Fumigation

Rated: T

Summary: When Frasier's apartment gets fumigated, he, Daphne, and Martin are forced to relocate to the Montana.

It was early one morning when Frasier woke up with a jerk as he felt something crawling on his arm. He glanced over at his arm and saw a tiny bug making it ways up to his shoulder.

He let out a scream, brushing it off quickly, his eyes growing wide as he saw more and more tiny bugs around his armoire.

He got out of bed and examined them. He noticed that on his armoire, there were cracks and holes.

"Termites," he growled. "Dad, Daphne, wake up!"

"I'm already up, Dr. Crane," Daphne announced. "I think we need to call an exterminator."

"Damn it," Frasier said, coming into the living room where Daphne handed him a cup of tea.

"Don't worry," she told him. "I checked for termites and ants."

"Thank you, Daphne." Frasier sipped at his tea, trying to understand how the termites managed to get in here.

"Damn, I just saw termites on my bed!" Martin exclaimed, limping into the living room with Eddie at his heels.

"Yes, Mr. Crane," Daphne replied. The phone started ringing moments later, and she went to answer it. "Hello? Oh, is it really that bad? I understand. Thank you." She hung up the phone and faced Frasier and Martin.

"Well?" Frasier asked. "What's the matter?"

"It seems Elliot Bay Towers is completely infected by termites. And we have to move out temporarily while it gets fumigated," Daphne told them both.

Frasier's mouth hung open. "Oh, that is awful. Where will we go?"
Just then, there was a knock on the door, and Daphne went to open it. She smiled at Niles as he came in.

"Good morning, Dr. Crane!" She said cheerily.

"Good morning, Daphne," he replied. "Frasier, there are some disgusting little bugs in the elevator." He looked down to see a few termites at his feet. He let out a yelp and stood on the couch. "My god, they're everywhere!"

Frasier rolled his eyes. "They're termites, Niles. The ElliotBayTowers has to be fumigated. Dad, Daphne, and I need to find a place to stay during this."

"Don't forget Eddie!" Martin snapped. Eddie barked.

"Can't we just leave Eddie to get fumigated?" Frasier asked, which only got him a glare from his father. "I'm joking!"

Niles glanced over at Daphne who was now stirring honey into her cup of tea. He sighed wistfully. She looked so beautiful even doing the most mundane things.

"Frasier," he said when an idea hit him. "You can come to the Montana for a few days. You, Dad, and Daphne!" Eddie barked. "And… Eddie."

Frasier knew exactly what Niles was doing, but what choice did they have? He could always get a hotel, but he felt more comfortable staying with Niles. The Montana had a few spare rooms, and it was very spacious. It would be the perfect substitute for the Elliot Bay Towers.

"You know what, Niles?" He asked, biting into a bagel. "We will accept that offer. We'll get packed soon. Let me just call Roz and tell her I'll be a bit late." Frasier grabbed the phone and left to the other room.

"I know my apartment isn't as wonderful as Frasier's," Niles said to Daphne. "But, I do hope you enjoy it."

Daphne looked over at him. "Oh, Dr. Crane, don't think like that! I absolutely love the Montana! Not to mention that lovely little bird of yours. I will have a fantastic time! Thank you." She smiled warmly at him, and Niles felt as though his heart had melted. If things went according to plan, he would finally have Daphne after all these years.

Frasier and Martin drove in his car to the Montana, while Daphne rode with Niles.

He kept glancing at her on the way there, hardly believing his luck! Well, he supposed it was unfortunate that Frasier's entire apartment building had been infected with termites forcing them out for a few days, but Niles couldn't help but feel all giddy inside at the prospect of Daphne living in his apartment. Perhaps now he would gain the courage to tell her exactly how he felt, and hopefully, things would finally be great for him. After many months alone, he often felt as if there was no way to gain any happiness. He wouldn't mingle with anyone because his heart belonged solely to Daphne. He knew it was foolish to wait for her, but he was a fool in love.

"I will do my best to make things comfortable for you, Daphne," Niles said as they drove to the Montana.

"Oh, I already know it'll be just grand," she replied cheerily. "I always enjoy going over to your apartment."

"Well, you only come there for visits. It's a whole other thing when you're spending a few nights."

"Don't worry about anything, Dr. Crane. I'm sure everything will be just amazing."

He smiled softly at her as he pulled into his parking space.

He opened the door for her and helped her with the luggage she had put into his car.

"Thank you, Dr. Crane."

"My pleasure, Daphne."

They walked to the doors of the main lobby and saw Frasier, Martin, and Eddie waiting for them.

"Took you long enough!" Martin yelled. "I thought you were right behind us!"

"Decided to take the more scenic route," Niles responded, and Frasier noticed he glanced at Daphne for a fraction of a second. "Dad, you better hide Eddie. My apartment isn't so keen on dogs. That's why I had to get rid of my precious darling." He sighed.

"That thing wasn't a dog. I don't even know what the hell it was," Martin muttered.

"The point is," Niles said firmly. "They don't like dogs. So hide him somewhere."

"Where am I supposed to put him? In my shirt?"

"Not a bad idea, Dad," Frasier commented. "Make sure his face is sticking out of your collar so it looks like a man with a dog face."

"You think you're so funny," Martin sneered. "Actually, that was pretty funny. Good for you, Fras."

"Yes, yes, Frasier is hilarious! Now, what are we going to do about Eddie?"

"I tell you what we're going to do," Martin said to Niles. "We're going to march straight in and act like we own the place, right, Eddie?" He asked, looking down at his Jack Russell Terrier.

Eddie barked in eager agreement.

Niles rolled his eyes. "It's not going to work."

Daphne laughed. "I would like to see the man with a dog face sometime."

"Let's go," Martin said. He opened the doors to the main lobby and marched right in with Eddie at his heels. No one said or did anything as he went to the elevator. He gave Niles a smug look when he and the others joined him.

"Oh, be quiet," Niles huffed.

Niles unlocked the door to his apartment and opened it wide for everyone to come through.

"So, pick a room," he told them. "Um, Daphne…" He said, running slightly to her when she was about to head upstairs. "There's a spare room close to mine that I think you would enjoy." Frasier gave him a look, but he ignored it.

"Thank you very much, Dr. Crane," she replied.

When the rooms were chosen and the luggage was all put away, Frasier announced that he had to get going to the radio station before Roz would have his head.