After I talked to Sam I felt a little better. I was trying to be vague about everything I was saying to him. I still have to figure out what I'm gonna tell the Council still. Too much information gets them in trouble and not enough still leaves me as an outsider from the pack. He gave me encouragement and said he would be there for me. I didn't tell him about the surprise visit I got from the leech either.

That's still something that I haven't talked to Bella about that either, her knowing about them, their secret and what they really are. I'm almost sure she does and that's more that I can't understand about her. Dealing with Edward will come but I've gotta get back to where I once was. I don't want the pack to have to protect Bella and me too. Being honest with myself has been easier since everything happened and I want to change my life. I've gotta keep Edward from Bella and Solomon away from her too.

Protecting Bella is the only reason for my caving in to the Council demands. Maybe if she would have come along earlier in my life things would have been different but I doubt it. All the money in the world wouldn't fix my problems right now. Wanting wealth is what started my downward spiral to hell.

Paul made it clear to me he has feelings for her but I don't know if she feels the same way about him too. If they hooked up he wouldn't want me to be anywhere near her. That much I already know. Being honest with my feelings is something new for me too. I don't think it's jealousy of Paul but hell I'm not sure about that either. I don't wanna lose my friend that much I know. Really the only true friend I have.

I didn't even think about Bella like that until I kissed her. It was just a reaction to her pissing me off. She scared the shit out of me for no good reason. Tricking me with fear into doing what she wanted. But I felt so much heated passion from that kiss. More than I have when fucking all the skanks Solomon gave me. Really I need to figure out if it means anything more than just a kiss though. But I have so much shit going on right now. Maybe after I get out of here I can talk to her about it. See how she feels.

Bella annoys me by always having to make a point to me, makes it impossible for me to get away with anything. She never knows when to stop and makes me smile at the same time. What a combo for a little crazy chick. That's what fucks me up the most. Trying to figure out what she wants from me in return for doing all of this. Because so far she hasn't asked me for a damn thing and I'm waiting I guess to find out that she was doing it for something to gain. That's what I know and what I'm used to. All the women I know only want one thing from me, money. But it was so sweet that she didn't even want me to buy her ice cream cone. So maybe she's different.

Dad and Sue came to the hospital to see me. I casual mentioned to them that Bella hadn't been here yet today and I was sure that she would come to see me. They ignored what I said and kept on talking. Maybe she came to her senses about not being around me anymore. I can't say that if she caused me so many problems that I would have fought so hard for her but I would like to think so.

Sue excused herself from the room so I know whatever he wanted to tell me probably wasn't a good thing "Bella and Charlie went to court for you and you were cleared of the destruction charges. However you're going to have to catch up on all of your school work. Bella lied to the judge and told him there was a misunderstanding and you've been doing all the requirements. But she wants you to know that if you don't make up the work she said she will tell the judge that you needed to be locked up again. There are other things that you have to do but I'll let Bella tell you about that herself." I was thrilled Charlie and especially Bella went out of there way for me again. Not having to go to jail was a pleasant surprise and at least I'll be around to keep an eye on her. It lets me breathe a little easier too. But this is why she screws with my head so much. I'll keep you out of jail Jacob but I'll send you right back there if you do something that I don't like, damn woman.

It's so hard for him to get in and out of his wheelchair so he held out his hand for mine. This was his way of giving me a hug and he does it a lot. Or I should say he used to. When I took his hand he grabbed it and pulled my arm closer to him "Where in the hell did you get this?" He was looking at my bracelet.

There was no honest answer I could give him. If I say I dreamed about it and it mysteriously appeared he'll think I'm crazy or on drugs too. I can't say that I bought it because he wouldn't believe that probably. So I said what came to my mind "I found it."

He ran his fingers over the beads "It's impossible." I don't know why it was such a big deal. It's just a strap of leather with some beads on it. Although they are different from the ones I've ever seen before. My favorite is the black one, it almost looks marble. It's kind of cool.

After they left I had dinner and was getting tired. The food is so bland here but I was hungry today so I ate it all. I could never get them to tell me why Bella didn't come to see me today. So I decided I would call her house before I fell asleep and he answered the phone "She's asleep." My question was answered with that she's with Paul. I seriously doubt that he will tell her I called so I guess I'll try again tomorrow. It kinda upset me that it's getting late and he's still with her but I was relieved at the same time that he's there.

Coming upon a teepee I knew I was dreaming again "Why do I keep coming here? Will you please tell me who you are and what do you want from me?"

