this was a voted couple a LONG time ago, around when I first made my fanfic account. im ashamed to admit that I completely forgot about it ~facepalm~

anyway, i currently-meaning as im writing this-dont have internet access, nor do i have any of my manga because it's sitting in a shed about two hours away as it has been for the last two years (heres hoping its still in reading condition), so if this fic is lame, i apologize in advance

Note: this takes place when Light has no memory of being Kira

other than that, try to enjoy~


"I don't get it," The very words never left the experienced detective's mouth, making Light begin to think that the man sitting in front of him was a hopeless case.

"It's very simple," Light reassured. "Really there's not anything you couldn't get. You just have to make polite conversation. Maybe ask someone to dance to keep your image," Their school was having some fundraiser in the form of a formal dance in which all the faculty and students were invited. Being a very prestigeous school, it was safe to expect that there would be plenty of people bringing money to donate.

"I understand that part," L replied, rolling his eyes, clearly bored with the entire thing already...and the dance wasn't for three weeks...

"Then what's the problem?" They had been sitting up in the hotel room talking for what felt like an eternity waiting for members of the team to arrive and Light was getting tired of the conversation. (Though he was grateful that Ryuzaki disabled the monitors so the team couldn't watch them anymore...)

"What I don't get is why I would go,"

"...Because...they invited you...?" Now it was Light's turn to be confused.

"Look, Yagami-kun, I get that...'making nice' is something you're very fimiliar with and being in a setting that requires that to such a high degree is something you're more than comfortable with. But I can't say the same for myself. I don't play nice, I don't talk nice, and I can't pretend like I do. Even for a night,"

Light frowned at this. He should have known better than to think that Ryuzaki would ever come to a formal dance. The man hated wearing shoes for god's sake! There's no way you'd be able to get him in a tux! Or at the most, a nice sweater...

Which was a problem for the younger student because he would really like to see Ryuzaki have a little bit of fun for once, instead of sitting behind a computer, a monitor, or a vast pile of paperwork. It was simply too depressing...

"Then...Why don't we skip the dance and do something else?" Light suggested optimistically.

"Why would we do that?" L inquired boredly, already preoccupying himself by dropping sugar cube after sugar cube into his small cup of coffee.

"Because my dad already knows about the dance, and he expects that we'll both be gone that night. We might as well use the oppritunity to do something instead of working,"

L paused at that, making Light hold his breath and feel almost hopeful and Ryuzaki would accept the excuse and cave. But instead the older man looked Light over suspiciously. "Why are you so eager to get me away from my work?"

Light froze at that tone. It took him so long to convince L that he wasn't Kira! He wouldn't be able to stand his idol not trusting him again, all because Light just wanted to spend some time with him! "I-I...I just..." The burnett hung his head in defeat. "No reason, I guess..."

L's expression changed to one of mild interest at Light's sudden dampening of his mood. He wasn't used to the boy sitting in front of him being submissive so suddenly...or at all! Something was wrong and for once the detective thought that Light's unusual behavior had nothing to do with the Kira investigation. It seemed-dare he even think it-genuine... "Yagami-kun?"

Hearing his name, Light looked back up, curious due to L's softened tone. He wasn't prepared, however, for L's wide-eyed stare locked with his own, making him hesitate to even breathe knowing that those same eyes have seen so much more than his own ever will. It was...intimidating, to say the least.

"Yagami-kun, I know that you don't do things to simply do them," Ryuzaki stated simply. "And I'm not making any sort of reference to the investigation. I'm only stating a well-known fact: you have a reason for everything you do. And if you'd be willing to tell me what that reason is now, I'd be willing to listen."

If it had been any other situation, or with anyone else, Light might've started talking up a storm. He might've given a million different reasons as to why he was acting the way he was. That's the way it had always been before.

But now it was different. Now the normally intelligent teen felt like an ass, sitting there, wasting his idol's time. He felt like even though Ryuzaki was trying to get him to speak up, Light had no right to tell L what he was thinking. He felt like the older man had better things to do than to listen to the ramblings of some stupid kid, even if that stupid kid had looked up to him for years, back when his dad was home more and told Light stories of a miracle detective that could solve any puzzle you gave him, no matter the number of pieces or how much was missing.

When was it...that this admiration...turned to love? Light had no idea, and the confusion was keeping him silent. There was no way he deserved to tell the infamous L how he felt. Not when Ryuzaki had better things to do.

"It's like I said before," Light finally stated. "I don't have a reason. I just thought it might be fun,"

Ryuzaki didn't seem to accept this explanation. Being as inquistive as he was, he couldn't help but become curious and dive right in to analyzing everything that Light was doing. The lack of verbal communication suggested that there was something embarrassing on the teen's mind...The lack of eye contact suggested nervousness...The color on Light's cheeks signified the rush of blood flow which comes from an increased heart rate, something that would happen when the person in question had something to hide. He wasn't be defensive, so it likely wasn't involved with the investigation so why-

A light clicked on in the detective's head. "Oh, I see," he murmered aloud, catching Light's attention. Before the teen could question further, his lips were suddenly captured in a firm kiss as his hero's slightly chapped lips enclosed over his own.

Light couldn't resist the sudden surge of heat that made its way across his face, reaching his ears and neck. His eyes were wide open in disbelief, trying to be sure his senses weren't decieving him and L was indeed kissing him.

As if to reassure his hopes, L pulled back and locked gazes with Light, the once prying stare softened and filled with something Light had never seen before, not in L's eyes. He recognized it, though. From the way his father looked at his mother, from the way Light's own eyes looked when he caught his reflection while thinking of the man in front of him...


He didn't dare speak. He didn't dare try to confirm this discovery, for fear that he'd be wrong. But L seemed to know this.

"Light?" The masculine voice was tender. Light had never heard it that way before...And he'd never heard L say his first name, not to address him. "Light, please tell me that you're not in this pain simply because you love me,"

Light couldn't speak. He tried, oh, he certainly tried...But all he could manage were the motions. The sounds never came. He tried to say yes. Tried to confirm that it was fear that made him act this way. But for the first time, he was helpless.

And L was merciful during this time of confusion, pulling the fragile teen into his arms, something that both of them needed...something they both wanted for a long time...

And Light held onto the man he loved, his grip tight as he had no intention of ever letting go.



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