A/N: I had this idea this morning and just had to write the story! A cute and hopefully funny one-shot!
It was almost midnight. Where was Edward? He was usually here by now.
I sighed and rolled over on my side. May as well try and get some sleep, I thought to myself.
The sound of my window opening startled me. I shot up into a sitting position. But instead of Edward coming through my window, it was Emmett. He struggled to squeeze through the small space, grumbling to himself angrily. He finally managed to get through, and leaned against the wall casually with a mischievous glint in his eye.
"Emmett!" I whispered, for fear that Charlie would wake up. "What are you doing here? And where's Edward?"
At the mention of Edward, Emmett scowled. "Edward," he sneered the name, "Has gone on a short hunting trip. And I am here because I need your help."
I was beyond confused. What could I possibly help Emmett with? It's not like I could do something that he couldn't do. "Help with what?" I asked scornfully.
Emmett moved from the wall and sat on the edge of my bed. His eyes bore into mine, his expression pleading. "I need you to help me prank Edward."
"No," I answered automatically. Why would I do that? "I won't help you. Now can you please go so I can get some sleep?"
"You don't understand," Emmett whined. "He filled my Jeep with scrambled eggs! And I can't get the smell out!"
"Why did he do that?" I asked, shocked. I didn't know Edward would do something like that.
Emmett rolled his eyes. "Apparently I was thinking too much about me and Rose last night when we—"
"Okay, okay!" I cut him off, disgusted. "I get the picture."
"You have to help me, Bella!" Emmett pleaded again.
"No, Emmett," I sighed. "As much as I disapprove of Edward's actions," I fought to hide a smile at the thought of Emmett finding scrambled eggs in his Jeep, "I'm not going to prank my boyfriend. Why don't you get someone else to help you? Jasper, or even Alice?"
Emmett shook his head. "No. You're the only one who can help me."
I was confused again. What could I do that the others couldn't? I was just a weak human. "Why?" I asked, my tone filled with disbelief.
"Two reasons." Emmett held up a finger. "One, Edward can't read your mind." Okay, I guess that made sense. Emmett held up a second finger. "Two, you're human." That one didn't make sense.
"Why would it be helpful that I'm human?" I challenged.
Emmett rolled his eyes. "You'll see. I have a plan."
I shook my head. "I still haven't agreed to help you," I reminded him.
The mischievous glint returned to Emmett's eyes. "If you don't help me, I'll force you to go on a date with Mike Newton," he threatened.
"You can't make me do that!" I gasped, my words coming out louder than I intended. I paused for a second, and relaxed when I heard that Charlie was still snoring.
"Oh, yes I can," Emmett contradicted. He flexed his biceps. "Even if it means I have to drag you there and hold you in the chair."
I felt all color drain from my face; I knew he was right. "Okay," I finally relented. "I'll help you."
"Great!" Emmett grinned. "Here's the plan."
I hated when Bella had to work. Why couldn't she just let me pay her college tuition? I sighed. Oh, well; Bella's adorable stubbornness was one of the many things I loved about her.
I decided to help pass the time until I could pick her up by listening to some music. I chose one of my several Mozart CD's, put it into my stereo, and pressed play. However, instead of Eine Kleine Nachtmusik coming through the speakers, I heard:
I love you
You love me
We're a happy family
With a great big hug,
And a kiss from me to you
Won't you say you love me too?
I quickly hit the eject button and studied the CD. The Best of Barney was written on the front. I checked the rest of my CD's, and found The Best of Barney in all of my cases.
I growled. Now I knew why Emmett had been blocking his thoughts from me lately.
"What's the matter, Eddie?"
I whirled around to see that Emmett was leaning casually against my doorframe, a wide grin stretched across his face.
"Did someone steal your CD's?" he taunted.
I growled at him. "Where are they? Give them back!"
Emmett shook his head. "Sorry, Eddie. No can do."
"Where are they?" I repeated.
Emmett grinned wickedly. "La Push," he answered smugly.
"What?" I thundered. "You put them in La Push? Are you trying to start a war?"
Emmett shook his head again. "I didn't put them in La Push. I got a little help from Bella."
Now I was beyond furious. "You let her go to La Push?" I shouted. "It's unsafe there!"
Emmett put his hands up defensively. "Relax, bro, she didn't go far. And I was standing at the border line watching her the whole time."
I relaxed a bit, but I was still mad. "Now she has to go there again to get those CD's back…" I muttered to myself.
"Not so fast, Eddie," Emmett interrupted. "She's working for me. And you won't get your CD's back until you've served your punishment."
I sighed. "And what would that be?"
Emmett grinned. Uh-oh. This would not be good.
The next day
This was beyond embarrassing.
I would never live this down, no matter how long I lived.
My family was laughing boisterously at me. The students were snickering at me. Even Bella was trying to hold in chuckles, and failing completely.
If I was human, I would be tomato red from the tips of my ears to my toes.
Because my punishment was that I had to wear a cocktail dress to school.
Emmett would pay for this, I vowed as I took my seat in English. The teacher covered his mouth with his hand to try and muffle his chortles when he caught sight of me. As long as I was able to survive the rest of this day.
Well, I hope that was funny! It was my first attempt at humor in a fanfic. Tell me what you think!