The names are not mine, the rest - is.

Perpetual Crush

She sits and stares at her trinkets for most of class, she moves them, landing them in the light that comes from the big window, before finally painting them. I sit two tables back, watching her. Learning her moves. When we have Philosophy, she sits in the back because I once heard her say she would "just die" if she has to contribute. In French, she sits by my side, writing with her left hand, she mostly faces me and I can see everything from here, I can see what she writes and how she writes it; the cute little flowers she draws at the back of every paper. I can see her fingernails, sexy and pink. I can see her breasts; just asking me to touch them, though I know I can't. Her skin is creamy, strawberries and cream, as is her face, her cheeks are red sometimes and her eyes are really dark, almost black, like mine when I'm hungry. I see the lines, colouring her special, I see the fast paced stutter of her flowing beauty and I smell her. That scented sweetness she wears flies right into my nose during summer, though it doesn't cover that other scent. It doesn't mask the bitterness of her blood that I know is coursing through her.

All of what I see and what she is, can't and won't take away from the fact that she is human, and I am not.


I sometimes see him like, staring at me. Only when I look back, his eyes go wide and I don't know. It's like he's saying, "What are you fucking looking at, Swan?" So I don't look. At least, I try not to. Sometimes, he's just...there though, just leaning, or standing, with his hands in his pockets or, with the cuff of his sleeve covering his hand as he picks at something. Like, what does he think he's doing? Being all perfect and stuff. I tried to talk to him once but... Do you ever wish you could unsay things? Do you ever wish you could just unsay the garbage that comes out of your mouth? I think I ruined it. I think the next time I say something to him, it will be perfect and epic and it will end up in like, an embrace of some kind; two mouths crashing into one another in the most real way. That's what I want. That's what I think about most of the time. Even if we're here, in French class. Even if we're in the quad or he's a million miles away inside his mind. He'll finally know. And he'll see me. Bella.


Hello again! *waves and hides, peeking through fingers*
So this is something new for me... vamps... first person POV. It's all here and I'm really excited to share it with you! Some chapters will be shorter, some will be longer, and even longer than that when the story picks up.
Also, I have a schedule for the first time ever! Yep, I've written a good portion of this already and will be posting every Saturday, Tuesday and Thursday.

Much thanks and sexy kisses to my boyfriend, bestie, and lover - known as The Boy from here on out - who pre-reads for me.

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samrosey. xo