Tonight was going to be perfect, a date with Emily fields. Chinese food, movies and some much needed alone time. Those short but sweet kisses drove me wild outside The Brew earlier in the day. I knew for a fact that the date would take my mind off finding out that I'd lost my place on the swim team. Not that I'd be missing out on Emily in a swimsuit I'll still be practising.

What was coach thinking anyway?! Surely she wants her star performers Emily and I working together to crush the opposition! I was not looking forward to breaking the news to my notoriously overbearing father that I couldn't swim because I got a C in maths.

If there was one person to make me feel better it would be Emily Fields, it still gives me goose bumps to think that she's my girlfriend. The girl who helped me come to terms with who I am is finally mine. Although she is lucky to have me, a girl who is willing to sit through Rudy when action movies are my favourite.

After all of this contemplating to myself and many strange looks in the Chinese restaurant, my order was called out. I decided to crack open my fortune cookie which was always my favourite bit of any Chinese food. I was a sucker for these things…my fortune read "tonight will be full of surprises take your time and think them through". This made me wants to get to Emily's house and get my surprise.

I was fast approaching the field's house in my own bubble thinking about how life was on the up I'd had a pretty tough year but finally I have the girl of my dreams and I could finally be myself at home with my parents. The house was now in view, the porch was lit up. Am I late? I looked down at my watch and noticed it was 7: 59. Is Emily outside waiting for me?

I peered around the corner and saw the very last thing I expected to see, Emily was indeed outside but she wasn't waiting for me. She had that Nate guy all over her! I wanted to go over there and punch the guy and scream at him for touching let alone kissing my girlfriend. I was frozen to the spot I wanted to go over there but my feet just wouldn't move. Then it occurred to me Emily wasn't exactly pushing him away the kiss was becoming more intense. My heart broke when I realised he wasn't all to blame. I couldn't face this I had to get out of there.

So I stormed off throwing the Chinese food in the trash and then pushing the trash can over. Partly in anger and partly in the hope that Emily might hear and actually stop kissing that creep. As I carried on walking home the anger boiled up inside of me "HOW COULD SHE DO THIS" I yelled probably a little loudly but right now I don't care. She knew I was coming at eight; it was her that suggested the time. Did she want to break up with me and this was her way of telling me? Was she too afraid to say something to me so instead she gets with him to push me away?

By the time I was home the rage had turned into grief. I had my key out ready to get into the house but the tears had started to form. I dropped the keys and slid down the front door I found it hard to breathe between the sobs. I couldn't let my parents see me like this there would be too much explaining to do. They have only just accepted this is who I am; I could hardly imagine my father wanting to hear about this.

I managed to pull myself together and open the door and I headed straight upstairs and got under the covers of my bed. I just wanted to go back and make sure this never happened but I'd witnessed it first hard. Whenever I shut my eyes I could see it all over again it made me feel sick to my stomach. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and noticed three missed calls and a text all from Emily "where are you? I just found Rudy out especially for us ;) x" the tears soon returned. I decided to text Emily back, my initial idea of "I see you are bored of lady kisses" was soon deleted. I went with "sorry, not feeling well. Need to cancel."

I flicked on the TV to see if anything was on not that anything could make me feel any better. It was like some kind of nightmare the only thing that was on was Rudy. With that I decided to see if I could get some sleep. A few minutes later my eye lids became heavy and I drifted off to sleep.