August 18, 2012 – All or Nothing Day

Summary: **Part of the 2012 LiveJournal's Twisted Shorts August Fic-A-Day** series, also known as the 'Wacky Holiday Series'. A lot is riding on Buffy's ability to shoe shop.

Challenge: for the livejournal 2012 August Fic-a-Day Challenge.

Warning: nothing serious.

Timeline: post-series for BtVS; vague for MWC, but change the dates so they line up.

A/N: I figured between the fanon obsession Buffy has with shoes (I don't think it was quite obsession level on the show) and the fact Al's a shoe salesman, the fic had to involve the store.

Disclaimer: BtVS/AtS characters belong to Joss Whedon/Mutant Enemy. Married With Children characters belong to Michael G. Moye, Ron Leavitt, ELP Communications, Columbia Pictures Television and Sony Pictures Television. I claim no rights to any copyrighted material. Please do not copy or take this story without my permission.

New Market Mall, Chicago suburb

July 26th

Faith watched as Buffy tore through store after store and was beginning to regret the bet she made with her sister Chosen 'One'. This could end up costing her a month's pay if B succeeded. When Buffy had mentioned being a kickass shopper, Faith made the mistake of betting her that she couldn't buy an item – that she wanted – from each store in the mall in under four hours…including each of the food court shops.

If B won, Faith was to pay for the shopping trip. On the other hand, in honor of 'All or Nothing Day', if she didn't make it, she not only had to return every non-food item, but she also had to submit to a night of fun with Faith…wearing whatever outfit Faith picked out. What B didn't know was that Faith had no intention of spending the night in Chicago for the bet; she had a cool club in Las Vegas in mind for making it a night to remember…if they didn't forget due to alcohol.

The outfits she had in mind for them to wear were straight out of that wacky vampire hunter series where the main character ends up sleeping with practically everyone. Xander's hand was still healing from B's reaction to him suggesting she had a lot in common with the hunter chick. And he wasn't getting a ton of sympathy from anyone else for the snide comment.

But back to the impeding hit on her wallet…

It was only a fifteen minutes to go in the bet and B only had one store to go… Gary's Shoes and Accessories for Today's Woman. And while Faith had seen B shop for shoes for four hours more than once, she didn't hold out too much hope that her blonde counterpart would forget about the bet and get lost in the aisles of shoes.

Well, no reason to stand there and watch all that money flow out of her wallet. She gestured to B that she'd be waiting in the arcade. Maybe shooting some zombies would make her feel better about not getting to drag B to Vegas for some fun.

Hours later…

Faith became so involved in playing the video games that she didn't notice when Buffy didn't show up right away.

She did, however, notice Buffy's extremely foul mood when she finally stomped into the arcade five hours later.

"Whoa, B! What happened? I thought you had the bet won?" Faith remarked cautiously. "Where are all your bags?"

Buffy positively growled, scaring most of the geeks who were drooling over the two hot chicks out of the arcade…as well as turning them on even more. "That stupid shoe salesman! I even had the exact shoes I was going to buy to win! In the right size and color, too! All he had to do was ring the damn things up!"

All Faith could do was repeat, "What happened?"

"He got into some fight with a woman who actually looked like a chicken clucking," Buffy snarled in disgust. "I mean, seriously was doing the head motions and everything. Is there a chicken demon that looks human or something?" she asked, drifting from her anger into a confused tangent for a moment.

Unable to stop herself, Faith chuckled. "I don't think, B. It would make for an interesting read in a Watcher's Diary, though…don't ya think?"

Buffy rolled her eyes and smiled a little, too. "Can you imagine Giles' face if Andrew or Xander sent in a report like that? Maybe that could explain his clucking sound he does every once in a while." Sighing, she finished her explanation, "So she and the shoe guy were going back and forth about something called 'No Ma'am'; she was claiming it was male chauvinism at its worst and he said something about reclaiming balls from women like her. If it weren't for the fact they made me lose the bet, it might have been funny to watch," she admitted.

With the reminder of the bet, Faith started to leer. "Don't worry, B…we'll have a good time in Vegas…I promise."

"Wait! Vegas?!"

A/N: I wasn't convinced I could pull off Marcy and Al's voices directly so I settled for having that action occur off-screen.