Ok, now I had this idea floating around for a while and peculated into something

I don't own Bleach or IS This whole thing is a learning curve for me anyways

Hoss growled, a Menos Grande hollow showed its ugly mug only 20 miles from a subdivision. He was several hours away from the farm and was picking up some equipment for the farm.

"METEOR STRIKE." he bellowed as the spiritual energy backed round plowed into the hollow. He jumped down and stood feet above the ground. He recently got a white hatori, plain with no markings on it to wear when he activated his shikai. Because he could manifest his spiritual power as a real item at times, the hatori flapped proudly in the breeze from the height up in the air. Nothing interrupted him until a bright white flash shot by him, knocking him off of his feet and he plummeted down to the ground.

He forced his spiritual pressure out near his shoulders and slowed his fall until he could get onto his feet. Sadly he could not make it and landed shoulders first into a blacktop parking lot and created a crater.

Hurriedly, Hoss resealed his shikai and prepared for hand to hand and possibly to use a new method of combat that he had yet to try in combat.

The white streak slowed down, banked and stopped at a hover about 20 feet above the pavement. although his knowledge of modern military equipment was limited, he could tell it was one of the Air Force's Infinite Stratos units. A woman's voice echoed from inside.

"Please state your name, rank and the organization of your affiliation along with the name of your IS."

"Hoss Lohmar, Corporal, Henderson Independent Military and…. Wait… What?"

(Author's Note- Just wait, Hoss is still with the Gotei. My madness will explain itself)

"The name of your IS. Seeing as how there is only one man who can operate an IS, what is your IS's name?"

"I'm sorry miss, but its not an IS." Hoss looked at the woman wearing the white armor weapon platform. 'Damn, she thinks my shikai is a IS platform. How am I going to get myself out of this one.' he reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigar, cut the cap and then bit down on it. "Matter of fact, its just a Peacemaker, nothing special." Hoss made it look like he was reaching for a lighter but pulled out a memory modification devise.

With a flash, Hoss used the cloud as cover to run to the implement dealer where he left his truck.

(Line Break)

Hoss slammed the chain binder down. The new combine harvester on his low boy trailer was to replace his old harvester. After last season, several repairs would be needed and the trade in was right, so why not.

He was about to get in the cab of his truck and shove off when, out of the corner of his eye, he saw several very important looking figures, all in military style dress uniforms. One was from the United States Air Force, no doubt. But the two others he could not identify. One who was with them, a woman, wore a rather odd uniform, it was plain black, nothing special. From the other side of the parking lot, he could make out several United Nations hot shots.

He pulled out the cigar he had earlier and lit it, only to do a modified Bugs Bunny impersonation.

"Eh, What's up Doc?"

"Corporal Lohmar?"

"Yeah, but I'm sorry. My military career was over after my enlistment, I didn't renew my sign up." Hoss was trying to climb up into his truck, but the guy was not having any of it.

"I'm afraid that this has nothing to do with your previous military service." The man in the air force uniform reached in his jacket and pulled out his wallet. "I'm General Johnson from the Air Force's Infinite Stratos 128th detachment. This is Sergeant Owen Montgomery and this lady with us is Field Commander Martha Smith. We are here to ask you some questions."

(Line Break)

Hoss sat in a boardroom. He followed the military guys here with his truck and was let in easy enough. They did relieve him of his revolver and searched his truck. The questions he was asked were simple enough, however there were conditions he couldn't answer them fully.

Even though he told them the truth, it wasn't the whole truth. It was times like this where he wished the Gotei would institute a legal division for situations like this.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know what your talking about." Hoss explained again.

"We have the footage from the my IS unit. Although I don't remember it, the unit-bunker feed lines captured everything. We have footage of you, with a very odd looking jacket on, with some sort of power coming off of you that was picked up by the hyper sensors. Flight data recorded it and classified it as a medium range weapon type IS unit."

'Shit, I forgot about the flight data.' Hoss maintained his façade.

"Need I remind you Corporal, if you lie to us, I can still have you court marshaled." The Sergeant looked at Hoss with fleeing patience.

"Who said I was lying Sergeant? It's impossible for me to run an IS, even then isn't there a small island of paperwork that has to be gone through for the UN pencil-pushers?" Hoss looked at the group with a straight face. That was until someone burst through the door to the room. It was a woman, around 30, but the thing that confused Hoss was she had reddish pink hair and a hair band that looked like rabbit ears made out of a pair of old Motorola razor phones.

"Everyone stop! Tabane's here." Everyone looked at each other. The military guys looked at each other, expecting some one else to explain why this woman was here. The only one who was silent for a different reason was the Field Commander.