"You have been sent to me by someone that loves you. You're coming here is through your own conscience wanting my help. Not everyone wants something from you. When it's time I'll tell you my name." I think he's wrong I don't want his help. He is making me doubt my own sanity a little though.

He smiled when he saw I had his bracelet on "You're wearing what I left you. I was there in your room at the hospital. I was there when those men beat you until you passed out from the pain. I was there the first time you made the first bad mistake of your life." I've made so many mistakes he was going to have to be a little more specific than that.

This was starting to get old "Look I appreciate all the shit you think you're doing for me but I don't need it. So I won't be coming back again because you just said it was my choice right? I keep sending myself back here."

"Are you trying to convince me or yourself of that? If you didn't need me you would never be able to see me. You know you're very cocky for someone that turned into such a fuck up." This guy makes no sense with everything he says. It's like there is a hidden message and I'm supposed to figure it out or something. He wouldn't exactly be rated high on the list of kind and gentle words either.

"What is the one thing you decide to focus on and believe in? I told you the last time I saw you I wanted to know." I really hadn't given that much thought and told him I hadn't decided yet.

"This isn't going to work Jacob unless you really try. You made the decision to do what the Council wants and needs you to do." Well yeah I had done that but I didn't know that's what he meant. Besides if he already knew why did he ask me?

He waited for me to say something but since I didn't he continued on "The girl. You chose to focus and believe in the girl. Damn why are you make this so difficult? Oh and I was there when you kissed her too."

Was it really only because of Bella that I made that decision? After thinking about it, it was all about her "How do you know so much about the things I do and think? You keep telling me that you were there but I've never seen you before."

"I'm in your head and your heart. There is no way that you can get away from me or keep things from me even if you wanted to. But never under estimate the power that comes with the love of a woman." I've heard someone else say that to me before too but I can't remember who it was. I went to say something but he was already gone. He might be trying to help me but he always disappears when I want to know something.


Sitting at the table with the idiots is what Solomon was thinking. Not being able to wrap his head around why it's so difficult for them to take out Jacob Black and one bitch "So am I correct when I say that you were beat up, you don't remember any of it and the girl did this shit to your face?"

They patched up his face the best they could. It wasn't like he could waltz into a hospital without explaining what had happened. Their stitches they did weren't the best in the world and he was lucky a couple of teeth were all he was going to lose. If the drill had gone through his cheek bone they couldn't have handled taking care of that.

Preacher set before Solomon with his head bowed low in shame that he had not completed the task he was given to do. He really couldn't use his mouth but shook his head yes to the question he was asked.

Solomon was never one to tolerate weakness or insubbornation in his organization "Get this stupid piece of shit out of my sight before I put a bullet in him for getting his ass kicked by a bitch. Jacob is still alive and so is the girl." Two of them got Preacher out of there because they have seen Solomon kill within their own group for doing a lot less than what he did.

Jeremy was laughing at Preacher but Solomon had several issues to address at this meeting "What the fuck are you laughing at? Black came in to my place of business and completely destroyed it on your watch. Not to mention that he stabbed Digger with his own knife. What kind of pussy gets stabbed by his own knife?" Jeremy's face went serious and quick because he had failed Solomon too. They took Digger to the hospital and made up the story that a car had fallen on his hand while he was working on it. That's why it was crushed. The stab wound in his leg was from a tool they said although they weren't sure if the doctor on duty believed that one or not.

Solomon got up from his chair and went over to Jeremy "Do you know who personally paid me a visit? Let me tell you who did. Chief of Police Charles Swan the father of Isabella Swan and he was asking me all kinds of questions about one Jacob Black. I was completely taken off guard that a cop showed up at my home. The cop has seen my face and knows my name. He can link us back to Jacob you fucking idiots." One more time Jacob and Bella are causing problems for his organization.

Solomon had to make an example out of someone and his anger was pointed towards Jeremy right now "Give me your knife and put your hand on the table."

Jeremy did as he was told but was fearing the consequences that he was about to face but knew if he didn't he was dead. Solomon picked up the knife. He stabbed it into Jeremy's hand and shoved the knife down through the table "Let this be a lesson to you all. I will not accept any more failures from you when I give an order."

Solomon took his gun out of his holster and pointed it at Jeremy's head then pulled the trigger "You're fired."

Solomon pushed Jeremy's dead lifeless body out of the chair and it fell with a thud to the floor then he sat down "All of you disgust me get out of my sight."

