me.
Pulling away, I rushed to say, "Take off your jacket."
He paused for a moment and tilted his head, "What?"
"Your jacket, take it off," I repeated.
"Clare, we're in your driveway…"
"I don't care, Eli. Take off the goddamn jacket!"
He raised his eyebrows and smirked, "So this is a booty call?"
I grinned and placed my hands on either sides of his face, pulling him back down to me, "Shut up and kiss me."
Following my demand, I helped him shake off his jacket, pushing it to the floor of the hearse. I kissed him hungrily, my hands roaming through his hair, and moaned softly; he tasted like Coca Cola. Trailing one of my hands south, I finally reached the edge of his t-shirt and slid my hand beneath the fabric and touched his warm skin. This wasn't new to either off us; we had plenty of make-out sessions much like this one, but most of them took place at his place, either on his bed or couch. Never had it occurred in his car, and it made me wonder why. The feeling of being cramped in the front seat and being forced to hold each other close like this made me want to have every moment like this one spent in here. And hearing Eli groan softly as I pulled him closer to me while biting his bottom lip had me wishing that I didn't have to return to the place I call home.
Removing his lips from mine, Eli placed his right hand on my waist and his other on the back of my thigh as his lips made their way to my neck. My breathing was ragged and uneven as my eyelid fluttered shut, my body embracing the way Eli was making me feel. His lips sucked softly on my flesh as his hand trailed up my thigh and closer to my bottom, but I paid no attention. My hands were too busy palming his back. And when his teeth nibbled on the skin of my neck, my fingernails glided down his back as I arched into him. And suddenly, I felt his hand grab my ass, and I let out a shocked gasp. Eli retracted from me, removing himself completely as he sprang up into a sitting position.
"Shit, I'm sorry. I'm such an idiot. I'm so, so sorry, Clare. I should've stopped. I-"
"Stop, stop," I cut him off from his rambling as I sat up also, placing my finger on his plump lips. "Don't be sorry."
His face twisted in confusion slightly, though he kept quiet. We sat in silence as we tried to catch our breathing, and he avoided eye contact with me.
"I've thought about it, you know," I said softly, hoping he would look at me. He did.
His eyes held curiosity and he tilted his held slightly as he asked, "About what?"
"Sex," I replied, watching his eyes widen. "With you."
He closed his eyes. "I told you I'm okay with waiting," he said softly as he moved to rest his back against the driver side door.
"Yeah well, I think we've waited long enough," I said as I moved so I was sitting in his lap, my legs on either side of his waist.
Eli opened his eyes and peered at me, shock evident on his face. "Here and now?"
A laughed ripped through my throat as I noticed the bewilderment look on his face. I shook my head, "No, of course not. It may not even be tomorrow or the next day or the day after that, but I'm just letting you know that I am ready."
For a moment he sat there with a blank expression on his face, and I chewed my bottom lip, wondering if he even wanted to have sex with me. I sat back slightly, pulling away from him. Maybe he didn't want to.
But suddenly, his lips perked up and he grinned at me, pulling me to him. He wrapped his arms around me and held me to him, placing millions of kisses all over my face. I giggled and pushed at his chest, trying to pull away from him. H finally stopped and just held me to him as I rested my head against his chest.
"I'd hate to ruin this wonderful moment," Eli spoke up. "But if you don't go inside now, you're dad might rip me to pieces."
I looked at the time on my phone and cursed. I quickly got up and fixed myself before grabbing all of my things and opening the door. Before I stepped out, Eli grabbed my arm and whispered in my ear, "Send me nudes."
I scoffed and punched him in the arm, "You're such a pig."
He laughed as he watched me get out. Grabbing all of the groceries, I finally made my way to the front door.
"I'm serious!" Eli yelled out from behind me. I turned around and gave him the finger, earning a goofy grin from him in return. "Awh, I love you, too, baby."
