Finn and Santana. Phil Collins (Can't Stop Loving You). This is just a short one-shot that came out of no where. Enjoy. Disclaimer: I own nothing.
So you're leaving in the morning on the early train. I could say everything's alright and I could pretend and say goodbye.
She opens her eyes to realize she's sleeping on his chest.
It's not like it's a surprise anymore- it happened a few times now that he's practically living with her (even if it just for a few months). Her eyes flutter open and she looks up to his sleeping face. She doesn't smile. Instead, she sits up on her bead and look over to her bedside. There is a glass of water, a small framed picture of her family -her mama, her papa, herself and her little brother- and watches and candies wrappers. There is also a calender. She looks over her watch first -it was Saturday, but still.- 8.07 am. She sighed and pushed back her fallen hair.
She puts the watch back on the bedside table and her eyes fall on the calendar.
In red marker on today's date is written nicely in rough writings, which does not belong to her- TRAIN, 10 AM.
She doesn't know why she suddenly feels like there's a tons of brinks fall upon her, but she does as she glances over to the sleeping form next to her. She watches him- his chest rises and falls- and bites her lips from saying anything. She feels her fingers dig into her skin as she hugs her knees together.
She does not want him to leave.
She doesn't know how he had found her.
It was in the middle of the night when the door was knocked. She was sleeping (of course) and opened the door with the intention of giving the person behind the door a whole hour worth of cursing because you can't just go on and knock on somebody's door in the middle of the fucking night. And her eyes went wide when she saw him, just standing there, looking extremely tired.
She didn't ask anything and let him in.
Got your ticket, Got your suitcase, Got your leaving smile.
She steps out of shower to realize he's already cooking in the kitchen.
Her apartment is a small one, she lived alone (she doesn't know how she had gotten lucky, really). He turns his head when she walked into her small kitchen, and flashes her his lopsided smile that should make her happy, but doesn't. She gave a tight smile in reply, and watches as his face fell. He doesn't say anything after that as he serves her the pancake he always known she favors. She can feel his stares when she picks up the fork, and she knows he's too smart now to figure what mood she is in.
She hears he let out a sigh (a defeat sight), and something deep inside of her cringed. He says he's going to take a shower, to get ready. He doesn't say he's getting ready for what- he knows she knows. He's getting ready for the train ride. She takes a deep shuddering breath- she takes it quietly, so he wouldn't hear- and asks him casually, in a monotone voice she uses to hide her real tone.
"Got your ticket?" - She doesn't bother asking him about if he had done his packing. He did, last night. And she had to go out and have a drink while he did so.
He nods his head and answers her with a simple, "Yeah," and left after she responds with her, "Good."
She lets out a choke when she hears the water's running in the shower.
She doesn't know what had happened to him.
Last thing she had heard anything about Finn was he broke things off with Rachel (or is it the other way around?) and he's going to join the army or something. That was about... one and a half year ago. Things happened, shit flew. Brittany and her didn't last (she almost see it coming, but. whatever.) and she moved out of Lima, like she had always wanted to. He told her he did join the army, but his leg snapped or something and they have to kicked him out. He said he's okay now, but you can see the small limp on the right side when he's walking. But all and all, he's okay.
Things with Rachel didn't work out. And it has been rough.
He told her later he hadn't mean to meet her at all, actually. He was just roaming around the streets- somewhere that is not Lima- to figure out how to fix his deeply damaged life (He had always been like that- unsure, and uncertain. His future had always been fuzzy). He was making her breakfast when he's telling her this, and she joked about how good his meal was. How he should just open a restaurant, and should have her as his business-partner. Plus, she makes the best spaghetti. So, yeah.
But he had shook his head and told her that's just silly. They shrugged it off, and he continued with his story. Apparently, he realized the key chain of a red-skull with bow on it's bony head and swords running straight through the skull- he said, "I remember you had something like that. It was a birthday gift. You told me once that it was rare, it was the only one on this face of the earth. Your cousin, which is an artist, made it for you"- hanging on her car's rear view mirror. He saw it was parked in front of this apartment and asked the door man if he had known any Santana Lopez.
And that's the end of that.
I could say that's the way it goes, and I could pretend, and you won't know that I was lying.
He's ready and he's wearing his cologne.