"Tabane Shinonono." Ms. Smith looked like she was looking at a ghost.

(Line Break)

Hoss was now free, thanks to his friend who owned the independent military firm and the woman who burst through the door. She grabbed him by the collar and pulled him out.

"I guess I owe ya one for getting me out of there." She was still dragging the 6 foot 2 farmer by his collar out of the door. As soon as he got back to his truck, he tried to get into it and head back to his life.

"Oh no you don't. Chi-Chan wants to meet you."


(Line Break)

"DEAR GOD!" Hoss held on for dear life from whatever he could find inside the carrot shaped pod. Sadly his spiritual energy augmented strength crushed the conduit he latched onto like a paper towel tube.

When the nose of the pod touched the ground, it plowed in and slammed the Death Cowboy into the back of the seat that is the only one in the pod. He looked up and saw stars and carrots spinning around the rim of his hat like an old Road Runner cartoon.

"Ah, and there's my little Hoki." Hoss got himself reoriented to notice the crazy inventor was outside of the pod. Grabbing a part of the door, he drug himself out upside down and backwards. There was a loud thud as he hit the ground.

In the time it took him to get on his feet, he was drug off again by the rabbit wanna-be.

(Line Break)

"Chi-Chan, Oh Chi-Chan." Hoss started grumbing under his breath as he was drug by the crazed woman yet again. When she stopped through, he accidentally ran into another woman and tackled her to the ground.

"I am sorry miss, I was being drug around the area by that woman over there and…" Hoss clammed up as the woman picked herself up off the ground, ignoring him as she strode over to the woman who drug him around the building that he was now in.

The dark feeling of someone's spiritual pressure flooded the room. Being as how it didn't feel like a hollow or anything that he needed to concern himself with. It felt almost strained for the output it was at and no where near enough to warrant any damage to regular souls without power of their own. The thought that he could use this chance to get out of dodge came to mind. A window on the wall nearby was missing a screen and seemed to be an open invitation to jump out the window and shunpo back to the States, get his truck from the shipping company lot he managed to get it to and head back to the farm.

He'd deal with the paperwork for the Head Captain about this later

Hoss managed to get the window and was about to jimmy it open. As soon as he opened it and stood up, a black binder slammed him from the back of the head, knocking his hat off.

"Hey! What the hell was that for?"

(Line Break)

Ichika sighed. It was the beginning of his third year of the IS academy, and things were just like they were at year one.

"Alright, butts in seats." Ichika's sister entered the room. "This year we're doing something different. It has been arranged for you all to be trained in hand-to-hand. Your instructor may create a bit of a stir, so please mind yourselves. Corporal, can you please come in here?"

Hoss strode in the room, he was still in his normal jeans and shirt.

"Alright, this is your instructor, Corporal Lohmar. He has come here from Henderson Independent Military to assist us with making sure you are all ready after graduation. Corporal, I leave them in your hands." Ms. Orimura walked out without a look back.

"Alright, now, I'm going to lay some basics down. I am a honorably discharged US army soldier. So my rules are simple, I am to be addressed by Corporal, not sir. I work for a living. When I say jump, I want you all to answer how high. Am I clear?"

"YES CORPORAL!" The whole class resounded the answer.

"Good, now we have a lot of formalities, so I'll cut to the chase."

(Line Break)

"OK, tomorrow we start training. Meet me in the training field and don't be late." Hoss left the room and turned a corner

"Damn it Spencer, I know I owe ya one, but sending that nut to pull me out?" He grumbled under his breath. "And then sending me here to teach hand to hand to a bunch of women? You know I have contract commitments right now I have to work with. And the farm isn't going to take care of itself."

He stopped by the main office and saw the Secretary.

"I was told that I am to pick up some paperwork and other items from here." the woman looked up at him and flushed a slight red before looking down and thumbing through the stacks of papers.


"Hoss Lohmar."

"Ah ha." She pulled out a rather thick manilla folder with a cord wrapped around it that read 'Confidential' on the cover in red.

(Line Break)

Hoss looked at a door in the dorms. Glancing down at his newly issued keycard, the numbers matched, both in Romanized numbers and Kanji. He inserted the card into the slot and withdrew it quickly and heard the electronic beep that meant that the card was recognized. He opened the door and saw a young man with black hair sitting on a bed reading a book. There was only one other guy on this entire campus, and that was one of the students.

"Aw shit." Hoss muttered to himself.

Ok, questions, comments, concerns or just wondering what the heck is going on?

Questions will be answered, comments will be read, and how can I see what you are confused on?