Legend of Zelda a' la Jane Austen

By Shannon

NOTE: I don't own em, so don't sue me. I'm poor.

The sun smiled on Hyrule one morning, as flowers bloomed, the birds sang their merry little songs, and the butterflies flew about the trees. A man, by the name of Lord Link of Kokiri-Hyrule, galloped on his horse, Epona towards Hyrule Market Town. He was a dashing, young man with blonde hair, blue eyes, and always had a keen sense for good fashion.

The ladies always fell for Link and he liked the attention, but he only had eyes for one woman, Princess Zelda of Hyrule. Today, he was riding his horse to the castle to ask her hand in marriage. His brown, three-piece suit was neatly tailored and pressed and a gold-chain watch was tucked perfectly in his vest pocket. In another vest pocket was a velvet ring case containing a diamond ring.

He rode Epona through the castle gates, smiling and tipping his hat to the guards as he made his way to the main road toward Hyrule Castle. The guards waved and went back to ther duties.

"I wonder what Lord Link is up to?" one guard asked another one.

"Maybe he's going to try to court Princess Zelda," the other guard responded.

"Don't you know? He's ALREADY courting her," the first guard replied. "Now that they're courting, I wonder what he's going to...."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" interrupted the second guard.

"Good Lord, don't tell me, man! I just couldn't imagine them together like that!"

A guard tied Link's horse to a post as he entered the castle. He adjusted his collar, dusted off his coat and suit, and swallowed hard. A servant escorted Link to the parlor where Princess Zelda was waiting for him.

"My dear Princess," Link said to her. "You look marvelous." He took her hands in his and playfully kissed her.

"You're so handsome, Link," said Zelda as she planted a kiss on his nose. "What do you want to do today? Go for a walk in the gardens? Play croquet? Chess?"

"Well, not exactly, my dear," Link replied as the two sat down on sofa. "As a matter of fact, I have a favor to ask of you."

"A favor?" asked Zelda. "You rode all this way to ask me to do you a favor?"

"Yes, a favor. Now, it's not just any favor, my dear. This favor is going to last your entire life."

"A favor that's going to last my entire lifetime?"

"Yes, Zelda. Do you have any idea what it is, my dear?" He pulled his riding gloves off of his hands and stuffed them into one of his front vest pockets.

"No, I don't."

"Well, then, I'll ask you anyway." He got down on one knee, pulled the velvet ring case from his pocket, and opened it to reveal the diamond ring inside. Zelda's eyes widened and clasped her hands over her mouth.

"Zelda, my love, will you marry me?" Link asked.

Tears of joy sprang from Zelda's eyes as she nodded. Then Link took the ring and put it on her delicate finger. The two embraced and kissed rather passionately.

"Let's make haste," Zelda said smiling. "We must tell my father of the good news!" She grabbed his hand and the two ran toward King Harkinian's study.

King Harkinian was Zelda's father and only surviving parent since her mother died when she was a baby. He had raised her from infancy to adulthood with the help of Baroness Impa of Sheikah-Hyrule, a servant. King Harkinian was also the King of the land of Hyrule. He was a good King and everyone loved him.

King Harkinian was busy in his study, reading a rather worriesome memo, when a sharp knock came from the door.

"Who is it?" the King called from his study.

"It is I, Father," Zelda responded.

"Come in, dear." Zelda and Link came in, holding hands and smiling. "Guess what, Father?" Zelda asked.

"Well, um, I don't know, my dear. Tell me."

"Link and I got engaged! Isn't that wonderful?"

King Harkinian smiled. Now his daughter finally had a suitor and the near future, Hyrule will have a new king and eventually, an heir to the kingdom of Hyrule, but current problems faced King Harkinian. Lord Gannondorf from the desert had been threatening to overthrow the monarchy of Hyrule and take over as dictator and fascist lord. Most importantly, he was after the Triforce, the symbol that kept Hyrule in harmony.

Now Gannondorf wanted to meet with King Harkinian that afternoon to discuss "peace terms," as indicated in a memo the king was looking over once Zelda and Link burst into his study.