They all scurried out of the room except Dan. He is now Solomon's new right hand man "Do you want me to leave too Boss?"

Solomon asked him to shut the door and set down "Since we can't seem to get Jacob away from the girl. Let's get the girl to leave him. Once she breaks him down we'll be there and offer him to come back with open arms. Then we'll kill him and finish this shit."

Dan was getting the details of Solomons plan "We still have the gun that Jacob use to carry when he made deliveries for us. It still has his finger prints all over it. After we know Jacob is out of the hospital we kill the cop. We'll frame Jacob for his murder. How do you think she'll feel about him knowing he shot her daddy? After she dumps him and breaks him down we'll be there to take him in. After we find out what he said about us then we'll put an end to this."

Solomon took in a deep breath trying to calm himself down "I almost think it would have been easier if we had put the girl on the payroll too."

Their meeting was interrupted "Hey Boss there's a guy out here that wants to talk to you about Jacob. He's not a cop. He's a young punk."

They escorted the young man in to speak with Solomon but all eyes were on him to protect their leader from any harm "I believe you and I have a common enemy, Jacob Black. I'm here to help with your little problem. I have some very useful information for you."

Solomon looked at this boy standing before him "Sit down and let's talk."


Paul wasn't going to drop the question he asked; do you have feelings for Jacob? I didn't know how to answer the question. I know I care about him so I tried to be honest as I could with him and myself "I really like Jacob and there is just something about him that I can't explain. But when Jacob kissed me I've never been kissed like that before." Paul was quiet after that and kind of distant from me. It wasn't like I wanted to hurt his feelings but he wanted to know how I felt. I need to safe guard Jacob for a while too and not let Edward know that I even care about him.

Edward would just assume that is the reason that I have been spending so much time with Jacob but it's not. He accused me of being in love with Jacob so many times. He kind of acts crazy and with him being a vampire he could hurt or kill Jacob if he wanted to. Jacob has been hurt enough by so many people and I will not let that happen.

Most of the swelling was gone from my face this morning when I woke up. I just look really bad. It's turning purple now. I showered and got ready to start my day. I'm not going back to school for a few days so I don't have to explain to everyone what happened or to the one person I want to avoid, Edward. He knows I was in the hospital from the text messages that he left. But how much he knows about what happened I'm not sure. His texts started out being of concern and wanting to be there for me but when I texted him that I didn't want him to come to the hospital they became threating. Not just to me but Jacob too. I didn't say anything to anyone. I mean really how much can I say about Edward without giving away his secret?

Paul refused to leave me alone even after we talked about Jacob. Charlie was all for Paul staying with us but he needs to go home to do somethings and I'm staying at his house for a few days. Charlie was all for that too because he worries so much about them coming back to the house while he's at work. It's not like Paul and I am a couple or anything so I think that's part of the reason too that Charlie wasn't too concerned.

Everything was ready to go setting by the front door when Paul got out of the shower. I passed him in the hallway. He was only wrapped in a towel going down stairs to get his clean clothes. I couldn't help but to notice what a nice body he has. I mean I am only human after all. Every time where together it has usually been because of something bad going on. He must have seen me ogling a little too long and he had a smirk on his face as he passed by. But he never said anything.

We went by the hospital to see Jacob before going back to the reservation. He seemed to be moving better today "I was starting to think you weren't gonna come back to see me."

Jacob is so adorable when he drops his bad boy act and lets you in. When I see his vulnerable side I just want to hug him but when he's being an ass, I want to go get that baseball bat again. They are releasing him tomorrow and he's staring drug rehab which surprised me since he said he never did them "I'm making a step to go straight and be able to go home with my head held high again. Show the people I love that I do give a shit." Almost word for word what I said to him setting outside his jail cell. No matter how bad things have been over the last few days I know in my heart that I did the right thing.

Not having much time before Paul's meetings I had to cut our visit short "I'll be here tomorrow to pick you up. I'm staying on the reservation so I'll be around."

He didn't want me to go I could tell but Paul was downstairs waiting on me "Where are you staying at?"

I told him Pauls house and gave him a kiss on the cheek before I even realized what I had done "I'll see you tomorrow." Damn I wish I knew what it was about him.

Paul's house was small but homey for a guy living on his own. I figured while he's gone doing whatever that I would do some cleaning and cook his dinner. I think that's the least I can do for him considering everything he's done for me. But he didn't have much food in the refrigerator. When he was getting ready to leave "I'll be gone for a few hours so make yourself at home. Billy and Sue are around if you need anything."