He never wears those, only on special occasions. Like when he took her to an orphanage because he thought it would make him feel good to do something. She's already doing something -studying to be a lawyer had required for her not to waste her times as she wish- so, he told her it made him felt almost useless. She scoffed and rolled her eyes, saying he is useless (Except he cleans, he cooks, he buys groceries, he checks all the letters, he keeps everything in order). He ignored her 'cause he knew she hadn't mean what she said, and insisted she went to the orphanage with him.
She watches him from the corner of her eyes as he straighten up his black leather jacket in front of the mirror- she stays quiet, because she doesn't want him to see what she's feeling on the moment. She's feeling anxious and nervous, and maybe a little bit jumpy- all types of feelings she isn't certain of. And she hates when things go uncertainly. And she has always been the steady one- she wouldn't let him ruin that image, or see that side of her.
He finally turns to her, and maybe she blinked- but she saw the sadness covered his face before he smiled at her. "Let's go."
And she stood, grabbed her purse and went outside.
She think she loved him the moment she opened her door to find him sprawling over the couch with cooked meal on the table. It was a tiring day and she was having a hard time in class that day. She put her bag down and set her books gently on the table before looking over the meal, which had been covered.
There's a sticky note besides the plate that says- eat something, please.
She think she had confirmed that feeling when one night, he's on top of her and she's lying down under him- fully clothed, to her surprise- and he breathed those words. "I'm leaving."
We took a taxi to the station, not a word was said. And I saw you walk across the road for maybe the last time I don't know.
They take her care to the station. The radio let out a faint song on the background, and she's keeping her eyes on the road and he's attention is on the outside of the car's window. The rain is drizzling and she holds her head up high- because she knows how much he loves it when it's drizzling. She takes a short glance at him, and sees him smiling on the corner of his lips. And for a moment, she feels happy.
And then it all crush back down again and she realizes she might not be seeing that anymore.
She holds the steering wheel with a tight grip, her tan skin turns white. She inhales breath to calm herself down; it feels weird. She wants to go all Sue-Sylvester-ragging-mood but all at the same time, she wants to bawl her eyes out. The light turns green again, and she continues driving.
Feeling humble, I heard a rumble on the railway track.
She stands next to him as they wait for his train. She can see a few people are on the train station as well, some are crying and some are excited. She huffs and looks up to him. He bought her coffee, and himself a lollipop. He's looking down at her with those eyes that have glints or sparks or some shit that makes him so cute and smiling as he sucks that lollipop. She rolls her eyes at him, but couldn't contain the smile creeping on her lips.
She hears a train's coming and her heart stops.
She sees him shaking his head and he holds the lollipop stick out, away from his mouth. "That's not my train," and she feels like she could breathe again.
But still, the ending's still coming no matter what.
And when I hear that whistle blow, I'll walk away and you won't know that I'll be crying.
His train finally comes and he takes his luggage in his hands. He stands in front of her, and she awkwardly stands in front of him too. He says his goodbyes, and she bites her inner cheek because she really does not want to reply with the same sentence. He ducks his head lower so his eyes could meet hers and she lifts her chin up, wearing an expression that she hopes would make her the stronger one here. "Yeah. Whatever. See you later, Hudson."
He looks at her long and hard, and slowly smiles. "Okay," his voice is slow, and it breaks her. "Is there anything else you wanted to say to me, Santana?"
"I-I...," she stutters and thinks. Her mind's not working too well, and this does not happen often. She could feel the panic's rising within her and could be shown on the outside if she doesn't do something. Stay, please. She swallows, and the whistles blows and the man calls for everyone to be aboard. Her fingers fiddle inside of her coat's pocket, and she tells him, "uh, have a nice trip and try not to bump into any of the little human beings, alright Frankendork?"
He shakes his head and let out a scoff before it turns into a small laughter.
The whistle blows again and he begins to walk away. She takes a step back, because that's necessary and watches as he waves his hand.
She doesn't cry that night.
He comes back two days later and stands in front of her door, on the afternoon instead of in the middle of the night this time. Apparently, she had called him that day when he had left and told him to come back, Oak Tree. I need you. She is more than surprise to hear his explanation of her drunken call, but when he leans down to kiss her full on the lips, promising her he won't ever leave, she could have never feel any better.
He's going to open up a restaurant, and he says his life is just getting better.
She pushes him- 'cause he's just so sappy sometimes.