A week later
Sighing to myself, I made my way around the room with a garbage bag as I picked up the scattered beer cans and the empty vodka bottles. Daddy dearest was passed out on the couch, as usual, and I decided I had had enough of this. I was tired of cleaning up after him. I was tired of watching him drink away his sorrows. I was tired of taking care of him. I was emotionally drained. I was exhausted.
He was the reason that I had left school. I couldn't just let him drink himself to death. Someone had to take care of him, and I was that someone. I had tried to finish school online, but that didn't work. Eli even tried helping me; he'd bring over his text books and we had a few study dates, but between work and taking care of my dad, there was barely any time for it. So eventually, I gave up.
But looking at the mess I call my father I realized that it was a mistake.
And so, I walked into the kitchen and opened his liquor cabinet. I began to pull out every last bottle and dump out every last drop into the sink, watching it circle the drain before entering the pipe. After that was done, I made my way to the fridge and grabbed all of the beer cans before I did what I had done with the rest of the poison.
And when my dad had woken up, I was sitting at the kitchen table eating a bowl of soup. I had poured him a bowl, but he didn't even look at it. Instead, he made his way over to the fridge. I took a spoonful of the soup as I watched him with a blank face. I flinched when he slammed the fridge door shut after rummaging through it, after realizing his precious alcohol was gone.
"Where's my beer, Clare?" He asked firmly.
I shrugged and he glared at me. He turned to look at his cabinet and his eyes widened. He stormed over to it and opened the doors forcefully. Noticing every bottle was gone, he slammed the doors shut and I cringed when the doors popped back open from the force. He spun around and I placed my spoon down when I noticed his face was red.
"Where the fuck is everything?" He screamed.
I placed my elbows on the table before I pointed towards the sink, giving him a little smirk.
He looked at the sink in horror before looking back at me. He walked over and slammed his fists down on the table. "Who the hell do you think you are?"
"I'm your daughter. You know, the girl who has been putting up with your shit for the past three years? Yeah, that's me. And I'm sick and tired of having to pick up after you. I'm done. And so are you."
Suddenly, his hands gripped the edge of the table and he flipped it, and I ducked. I looked at the table that now lay on its side with shock. Turning to look at him again, I stood up from the chair. "You need help."
And the unexpected happened. There was a loud sound that echoed through the house as a stinging pain shot through my cheek, my head being forced to the side.
"No. what I need is a goddamn drink!" he yelled.
I looked up at him with shock, my hand coming up to touch my cheek. I knew I would sart crying soon, but I was too shocked to start now. "Get help. I only stuck with you because I didn't want you to become this," I waved my hand in a gesture that told him I meant the mess he already was, "but that obviously didn't work. You're too stubborn to realize that you're drinking your life away. But I don't have the power to be your saviour, dad. I'm done."
I swiftly made my way upstairs and pulled out my suitcase form under my bed. I started throwing everything that I needed into it, most of my clothing, my bathroom necessities, a few personal belongings and, last but not least, the money that I had been saving since I had quit school. I zipped it up and stormed downstairs and to the front door. Just as I reached the door, my dad spoke up.
"If you leave, don't ever come back," he said firmly.
I grinded my teeth, "Don't worry, I won't." I was done with his shit and I didn't plan on sticking around anymore to watch him go even deeper than he already was. "No wonder mom left you."
And with that, I stormed out of the house and slammed the door behind me.
I stood on the front step and pulled out my phone. I quickly dialled Eli's number and waited impatiently for him to pick up.
"Is this another booty call, because you know Sunday's are family dinner nights," I could hear the smirk in his voice and I frowned, feeling bad. I had forgotten that tonight he would be at his parents' place.
But I opened my mouth and breathed shakily, "I need you."
Before I knew it, I saw Morty pull up into the driveway and I quickly grabbed my suitcase before I made my way over to him. I watched Eli jump out of the hearse and walk over to me, but I brushed passed him and threw my bag into the back, ignoring his questions. I climbed into the passenger side and waited for him to get in also. Once he did, he looked at me and asked what had happened. I ignored him and started straight ahead.
And so he did.