Starting in the kitchen with my cleaning madness; I did the dishes, swept the floor and clean off his table. Then I headed for the bathroom. Cleaned the sink and the toilet and was searching for his vacuum cleaner. I passed his bedroom and the door was open. There was a huge pile of dirty laundry in the corner. I gathered it all up and started washing his clothes.

I have always had a habit of searching pockets when I do laundry. I wasn't trying to be nosey but found a lot of things in his pockets; money, girls phone numbers, condoms and folded up piece of paper. I didn't want to invade his privacy so I didn't read it. I put all that stuff on his dresser and made his bed for him.

With each load I took out of the dryer I folded it and put it away too. I had killed five hours before I even realized and he was already home "Holy shit if you're going to keep doing this you can move in with me." I took that as a joke of course. Because I think Paul sees a lot of girls and isn't the type to have a serious relationship with anybody.

When I started dinner he came in to help but I didn't need any "Thanks for doing all of this. I don't have someone that runs after me to make sure that I'm taken care of. So I don't really know how to show you that I do appreciate it. Sorry for the shit in my pockets too. Not really use to having anybody around me much. I have been on my own for a long time now. Did you read my letter when you did my laundry?" That last question took me off guard.

He must think I was going through his stuff while he was gone but I was only trying to help "No I didn't read it and I put your stuff on your dresser. I am sorry that I didn't ask you first if it was okay."

He smiled at me "It would be easier if you had read it. Then you would know how I feel about you. I wrote it when we were at the hospital while I watched you sleep. I'm not good at this touchy feely shit. You probably think I'm a perv anyways but just because I like to fuck it doesn't make me a bad guy." I'm not sure if he was giving me his confusion, making a statement or if it was an offer. But I wasn't going there with him no way, no how. I kept on cooking like he hadn't said a word to me.

After dinner I cleaned the kitchen up again and was running the water so I could do dishes. Paul came up behind me and stuck his hands in the warm soapy water and splashed it on the front of my tank top. He was breathing hard when he put his lips up to my ear "Oops I got you wet." Then he did it again except his warm wet hands were roaming over my breast, gently massaging them. Oh he was getting me wet alright.

Finally getting my senses back I went to step away from him and he pushed me hard up against the counter. I could feel his hard on pressed to my ass. If I didn't stop I wasn't going to "I can't do this."

He moved away from me so I could move too "Can't or don't want to?"

I wasn't looking for a one night stand and to make things even more complicated in my life "I'm really confused. I just broke up with Edward and I'm not looking to rebound on someone. I like you and think you are so sweet but I can't right now." The last thing I wanted to do is hurt Paul in anyway but I felt he deserves honesty from me. I just hope that we can still be friends.

The rest of the night was watching movies and joking around. Paul seemed to understand where I was coming from and didn't push the issue again. But he did start tickling me when he thought part of the movie was funny and I didn't laugh. I was laughing so hard then and I was trying to get away from him.

He held me down on the couch with his body "Maybe you shouldn't pick Jacob until you know what you're missing."

His mouth was kissing my cheek, neck and at the top of my breast that was showing from my tank top. Everywhere but my lips "We shouldn't do this." I said the words but my body was betraying them. When his hand went under my shirt that was more than enough to make it obvious to him, I liked it.

Responding to Pauls touch only seemed to encouraging him. His fingers were at my panties moving them over with my shorts. Running them down my folds he and was making me moan. Pushing my body against his "Oops I made you wet again." Oh yes he fucking was.

We were both getting way too involved in the moment and I had to stop but not before he kissed me. It was a tender but a hot kiss too.

I slept on the couch and thought about tonight with Paul. I don't think I'm ready for that though.

I borrowed Billy's truck to go get Jacob. We were going to pick up his clothes and go back to my house to stay there. Charlie and Billy both agreed that Jacob being with me was a good idea for now. It made me feel better having someone there with me and Jacob is going to start straightening out his life, one day at a time.

There was a man standing in the middle of the road that came out of nowhere. Just standing there smiling and I swerved to miss hitting him. Then I slammed on the brakes. I thought Jacob was going to hyperventilate. At first I thought he was hurt from being thrown around in the truck. But it looked like he had seen a ghost "You can see him too?"

"Well it's kind of hard to miss seeing a half-naked man standing in the middle of the road." I'm not that blind to miss a gorgeous bronzed man.

I hope you enjoyed reading me. I love reading your replies; they make my day and put a smile on my face.

Any ideas of who the dream man?