King Harkinian had an idea. "Link," he said. "Gannondorf will be arriving this afternoon to the castle."

Zelda gasped and shivered with fear.

"Now, now, Zelda, let's not panic. I haven't finished what I was saying. Link, can you do me a favor?"

"Yes, your majesty."

"Son, you have a sharp-eye with a pistol, is that not true?"

"I am good with a pistol, your majesty, especially with hunting."

"Good! Now here's the plan I have." The two discussed it and agreed on it.

"If you assassinate Gannondorf, I will let you have my daughter's hand in marriage," said King Harkinian.

"It's a deal," Link replied and the two men shook hands. Zelda looked out of the window of her father's study and saw a man clad only in black-colored clothes. That man was Gannondorf. He made his way up the path and entered the castle.

"Father, he's here," Zelda said.

King Harkinian handed Link a loaded pistol and told him to hide behind a curtain while he and Gannondorf were talking. After Link was hidden, Gannondorf came in with a smile.

"Well, your majesty," he said slyly. "I have a propostion to make." He grabbed the king and Zelda and held them against a wall near the curtains where Link was hiding. Gannondorf put a gun to their heads.

"You give your power over to me this minute and I will let you two live, however, if you do not comply, I will kill you both! I will give you five minutes to think about it."

Link swallowed hard. His hand was shaking as he aimed the pistol at Gannondorf's head. He closed his eyes and fired, just grazing Gannondorf's hair.

"Who was that?" snarled Gannondorf angrily, aiming the pistol at the curtains. He started firing randomly at the curtains until a small bullet came flying toward him, smacked his head, killing Gannondorf instantly.

Zelda, upon seeing the incident, fainted while her father came to inspect the damage. He found Link, still alive, with gunshot wounds to his shoulders and another to his left arm. His right hand dropped the pistol, unloaded. While shot, Link still managed to kill Gannondorf with the last remaining cartridge.

Zelda regained consciousness and came to her financee's aid. "Link, are you all right?"

"I'm fine," he mumbled. "I....I just got shot in the shoulders and my arm. N....nothing to w...w...worry about."

Tears welled in Zelda's eyes as she used a wet cloth to clean Link's wounds. "Father, send for the royal doctor immediately!"

Link was taken home the next day and doctors kept their eyes on him. Zelda visited him every day and always made fresh tea for him and read poetry to him in the afternoons. When Link was well enough, the two would go for walks and do more things together, knowing that the kingdom of Hyrule was safe from evil.

Sometime later, the royal chapel filled up with several people. A minister stood at the front, holding a Bible. The church was decorated with flowers and ribbons. Seven women stood at one side of the pulpit and seven men stood on the other side. Link was among the seven men.

The organist played a procession piece. A flower girl walked down the aisle, tossing carnation petals on the floor. Then, the ring bearer followed, holding a pillow with a gold wedding band resting on top. Then, Zelda appeared, with a bouquet in hand, walking down the aisle. She met Link at the altar while they recited wedding vows from the minister.

"Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, do death do you part?"

"I do," Link replied.

"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, do death do you part?"

"I do," replied Zelda.

"Then I pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

Link had been waiting all his life for this moment, and Zelda, too. They closed their eyes and kissed each other with a sensual passion that could only be experienced after the exchange of wedding vows.

People cheered, cried, and threw rice as the two ran out of the church and into a carriage nearby to escort them to their bridal suite in Hyrule Castle. Upon their arrival, Link and his new bride held hands as they walked over the threshhold to the wedding chamber. Since Link's arm and shoulders were still sore from his gunshot injury, he couldn't carry Zelda.

"I love you, Link," whispered Zelda to her new husband.

"I love you too, Zelda," Link whispered back. "I don't know about you, my dear, but I'm looking forward to the wedding night." He winked at her.

"You naughty man," Zelda whispered, grinning from ear to ear. "And our wedding night will be special because I'll be spending it with you, Link, my new husband.

They got up to their bedroom, embraced each other and kissed. "I doubt we'll be getting any sleep tonight, Zelda, my love," Link said, smiling and winking at her. Zelda smiled at him and the two entered their bedroom, closing the door and locking it shut.