"Hi Sherlock, it's uh… just me again. I figured I should stop by today of all days. I have brought more yellow lilies for you. I recall you saying that they were your favorite. Especially after…" John paused and took a shaky breath. "After we had started dating. Those times were good, weren't they? It has been three years now, ya know? Three years since I lost you. The pain still has not ever gone away. I am still living at 221b. Right now you would probably be scolding me for sentiment," John chuckled dryly and felt his cloudy blue eyes tear up.
Wiping at them, he bent down in front of Sherlock's shiny black gravestone. His suit creased around his joints but he could not be bothered to worry about getting wrinkles. "I miss you, Sherlock. It is a bit unbelievable. I really loved- love you. Even now," John bit back a sob and looked up to the sky and rapidly blinked his eyes to stop the swarm of emotions. Clouds overcast the sun and draped a shadow upon the cemetery and turned everything grayscale. John bit his lower lip and sucked in a sharp breath.
"I wish you could be here today, Sherlock," John's voice was small and choked as the tears spilled over onto his cheeks. "I almost could not do it this morning. Waking up and knowing that you were not going to be here with me," John continued on and tried to make his voice sound strong. John clutched the yellow lilies to his chest and used his free hand to support himself leaning against Sherlock's grave.
"I finally got everyone to believe that you were not at fake. Mycroft's cleared your name and everything," John smiled through his rapidly shedding tears. "It might just be his way of apologizing, but I'm happy," John bit his lip again and shook his head. What a sight he must look all hunched over his ex-lovers grave in his brand new suit. Sighing, John lay the flowers down at the foot of the headstone.
A small card was tucked in with the lilies. The cardstock was creamy beige with yellow and pale pink trim. On the lower left corner were two cartoon rats - one wearing a suit and the other wearing a dress. Scrawled across the blank square in the middle was John's slanted hand writing of the words: My Best Man.
Sniffling and bringing a hand up to wipe at the tears again John stood and adjusted his bow tie. He then dropped his arm back down and squared his shoulders and felt into his casual military posture. Forcing one last brave smile, John saluted Sherlock's grave. He held it for a moment before letting his arm rest back down at his sides. Taking in a deep breath John began to speak once more.
"You will always be with me sprit and mind, Sherlock. Even as I stand at the end of the isle, you will be right beside me. This is goodbye. The next time I talk to you and see you will be up in the clouds. Thank you," John's voice cracked as his composure slipped, "for everything," he finished softly and turned military point and walked away from Sherlock's grave for the final time.